Chapter 51
CHAPTER FIFTY-ONE
jake
The crisp November air hits my face as Kate and I walk hand-in-hand toward my mom’s grave.
It’s the first time either one of us has been back to the cemetery, and I’m not sure how I’ll feel when I see her name on the headstone.
Although I know her grave only holds the leftover physical remains of her, it feels like the one place I have left to connect with her—to talk to her. And there’s so much I want to tell her.
Kate squeezes my hand as we stop in front of my mom’s grave, both of us taking a moment to come to terms with what we’re seeing and feeling.
Seeing her name alongside my dad’s on the headstone hits me square in the chest, making it almost impossible to breathe. It’s not like any of this is a surprise, but there is something about the formality of seeing their names etched in stone that impacts you differently.
“Hey, Mom,” I say softly as my eyes quickly brim with tears. “It’s me. I’m here with Kate.”
“Hi, Judy,” Kate adds, wiping away a tear.
“You’re not going to believe what’s happened between us.
Or maybe you will.” I shake my head, pausing for a brief second before continuing, “After you died, we spent a lot of time together. Became friends again, just like you wanted. Kate even yelled at me for ghosting her all those years ago. You would’ve been so proud to see her stand up for herself. I know I was.”
“I really let him have it, Judy. Totally yelled at him and everything.”
I chuckle, thinking back to the night at the lake when Kate finally unleashed all of her hurt and anger because of what I did. It was the step we both needed in repairing our friendship and finding our way to each other.
“That’s the night I fell in love with her, or at least realized I was in love with her. It’s also the first time I kissed her.”
“Are you sure your mom wants all of those kinds of details?” Kate asks, worried I’m going to confess all the sordid details about our sex life in the middle of a cemetery.
I shrug because who knows what questions my mom would have if she were alive.
“Anyway, Kate and I are madly in love and planning to spend the rest of our lives together. I think you would’ve liked that. Not everyone’s been supportive of us, but I know you would’ve been.”
“I think so, too.” Tears stream down Kate’s face. “We really miss you, Judy. Wish you could be here with us. My mom used all your recipes for Thanksgiving yesterday, but it wasn’t the same. Not without you.”
“Deborah’s turkey was way drier than yours ever was, Mom.”
Kate laughs, covering her mouth with her hand, almost like she doesn’t want anyone to hear happiness in the middle of such a sad place.
Kate and I stand in front of her grave as I tell her every detail about how we fell in love.
The dates I planned, the trips we took together, and the struggles we’ve had.
I share about my upcoming new album, how it’s a testament to my love for Kate, and how much I wish she could hear it because she’s always said I best express my feelings in a song.
“Do you mind if I have a few minutes alone?”
“Of course.” Kate gives me a quick kiss and walks back to the truck.
“I know you probably can’t see this, but I wanted to show you anyway.
” I pull out the jewelry box from my jacket pocket and open it.
“It’s the engagement ring I’ve had made for Kate.
I’m going to ask her to marry me in a couple of weeks when we’re in Nashville.
I have it all planned out.” I describe exactly how I’m going to propose, not wanting to leave out a single detail.
The cold wind hits my face, chilling the tears streaming down my face. I’ve given up on wiping them away since they’re constantly being replaced.
“I can’t wait to make her my fiancée and wife.
I wish you could be here to see it. To welcome her into the family as your daughter.
” I crouch down, putting the jewelry box back in my pocket and placing my hand on her headstone.
“We’re planning to have children, Mom. You would’ve been a grandma. The best one ever.”
My body shakes softly as the tears fall harder.
“Thank you for bringing us together again. For forcing us to work on your estate after you died. It made me take time off work and reevaluate what I wanted out of my life. More importantly, it gave me the time to fall in love with my best friend. The love of my life. My future wife and the mother of my children. And it’s all thanks to you.
None of this would’ve happened without you.
It makes me wonder if you knew we were meant to be all along. ”
A red cardinal appears out of nowhere and perches on the headstone right next to my hand. Its beady black eyes look directly at me for a few seconds before it flies away.
I close my eyes tightly and grip the headstone harder before taking a deep breath and standing. “Goodbye, Mom. We’ll be back to visit soon. Thank you for always looking out for me.”
I kiss my fingertips and touch the headstone, pushing as much love into it as possible. I take another deep breath and wipe away my tears, then head back toward Kate.
Toward my future.
And my happily ever after.