Chapter 22
CHAPTER TWENTY-TWO
kate
“We can definitely implement those changes for you. Is there anything else you’d like to see in the revised mockups?
” I ask, leading a video call with one of my biggest clients from the comfort of the tour bus.
On Fridays, I commandeer the table, turning it into a mini office so I can be productive while on the road.
It’s not ideal by any means, but it works for the most part.
I jot down a few more notes as the call starts to wrap up when Jake comes bursting through the door.
“Hey, sweetheart. Gonna jump in the shower,” he calls out loudly.
I force a smile, trying to telepathically communicate I’m on a video call, but he doesn’t seem to notice. I clench my fists, hoping my headphones prevent anyone from hearing him.
Out of the corner of my eye, I see him stop at the fridge, downing a bottle of water and wiping his face with his shirt. Keeping my focus on the video call, I stare in horror as my boyfriend takes off his shirt as he walks to the bedroom. All of it is visible on my camera for everyone to see.
Fuck my life.
I attempt to quickly turn off my camera, but the grin on Jeremy’s face tells me it doesn’t matter.
He’s at least seen it, and God only knows who else.
My cheeks redden because I doubt there’s anything more unprofessional than having someone get undressed while you’re on a video call with a major beauty brand.
I plaster a smile on my face, nodding intently as the meeting starts to end. “We’ll have the updated designs to you by Monday morning,” I promise, counting down the seconds until we’re done and I can wallow in my misery.
As soon as I hit end meeting, I rest my head on the table, desperately wishing the last five minutes had never happened. Or that no one besides Jeremy saw Jake.
My phone dings.
Once. Twice. Three times.
I groan as soon as I start reading the messages.
Jeremy
Holy shit. Your boyfriend is hot.
Next time, you need to warn me before he takes off his clothes. I almost spat out my drink.
And yes, pretty much everyone noticed based on their facial expressions.
I cringe when I read the next one from my boss because, of course, he randomly attended the meeting to put in some face time with the client.
Frank
Highly recommend blurring your background for future meetings.
Fuck. My. Life.
There goes my delusion of no one else noticing. And it’s not like blurring my background would’ve made a difference when it clearly displays any person in the camera’s view. I shake my head, staring at the ceiling as I try to figure out how to broach this subject with Jake.
Unfortunately, today was not the first time I’ve looked highly unprofessional on video when I’ve been on the road with him.
He and his team are so used to coming and going that they’ve unintentionally interrupted my work calls on the bus countless times.
Something has got to give if I’m going to keep working remotely while he’s on tour.
Jake strolls into the living area with a towel wrapped around his waist, his hair damp from the shower.
“Want to grab some lunch in a few minutes? I think we’re going to run into town and try out this restaurant one of the locals mentioned.
Might go catch a movie before soundcheck if we have time. ” He drops a kiss on my forehead.
He can’t be serious.
I know I’ve got to eat, but does he not realize I’m working? I can’t drop what I’m doing to hang out with him at a moment’s notice, and the last thing I have time for is a movie.
I inhale and exhale deeply, forcing myself to calm down before I speak. Getting frustrated won’t accomplish anything. “I’m working, Jake,” I reply matter-of-factly. “I have back-to-back meetings for most of the day.”
His face falls, almost like he’s disappointed I’m unable to be at his beck and call.
“That sucks. I was hoping we could spend the afternoon together.” He stands directly in front of the table.
It takes everything in me not to touch his sculpted body or tug at the towel around his waist. Heat pools in my core as I try to remember I have a job to do and fucking my boyfriend in the middle of the day is not on my work to-do list. “Are you sure you can’t play hooky? ”
Calm Kate is gone. Frustrated Kate, who is about to lose her shit, has entered the chat.
“No, Jake. I can’t ‘play hooky.’ I have to work. All day,” I fume, clenching my fists so tight my nails leave marks in my palms. “I definitely can’t skip out on any of my responsibilities after you made a cameo in my last meeting.”
Confusion appears across his face. “What do you mean?”
I chuckle because what else can I do but laugh in this situation—the only other option is crying. “What do I mean? How about when you barged in here ten minutes ago, talking loudly, and getting half undressed in the background of my video?”
His mouth falls open, and his eyes widen as he digests what I said. How many people on my work call saw him taking off his clothes.
“Shit, Kate. I’m sorry. I didn’t think—”
“That’s the problem, Jake! You don’t think about what I’m doing before you come in here.
Neither does your team. It’s infuriating and embarrassing,” I yell, gesturing wildly as if that somehow better communicates what I’m feeling.
Shaking my head, I close my eyes, grateful my next call doesn’t start for almost an hour.
“Let me put some clothes on, and we can talk about this more,” Jake says softly.
