Chapter 12
CHAPTER TWELVE
jake
“Hey, sweetheart. God, I’ve missed seeing your face,” I say after answering Kate’s FaceTime. I lean back on the black leather couch in my home studio, running a hand through my hair as I try to shake off the exhaustion from a long day writing and recording.
“How’s the album coming along?” Kate’s looking fucking gorgeous as she sits on her bed in her condo, wearing an off-the-shoulder college sweatshirt with her hair pulled up in a messy bun.
Fuck. What I wouldn’t give to have her next to me. Although we’ve only been apart for a few days, it feels like an eternity. Every minute away from her is one too many.
I blow out a long burst of air, glancing at the ceiling for a few seconds, attempting to find the words to explain where things stand with the album. How it’s going well and frustratingly at the same time.
“Making progress. Wrote another two songs. We’ll see whether they end up on the final album or not.
” After dragging a hand down my face, I stare into Kate’s hazel eyes, wishing I could pull her into my arms. It’s so much easier to be inspired when she’s nearby.
“Working on this album is different than my previous ones, so it’s difficult to evaluate the process.
There are still a few songs missing, even though I’ve written and recorded demos for more than three dozen. ”
“Wow. That seems like a lot. Is it normal?” Kate tilts her head, accentuating her neck and making me want to pepper it with kisses.
“Yes and no. When I write with other songwriters, we usually end up with more than we need. The big difference is any of the songs that don’t make it can be potentially shopped around to other artists.
That’s not the case for this one. These songs are too personal for me to consider letting someone else sing them.
” A gnawing sensation builds in my stomach, reminding me I need to tell Kate about why this album is so personal. How every song is about her. About us.
I’m not intentionally keeping it a secret.
I’ve told her countless times how she’s been the muse for my songwriting since she came back into my life, but I haven’t necessarily expanded upon exactly what that means.
I keep waiting for the perfect moment to tell her, and somehow, I’ve kicked the can so far down the road that she has no idea, even though I’m halfway done with the album.
Cracking my knuckles, I choose to be vague about the contents of the album once again.
“I’m really proud of what I’ve written. We’ll have to see the label’s thoughts once I’m done.
” Every muscle in my body tenses, thinking about how much control my label has over what I release.
There’s nothing worse than a bunch of suits claiming to know what songs will have commercial success when they don’t know your fans or care about the artist you’re trying to become.
It’s all about the money for them. Nothing else.
My muscles continue to tighten, knowing they shouldn’t have this much influence over creative decisions in my career.
Not at the level I’m at. Jason has assured me my next contract will give me more ownership, thanks to my recent Entertainer of the Year win, sellout concerts, and consistent number ones.
I’m supposedly in a stronger negotiating position than ever before, but that doesn’t fucking help me now.
Minus the surprise song I played at the CMAs, I’ve always done what they’ve asked when it comes to my music.
I don’t know whether I can promise the same level of obedience with this album.
Kate’s voice snaps me back to reality. “I’m glad to hear you’re making progress. Happy to reward you when I see you.” A seductive smirk flirts across her mouth.
Fuck. I want to kiss those lips. Touch her skin. Being apart from her eats away at me. How are we going to handle years of this distance?
Time to change the subject. Can’t solve my work issues or our living situation right now.
“How are things going in Chicago? Good day at work?” Crossing my leg over my knee, I’m ready to distract myself by hearing about her day. I could listen to Kate talk nonstop and never tire of her voice.
She grimaces, briefly glancing away before looking at me and chewing on her lower lip. “I don’t want you to freak out,” she says calmly.
My entire body immediately goes on alert, and my stomach drops as I sit up straight, preparing myself for whatever she’s about to say.
“That doesn’t sound ominous at all,” I reply, forcing my face into a neutral expression. “What’s going on?”
Her face pales, and goosebumps prickle across my skin. I quickly scan what I can see of her body and don’t notice any injuries, which slightly eases my concern. She also isn’t crying, at least not yet, which should be a good sign. But my growing unease doesn’t let up.
“There’s been more interest in our news than expected.” She presses her lips together firmly before continuing, “Nonstop calls to my office. Paparazzi and fans outside my condo. People following Chelsi to work. A few of them got into our building over the weekend. It’s been a little scary.”
My fucking heart stops, and time stands still. Fear and panic erupt like a volcano inside me. Never once did I consider how dating me could impact Kate’s safety. If something happens to her… I’d lose it. Wouldn’t survive it.
Part of me is ready to say “fuck the album” and book the next flight to Chicago.
