Chapter 39
LENNON
Everything hurts and I’m dying.
The thought fluttered through my aching brain before I was fully conscious.
That dull, steady throb was my entire existence.
Maybe I could opt out of being alive for a while.
Come back to life when it didn’t suck so much.
Was unconsciousness really that bad? I pushed back from the pain. The darkness was lovely.
But there was no Jeremiah in the darkness.
I grabbed hold of the pain and dragged myself toward it. My eyelids fluttered but didn’t open. It was like they were glued shut. I tried again. Focused on the pain. Moved toward it.
My eyelids blinked open, scraping against my eyeballs that felt as gritty as if someone had poured a bucket of sand in them. Something fuzzy and purple was under my face. A blanket? No, it was shag carpet. Where was I? It was too dark to see much of anything.
I jerked upright and immediately regretted it. The movement caused pain to sear through me. I screamed and clutched my head. There was a lump near my temple. My hand came away slightly sticky. Blood.
What the fuck was going on?
I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to remember. The kitchen. A man. Had he taken me? No, wait, there was someone else—
A door opened behind me and mellow light illuminated the darkness. “Oh, good, you’re awake.” The familiar female voice was full of relief.
I turned slowly, not making the same mistake twice, and squinted at who stood there. “Cecily?” I croaked. “Are you…are you hurt, too? What’s going on?”
“It’s going to be okay, Lennon. I’m here now. Here, take this.” She handed me two brown pills and an unopened bottle of water. “For the headache.”
Gingerly, I took the pills and water from her and unscrewed the bottle cap. Everything felt surreal. I couldn’t make sense of what was happening.
She peered closer at the crown of my head.
“Yikes, that’s a nasty bump. Sorry about that, and the stun gun.
I really didn’t want to hurt you, but I didn’t have a choice.
Did you know chloroform isn’t like what you see in movies?
It takes a while to take effect. You can’t just plop a chloroform rag on someone’s face and expect them to pass out. Plus, it’s super dangerous.”
I swallowed down the pills with a long gulp of water while she continued her monologue.
“I guess every method of making someone lose consciousness is at least a little dangerous, though. I mean, that guy who attacked you? That was crazy. Boom, dead. Good thing he gave me a chance to practice. I could have accidentally killed you.”
I blinked. Cecily had hit me?
She burst out laughing. “The look on your face. Sorry, I know it’s not funny. I’m a little hyped. All that adrenaline, you know?” She took the bottle back from me and took a sip. At least that meant it wasn’t poisoned? “Who was that guy, anyway?”
“The one who attacked me?” I rubbed my too-dry eyes. “I don’t know for sure, but I suspect it has to do with my ex in New York. He had some shady business dealings.” Benny. Oh, god. Nausea roiled my stomach.
Cecily tsked, shaking her head. “What do I keep telling you, Lennon? You have the worst taste in men. The absolute worst.”
What do I keep telling you?
The puzzle pieces clicked into place.
“It was you all along. You sent me the postcards.”
She laughed. “Of course it was me. But you knew that, right? Deep down, you knew it was me.”
I hoped my thoughts weren’t evident on my face. No, bitch, I didn’t know it was you. If I had, I would have whacked you with a frying pan.
She looked at me with hopeful eyes, waiting.
I knew what she wanted me to say. I was so damn good at that.
Reading people. Telling them exactly what they wanted to hear, even when they didn’t know what that was themselves.
Usually I found a way to shape it into something true.
Sometimes—like with Jeremiah—true was all it was.
With Cecily, I was going to lie my ass off.
“I knew it was a friend,” I said. “I hoped it was you.”
She pressed her hands to her cheeks, her eyes glistening with unshed tears. “I knew you would understand.” With a sniffle, she wiped under her eyes. “Come on. You must be starving.”
I eased carefully out of the van with shaky limbs. We were at a clearing of some sort. Dense forest surrounded us, blocking any kind of view that might have helped me get my bearings. Not that I could tell one jagged peak from another. The only mountain I could recognize was Squaretop.
My chest squeezed.
Jeremiah must be so worried—
Jeremiah. I felt my pockets. No phone. Cecily must have taken it. Feeling her gaze on me, I looked up to find her watching me with narrowed, mistrustful eyes. “My phone! Is it in the van? Jeremiah put a tracker on it. He’ll be able to find us. We can’t stay here.”
Her expression cleared immediately and she smiled. “Don’t worry. I tossed it back at the lodge. He can’t find us.”
Jeremiah can find anything. I had to believe that. I had to trust him. My only job now was to stay alive.
I looked around. “Where are we?”
“Somewhere safe. We can hang out here as long as we want. I have plenty of supplies, and we’re not too far from civilization. We need to avoid the main roads while people are looking for you.”
That was too vague to be helpful, but I nodded.
“Sit.” She pointed to a camp chair by the fire ring. “I’ll make us some dinner.”
I lowered myself into the nylon chair. Cecily bustled around.
Her purple ponytail bounced happily as she boiled water on her pocket stove.
It made me irrationally furious. I wanted to grab hold of it and smash her face into a tree.
Because right now I should be wrapped up in Jeremiah’s arms. But I wasn’t.
I hadn’t even had a chance to tell him I wanted to stay. Not for the summer. Forever.
Everything hurt. But that hurt most of all.
“Here.” Cecily passed me a container of homemade chocolate chip cookies. “A snack to tide you over until the pasta is ready.”
“They’re not poisoned, are they?” Her expression turned furious and I realized my mistake. Friends didn’t poison each other. “Just kidding!” Forcing a light laugh, I shoved half a cookie into my mouth and chewed.
“It’s because of Miguel, isn’t it? That’s why you don’t entirely trust me. I didn’t want to hurt him either, just so you know. I flashed my brights at him thinking he would steer into the ditch, not off the fucking cliff.”
I nearly choked on my cookie. Jesus. She might actually be insane.
“He would have died without me, you know. I went back and saved him because the idiots at the sheriff department wouldn’t do their fucking job.”
I brushed crumbs from my lap, my mind racing. “I guess I just don’t understand why you did it at all. I’ve never even met Miguel.”
“So you could keep working in the kitchen with me. Duh. Amos hates a crowded kitchen. With Miguel back, he would have pushed you to find something else to do with your time.” Cecily dumped a quarter box of pasta into the boiling water.
“I really like Amos, but sheesh. Men get in the way. They’re always trying to take you from me. ”
I mentally sifted through her words, searching for clues. Normally, I knew when someone wanted to fuck me. Hell, I made a living off making people want to fuck me. But I wasn’t getting that vibe from Cecily. Something else was going on here.
Evening faded to night. The stars popped out. A million pricks of light in an inky black canvas.
Back in the van, sharing a lumpy mattress, Cecily gave me an apologetic smile as she handcuffed us together. “I know it’s uncomfortable, but I’m not stupid. Jeremiah has some weird hold on you. Men are like a drug. We keep going back even when they’re killing us. This is for your own good.”
“I understand.” I closed my eyes.
Come find me, Jeremiah.