37. Chapter 37
My mind was mush as he kissed me on the lips and then picked me up. Carrying me into the bathroom, I snuggled against him. I couldn’t get the grin off my face. Pasha and me. We fucked. Using the bathroom hurt like hell. But even that couldn’t stop the high I felt.
It was good—no, mind-blowing. It was everything he said it could be, and more. And for once, I didn’t care about anyone back home having a problem with it.
“You’ve got to stop doing these kinds of things to me,” I murmured as he scooped me up and set my feet on the floor in front of the shower.
With one arm around my waist holding me, he turned the water on and adjusted the temperature before gesturing for me to get in.
“What things?” He smirked.
“Exhausting me and making me sore.” I yawned, suddenly more sleepy than I’d ever been. I wobbled a bit, and he was right behind me, bracing my body with his. We stepped into the shower. “And where is the apology for the state of my pussy?”
He shook his head and shrugged. “You said to ruin you. I should probably warn you, too. I’ve only just begun. In fact, if you give me another five minutes, I’ll push you against this wall and take you again.”
I smacked the lion on his chest. He growled and clasped both my hands in one of his. His other hand found one of my nipples and he tweaked it. I moaned embarrassingly loud. He nipped my bottom lip.
“I’m noticing a pattern here. One of aggression. That definitely runs in the family.”
“I am not aggressive,” I fumed.
“Let’s see, you smacked me earlier, twice actually. Then you choked me and now you’re assaulting me. You do realize you have fists formed, right? I’d prefer if you didn’t use them on me.”
I laughed, not realizing I literally had balled my hands into fists.
“But I will say, the choking was hot,” he added.
I rolled my eyes. “I didn’t choke you. Quit exaggerating.”
“I’m not.”
“Liar. Not once did I wrap my hands around your throat.”
“Okay. I’ll give you that, but it doesn’t negate the facts. You leaned down on my neck for balance,” he leaned in and kissed me before adding, “while you fucked my cock like a goddamn pro, cutting my oxygen clean off—” He nibbled my lips.
“Pasha,” I exclaimed, feeling shocked by his words. Had I really done that? “A pro, you say?” I wiggled my eyebrows, loving the sound of his laughter.
“Don’t worry, I won’t tell anyone,” he teased, lathering up a washcloth and washing my body. “It’ll be our little secret.”
Standing there with him beneath the warm spray, I realized how truly special he was. His hands moved slowly over my shoulders as he worked the soap into my tired body. His touch was everything.
I tilted my head back, listening to the steady cadence of his voice.
I’d always loved the calm timbre of it. The way it could shift so effortlessly—from playful teasing to something deeper, something that curled low in my stomach.
And when he grew emotional, his accent slipped through more heavily, wrapping around his words like velvet.
Every part of him called to me. I looked up through damp lashes. That familiar glint was still there in his eyes, even now, softened by the steam curling around us.
“Thank you,” I choked out.
Emotion rushed up before I could stop it, and my eyes burned. I lifted my hand to his face, my fingers tracing the line of his jaw, memorizing the feel of him beneath my touch.
“For what?”
“For allowing me space to be vulnerable.” My thumb brushed along his cheek. “For the intimacy I feel with you.”
The words hung between us for a moment.
“You feel it, too?” he asked quickly. “It’s not just me?”
The look on his face stopped my heart for a second.
It was a mixture of relief, excitement, and hope.
I nodded my head, unable to form words. We had a natural connection.
It was easy to be me with him. We may have agreed to pretend on this trip, but the reality was, I wasn’t.
I don’t know what that meant for us in the long run, but for the moment, it was enough.
“Give me that,” I demanded, stealing the washcloth from him.
I poured a considerable amount of my body wash on it and lathered it up. I slowly ran it across his chest, washing him.
“I want you to smell like me, even when you’re clean,” I whispered as I washed him thoroughly. My hand swiped lower, down his abdomen toward his V-line.
His cock was hard and ready to go again. It jutted out from the middle of him, and I was struck by the size of it. My eyes grew wide as I took it in. How the hell did that fit inside me? It was so long and thick. I knew it would be, but in this light, my pussy clenched in fear.
A little late for that, now isn’t it?
I gulped as my hand shook as I guided it lower. Using the soapy washcloth, I gently squeezed my hand around him.
