straight red
THE SMALLEST MAN WHO EVER LIVED BY TAYLOR SWIFT
The training facility is quiet. The only sound is the echo of my heels in the empty hallway as I head out from my office. I stopped in on the way to the awards party to drop off some paperwork to Alan.
I turn the corner as I step out of the elevator, and waiting in the lobby is Matt.
Why is he here?
Why is he always here?
He’s dressed for the awards dinner in a dark suit, blacker than his soul, if he even has one. He straightens when he sees me, eyes dragging over my dress, and I immediately wish I could melt into the floor and disappear.
“Well, damn,” he says, soft and smug. “You look beautiful.”
I try to step past him. “I’m running late.”
He steps sideways, blocking me without even looking like he’s trying.
“Addison, come on. The season’s practically over. You’ve made your point, haven’t you? It’s time to stop playing games.”
I stiffen. “This was never a game, Matt.”
“Sure,” he says, like he doesn’t believe me. “You proved whatever you felt like you needed to prove, Addison.” He gestures vaguely toward the hallway leading to the locker room. “You worked. You survived without me. Gold star.”
“Survived?” I scoff. “I succeeded.”
I start to move past him again, but he steps in front of me and lowers his voice.
“Come home, Addison.”
“What?”
“I’ll be better this time. I will.” His eyes flick to my dress again, and he can’t even hide the possessive hunger showing in his expression. “You’re mine. We’re good together. No one knows you like I do.”
“You don’t know me at all,” I say, laughing bitterly.
“Yes, I do,” he insists, a flash of annoyance curling at the edge of his mouth.
“No.” I shake my head slowly, letting the word sink in, because he’s not used to hearing it.
“You used to know me. You knew the girl who was afraid, who kept her head down and made herself small for your sake. Look at me,” I say, stretching my arms wide open, letting the space around me fill with my presence. “She’s not here anymore.”
He stares at me, and his expression hardens. He doesn’t like this version of me—the one who sees him clearly and isn’t afraid to say it.
“Addison, please.” His voice is low as his hand closes around my arm. It’s not tight, but it’s firm enough to stop me from moving. Firm enough to make my blood run cold for just a second, until I remember I’m not the girl who used to shrink under that touch.
I snap.
I snap so hard I don’t even think. I just let every feeling I’ve swallowed for years detonate.
“You’re pathetic,” I spit, voice trembling, not from fear, but from fury. From everything I’ve never said. “You are the smallest man I have ever known, Matt.”
He blinks, caught off guard by the venom in my voice, but I’m not done.
“You chipped away at me,” I continue, each word sharper than the last. “Every time you hurt me. Every condescending word. Every lie. Every time you humiliated me in public, every time you gaslit me in private. Every time you made me feel like I was too much, or not enough, or somehow even both at the same time. You took pieces of me, and I let you. I let you break me down because I didn’t realize I could fight back. ”
He shifts, mouth parting like he’s about to cut in, but I don’t give him the chance.
“You took pieces of me until there was nothing left. I didn’t recognize myself anymore.
I didn’t even like myself.” My voice drops, steadier, stronger.
“But I built myself back from the ruins and I will not let you take that away from me. I’m not the girl you hurt.
I’m not afraid of you. I’m not in awe of you. ”
His mouth twists, frustration flickering across his face. “Addison. You know I love you.”
“No,” I hiss, pulling away from him. “You don’t.” He flinches like I decked him, and for a second, I wish I had. “You don’t even know what love is, Matt. You never have.”
His mouth opens, ready to spin more straw into poisonous gold, but I cut him off. I need to say this.
“You called it love when you controlled me. When you made me feel crazy for having needs, for wanting respect. You conditioned me to believe I was hard to love, and that the scraps I got from you were all I deserved, and I was lucky to even be tolerated by you.”
I steady myself. “But being here… working for this team, being surrounded by people who see me, people who show up for each other without keeping score—I’ve realized something. I want more. I deserve more.”
I take a breath, sharp and sure. “You will never know what that kind of love feels like, Matt. You are not capable of giving it, and you sure as hell don’t deserve to receive it.
You are a poor, pathetic excuse for a man, and I hope that someday you feel even half the smallness you tried to make me live in. ”
Matt’s mouth opens again, likely reaching for one more manipulative plea, but instead he just stutters, like I’ve left him speechless. I can tell he wasn’t expecting that. He was expecting tears. Rage. Maybe even regret. But I’m clean now. I scrubbed myself free of him.
I step in close enough that he can see the peace in my eyes, the fire in my spine, and the absence of any love I used to feel for him.
“And as for me?” I say, voice calm, but confident. “I will never think about you again after today.” I pause, and the ghost of a smile tugs at my mouth. “But I’m pretty sure you’ll think about me for the rest of your life.”
I don’t give him another second. I walk away from him. From all of it—the fear, the guilt, and the silence he made me swallow for too long.
I walk out the front doors, not just toward the party, but toward my life.
I’m not broken anymore. I’m free.