Chapter 11
CHAPTER 11
SAVANNA
“Sweet or spicy?”
Something about the way that Nate is looking at me has my stomach flipping with excitement. It’s been forever since I’ve flirted with a man. Flirting with Preston felt forced instead of playful, so I never reciprocated, or gave him much attention. By the time I left Vincent and Colorado, it had been years since we’d flirted. When I was with him I didn’t dare do anything that resembled flirting with another man for fear of him finding out. If he even thought I was looking at someone else I would pay for it later.
So it’s been a while. And I find that I really want to flirt with Nate. There’s something about him, something about the way all three of these men are interacting with each other that makes me feel safe enough to be bold. It could be my lack of human interaction talking, but I really think it’s more than that. I can see the brotherly bond between them, and it reminds me of home, and of a familiarity that I haven’t felt in half a year.
In the dim light I can see that Nate’s eyes have darkened, their focus intently on me, watching my every move. It’s exhilarating, and I can feel the energy bouncing between us across the bar.
I lick my lips, keenly aware of his eyes darting down to follow the move. “What if I want a little bit of both?”
His eyes shoot back to mine, his nostrils flaring. I wonder if his heart is beating as fiercely as mine.
“It would be a pleasure to give you exactly what you want,” Nate tells me, his voice low and gravelly, the sound of it reverberating in my lower belly. My eyebrows raise in challenge, our eyes locked in a heated exchange that has my pulse fluttering out of control.
“You guys keep eye fucking each other like that, I’m gonna need to take my shirt off with how hot it’s getting in here,” Liam says from my left.
“Shut up, Liam,” Nate says, his eyes never leaving mine.
“I’m just saying, you could cut the sexual tension with a spoon right now. I feel like I’m about to watch live porn.”
I finally break our staring match to look at Liam, a grin spread wide across my face. “I hate to disappoint, but I’m not that kind of girl.”
“The porn kind?” Liam asks, pointing his bottle at me before turning it towards Nate. “That’s a good thing cause Nate wouldn’t go for a porn star.”
“That’s more Liam’s style,” Brody says from the other side of Liam, and we all laugh.
I might not know these guys beyond this exchange, but I already like them. Nate felt he had to warn me, and I’m glad he did, but I didn’t need it. They remind me of my own brothers, Connor and Devin, and how they would poke fun at each other, and at me, whenever they had the chance. It makes a pang of longing go through my chest and my jubilant mood dives for a second before I push the feelings away to focus on the present.
Liam shrugs, flashing an impish grin, not denying Brody’s claim, which makes me giggle. I wonder if he would actually go for a porn star, but I don’t ask. Heck, for all I know, he’s already had one.
“What kind of girl would Nate go for then?” I ask curiously, doing a double take when I glance at Nate.
He’s closing a cocktail shaker, his eyes trained on what he’s doing, but I can tell he’s listening closely to the conversation between Liam and me. I’m not sure what he’s making, or how he did it without me realizing, but I’m a little disappointed that I missed him in action up until now.
His hands are nimble and swift as he opens the shaker after his concoction is mixed and pours the liquid into a two-ounce shot glass rimmed with salt, or sugar, I can’t tell which. He looks skilled at what he’s doing, and it’s kind of hot.
Once the orange-colored shot is in front of me, his eyes meet mine, and his smile is sinfully sexy and mischievous. Slowly his eyebrows raise in challenge.
I want to ask him what’s in it, but I don’t because I feel like it would give him some kind of satisfaction, and I don’t want him to have that just yet. We’ve challenged each other, and now we’re in this dance that’s fun and suggestive. Admitting I wasn’t paying attention at a crucial moment feels like it would have the bubble bursting.
Taking the shot glass, I lift it towards my lips. First, I take in the smell. The tequila hits me immediately, but a second later the fruitiness of mango touches my nose, followed by something that makes it tickle. Sticking my tongue out, I taste the rim of the glass, sweetness exploding across my tongue.
I’m about to throw it back when Nate stops me. He bends down behind the bar and when he pops back up, he sets a beer in front of me. With a smirk, he explains, “In case you need a chaser.”
My eyes narrow before I throw my head back, my eyes never leaving him as the liquid enters my mouth. Sweetness slides down my throat, but there’s a heat right behind it that makes my mouth tingle in the most delicious way.
“Mmm,” I murmur, my tongue sliding along my lips as I set the shot glass down. “Just the way I like it. Screw the chaser.”
I can feel all three pairs of male eyes on me. Under most circumstances I would feel apprehensive about that, but with these guys I don’t, and I’m not sure why. They’re all insanely strong, I’m sure, given that they’re firefighters. I know firsthand how strong Nate is, which means they could all crush me without a second thought.
