Chapter Twenty-Three
When her shift ended that day at three thirty, Lark quickly finished her notes, got into her car and drove to Boston. Mass General was offering a grand rounds lecture on new tools that measured residual disease in acute leukemia. If tools like that had been around seven years ago, it was possible that Justin’s leukemia could’ve been caught earlier. He would have had a better chance at…
No. Best not to go there. It didn’t serve any purpose.
She’d texted Heather and Theo after Joy’s party, doing her best to explain that she was being a date—not romantic, of course!—for a surgeon she knew. No girlfriend situation there.
Heather’s response was short and polite. Your mom said as much, but if there was a boyfriend, it would be okay, honey. We don’t expect you to be single forever.
That made her feel worse, somehow. She’d responded by suggesting a date for the missed whale watch (not that she had time for one) and asking Heather what she wanted to do for her birthday in September. In the past, they’d gotten pedicures and had lunch…and gone to the cemetery.
Traffic was not as wretched as usual, and Lark made it to Boston in plenty of time, parked her car in a garage, since she couldn’t trust street parking anymore. She even had enough time to stop at a Roxy’s food truck for a grilled cheese, then ate it as she walked through the Common toward Mass General. Families were out in force, little kids running and shrieking, people walking their dogs, sitting on blankets, eating, laughing. A Boston Fire engine went by, sirens blaring, and she flushed abruptly. Chances were low that Dante was on that one, but it was possible, of course.
It had been two nights since she’d sat in Lorenzo’s kitchen. No communication from any other Santini, though, aside from a text from Izzy about possibly going to a movie sometime before the wedding. That would be nice.
She found herself at a bench she and Justin had frequented in their college days here. They’d brought the Yorkshire Breakfast Hamper to the Common quite often. She sat down and finished her sandwich, feeling a slight melancholy.
She missed Justin. She missed his lovely, gentle smell—pencils and pine needles and rain. She missed his loud laugh, his inky black hair, his eyes crinkling as he looked at her. She missed his weight on top of her; his soft, wonderful lips; the way he called her little bird with such love.
But she was also forgetting him.
Seven years. Seven years. Every day was a step away from their life together. That would never change. She would only get further and further from him. She would never marry him, and oh, God, how she had wanted to be his wife. How she had wanted ordinary days with him. She wasn’t even his widow. She was just someone who used to be a fiancée.
Someone who used to be.
It wasn’t enough anymore. He was gone, and she…she wanted more. Until this summer, she hadn’t been able to picture what that looked like. But pretending to be Lorenzo’s girlfriend had given her a glimpse of the kind of future she’d never been able to picture. Someone’s partner. A sister-in-law. Daughter-in-law. Lorenzo was handsome as anything, but her ovaries hadn’t so much as twitched, given his personality.
Dante…different story. That kiss had made her weak and soft and reminded her that she was a healthy, heterosexual female in prime breeding years. That kiss—both kisses—had made her remember what it felt like to want someone. To feel connected again. The flame that had burned so strong for Justin had finally flickered.
It would be devastating if Lorenzo was right, and Dante had kissed her in some kind of revenge move.
There was one way to find out. But she’d come here for that lecture, so she got up and walked to the hall. For the next hour, she listened to developments in cancer detection tools, taking notes, paying close attention, pulling out her phone to google a few terms she hadn’t heard before.
“We will end cancer in our lifetime,” the guest doctor said at the end. “And you sitting here…you’ll be part of that. It will be the greatest medical breakthrough in human history.”
Everyone clapped, and Lark’s throat felt tight. That had been the goal since Lark was an adolescent. Treat cancer. Stop cancer. Cure cancer. Eradicate cancer. God, she hoped the doctor’s words would be true. But whether or not she’d be part of it…that was flickering, too.
Then she went outside, took a few breaths of the muggy night air, and texted Dante.
Hi, it’s Lark. Are you in Boston? I was wondering if I could talk to you.
Almost immediately, the three dots began waving.
I’m home. You okay?
There was that question again. The immediate concern for her. Yep. Can I pop over?
Of course.