“Fuck,” he hissed.
Flinching, I pulled away. “Did I do it wrong?”
“No, princess. You’re perfect. Do it again,” he demanded.
I moved my hand once more, gripping him, then worked my hand up and down the full length of him.
I nudged his thigh with my pinkie and then swiped between his legs, cupping his balls.
I kneaded them as I washed him. His hand shot out, and the feel of his fingers trailed across my cheek.
Back and forth, he grazed my bottom lip with his thumb.
“I’m not going to last long if you keep that up.” His eyes danced with fire, and his breathing increased as I squeezed harder.
“Very well, I’ll stop then,” I offered, reaching for the shower-head to rinse him.
Deep brown eyes followed my every move as I rinsed from his chest down and between his legs, saving his cock for last. Once I knew the soap was gone, I adjusted the stream, angling it across his erection, and rinsed him off. He groaned so loudly that it made me chuckle.
“Kinsley said the most sensitive area of a man,” I breathed, bringing the spray across the underside of the tip of him. “Is right here.” He rose on his toes, threw his head back, and hissed my name.
I crawled it up and down the underside, bringing it up and around the top, concentrating on the head. I repeated the movement several times, watching his face, loving the varied emotions crossing it.
“Jesus, that feels…” he groaned as I made circles around his cock and balls.
He bit his lip and cried out as I switched to a stronger stream, amplifying the feeling. His hips squirmed and he panted.
“Fuck, Bella. As much as I want to come while you’re doing that, I’m going to need you to stop.”
His hand gripped the shower head and pulled it away.
“But why?” I pouted, wanting to get him off like he had me.
Clearly, he was enjoying it. His thumb once more grazed my lower lip, and then he pushed it past my lips into my mouth. I ran my tongue over it and sucked slowly. His eyes immediately moved to watch the motion.
“Because I want your hands on me. Again.”
I reached for him, stroking slowly. My bare hand caressed the heated flesh, and I marveled at the feel of the ridges of his dick. I sucked harder and then popped my mouth off.
“Would you teach me how to suck you?”
My unethical education as a child had given me plenty of visuals, but another area where I was excused from participating kept me in the dark on the actual practice of it.
Sonny wanted to teach me himself, so I only had to watch.
I pushed those memories away. They had no place here in this moment with Pasha.
“I will, but not tonight. I’m going to finish washing your body and then, when this is all nice and clean,” he paused, his hand moved between my legs. “I’m going to fucking feast on you.”
With the thrill of his promises, I let him wash me from head to toe. As soon as I was thoroughly rinsed, he traced the swirls of my ear with his tongue and sucked the lobe tenderly into his mouth. My hands grasped his rigid cock once more. I loved the way it felt, but he disengaged my hands.
“It’s not my turn,” he whispered before turning his attention to my breasts.
He took his time kissing his way down my body, so by the time he knelt on the shower floor, I was shaking. This was going down. His phone, my phone, they were nowhere to be seen or heard.
“Princess, look at me,” he called. Once he had my attention, he spoke the words I needed to hear but didn’t know quite how to express it. “You’re shaking, talk to me. Do you want me to stop?”
“No…I’m…nervous. What if you don’t like the way I taste?” I covered my face with my hands.
“I’ve already tasted you though, don’t you remember?”
“But surely that didn’t count. It was only a little.”
“It counted. Trust me. I’m going to tell you several important things. I hope you’ll take them to heart because every word is true. Number one, I love the way you feel,” he crooned, his accent showing up.
He wrapped his hands around my ass and pulled me toward his mouth. I gasped and reached for his head, still very unsure of this. A huge part of me wanted to hold him back. It was so intimate staring down at him while he was so close to my pussy.
He placed a soft kiss on my inner thigh and then sucked part of it into his mouth and applied pressure. I groaned, and his name slipped free from my lips.
“Good girl. Now for number two, I love to hear you. I don’t care if you’re speaking, yelling, crying or moaning. Your voice is my everything. Promise you’ll use it, always.”
I gulped as emotions erupted inside my chest. My heart beat furiously as he stared into my soul. He did not know what those words meant to me. He couldn’t. Not with the secrets of my childhood and the rules Sonny had reiterated over and over to me so long ago.
“I will,” I choked.
