Twelve Peace
Osiris
As comfortable as it is in her bed I wake up multiple times throughout the night.
I thought what I got used to in prison was peace when I compared it to my previous home life, but here... lying next to a beautiful woman with nothing but the faint hum of the fan and her soft breathing filling the silence I know I’ve never felt anything of the sort.
The bed is too soft, the pillows too perfect, and it’s too quiet. Those are things I’ve craved my whole life, yet now that I have them I feel myself jerk awake once an hour like my body still hasn’t left fight mode. I haven’t even been out a full week so I know I’m still adjusting, I just thought I’d be able to get out of my head when I finally found this level of comfort.
Surprisingly, it’s hard to feel like I deserve it.
I know I do. Being a convicted criminal doesn’t mean I don’t deserve happiness — hours of therapy behind bars has drilled that into my mind, but with how solemn and negative it is in there, it’s really hard to remember that sometimes.
Aside from that, I still haven’t told her the full truth. I didn’t lie about how I got arrested, but that doesn’t mean she knows everything, and the things she doesn’t know yet are the things I know are going to ruin this.
I just want to be happy for a little while.
Pushing all that from my mind, I manage to get about three consecutive hours of rest before I feel myself begin to wake. The sex dream I have lingers into consciousness, and when her scent hits my nose I imagine rolling over and just sinking inside of her where I belong. Immediately, I realize how hard I am in my hand.
Sleeping with a grip on my junk is a habit I’ve had since going to prison, but it gave me a small sense of security after my first cellmate tried to cop a feel. Some of the OG’s in there had my back and made him regret it, but it still made me feel better at night knowing whatever sicko I was bunked with would have to move my hand to touch me.
Now it’s just a habit.
I don’t want her to see me with a boner yet though, so as hard as it is I stop myself from stroking like I want to and open my eyes to scope her out — only to find her staring straight at me.
Shit.
Has she looked down?
“Morning.” I offer her a flirty smile to try and distract her just in case, which only seems to deepen the blush on her cheeks. God, she’s cute when she’s flustered.
“Hi. Did you sleep okay?” Her eyes dart to the side quickly like she’s trying not to look down, and it takes everything in me not to reach out and pull her to me.
“Yeah, I slept okay.” She doesn’t need to know about the hours I struggled. The last half of the night was the best sleep I’ve had in a long time. “You?”
“Fine.” She nods a little, sitting up and fixing her twisted t-shirt. “About the same as usual.”
The second she glances away, I try to adjust my cock and flatten it down as I sit up, but based on the blush that’s still lingering on her cheeks, I have a feeling she saw. “Any chance you remember your dreams?”
“Nope. You? Did you have any good ones this time?” A little unabashedly, she stares right at my cock. “Or is that normal?”
Well shit.
Chuckling, I shrug. “Both. Morning wood is pretty standard, but so are sex dreams for me.” It’s the only way I get some. I don’t say that though, I’m trying to play it cool here. “You ever made love on the back of a dinosaur?”
Her lips part slightly as her morning brain tries to work out if I’m insulting her or not. “No, I can’t say I have.”
“We should try it.” Since the cat’s out of the bag, I stand up and stretch without shame, watching her watch me, and smiling internally at the fact that my cock has mostly gone down. She still gets a little preview of what I’m packing though, and I move past her to go wash up in the bathroom before she gets her feet moving.
When I return, I drop down to do my pushups while she takes over the bathroom for so long I find myself wondering what she’s doing in there. When she joins me again I’ve already moved on to sit ups. “So where do you usually work at? Here or the living room?”
“My office is in the living room. Are you hungry or anything? I don’t have a lot of groceries but we could order something.”
“Yeah, actually. I’m usually already up and fed, so I’m pretty hungry. I have a little cash to help if you want to order something. I’m not picky, just whatever you think is really good and I should try.”
She waves me off about the cash and orders some of the best breakfast bowls I’ve ever had, but then disappears into the living room like I’m not even here at all. It’s honestly kind of funny how set in her ways she is.
I don’t know what I expected, but after living with a very strict routine in prison, I thought everyone on the outside did whatever the hell they wanted whenever they wanted. In theory they can, but she lives her life a little closer to what I’m used to. It’s actually pretty comforting.
Right now I’d be working though, so seeing her type away on her computer has me feeling a little out of place. I don’t want to be a mooch, and if she’s going to refuse the little bit of money I have for food, I have to find another way to help.
I don’t want to interrupt her though, so I find myself pacing her living room back and forth for a while as I wait for her to naturally give me attention.
Gradually, the mouse clicks get louder, a little more aggressive.
“Si,” she says finally. “I like the hardwood in here. Why are you trying to pace your way clear through it? Are you okay?”
Oops.
“My bad, beautiful. I was just getting a little walk in. Didn’t really have space or treadmills inside, so I got used to pacing certain areas. What are you doing? When’s your break? What do you usually do on break?”
I move over to see her screen better, but it all looks like gibberish to me. “Honestly I don’t normally take one. I eat at my desk and leave early instead of clocking out for lunch.”
“Really? Doesn’t that kind of make you want to punch the screen by the end of the day?”
She shrugs. “It’s better than clocking out for thirty minutes to stare at the wall.”
“You can stare at me. I don’t mind.” I smile down at her when she side eyes me, then back up to give her a little space. “You need me to do anything around here? When’s the last time you changed these smoke detector batteries?”
She lets out an exasperated huff, but she can’t hide the smile behind it. “The neighborhood is nice, why don’t you go for a walk? It’s basically a big circle so I doubt you’ll get lost.”
She just kicked me out in the nicest way possible. Why is that cute? “Yes, ma’am. I’ll go on a walk. I’m not gonna scare your neighbors, right? I look nice enough.”
Eyeballing me, she nods. “You look fine. You might make a few of them drool, but who can blame them?”
Slowly, I walk over to her again and place a kiss on her cheek. “I’ll let them know I’m taken.”
I leave before she can say anything back, and as I stand in her front yard I take a moment to appreciate the beauty of outside.
The yard was bleak at best in prison, so even though I had time in the yard it didn’t feel anything like this. There aren’t any fences to remind me of my sins, no guards waiting for a reason to put me in my place, and even better there aren’t any angry men eying me like they want nothing more than to skin me alive. There’s just an old couple sitting on their porch a few houses down, and when I wave at them they seem genuinely happy when they return the gesture. I don’t have a lot of friends, so something as simple as that has me walking over to greet them properly and begin my walk around the block.
I may not know what I’m doing with my life yet, but the way I feel right now has me excited for whatever’s to come.
I’ll figure out my path eventually.