A few minutes later, he sits across from me, sorrow written on his face. “I didn’t mean to embarrass you, Kate. Upsetting you is the last thing I ever want to do.” He runs his hand through his damp sandy-blond hair.
I meet his gaze, looking into the eyes of the man who has my entire heart and soul.
Although I know he doesn’t want to cause me any issues, it doesn’t change the fact that trailing around after him on tour for multiple weeks is wearing me down.
I’ve put on a brave face, burying some of my frustrations because I want to be with him and don’t want to rock the boat any more than I already have, but I can’t hold it all in any longer.
“Maybe I should’ve brought this up sooner. Every time I have an issue, I’ve let it go, hoping it would miraculously improve on its own.” I glance at the table for a brief moment. “The truth is, I’m starting to struggle. Being on the road with you is great and challenging at the same time.”
He swallows. “Can you tell me more about what you mean?”
I nod, exhaling deeply. “Everyone is coming and going on the bus. My meetings are constantly interrupted. No one seems to think it’s a big enough deal to do anything about it.
I’ve kept it to myself, not wanting to be the reason why another change is forced upon everyone.
I know your band and crew are frustrated by some of the previous ones you’ve implemented. ”
“They’re not frustrated—”
“Yeah, they are. People talk, Jake. Maybe not to you, but it gets back to me.”
He clenches his jaw, squinting his eyes. “Who is saying shit? Give me names and I’ll tell them to shut their fucking mouths.”
“I’m not going to call people out so you can lecture them. That will only make the situation worse.”
“Fine,” he mutters. He takes a deep breath, his face softening as he reaches across the table and holds my hand. “Is there anything else bothering you, besides people coming and going on the bus?”
“Yeah.” I drag my teeth across my lower lip and look sideways. “The late nights are getting old. It was fine for the first couple of weeks, but now my body is used to staying up until 2 or 3 a.m. multiple nights a week. It’s significantly disrupting my sleep pattern during the rest of the week.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?” he asks, his voice filled with genuine concern.
“What am I supposed to say? ‘Can you please go on stage earlier because my circadian rhythm needs me in bed by 11 p.m.?’”
Jake chuckles, squeezing my hand. “Fair point. Not much I can do about what time I go on stage.”
I drop my head back, leaning against the wall. “That’s part of the challenge. I know you can’t do anything about the late nights. I just don’t know how to adjust my life to accommodate them. It makes me wonder…”
A wave of concern grows across his face, his jaw tightens, and his lips press firmly together. “Wonder what?” he asks, a hint of worry in his tone.
I sigh, dropping my head into my hands. “How can I balance being with you and having the career I’ve always envisioned? There are days when everything seems to work, and other times when it seems so obvious that I can’t have it all.”
“Oh,” he murmurs, letting go of my hand and running both of his through his hair, his face stricken with anguish. “What does that mean for us?”
Oh God. He’s worried I’m telling him I’ll have to choose between him and my career. Even if that were the case, I’d choose Jake every time.
I stand, reaching out for him to join me. Once he’s next to me, I wrap my arms around his neck, inhaling his intoxicating scent and looking directly into his eyes. “I’m always going to choose you, Jake. No matter what.”
All the panic on his face disappears, replaced by a smile.
“I’m just starting to accept that more of my life will likely need to change in the short-term and long-term than I realized. I was naive to think I could have it all. Be able to effortlessly balance everything. And that’s impossible. No one can.”
“I should’ve better prepared you. I’m so used to this lifestyle, I didn’t consider how shocking it would be to your system. It’s all I’ve known for fifteen years, so it feels completely normal to me.”
I chuckle. “Nothing about this lifestyle feels normal.”
“I can’t do much about my schedule for the next year or so, but I can get more involved in planning with my team. Include you in those discussions. Figure out what works best for us.”
“That would be great.”
He grimaces briefly. “Not sure there is anything I can do about an earlier start time for my shows, though. Late nights are kinda a musician thing.”
I laugh, tilting my head back slightly. “It’s the thought that counts. Although I do think there’s an untapped market for earlier concerts. The thirty-and-over crowd would love to be in bed by 10 p.m.”
“Happy to suggest that to Jason and Alex to see what they say,” he teases.
I brush my lips against his. “Can you try to stop getting naked during my meetings? Jeremy has been texting me nonstop about how hot you are.”
“Glad to be of service,” he says with a wink.
I roll my eyes and pull myself in closer, breathing him in and letting all my frustration from earlier wash away.
At some point, I need to face the implications of a life with Jake and what it means for my career, but that’s Future Kate’s problem.
Today, I want to enjoy being with the love of my life and pretending I can figure out how to balance two completely different worlds.
Even when my heart and mind are screaming at me that something’s gotta give.