Instead, I feel safe. I’ve just done a shot, something that will no doubt knock down a few inhibitions and defenses, and I’m not even breaking a sweat over it. I’m not worried about what could happen. I’m not worried about saying or doing the wrong thing, or how someone might react to it. It’s been a long time since I’ve felt at ease around people that aren’t my family, and it feels better than I can describe.
“You.” Liam’s voice pulls me out of my thoughts, and I glance at him, the burning in my mouth slowly starting to subside. I must look confused because he elaborates, “You’re the type of girl Nate would go for.”
I give a short burst of laughter, looking between Liam and Nate. “Nate doesn’t even know me,” I tell Liam, feeling the slightest bit of unease.
I can’t be the type of girl that Nate goes for. I have way too much baggage. Between not having a job, not having a place to live at the moment, and of course the biggest problem of running from my ex, my life is a mess. The man has already been so good to me that even if I really, really want to be his type, I need to look out for both of us. Even if he didn’t care about the job or housing situation, I couldn’t put him in a position where he might be in danger if Vincent were to find me. It’s why I’ve isolated myself for so long, and it’s why I need to continue to remain on my own.
“And yet,” I hear Nate say. I look to him and find him looking pensive, and I know he’s thinking about how we went for brunch this morning, how he’s invited me to stay the night in his home, and how he’s feeding me once again.
I give him a warm, grateful smile. And yet I find myself not wanting to do anything on my own while this man is around. “And yet he knows more about me than anyone else in this city.”
“There’s a story there,” I hear Liam murmur to Brody.
At least I think it’s to Brody. I’m not entirely sure since I’m too busy looking at Nate who is studying me curiously, questions in those bright blue eyes. I told him I didn’t really know anyone in Santa Rosé, and I’m sure he’s remembering that part of our earlier conversation.
“Why don’t we all order dinner, grab a booth, and you guys can tell us all about it,” Liam suggests.
Nate’s eyes shift to him for a second, and then back to me, asking me silently if I’m okay with that idea. He doesn’t want to pressure me into having dinner with his friends, something I’m thankful for, but I’m enjoying their company, and I think it’ll give me more insight into who Nate is. Despite the fact that I shouldn’t be interested—I have no business liking a man right now, and I don’t want to lead Nate on—I want to get to know him better. Besides, I’m going to be staying in his house tonight, and I should probably know a little about him for me to do that.
At least it seems like a good justification.
“Sure. What’s good?” I ask, and the four of us order dinner before we grab one of the booths that line the same wall as the main door of the place.
I squeeze in on one side with Liam across from me, Brody beside him, and Nate taking up space beside me. We took one of the extra-long booths, one that can fit six but comfortably seats three firefighters and me, and I can still feel the heat coming off Nate’s body beside mine. The air between us feels charged, like it’s ready to snap and crackle the second one of us looks at the other, or gets too close, threatening to touch.
“So, how did this all come about?” Liam asks, gesturing between Nate and me. “And don’t tell me that Nate pulls you out of a burning building and asks you out to dinner because I won’t believe it.”
I turn to look at Nate at the same time he’s glancing in my direction. His eyes tell me that he’s just as aware of me sitting next to him as I am of him, and I need to suck in a deep breath to keep my thoughts clear of things like moving closer to him, touching him, or wanting to kiss him.
He’s got fantastic lips, the bottom one just a tad fuller than the top one, and I’m pretty sure they would feel incredibly sweet and soft if they were on mine, just like the man himself. Or maybe they would be hard and commanding, more like the man I met at the fire, ordering his men around, determined to get me out of the building safely. Then I realize I think he would be both, remembering the shot he made me, which causes me to lick my lips while I’m still staring at his.
Shit. I shouldn’t stare. My eyes pop back up to his and I can see his have darkened again as he watches me. I’m pretty sure all the guys are waiting for me to say something, but my ability to think like a rational human seemed to go out the window the second I looked at Nate’s lips. Distraction can be a bitch.
“Please tell me you’re seeing this,” Liam says.
“I’m not blind, dude,” Brody replies, “Just not as vocal as you.”
It’s enough for me to pull my eyes away from Nate, shaking my head to clear the thoughts of lips, kisses, and wanton eyes. “What was the question?”
Brody snorts and Liam smirks, gesturing once again between Nate and me, this time with his beer bottle. “You two. How’d you hook up?”
“We haven’t hooked up,” Nate corrects quickly, his tone hard and unyielding, a clear warning to Liam.
