Chapter 9
Lily was surprised to wake up on her own this morning.
Surprised and grateful.
She wasn’t sure how she would have reacted if she’d found Harvey in bed with her. And she needed a few moments just to herself to breathe and think.
How the heck was she gonna get out of here? If there were cameras and alarms on the doors and windows, as well as outside, she had no hope. She either had to figure out how to dismantle them, how to contact help, or how to take out Harvey.
Not that she wanted to hurt him. So far, he hadn’t really done anything to harm her. If you could call being kidnapped harmless.
This was going to be tricky, especially when she kept forgetting to pretend to be compliant.
After a shower, she put her old clothes back on.
Urgh, that was gross. She couldn’t bring herself to put the same underwear on so she went without.
But it still felt disgusting.
However, when she walked out into the bedroom, she found a whole set of clothes lying on the bed.
Checking the size, she saw that they were all perfect.
He’d planned this, didn’t he? He’d planned to take her, maybe not yesterday. He said the opportunity had just come up. But at some stage, he had been going to bring her here. He’d set this place up.
For her.
A shiver ran through her and she sat on the bed, wrapping her arms around herself. Normal people didn’t do this sort of thing. If he liked her, couldn’t he have just told her that?
Right. And how would you have reacted?
She probably would have shrugged and walked away, if she’d even acknowledged him.
She stared down at her hands. Where was her engagement ring?
Actually, it made no difference to her. He’d probably take it off, and honestly, he could keep it for all she cared. She didn’t need any reminders of her disastrous engagement.
She’d taken the bandages off in the shower, and her hands looked fine, a little bit red in places, but nothing too bad.
Lily hated that she’d done that to herself and could barely remember it. She stared out the window at the forest beyond. Even if she got out of the house, where could she go? She wasn’t good in situations like this.
Right, because you’ve been kidnapped so many times?
It wasn’t just that. It was everything.
Lily had become so used to other people running her life that making decisions seemed terrifying. What if she did the wrong thing? What if she went right when she should have gone left? What if she just ran and ran and never found her way out?
Maybe she was better off here with Harvey.
No, no, that couldn’t be right. She couldn’t just give up. She had to have some fight left.
But what happened if she did get free? There was nothing left for her out there.
Her wedding to Rick had been called off. Both families were broke. She had no trust fund. Not that she’d know how to access it, anyway.
She had no money, no skills, no family.
Except for Clem, of course. But would her sister even take her in?
She probably just saw Lily as indifferent and uncaring. And honestly, Clem was better off without her anyway.
What would life with Harvey be like if she stayed? Maybe it would be okay for a while, but would he get sick of her? She wasn’t really that interesting.
Lily rubbed at her chest. She could feel her heart starting to race faster and faster.
This was why she needed her pills. She was all over the place with her emotions and reactions.
She ran her hands over the clothes he’d chosen.
There was a soft pair of white pants and a blue-and-white-striped shirt.
They looked comfortable but elegant, exactly what she would have chosen for herself, and nothing like what her mother liked to put her in.
Everything had always been stiff and uncomfortable.
Lily wanted to try jeans, maybe even shorts.
She really was getting rebellious now, wasn’t she? She rolled her eyes at herself. Perhaps she should protest by not putting the clothes on. But at the same time, she just couldn’t stand wearing these clothes for another day.
And so she quickly stripped them off, then pulled the other clothes on. The material felt so nice against her skin. It was clear they were expensive, but they didn’t scream expensive.
Which was something else she liked too.
To her surprise, there was also a pair of ballet flats in the right size.
She slid those on and then looked in the mirror. She didn’t have any makeup to cover up her pale skin and the marks under her eyes. And her hair was still flat and lifeless, but she had found a hairbrush, so at least it wasn’t matted and knotty anymore.
All in all, it was an improvement.
Moving to the window, she took a look outside. The weather looked so nice today. The sun was already shining. She wished she could open a window, but she was scared about setting off those alarms again.
As far as she could see, though, there were only trees. They really were isolated out here.
Her stomach rumbled as she stood staring out the window. She needed to eat something. If she was going to get out of here and figure out her life, she needed to build up her strength.
Everything just seemed so overwhelming though.
Just breathe, Lily.
Hopefully he’d get her pills for her soon, although she was starting to wonder if she really wanted to take them again. Sure, it made life easier if she didn’t have to think or worry. But did that make things better? Or was she just wimping out?
Lily headed down the stairs and into the kitchen where she could hear noises.
Harvey was standing at the stove. Turning, he studied her and satisfaction filled his face. “Good, they fit. Although I feel like you’ve lost weight. Were you restricting your food intake? You said that you hadn’t eaten pasta in a long time.”
She guessed that she had stopped eating everything that she really loved because of her mother and the comments she would make. She’d always been happiest when Lily was small. So Lily had done whatever she needed to do to keep herself thin, including giving up pasta.
But it hadn’t been like she’d had much of an appetite anyway. The numb helped with that.
Lily shrugged. “I just ate whatever she gave me and didn’t ask for more.”
“What about when you’re eating out? What about with Rick? He took you out to eat, right?”
“Sure. He liked me thin as well, I guess.” At least he never seemed to care what she ate. But then she never ordered anything other than salads. Maybe if she’d ordered a giant steak or a lasagna, he might have said something.
Then again, he would have had to notice her to care, wouldn’t he?
“I don’t think he ever noticed what I ate. Or cared.”
Frowning, he walked over and placed a hand on the small of her back, leading her to a stool at the island.
“That’s not happening here, understand? You eat as much of anything that you like.”
He’d said something similar last night, so she just nodded. He set a full breakfast out in front of her, and her stomach turned slightly. She wasn’t sure that she could deal with that much food.
Especially as her stomach was a bit sensitive this morning.
“What’s wrong? You don’t like any of this?” he asked.
“No, no, it all looks good,” she said hastily, not wanting to insult him. “My stomach’s just a bit off this morning, is all.”
And for some reason, she was starting to shake. She didn’t know what was going on. “I don’t really feel that good.”
“You don’t look that great either.” To her shock, he placed the back of his hand over her forehead. “You’ve got a bit of a fever.”
Great. On top of all the other shit in her life, now she was sick? Would crap ever stop piling on her? How was that fair?
There was something else tugging at her brain. There was something she needed to ask him. But she just couldn’t seem to hold on to one thought at a time.
Her teeth started to chatter. “W-what’s wrong w-with me?”
“I don’t know, baby, but I think we better get you back to bed and get Michaela over here.”
Who was Michaela, and why did she feel a surge of jealousy at the thought of him having another woman here?
“Who is she?” she asked.
Well, it came out more like a demand.
Oops.
To his surprise, he grinned. “Are you jealous?”
“Why would I be jealous?”
“Michaela is the doctor I employ. And you have no reason to feel jealous about her. You’re the only woman in my life.”
Urgh. There was no way that she should feel any happiness at that. She wasn’t his woman. He was completely delusional.
And yet, she couldn’t help but feel relieved that this Michaela didn’t mean anything to him.
Messed up didn’t even cover the state of her mind.