Find a way to be with her twenty-four seven, so I can ensure her physical and emotional safety.
But I know she’ll find that overbearing and unnecessary.
Instead, I force myself to dampen my innate need to rescue her and wait to see where her head is at before jumping to solutions.
“I talked to Anna. She’s going to try to corral some of the press, but warned it might not do much. I guess this is what she meant by baptism by fire.” A forced laugh and smile come out of Kate.
It’s obvious how uncomfortable she is with everything. How much it’s already impacting her life after only a few days. All because of me.
“I don’t know what to say except I’m terribly sorry, Kate. I never imagined—”
Kate shakes her head. “You have nothing to apologize for. There’s nothing you could’ve done to prevent this.”
In my brain, I know she’s right, but my heart fucking disagrees. It wants to protect her, no matter the cost. I swallow hard, not wanting to ask the next question, even though I have to know the answer. “How scared are you? Scale of one to ten.”
She breaks eye contact, telling me everything I need to know. She’s fucking terrified, and it’s all my goddamn fault.
“Probably a five or six. At least we don’t have any crazy stalkers yet. Anna mentioned that’s much worse.”
It’s my turn to grimace, realizing I’ve never told Kate about the multiple restraining orders I’ve had to get on overzealous fans.
The ones who have tried to break into my house, gone through my trash, and attempted to follow my every move.
It’s been a couple of years since that’s been an issue, so it never crossed my mind to tell her.
It doesn’t seem like the best time to bring it up, either. Not when she’s concerned about the attention she’s already receiving. Why the fuck is Anna talking to her about stalkers when this is happening? Is she trying to scare the shit out of Kate even more?
Now I have a good idea about how she’s feeling, my mind is made up on what I need to do next.
“I’m going to have Max book me a flight for tonight or first thing in the morning,” I reply, standing and pacing in the studio as I hold the phone.
“We should hire private security. Max can work with our contacts to set you up for around-the-clock protection when you’re in Chicago. ”
“Hold on, Jake. You don’t need to come here,” Kate replies confidently, locking eyes with me and causing me to stop. “I’m okay. You need to focus on getting the album done. I know how stressed you’ve been about it, and how Jason’s breathing down your neck about the timeline. As for security—”
“I don’t care about the fucking album. All that matters to me is you.” Frustration in my voice that I’m unable to control. Not at her, at the situation.
“That’s not true. You care about your music, and that doesn’t diminish how you feel about me. I know I come first. I don’t doubt that.”
I sigh loudly. “You’ll always be my top priority. I hate anytime work keeps me away from you. I’d spend every moment of every day with you if it were possible.”
Kate chuckles softly. “You’d get bored with me if you saw me all the time,” she teases.
“Never. A lifetime spent with you wouldn’t be enough.”
She places her hand over her heart, tears welling in her eyes. “Ditto.”
“Back to security—”
“No. I don’t want you hiring bodyguards to follow Chelsi and me around. I want to live a normal life as much as possible. A security team is the exact opposite of normal.”
“I know, but—”
“No, Jake. Please let me have this one. If things get worse, we can talk about it more, but not now. I can’t handle any more of my life being disrupted. It’s too much too soon.”
I nod. Part of me wants to argue, convince her that nothing is more important than her safety, while the other half knows exactly how she feels.
It’s why I don’t have a permanent security team, only using one when I’m on tour or attending events.
It takes everything in me not to push the topic more and insist on finding some type of compromise, like an enhanced security system for their condo—hell, their entire building.
There’s a brief moment of silence. Each of us is unsure what to say when so much has changed so quickly, and there’s practically nothing we can do about it.
And it’s all because of me. My career is causing all this turmoil for her. There has to be a way to make the situation a tiny bit better. It can’t only be gloom and doom for the next few weeks.
The perfect idea pops into my head. “How about you bring Chelsi on tour with you this weekend? You’ll get to spend time with her. Hopefully, it’ll allow things to die down a bit in Chicago.”
Kate’s face lights up. “Seriously? She would love that. I’d love that.”
“Consider it done. I’ll have Max book her on the same flight as you and make sure everything is ready for her visit.”
Kate’s brow crumples. “Wait. Where will she stay?”
I chuckle, knowing exactly what she’s thinking. “Well, she can stay on our bus. There are four extremely comfortable bunks. Or we can get her a hotel room in each town. Depends whether or not you want to be confined to having sex only in our bedroom for a weekend.”
Kate blushes and grins. “I’m sure we can go for one weekend without having sex in the living area.”
I arch one eyebrow really high. “Are you sure about that?”