He’s taken the ribbing that Liam has been feeding him since we got here, but I can tell by his tone that he’s drawing a line. It makes butterflies erupt in my stomach, making me feel safe and respected, a feeling I haven’t felt with many men besides my brothers and dad. I realize that since the first time I met him he’s made me feel at ease, though I didn’t recognize it in the elevator the other day. I was far too irritated with men in general to see much of anything.
“And we didn’t meet at the fire,” I tell the two men across from us. “We actually met the day before in an elevator.”
Liam chokes on the beer he’s currently drinking, and I know I’m damn lucky I’m not wearing it when he covers his mouth with a hand, liquid sliding out from under it. His eyes dart between Nate and me, wide with what I think is shock. Brody whistles low between his teeth, his eyes focused on Nate, subdued surprise etched in his features. Based on their reactions, I’m gathering Nate told them about our interaction.
“You’re elevator girl?” Liam says, incredulous, his eyes settling on me while grabbing a napkin.
I feel my cheeks heat, and dare a glance at Nate, making sure I don’t look at his mouth. “You told them about that?”
Nate shrugs, his neck redder than his face. “I didn’t think I would see you again,” he says by way of explanation. “And I only told him,” he adds, pointing to Liam. “He just has a big mouth.”
“You say that like you wouldn’t have told Brods,” Liam says, slinging an arm around the other man. “Don’t leave the big lug out like that. It’ll hurt his feelings. Right, Brods?”
For such a quiet, reserved guy, he sure has expressive eyes. They turn on Nate, and I nearly “aww” at the puppy dog look in them, like he’s truly hurt that Nate wouldn’t tell him about our interaction. I suddenly wonder if Nate should have warned me more about Brody than Liam. It’s always the quiet ones you need to watch out for, and I feel like Brody is proving that right now. The two of them are probably a lethal combination for the ladies.
“Jesus, you two,” Nate mutters, scrubbing his hands over his face and then through his hair.
His clear irritation makes me giggle and I throw a shoulder into his side to tell him it’s okay. It’s the wrong move because I’m suddenly acutely aware of him, even more than before, and how solid and hot his body is. An image of him moving above me flashes in my mind and I press my thighs together instinctively, need washing over me.
I can feel his eyes on me again, watching, and I chance a glance up at him, inhaling sharply at the look I see in his eyes. The same need I feel is reflected back to me, and if we were anywhere but in a very public place with his two best friends watching us, I would say to hell with all my baggage and fling myself at him to find out exactly what those lips would do.
I don’t understand what it is about him that’s making me react to him like this. Sure, I’ve lacked in the personal relationships department for the last six months, but that doesn’t explain this reaction. I was lacking when I accepted a date with Preston, and I never behaved like this or had thoughts of wanting to throw myself at him.
Nate is different. I don’t know why, but he is. My body’s reaction to him is proof enough of that, even if I don’t understand it.
Damn it. I know by the end of tonight I’m going to want to call Maddie to tell her all about this. There’ve only been a few instances since moving to Santa Rosé that I’ve desperately felt the need to call her and gush about an experience—something I’ve probably subconsciously set up for myself—and this is definitely going to be one of them. She would help me understand exactly what’s going on, and why I want to throw all caution to the wind and mold myself to this sexy as hell firefighter.
“Okay, before you two go eye fucking each other further—Savanna is the girl from the elevator? The one that thinks men are filthy, disgusting pigs?” Liam says, recovered from the initial shock of this information.
And damn it, I knew I hadn’t heard the last of that line. Groaning, I pull my eyes away from Nate and pick up my beer, taking a pull from it.
“If you’d just walked in on someone you’d gone on a few dates with screwing the newest intern while you were with clients, you’d think the same thing,” I tell him, and he cringes. “Especially when that someone is your boss.”
“Oh shit,” Brody mutters, and I cringe, nodding, telling them the same story I told Nate earlier today about Preston.
I end up telling them a bit about working at a wealth management firm, and how my summer was spent at the beach. They have me opening up in a way I haven’t with anyone in this city. I share that I’m from Colorado and when they ask about the mountains, I tell them how magical they are, especially after a fresh snowfall, but how the ocean is better, and that I couldn’t imagine not living near it again.
Liam asks why I left home in the first place, but all I say is I needed a change. I don’t tell them I left one day without telling a soul besides my best friend, or that I left because I was finally done putting up with abuse.
Even though I don’t share those details, I talk and share more of myself with these men than I have with anyone in the last six months, and the more I say, the lighter I feel until it seems like I’m floating on cloud nine. This is the connection I’ve been missing. The human interaction that I’ve craved so badly. It helps that these three are attentive listeners, and ask questions.
