Chapter 20
After their long journey from Italy, it was up to Lorelei and Aurora to pick Roberto, Pino, and Nadia up from the airport.
Behind the wheel of her father’s car, Lorelei felt shivery and alien, and her voice didn’t sound like her own.
She wished she could project the kind of motherly authority her family needed.
But what was someone supposed to do when they thought their marriage was falling apart?
Aurora kept adjusting her sunglasses and looking over at Lorelei, as though waiting for Lorelei to say what was going to happen next. But all Lorelei knew was that Roberto had something to tell them, something he hadn’t been honest about.
“Whatever happens,” Aurora said suddenly, surprising Lorelei, “we’re still a family.”
Lorelei’s heart leaped. She reached across the console and took her daughter’s hand. “We’re still a family,” she agreed.
She was surprised to find that she really believed it.
At the Nantucket Airport, Lorelei and Aurora waited in the car, watching as tourists streamed out, wheeling their suitcases and waving to family members and friends in expensive cars.
It was hard to believe that Lorelei had been back in Nantucket for most of the year, that her life in Rome now felt like an impossibility, like something that had happened to somebody else.
But now, her handsome Roman husband and two of her children came through the sliding door.
Lorelei got out of the car and threw her arms around Nadia first, who was dressed so sensibly, her hair straightened, her eyes hidden behind sunglasses.
Pino took out his earbuds and hugged her, too. “Mama, ciao,” he said.
“Oh, I missed you,” Lorelei said.
Roberto stood off to the side, his shoulders hunched, as though he didn’t want to be touched. Lorelei told herself not to hug him. She told herself that not only did he not want to, but he didn’t deserve it. “How was the trip?” she asked, taking his suitcase and putting it in the trunk.
“Relatively fine,” Roberto said. “Some turbulence.”
Lorelei nodded. It was a strangely normal exchange.
It occurred to her, as they drove back to the White Oak Lodge, that people talked about inane things all the time, no matter what else was going on. During World War II, people had probably still discussed the weather. They’d probably still done the dishes and the laundry.
Life went on despite everything.
When Lorelei cut the engine in the parking lot of the White Oak Lodge, the five of them sat quietly for a moment. Lorelei wanted to know the logistics. She wanted to know when Roberto planned to tell them whatever it was he needed to say.
“You must be tired,” she said.
“I’m not,” Pino said.
“Me neither,” Nadia offered.
Aurora was quiet, as was Roberto.
“I couldn’t arrange for the suite like last time,” Lorelei said, getting out of the car. She’d booked a single room for Roberto, thinking that he wanted space from her. She’d tell him that later.
“That’s fine,” Roberto said. “We don’t need the suite. It’s so much space.”
Lorelei and Aurora helped them take their bags into the family apartment.
Pino had his own room, while Nadia was going to share with Aurora for the week.
Lorelei studied her daughters’ faces, wondering if they were finally going to bond.
It had never happened before, which felt sad for Lorelei.
After all, Lorelei’s best friend was her sister, Allegra. She couldn’t imagine life without her.
“Let’s have a family meeting in an hour,” Roberto suggested, rubbing the back of his neck.
Their three children turned to look at them. They looked much younger than they were, and frightened. Lorelei’s anxiety spiked.
“Okay,” Nadia said quietly.
“On the beach,” Roberto said, before turning to Lorelei. His eyes looked wounded.
“One hour. On the beach,” Lorelei said. “See you all there.”
Lorelei led Roberto to the room that she’d arranged for him, a single in the lodge portion of the house. He stepped inside, and his eyes fell onto the single bed.
“Let me know if you need anything,” Lorelei said, fleeing before he said anything else. She couldn’t take it.
For the next hour, Lorelei lived in a state of shock.
She walked slowly and ponderously through the Lodge, doing odd tasks and speaking to random tourists about what they’d done so far on the island.
Her voice did not sound like her own. Worst of all, time seemed to speed up as they drew closer to the meeting.
She wanted to tell it to calm down, to allow her a few moments of reprieve.
But already, she found herself pressing open the back door and walking to the beach, where Pino, Aurora, and Nadia were waiting.
For a little while, Lorelei and her three children stood in silence, gazing out across the waves.
Lorelei wondered if Roberto had chickened out.
She wondered if he’d grabbed a taxi back to the airport and fled, wanting to start his new life in Italy with someone else.
But just as she opened her lips to say that it was time for them to go inside, to abandon Roberto and whatever he wanted to tell them, Roberto’s shadow fell over the sand.
They turned to find him, blotchy and sweaty, his hair tousled.
If Lorelei didn’t know any better, she’d say he was sick.