His address appeared on the screen. Her phone said it would take her twenty minutes to get there.
In fact, it took eighteen. His house was rather ordinary, a gray two-family with blue shutters. He greeted her at the door.
“Hey,” he said. His hair was damp, and he smelled like…heaven. His feet were bare. Apparently, he’d just showered. Possibly because she was coming.
“Hi,” she said. “Sorry to just appear like this.”
“No, it’s great. Come on in.”
She followed him into a surprisingly lovely living room—fireplace with built-in shelves encasing it, paneled ceiling, big iron radiators. It was sparsely furnished with a couch, a recliner and a coffee table, a big TV on the wall. To the left was an empty dining room. An arched entryway led to the kitchen.
“Want something to drink?”
“Sure.”
“Water, beer, coffee? I might have a Coke somewhere.”
“Water’s good. Thanks, Dante.”
He left the room, and she went to the fireplace. On the mantel and bookshelves were pictures of his family, and that…that got to her. Little Izzy, Dante and Sofia, first day of school, maybe, all of them with backpacks and lunch boxes, the girls looking very proud, Dante pulling a face. His parents dressed up for a function. An older couple she assumed to be Anita’s parents. The four kids, maybe ten years ago, Dante skinnier, Sofia gorgeous, Izzy in a miniskirt, Lorenzo looking stiff and irritable. A black and white dog chewing on something blue.
“This is a beautiful home,” she said as he came back in.
“Thanks,” he said, not looking at her. “It was built in the twenties. Great craftsmanship back then, you know? It was kind of a pit when I bought it, which is how I could afford it. It’s coming together bit by bit, though.”
“Are you doing it yourself?”
“My dad helps a little, but yeah.” He ran a hand through his hair…a good hand. A big, masculine hand. His tattoo peeked out from under his white T-shirt.
She sat on the couch and set her bag beside her. From upstairs, she could hear a kid laughing, a parent’s voice, more laughter, then the pounding of feet. It made her smile.
“Those are the Grishams,” Dante said, sitting in the chair. “Two kids. They love to run. A lot.” He smiled, his eyes crinkling. “I should’ve put in more insulation.”
“It’s a good sound.”
“Yeah, I think so, too.” He took a sip of water, looking at her. “So what brings you to Quincy, Lark?”
She felt herself blush. “I was in Boston for an oncology lecture, and I thought…I wanted to…you know. Ask you something.” Her face grew hot.
“Fire away.”
She could feel her heartbeat in her throat and wrists. “I was talking to Lorenzo the other day. And he told me…um…well, he told me about Brie, and I was wondering if…you know. If that had anything to do with, um, you kissing me.” Her face blazed.
“Why would Brie have anything to…oh.” He sat back and ran a hand over his face. “Okay, just for the record, you did kiss me first.”
She closed her eyes, grimacing. “I know. I’m sorry.”
“I’m not,” he said easily. “And secondly, no. I wouldn’t do that. I’m not a shitty person.”
“No, of course not. It was just…”
“What did he tell you?”
Lark squeezed her pinkie finger. “That he…never mind. Maybe you guys should talk.”
“No, maybe you should talk, Lark. That was the reason you came here, right? What did he say about Brie?”
She took a breath. “That she made a play for him. That he suspected she wasn’t…well, good enough for you.”
“And did he tell you how he…proved that?”
A sense of dread came over her. “No.”
Dante sat back in his seat. “You should ask your boyfriend for the entire story, Lark.”
“Can you just tell me instead?” she asked. She wished Connery were here. He would definitely lighten the mood.
“I’m not sure you want to know.”
“I do.”
He stared at his hands, clasped loosely together in front of him. “Yeah, okay. You probably should know, since you’re dating him.”
Lark pressed her lips together at the untruth but didn’t say anything.
“So…Brie was—is—very pretty. Lively. Always up for a good time. I loved her, and I wanted to marry her because I’m a dumb fireman who thought that was enough. I brought her home to meet the family, it’s all going great, she likes my sisters, brought wine for my parents. Then Lorenzo pulls up in his asshole car, casually mentions how he bought Mom and Dad their house, practically shows her his tax return. Fine. That’s what he does. We all know him. But for some reason, he doesn’t like her. Tells me she’s gonna break my heart. That she was materialistic and…not nice.”