The longer I sit with them, the more I’m reminded of my own family. There’s a genuineness about them that I haven’t encountered since the last time I had family dinner. It makes my heart both ache and rejoice at the same time. A feeling of homesickness and belonging washing over me time and again in their company.
“Orders up, Nate,” Bryn says, suddenly appearing next to the table. She’s balancing a tray of full glasses, on her way to a table with them.
Nate nods and starts slipping out of the booth from beside me and I’m quick to follow suit. “I’ll come help.”
“I can handle it,” he says, turning to look at me.
“Nate, please.” I give him a chastising look. “You’re feeding me and giving me a place to stay, this is the least I can do.”
“Whoa, what?” Brody pipes up from across the table, and my head snaps in his direction, catching sight of Liam as well.
Shit.
They both look bewildered at this new development. I hadn’t considered them when it came out of my mouth, and I toss Nate an apologetic look. I didn’t want to say anything if he didn’t want to, but he’s looking at me with a smirk that says, “You got yourself into this mess, get yourself out.”
“Or you can stay and explain that,” he suggests with a laugh.
“You should do that,” Liam says, followed by Brody who adds, “I agree.”
“Not a chance.” I leave them both hanging, scrambling the rest of the way out of the booth to follow Nate to the kitchen. “I am so sorry. I didn’t even think before I said that.”
“Nothing to be sorry about,” he says, holding the swinging door open for me to follow him through. “They’d find out eventually, anyway. I didn’t want to tell them anything you weren’t comfortable with, though. Figured I’d follow your lead on all this.”
“Oh.” I stop at the pass where our four plates are sitting. “Well I think everyone should know how generous you are, so I don’t mind telling them I’m staying with you tonight.”
“Liam will take it wrong,” Nate replies distractedly, his eyes taking in the chaos of the kitchen.
“Then we’ll just have to set him straight,” I respond, laying a hand on Nate’s arm to draw his attention back to me, his warmth seeping into my fingertips. “Why don’t you let me take care of our food, and you take care of that.” I nod towards the two cooks who look extremely busy.
“I can handle it,” he tells me again, and I smile simply at him.
“I’m sure you can, but why not let me help so you can deal with your business? Remember the whole ‘I’ll jump in if they need me’ thing? It looks like they could use your help.” I spot a serving tray on another counter behind us and grab it, bringing it over to the pass to load up our plates. I can feel Nate’s eyes on me, suspicious as he watches what I’m doing, and I laugh. “Relax. I served all through college. I’m a pro at this.”
“Leave mine,” he tells me before I can pick it up. “I’ll leave it under the heating lamps until I can make it back to the table. You sure you’re going to be okay?”
I don’t think he’s talking about the plates of food I’m about to lift, and I give him an encouraging smile that I hope doesn’t show any of the uneasiness I’m feeling. Liam and Brody have made me feel comfortable, but I’m about to go in there with them wanting answers to questions for which I have no answers. I don’t want them to think I’m using Nate, or taking advantage of him. Or worse, leading him on when I can’t give him anything more than friendship.
Despite the growing attraction that seems to be reciprocated.
“I got this.”
Lifting the tray, I give him one last smile before I’m headed back to the table where the two men sit, nursing their beers. Liam’s the first to spot me, which doesn’t surprise me, and he elbows Brody who turns to look my way.
I set the tray down and pick up the first plate, handing it to Liam.
“Dinner is served, guys,” I say because they’re both too silent for my liking.
“He giving you a job too?” Liam asks, and my eyes snap to his, certain I’ll see contempt in the brown depths.
There’s none there, though; he’s just looking at me inquisitively, trying to figure it all out, and when I look at Brody, he’s wearing a similar expression. Neither of them look like they’re judging me, or that they’re worried I’m taking advantage of their friend, and I could sag with relief over that.
“No,” I say softly, dishing out Brody’s plate and then mine. I slide back into the booth. “They just got kind of busy in there so he’s helping out for a few minutes.”
I drop the serving tray to the bench beside me and take a deep breath, eying them both with resolve. It’s better to get the questions out of the way before I dig into my dinner. They both got distracted earlier, asking me about Preston, and then Colorado, and my time in Santa Rosé over the summer. Now I take the opportunity to fill them in on the day Nate and I have had.
When I’m finished, I’m filled with relief that neither of them is looking at me any differently. There’s no disdain in their eyes, no suspicion narrowing their gazes. Nothing but the same two friendly faces that I’ve been looking at all evening.
But my relief is short-lived.
“He likes you,” Liam says, in the most serious tone I’ve heard since I met him.
I shake my head, picking up my burger. I had one at brunch, but I have a thing for burgers and fries. They’re my number one comfort food, and after the last couple of days I’m definitely seeking comfort. “He doesn’t know me.”