“I’m sorry,” he said. “The jet lag got me. I fell asleep.”
They were quiet. Pino crossed his arms and looked ruefully at his father. Aurora took a small step away from him, as though he were a bomb about to go off.
“Thank you for meeting me here today,” Roberto said. “I recognize that I have not been acting like myself. For years, I haven’t felt like the father you knew.”
Lorelei’s mind tried to fill in the blanks. I haven’t felt like the father you knew because I’m in love with someone else. I haven’t felt like the father you knew because I have a second family in another part of Rome. I haven’t felt like the father you knew because…
But then, Roberto took a breath and said, “I’ve struggled.
Endlessly, I’ve struggled. When your mother and I first opened our restaurant, I was so eager to get into the business side of things.
I hired other chefs so that I could create my vision.
When that first restaurant seemed stabilized, I opened more—in Sicily and on Sardinia.
I thought there was no end to my empire.
Our empire. But things got sticky. Aurora knows this firsthand.
She came into the restaurant and saw what a mess our finances were.
I tried to keep them from you, Lorelei, but…
” He trailed off. “Hiding the truth got easier when you came to Nantucket. I was so happy that you didn’t have to watch me flailing all the time.
I thought maybe I could fix everything while you were here, but I couldn’t… ” He let his arms hang in front of him.
Lorelei squinted at her husband, confused.
“We’re going to lose all of them,” Roberto said finally, mostly to the sand. “I have to close all three of the restaurants. Our work in restaurants is over. I don’t know what else to say. I feel that I’ve failed all of you. I am not the strong husband you married.”
Lorelei’s heart shattered. This was what her husband hadn’t been honest about? His lack of business prowess?
“I should have listened to you, Aurora,” Roberto said. “Maybe I could have saved one of them. But I was too proud. Too arrogant. I’m learning my lessons now.”
Aurora’s face echoed the shock that Lorelei felt. Even Pino and Nadia looked confused.
“Wait,” Nadia interjected. “So you and Mama aren’t getting divorced?”
Roberto’s face went slack. “Divorce? No! No. Never in a million years. Not on my side, anyway.” Roberto reached for Lorelei’s hand and searched her eyes.
“I’ve been distant, yes. But I’ve never stopped loving you, Lorelei, nor any of you, my children.
I hate that I’ve been distant. I hate that this has taken up such a chunk of my heart. I promise you. No more.”
At this, Lorelei threw her arms around her husband. A small sob escaped his throat, but then he held her firmly, like the strong and stoic man she’d always known him to be.
He wasn’t leaving her. He’d never had plans to leave her.
It meant they had a chance at rebuilding from the foundation of their love. It meant they could write a new story—one that had nothing to do with these sad restaurants and their failures. Lorelei didn’t care about any of it. All she wanted was her family.
Eventually, Pino, Aurora, and Nadia joined their hug, and the five of them stood on the beach, their eyes closed and their hearts beating as one.
Very soon, one of them would complain—in an endlessly Italian way—that their stomach was empty.
Very soon, they would be called to the table with Francesca to dine.
“I’m so happy to be here with all of you,” Roberto said gently.
And it was clear, now, that he’d been under tremendous stress. He hadn’t been sleeping. He’d been trying and trying and trying and ruining his health in the process. When their hug broke, Lorelei slipped her hand into his and smiled. “It’s over, now,” she said.
Later, after a feast of tortellini and homemade bread and buckets of red wine, Lorelei led Roberto to her bedroom, rather than the single room she’d booked for him in the Lodge.
Roberto looked tired but happy, filled with food that had been handcrafted and made with love.
Together, they changed into comfortable clothing and sat on the bed, holding one another.
Lorelei couldn’t remember the last time she’d felt so soft and honest with her husband.
She considered all the things she wanted to tell Roberto, as well—about Carter, about Aurora’s confession, about Lorelei’s fear that their marriage was over.
But tonight, she wanted to live in the cushion of their love.
“I’ve been thinking,” Lorelei said, nuzzling the hair on his chest. “Mama isn’t so happy with the chefs we have here at the Lodge.”
“Is that so?” Roberto sounded intrigued.
Lorelei pulled back to look at him. She’d expected him to bat the idea away. She’d expected him to remind her that he was Rome-born and Rome-bred, and he wasn’t going anywhere. But the look in his eye told her that he would consider any avenue forward, as long as it gave him his pride back.
“You would consider it?” She asked. “Working here at the Lodge? Moving here?”
Roberto smiled and kissed the tip of her nose. “I can’t seem to get you to come back to Italy, can I? I guess it means I’ll have to look into immigrating.”
Lorelei threw her arms around him and laughed. Her heart could hardly handle the love she felt for him.