Chapter Forty-Five Sunny #2
Hwanin gingerly presses his palm against the flat of my chest, right below my collarbones. My torso jerks at the light touch, as though I’ve been shocked by a defibrillator.
Still, I don’t pull away. I clench my back teeth and prepare myself. I’ve survived unspeakable pain before. I can handle this.
I was wrong.
Hwanin’s gi is both ice and fire, and I . . . burn. Torrential power floods my body, bringing unimaginable pain with it. It shreds me, piece by piece. It melts my skin off of my bones. But when I look down at myself, I remain unscathed on the outside.
It hurts.
My mouth opens on a gasp, but no sound escapes. My eyes widen until the skin around them tightens with strain, and tears fall soundlessly down my cheeks. I want to pull away from Hwanin’s hand. I want to die to make the pain stop.
But I can’t move.
“Uh . . . uh . . .” I can only whimper when I want to scream.
My hands twitch as Hwanin’s life force pulses through me, then my arms jerk against my sides. I can’t control my body, and my limbs flail against my will. I don’t know how I stay upright as my whole body starts convulsing, and my head whips back and forth.
“E-Ethan.” His name is a reedy whisper that clings to my lips. There is no way he heard me, but it’s the best I can manage.
“Stop,” Ethan cries at my side. “She’s hurting.”
What have I done?
I’ve sentenced him to certain death. Hwanin’s divine gi is too powerful, horrible in its beauty. It will burn Ethan alive.
“Please stop,” he says again.
He’s still alive? How?
“They will both die if he stops,” Yongwang answers, not unsympathetically. “Step away from her. Or the light will burn you to cinders.”
“I don’t give a fuck what happens to me,” Ethan growls.
“N-no,” I stutter. Ethan, go back, I want to tell him, but neither my voice nor my telepathy cooperates.
“Please tell me what to do,” he pleads. “Wh-what can I do to help her?”
“You can hold her.” Yeomla relents. “You can help anchor her, but you might not survive the contact.”
“Thank you,” Ethan says with genuine gratitude, completely uncaring about the part where he dies if he touches me.
Stop, you foolish, stubborn male!
I feel him step close behind me.
No, Ethan. No.
And he gingerly wraps his arms around my waist. With a sharp inhale, he pulls me flush against him. He groans quietly, like he’s holding in his pain. He’s hurting. But his arms don’t slacken their hold.
An exhale bursts past my lips, and I can breathe again. My arms fall limply to my sides, and my flailing legs still beneath me. And my head stops thrashing and drops against his shoulder.
“E . . . than . . .” I manage to mumble past my numb lips.
“I’m here, baby.” He kisses my temple. “You’re okay now. I’m right here.”
“Ass . . . hole . . .” I rasp. “I’ll kill . . . you if . . . you die.”
“Sure, sweetheart.” He squeezes me tighter against him. “Survive this, and you can do whatever you’d like with me.”
I feel his heart beating against my back, strong and steady. My heart slows its frantic thumping and mimics his solid rhythm until they beat as one. I’m home. I don’t have to be scared anymore.
Hwanin’s gi continues pouring into me with devastating force, but my Yeoiju grows and shines—powerful and unwavering. I no longer feel stretched too tight, like a balloon about to pop.
The divine life force is not too much for me. My Yeoiju and I can contain it. We can absorb it. It almost feels natural now.
Then as suddenly as we began, Hwanin drops his hand from my chest and stumbles back with a grunt. And I go limp against Ethan.
My breathing steadies as my strength returns to my body. I straighten away from Ethan, and he drops his arms without hesitation. I look over my shoulder at my beautiful husband.
“No,” I scream, my shaking hands hovering over his ruined body. The skin on his arms and chest has been burned clean off, down to his muscles. “N-no, no.”
“Look away, Sunny.” I hear the strain in his voice. He’s in agony. Of course, he is. “I’m going to be fine. I’m already healing. But I need you to look away, baby.”
“You’re hurting,” I wail.
“Not for long,” he rasps, then he turns to Hailey. “Please take her away. Just until I heal.”
“Come with me, Sunny.” Hailey wraps her arm around my shoulders and leads me away from Ethan.
I let her because I’m a coward. I can’t watch Ethan suffer a moment longer. So I turn my back on him and bury my face in Hailey’s neck. I don’t know how long I stand like that, shivering uncontrollably.
“I can take her now.” Ethan gently gathers me against his bare, unmarred chest. “I told you I’d be okay.”
I can’t stop shaking. He’s better now, but my horror is too raw.
“I’m so sorry I h-hurt you,” I force past my tight throat.
“Shh.” He runs his hand down my hair. “It hurt more to watch you suffer. It’s better this way.”
“B-better for who?” I fist my hand and pound weakly on his chest.
“For us.” His hand engulfs mine, and my fingers unfurl beneath it. “We’re both alive, aren’t we?”
If I wasn’t already in love with him, this would have done the job. And impossible as it seems, I fall even more in love with him.
“Thank you for being my anchor.” I press my cheek against his smooth, taut chest to reassure myself that he’s okay.
“It’s an honor,” he says with absolute sincerity.
“Who says things like that?” I scoff and push away from him, but I would never tire of all the corny nonsense that spews from his pretty lips.
“Me.” His guileless smile warms me like the sun in the dreary emptiness of purgatory. “But only to you.”
I dig my teeth into my bottom lip and drop my gaze to my toes. If I look at him for a second longer, I will pounce on him. And now is not the time nor the place for that. With a wistful sigh, I turn just in time to catch Yeomla and Yongwang gaping at me, their divine mouths hanging to the ground.
“Thought I’d drop dead, did you?” I drawl archly.
Yeomla, the god of Underworld, gulps. “Absolutely.”
“I had no doubt in the matter.” Yongwang nods in agreement. “Only a being with divine blood could survive absorbing a god’s life force. Or so I thought.”
But their gazes soon drift to a point past my shoulder, and all hint of humor leaches out of their expressions. Hwanin. I remember Yongwang’s grim warning. There will be consequences.
I warily face the god of Heavens, but Hwanin isn’t . . . a god anymore. He is still very handsome, his youthful face striking against his silver hair, but not so unbearably beautiful that I want to run away screaming. And his gi . . .
Hwanin doesn’t seem to notice the stares directed his way as he studies his hands, like he’s never seen them before. Then he pats down his body and bounces on his feet a couple of times. When he finally raises his head, the devastation darkening his eyes has faded ever so slightly.
“You . . . you’re mortal,” I accuse to the shocked gasps of my friends. “Your gi almost looks as faint as a human’s.”
“You are right.” A ghost of a smile flickers over Hwanin’s lips. “I am still a being of the Shingae, but I am as mortal as a human.”
“H-how is that possible?” I shake my head, dread creeping across my scalp.
I cannot stop until I have transferred all of my divine gi to you.
He transferred his divine gi to me. Why did it not occur to me sooner? How did I not realize that the “consequences” would also apply to me?
I thought I was only absorbing a part of his mighty powers. But he already told me the truth. He transferred all of his divine gi to me.
“I am mortal now because you absorbed my divinity,” he answers evenly. “You are now the goddess of Heavens.”