Chapter 41
Are second chances real?
Elena
After the conversation I had with Ana, my head has been spinning.
I’ve been mulling over the situation a lot, and although I was upset when I first heard her, she was right to point out that my situation with Victoria is worse than it was five years ago.
I live here, and after a lot of trial and error, I’ve found something I love doing, while she has her whole life in Madrid.
We’re at two extremes, and I can’t help but worry about everything; right now, Victoria’s relationship with Joana takes a back seat compared to all the other problems.
In an attempt to make this Saturday a little less dreary—and to let go of the fears I’m carrying inside—I snuck out of the hotel to go to the flea market to buy a couple of things with the idea of taking them to my mom’s house and having lunch with her.
Plus, I’m lucky today because we’ll be alone, we’ll cook together, and, if all goes well, I’ll be able to tell her what’s going on without fear of her judging me.
She’s been through the same thing I have; I’m sure she’ll understand, and I need someone to listen to me and give me advice, even if I’m the one who has to make the final decision.
After leaving the market with a couple of bags, I get in the car and head toward San José.
Driving has always helped me clear my mind, and as I drive down the highway, I can’t help but think about Jorge, Ana, and Carolina.
Over the past few days, Victoria told me that my future sister-in-law and my brother haven’t stopped talking to her since she arrived in Ibiza.
I suppose it’s inevitable that they’re worried about us, but I’m not sure I want them to remind us of how badly things went for both of us in the past; we need them to support us and encourage us to believe that our relationship will work out this time.
Inside the car, time flies by so fast that I don’t even realize when I arrive at what used to be my home.
I know that when my mother looks into my eyes, she’ll know the truth hidden behind my expression.
So I try to put on my best smile and ring the doorbell, and as soon as she opens the door, I hold up the bags so she can see them and hug her, surprising her.
“May I ask what you’re doing here, sweetheart?” she asks, surprised, with a smile on her face. “Have you gotten lost again?”
“I thought we could spend the morning together. I’ve been to the market and bought a sea bream that…” I laugh like an innocent little girl. “Could you make a roast for the two of us?”
“Of course I can!” she replies, and once inside, I walk to the kitchen and set down everything I’m carrying. “Jorge didn’t tell me you were coming.”
“He’s busy with his friends, Mom,” I say with a smile on my face. “Besides, I didn’t tell him either. I wanted us to spend a little time alone.”
“A girls’ day.” She laughs and gives me a little nudge in the back as she helps me. “Wait, did you buy a cake?”
“It’s your favorite, isn’t it?”
She smiles too and gives me a motherly kiss on the cheek. One of the things that defines my mom is this—how sweet she is to everyone. I’ve always wondered why my dad left her, but I’m glad that, at least, after everything she went through, she’s happy with the life she has here.
“How about we make some nice, cold lemonade? I found these lemons and…”
“They’re the best. How are the preparations going? Is everything ready yet?”
“Yes, finally,” I exclaim, exhausted. “The last orders arrived yesterday, and I have everything ready. I just hope Jorge stops making little plans and lets us rest a bit.”
“He already told me he took you hiking.”
“He’s crazy,” I say, and start laughing as I set the lemons down beside me and look for a knife. “He still wanted us to go all the way around the coast and spend the morning walking around there.” I shake my head. “Good thing Pablo wouldn’t stop complaining, or else we’d all still be walking.”
“You know how he is. He takes after your father in that regard.”
When she mentions Dad, I bite my lower lip and stay silent for a few seconds. At least until she steps away from me and walks around the kitchen, gathering everything she needs to clean the sea bream and start preparing the meal.
“How are things going with Victoria?” she asks me with interest. “I imagine it hasn’t been easy.”
“Well, that’s exactly what I wanted to talk to you about…”
“Has something happened?” she presses. “You know you can tell me anything, right?”
“I know, Mom…” I sigh and give her a small smile. “It’s just that…” I stop cutting the lemons and turn toward her. “Do you believe in second chances?”
“Of course I do, but why are you asking?”
“Victoria and I…” I look at her and tuck my hair behind my ear. “I know this is going to sound strange to you, but after all this time…”
“What, honey?” she presses, almost desperately.
“We kissed and… you know, Mom,” I confess.
“After that, I felt like things between us weren’t over, that we could still fix it if we wanted to,” I explain, biting my lower lip.
“And now we’re fine, just like before we got divorced, and Ana…
well…” I shake my head a couple of times.
“She started telling me to think about what I want, to open my eyes, to make sure things wouldn’t be like they were in the past… ”
“And what do you want?” my mother asks, looking me in the eyes. “No matter what others think, what is your heart screaming at you?”
“That I shouldn’t let this chance slip away and that I should give it a try…”
“So why all the fear?” She smiles and strokes my cheek. “I know you’ve had a hard time because of what happened with her, but that doesn’t mean you can’t be happy again. I wish I’d had a chance with your father. I swear I wouldn’t have let it slip away.”
“All I want is for us to be okay and to learn from our mistakes. But I guess not everyone has to see it that way.”
“Think about it: your brother and Ana saw you at your worst. Whatever they say, they’re doing it because they’re trying to keep you from going through that again.
” She holds the sea bream in her hands and runs it under the faucet to start scaling it.
“Don’t judge them for wanting to take care of you, and be grateful that they’re there for you. ”
“I do, but they make me feel judged.”
“There’s a solution to that, honey. Show them that things with Victoria can work out, and then they’ll stop talking about it. But,” she warns me, raising a finger and pointing at me, “if it doesn’t work out in the end and they’re right, you have to be humble and admit your mistake.”
“I wouldn’t be that foolish not to.”
“Come here…” she says, giving me a kiss on the cheek.
“I hope everything works out and that someday you’ll bring her over for dinner,” she adds.
“Now that you’ve told me this, I can tell you I didn’t like that you two broke up.
You made a beautiful couple,” she says, looking me in the eyes.
“I don’t know what happened, or the reasons that led to your divorce, but…
sometimes relationships don’t follow the same pattern for everyone.
Each one is special, different, and the solutions don’t have to be the same as for others.
No one should give advice on relationships, but… ”
“You just have to stick it out. There’s no other choice.”
“The important thing is that you’re happy, and if getting back together with Victoria is what gives you that tingling feeling in your stomach… go for it,” she encourages me. “Whatever happens, I’ll be here, as always.”
“Thanks, Mom…”
“Don’t thank me. Now, help me.”