He stopped for a second and looked out the window, then took a drink of water. “Not what I wanted to hear, obviously. So I told him to mind his own business, whatever. But he was right. Because Brie was a materialistic person without a strong moral compass, and Lorenzo proved this by sleeping with her.”
Lark didn’t move. Her eyes, though, suddenly felt very, very wide. “Say again?”
“Yeah. Brought me her panties as proof and said something like, ‘She’s not very loyal, is she? Sorry to be right.’?”
Horribly, it sounded exactly like him. “Oh, Dante.”
“Yeah. I mean, it was a very convincing presentation, so kudos to him for that. I broke up with her—she didn’t seem to mind—and she went to Lorenzo, who completely blew her off. Then she told me she wanted to get back together. Much to her surprise, I declined the offer. The end.”
“Oh, my God. I’m so sorry.”
Dante was quiet for a second. “The thing is, Lark…he really did think he was doing me a favor. And that I would need something…big…to see her for who she was. I’m not telling you he’s a horrible person. Just that he has a very bad way of…relating to people.”
“You’re defending him?” she asked.
“No. Not really. I mean, I don’t want to trash-talk my own brother. He’s not…well, he got you, so what do I know? Maybe he’s great and I just can’t see it.”
“I’m not really dating him,” she blurted. “I’m just…a prop, sort of. A companion for the wedding and family stuff. We’ve never even kissed.”
He looked confused for a second. Then he tilted his head, and his eyes got a little hard and flat. “You’re not dating him? My whole family thinks…are you serious?”
“I felt really bad about lying to your family,” she whispered.
“Yeah. You should.”
She bit her lip. “He wanted your grandmother to think he had somebody. To be honest, Dante, I think he’s lonely.”
“And whose fault it that?”
“His. As you said. He has a bad way of relating to people. His head is so far up his ass he can’t see how much you all love him.”
Dante looked at her a long second. “Well, that’s one take on it. Jesus. You’ve been lying this whole time?”
She set her water glass down on the table. “Dante, I…I said I’d do it because your grandmother was on hospice. It seemed like her dying wish was for Lorenzo to have someone who loved him. So I said yes. And also because Lorenzo is a little pathetic, you know? He wants so much for you all to be impressed by him and believe he’s got his life together. He thought having me around would…distract from the truth, maybe. That he’s gifted, sure, but has no idea how to connect with people.”
“What’s in it for you? I mean, I find it hard to believe you’d just do this out of the goodness of your heart. It’s a pretty big ruse, and we met you, what? In May? So three months of this, just because?”
“Um…well, he had some contacts in the field I want to work in. I never planned on being in emergency medicine forever.”
“Right. You still want to be an oncologist.” Emotions flickered through his eyes.
“But…well. Never mind.” It didn’t seem right to dump her uncertainties on him.
Dante didn’t say anything for a minute, then stood up. “Well. Nice seeing you, Lark.”
“Are you…are you mad at me?”
He threw up his hands. “Yes! You just told me you’ve been lying to my family for the past couple of months. I’m not happy.”
“But you understand, right?”
“Not really, no.”
“I was trying to do something nice, Dante. That’s all. I got kicked out of my residency. I panicked, and Lorenzo gave me a possible way back in. He went to med school with the head of Dana-Farber. So I said yes, because I thought it would make Noni happy and also because all I was ever supposed to do was become an oncologist.”
“Because of your guy. Justin.”
“Yes. Exactly. And now, I don’t even know if I want that. But I’m not dating your brother. Not at all. And I…I’m starting to…I like you, Dante. A lot.” Her knees ached with nerves, and her heart was thudding against her ribs.
He sighed, then ran a hand through his dark hair. “I’m not really sure what to do with that. But for now, I think you should go.” His voice was gentle, and it made it that much worse.
With that, he walked her out, waited till she was in her car, then closed the door and turned off the porch light.