Chapter 59
Who do you think you are?
victoria
The porch lights come on, and as soon as the door opens, Joana appears in a nightgown through which I can see much more than just her skin.
“Have you changed your mind and decided you do want to spend a good night with me?” she asks, running a hand along the wood, looking into my eyes with that kind of lust I let myself get carried away by long ago.
“We need to talk.” Without saying another word, I grab her by the wrist and push her inside.
“What’s wrong with you!?” she complains, and I close the door.
“Do you think I wouldn’t find out what you’ve done?” I ask, walking toward her and stopping just a few inches from her face. “Why did you call Elena while we were toasting?” I insist, pinning her body against the wall. “What do you gain by ruining our lives!?” I shout, making her jump in fright.
“Oh, that…” She runs a hand through her hair and sweeps it over one shoulder.
“Have they already told you it’s better if you don’t come back?
” she smiles maliciously. “I knew my plan to keep you here was perfect.” I don’t know what’s wrong with me, but her words make me so angry that I don’t even have time to think about my reaction, and my right hand slaps against her cheek. “What the hell are you doing!?”
“You’ve managed to screw up the only chance I had at being happy,” I say, my voice choked with tears, frustration, rage, and pain. “I don’t know what you stand to gain from this, but I swear it’s not me,” I say, a lump in my throat. “Starting today, I don’t want to see your stupid, filthy face.”
Feeling like I’m going to throw up, I step away from her and decide to go home.
“Victoria, please…” I feel one of her hands grab me, and when I turn around, Joana lets go. “Don’t leave like this. I… I just did what they asked me to. Alfredo wanted you to stay and insisted I do whatever it took to make it happen.”
“Alfredo?” I ask, and I burst out laughing at such stupidity. “You can tell him from me to shove his newspaper up his ass; he can go find someone else now.”
After letting go of me, I keep walking, and Joana steps in front of me.
“Don’t you see that you’re ruining your life?”
“And don’t you realize you’re missing out on wonderful things by dedicating yourself to a job that brings you nothing but money?
” I ask, pushing her out of my way. “I hope that someday you’ll open your eyes and think about giving yourself that kind of happiness that comes from the love of people who truly care about you. ”
“You’re an idiot!” she yells at me. “You’re going to regret this! You’ll see!”
“The only thing I regret is having wasted five wonderful years of my life on all this crap,” I say, feeling a twinge in my heart. “But this is what I needed to move forward without regrets, and believe me, I’m going to do just that.”
Before Joana can interrupt me again, I open the door to her house and walk away without looking back.
There are a lot of things I need to think about right now, but before I do, I need to free myself from the weight of the emotions I’m carrying inside, because otherwise, I know I’ll be unable to find a solution that puts an end to this fucking madness.