This man was giving me permission. Permission to be vocal, to be—me. Not a dolly with no emotions. I ran my fingers through his hair, loosening my grip and inviting him closer.
“Number three, and this one is important. I love to look at you. All of you,” he growled this one and then slapped my inner thigh, widening my legs. I flushed as his cheek flinched, and I tore my eyes from him.
I didn’t want to think about what I looked like down there, especially given it felt swollen and sore. It couldn’t have looked pretty or appetizing.
“Four and five are tightly woven together. I absolutely love the fucking way you smell. From the body wash, shampoo, down to the perfume you wear. I crave your scent. Look at me,” he commanded.
My eyes shot open, freely, willingly. I’d do anything for this man. I lessened my grip on his head and ran my fingers through the wet strands of his hair.
“And even with a freshly-washed pussy, I can still smell your arousal.”
“You’re to blame for it, though. You do things to me, Lev. Make me feel things. Things I didn’t think I could or would ever want to. You…you’ve turned me into a dirty whore in a matter of days.”
His eyes flared and grew dark. His mouth moved, and once more he was teasing my thighs with his kisses. I relaxed foolishly and felt his teeth nip my skin right by my knee. I jerked back. It wasn’t enough to hurt, but it got my attention.
“You’re not a whore,” he barked as I stared down into his golden-brown eyes.
“Sorry,” I murmured, then added, “Please continue.” I waved my hand.
He smirked and shook his head before placing a soft kiss on the area he had bitten, soothing it. “You make me hungry. I’m so damn drawn to you it’s not funny. I’ve never wanted to taste a woman as much as I want to taste you.”
He lifted my right leg and draped it over his shoulder and, once more, his cheek clenched as he stared at my center. His hands on my ass pulled me closer to his mouth.
“Lev?”
“Yes, Bella,” he breathed.
“Can I be your dirty little princess, then? I kind of like it,” I confessed.
“Silly girl, you already are. Have been since you kissed me that first night at Cameron’s. Now, if you don’t mind, you’ve kept me from what I want long enough. I need you.”
I sighed and leaned back against the shower wall. He let out a loud groan before kissing the top of my pussy. My breathing was so erratic. I closed my eyes and then felt the heat of his tongue on me. His name came out in a long, drawn out breath.
He took my swollen clit into his mouth and sucked. Alternating between light flicks of his tongue and gentle sucking kisses, he licked my pussy. My knees trembled, and I writhed around in sweet agony as he continued to explore every part of me. He pulled back but didn’t look up. I panted.
“Sweeter than I dreamed possible.”
I groaned as he used his thumbs to open me, blowing a stream of cool air over my swollen lips. “It’s like an inferno in there, and I love it. It drives me crazy, the taste of you on my tongue.”
Plunging back in, he growled, and I braced myself. He went rogue and soon his tongue was exploring all around my pussy and even my ass. I gasped at the sensation, unsure but trusting. My back arched as pleasure coursed through my entire body.
“Fuck,” I screamed and grabbed a fistful of his hair and shoved him deeper into my depths. The leg that was thrown over his shoulder tensed when he slowly pushed one finger inside.
“You look so fucking hot right now,” he said as I bucked against his finger.
“I…I can’t…it’s so good,” I panted.
“You want more?” he teased.
I gasped, “I want to come, Lev.”
“Greedy girl,” he chuckled, and then inserted another finger.
My hand slapped against the shower wall as he fucked me. Each stroke of his finger had me wanting to scream. When he curled his fingers and put his mouth over my clit, I lost it.
It was the same sensation as the other day. My head whipped back and forth, and my heart pumped surges of adrenaline through every inch of me. My toes behind his head curled, and the shaking only increased to where I thought I’d fall.
Without warning, the speed increased, and his hand pumped intently as he licked and kissed my pussy.
I was getting close, and it was going to be one hell of an orgasm.
I opened my mouth, but nothing came out for the longest minute.
I sucked in air as all my muscles tightened around his fingers and mouth.
“Lev, don’t stop. Please,” I begged, sounding guttural and foreign to my own ears.
In response, he went harder and pulled me tighter against his face. He groaned as he feasted on me. Suddenly, the walls of my pussy contracted around his fingers. My entire body vibrated. Each suck of his mouth on my clit forced spasms as I came all over his face, screaming my release.