“You haven’t been sitting where we’re sitting all night,” Brody says, and I look up in surprise to see him wiping his hands with his napkin, his dark eyes focused on what he’s doing. For him to voice an opinion before Liam can jump in is astonishing, which makes me want to pay close attention.
“There are varying degrees of like, Savanna. Just because he doesn’t know you well doesn’t mean he doesn’t know to like you. Sometimes it’s a feeling you don’t understand, but you know is true.” His eyes slowly rise to look at me and I swallow hard at the honesty in them. “What I know to be true is that I haven’t seen Nate look at a woman the way he looks at you in a very long time.”
“If ever,” Liam adds in a mutter.
“Why are you guys telling me this?” I ask, slightly irritated that they’re divulging Nate’s secrets and what it’s doing to me, and my resolve about not leading him on. I can’t get involved with this man. I don’t even know him.
I set my burger—the one I haven’t even taken a bite out of—back down on my plate with a frown of frustration. Continuing, my voice rises with each word, “As his friends aren’t you supposed to keep stuff like that close to the chest? It’s not like we’ve even been on a date. It’s not like we can go on a date. I don’t know him. I just got out of something. And even if I hadn’t, my life is a mess right now. I have no job, no apartment, hell, I don’t even have my own clothes!”
“Douchebag bosses don’t count as getting out of something,” Liam scoffs, and I wish that’s what I had meant when I said that, but I don’t correct him. He nudges Brody with his elbow. “I think she likes him back.”
I huff when Brody nods his agreement, and then nearly jump out of my skin when Nate slides into the booth next to me asking, “Who likes who back?”
My eyes plead to both of them to keep their mouths shut, and I nearly lunge across the table at Liam when I see his eyes fill with mischievousness, taunting me from where he sits. I suddenly understand the warning that Nate gave me when we first got here. I thought I could handle Liam, but I haven’t even known him for a few hours and I’m contemplating murder if he opens his mouth.
“The couple at the bar,” Brody says casually and my eyes dart to him, gratitude evident. “We were debating if she’s falling for whatever he’s saying.”
When Nate looks in that direction, Brody shoots me a wink and I grin at him. I think being the strong, silent type offers Brody the perspective of observing everything going on around him and he picks up on things that most of us don’t. That’s definitely working in my favor right now as the big man comes to my rescue.
Glancing at Liam, I stick my tongue out in victory, and he rewards me with a laugh.
The rest of dinner goes by with the guys asking me more questions, some of which I answer, some of which I dodge, and me asking some in return, most of which involve firefighting. We laugh and talk like we’ve all been friends for years, which I learn the three of them have been, so I’m the odd duck out, but they don’t make me feel like it at all. I don’t remember the last time I felt so included in a social situation that didn’t involve my brothers and Maddie back home.
“Let me get those,” I tell Nate as he starts piling the dishes to clear them from the table.
He gives me a quick shake of his head. “I’ve got it.”
“I need to use the bathroom anyway. I’ll drop them off when I go by,” I tell him, pushing my body against his to get him out of the way, ignoring the heat that rushes through me at the contact. “Besides, it’s your turn in the hot seat with Riggs and Murtaugh.”
“Boo! Hiss!” Liam glowers at me. “We’re firemen, not donut loving glory hunters!”
I walk away with the dishes, laughing all the way to the kitchen over the three scowling men I leave behind. My belly is full, and my mind feels hazy, thanks to a shooter and a couple of good beers, and better company. My soul feels like it’s had a dose of medicine that I didn’t know it needed.
For the first time since I moved to Santa Rosé I have a sense of belonging, which baffles me a little. It’s not like I know these guys very well, but they’ve made me feel right at home. Maybe it’s easy for me to get swept away in those feelings because it’s been so long since I’ve felt them, and maybe I’m letting my guard down a little bit because of it, but it feels so good that I can’t help myself.
At least not for tonight.
For tonight I’m just going to count my blessings, that despite being out of a job, and out of my home, I have somewhere to go, and someone who cares that I’m okay.
When I get back to the table, Nate slides over to where I was sitting, and I slide in next to him. The three of them are quiet, all eyes turned on me, and I look down to make sure I haven’t spilled something on my top, forgotten to pull my pants up, or something else ridiculous like that.
“What? Why are you all looking at me like that?” I ask, picking my cuticle self-consciously.
Nate levels me with a serious look, lips pursed in thought, his fingers tapping on the side of his beer bottle. I feel like whatever he’s about to say is going to carry a great deal of weight, and I’m not wrong when he asks, “How would you like to come work for me?”