Chapter 23
Cienna
“No, no, no.”
Did you turn it off and on again? was all I could hear in my head, so I shut down my laptop. As it rebooted, I dropped my head onto the keyboard, muttering profanities to myself.
Five minutes remaining before parents would start heading this way for the classroom portion of Back to School Night, and I had nothing to show them other than an empty PowerPoint presentation.
With caffeine-and-adrenaline-led teacher mode kicked into gear, there was only room to panic about one thing at a time.
No time to dwell on the tiny voice reminding me what a horrible idea it was to take on this new project with Reed.
There was already a war roaring within me.
Must avoid at all costs vs. need to be close enough to smell him at all times.
This new development was going to fuck that right up.
From right behind me, someone exhaled, and it stirred my anxiety further.
“You okay?”
I turned toward the sound, and before I could react, Reed leaned down toward me.
All thoughts became a buzzing mess of static.
My heart banged in my chest, my anxiety ready to shoot through the roof.
I couldn’t tell if it was from my PowerPoint problem or that Reed and I were alone in my classroom.
Again. Would that normally stir my nerves with any other parent?
No, probably not. But with Reed’s proximity, every nerve was on fire.
“I… yeah… I just… I’m good.” Aside from being a stuttering mess and on the verge of a nervous breakdown.
I took a deep breath, and he kneeled closer to my laptop.
His gaze trailed over my face momentarily, and then he simply grazed my lower lip with his thumb.
I was immediately swept back to the parasailing boat.
Back to the moment when one simple touch settled all my racing thoughts and gave me the bravery to do something insane.
He snatched his hand back, and his eyes went wide. “Shit, shoot, sorry.”
I looked at him, dazed.
“It’s just, you and that face, and your lip…” He rubbed his hand over his chin. “You made that face before.” He cleared his throat. “So I know you’re not good, and that maybe you’re panicking, and I thought I could help.” He nodded toward my laptop.
“Hmm” was all I could muster for an initial response. Then I finally managed actual words. “I finished the presentation at lunch, and it’s not here.”
He moved right next to me, his arm brushing mine as he balanced himself. “May I?”
I couldn’t talk with him this close, so I quietly tapped my password on the login screen, and immediately, a picture popped up as my desktop came into view. A beautiful photo at the edge of Medano Beach.
A little “hmph” came from Reed’s lips, causing me to peek over at him to see his reaction. His eyes shone as he stared at the screen. “That was a beautiful place.” To my shock, he hadn’t pretended to ignore the picture. I was certainly trying to. “A great time,” he added.
A time when could have been was on the table.
After a brief pause, he began clicking buttons, and I sat back on my knees, watching. He squinted, his lips wiggled around, and he made a sucking sound as he pulled his lower lip in a few times. What those lips could do. I could get lost in the ideas I had for them.
He finally lifted his hands from the keyboard in victory. “Ta-da. Is this the file?”
Thank god. My entire PowerPoint was on the screen. Just in time, as shuffles and voices filtered in from the hallway. I gave Reed a quick nod of thanks, and he gave me a knowing smile and stepped back from the front of the room as I welcomed incoming visitors.
Bringing my hands together in a solid clap, more for myself than my audience, I began, “Okay, if everyone is settled and comfortable, I have a short presentation, and then you can walk around and see the great things your students have done in such a short time.”
All eyes fell on me, but there was only one set I could feel as I went through the slides, falling into my comfort zone, the place I was most confident.
I answered questions without pause. I proudly displayed my knowledge.
And I was rewarded with bobbing heads and smiles from my audience.
With all my willpower, I was determined not to peer over at Reed but slipped once, and his gaze on me set fire to my ears.
When my presentation portion was finished, the parents milled around, chatting with each other and admiring their child’s work. I meandered around the room and made sure to hit all the little gathered groups, shake hands, and highlight something special about each child.
That was easy stuff. I thrived on that part.
The hard part was seeing Reed out of the corner of my eye, moms laughing with him, touching his arm, flirtatious smiles.
Other times, I knew he was close, and my skin would prickle.
And as much as his interactions with thirsty moms woke something inappropriately possessive, I knew he was orbiting me as much as I was him.
Like when he’d edge closer or peer over when I was approached by another dad.
How I managed to stay composed was a skill I’d unknowingly honed from years of Back to School Nights. I couldn’t even recall a single “bingo moment” because my mind was adrift the entire time.
When parents started to leave, saying goodbyes and thank-yous, the pull worsened. The less that was in the way of the two of us, the harder it was to stay apart. Once the last parent was gone, Reed helped to gather papers that were left on desks and stacked the chairs for me.
“Thanks for doing that. You don’t have to,” I said as I approached him.
He stared down at me, his eyes holding an intensity I didn’t recognize but that my insides definitely appreciated.
“You were amazing. You are amazing.” Those words whizzed me back in time when he said the same thing months ago after an unforgettable day together.
He visibly swallowed, then stood up a little taller, glancing around the room. “Do you need any more help closing up?”
Biting my tongue, I shook my head because if I spoke, I might let everything I was holding back leak out.
“Off to meet up with the girls, then?”
I nodded, giving him a small smile. Those beautiful green eyes lit up with amusement while his lips quirked a smidge.
I loved that face. He wore that expression well, and it was so nice to see it.
His jaw clamped like he was holding something back.
Did he have something to say? Something he wanted to do?
If he touched me right now, I’d cry from relief.
But instead, his hands tucked into his pockets, and he rocked.
With so much hanging in the air, we still managed to look at our schedules and agreed on our first meeting time to coordinate this dance event.
“I guess I’ll head out, then. Abi’s with Daisy at home, and knowing her, she evaded bedtime somehow. Don’t let her fool you with that cute smile… she’s a tricky one.”
Fuck. At home. With someone. His someone. Whoever it was. Here I was imagining this electric current traveling between us. This pull. When realistically, his life, his home, was where his mind was. Clearly, I’ve read too many romance books.
His footsteps reached the door before he whispered my name from the doorway. “Be safe tonight.”
I smiled, and he returned it. And then he was gone.
Swamped with the heaviness of one million emotions flooding me at once, I fell into my chair, and it rolled backward, hitting the wall behind me with a thud.
Above me, the art canvas of twenty-four handprints from my first kindergarten class rattled.
A small part of me wished it had crashed down on me.
Maybe a good thunk in the head would get my thoughts in line.
With a whoosh, I wheeled my chair back to my desk and flopped my head down with a groan.
The sound of the door squeaking open caught my attention, and for a brief moment, I daydreamed of Reed running back into the room, rushing to me, grabbing my face, kissing me breathless, and telling me he couldn’t be apart from me.
Stupid, stupid romance novels. I’m burning them all when I get home.
I lifted my head and saw Darcy peeking in, then she called over her shoulder, “Guys, it looks like Cici won Back to School Night Bingo.”