21
ELEANOR
“I know it’s not a Great lake,” Luke says. “But it is a lake.”
It might not be as endless as Lake Michigan, but Lake Travis is stunning in its own right. Especially from right on the lake. The view from our pontoon is stunning. We’re surrounded by panoramic vistas that stretch for miles. The lush water is streaked with the setting sunlight. There’s a shocking amount of greenery since I’ve always pictured Texas as a desert. And though there are plenty of other people at the lake, it feels so peaceful to be out here to take in the moment alone with Luke.
“I love it,” I say softly.
From his place in the captain’s chair, Luke throws me a soft smile. I never thought I’d say it but a man who can navigate a boat, even if it’s just a pontoon, is sexy. So, we’ve added cowboys and boat captains to the list of guys who are my type.
Hell, I might as well just write Luke’s name on the list in all caps.
The night has been an ideal first date. Luke picked me up at my place with flowers at the ready. We had a beautiful dinner through which conversation was giggly and a little bit awkward in the best first date kind of way. And then Luke brought me out here for a boat ride. It’s all been . . . too much. No one has ever treated me like this. It’s always been dinner or drinks. Usually, we’d split the bill.
I haven’t had to lift a finger tonight and I have to say, I’m loving it.
Luke scans our surroundings, calls it good, and drops the anchor. Once we’re locked in place, he starts to put the canopy down which he’s informed me is called a Bimini. “Can I help?” I ask.
“No,” he says, remaining focused on pulling the top down. A lock of hair falls onto his forehead, his white dress shirt rumples. Rumpled to the point of looking delectable. “You just sit there and look pretty,” he says, then gives me a devilish smile.
I scoff at him, but play my part, drawing my legs up onto the bench and straighten out the legs of my black jumpsuit. A loan from Jolene. When she heard the date was happening, she insisted I buy a new dress for the occasion and when I told her that there was simply not money for a new dress, she offered one of her own.
“It will look better on you anyways,” she said when she brought it into work this morning.
It does look good on me. I won’t argue with her on that. The spaghetti straps and keyhole cutout right at my sternum between my breasts show off my best assets. And I’m inclined to say Luke agrees, not only because he was eager to tell me how beautiful I looked tonight, but also from the way his eyes kept traveling the length of my body whenever he got a moment.
If we’d just met, I’d be uneasy. But it’s Luke. He’s proven ten times over that he’s not just in it for my body. Case in point, his refusal to come up the other night and sleep with me, which, while disappointing, has had me swooning since.
Once the Bimini is down, the sky is open above us, soft purple and twilight blue.
“Okay, now . . .” Luke takes a seat next to me on the bench, extending his arms over the back of the bench, grazing me ever so gently. “Where were we?”
I laugh and tentatively slide my arm over his, resting my hand against his bicep. I resist squeezing to feel the firmness of the muscles. Quietly, I toy with a lock of my hair and keep my eyes away from him. I’m playing coy. Interested to see where he takes this next.
Luke reaches across my lap and places his hand on my thigh, pulling on me until I twist my leg over his lap. “You’re too far away.”
I giggle, relishing the way his hand slides up and down my calf.
“Am I moving too fast?” he asks softly.
I shake my head. “No, this is perfect.”
Luke’s eyes drop to the keyhole cutout on my chest, then lift to meet my gaze.
“I know you’re looking at my boobs.”
He winces, head dropping back. “Sorry, I’m really trying not to.”
“I’m just giving you a hard time,” I say, shimmying closer. “I don’t mind.”
Luke turns his head toward me, continues rubbing my leg.
“In fact, I like it. I’ve been wanting you to look at me like that for over a month, so—”
“So, the truth comes out!” he says through a laugh.
“Oh, come on, it wasn’t that much of a leap. We knew this.”
“I knew nothing. I thought you were way too smart for me.”
I lift an eyebrow. “I mean, if you’re worried about not being able to pull your pretty boy antics on me—”
“No, no, nothing like that,” he says. “What even are ‘pretty boy antics?’”
I flush and gaze out at the water. “I mean, you know how you carry yourself. You’re attractive and you know it and I’m sure you’ve broken a few hearts in your day.”
“I bet you have to.”
I shake my head. “No, actually. I’m the one who ends up heartbroken.”
Luke frowns with puppyish concern.
“No, don’t feel bad for me. I don’t want to feel pathetic.”
“I don’t think you’re pathetic. I think that anyone who would break your heart is a complete idiot and if I ever met them, I’d have a few choice words.”
I observe Luke for a moment. He’s so at peace sitting here next to me. Blue eyes open and vulnerable, his lips poised and ready for whether I speak or go in for a kiss. He’s shaved today, his cheeks clean from stubble. And his golden hair is tousled and begging for my fingers to tousle them some more.
He’s beautiful.
I’m still terrified, though. My ex, Vic, screwed me up in the head. How can someone love you to your face and go against all of that the second your back is turned? And I had known Vic for years by the time we dated.
Luke I’ve known months. I know a first date isn’t a promise of a future, but the way Luke looks at me, speaks to me . . . I have to wonder what he sees in the next week, next month, next year. “You barely know me,” I say.
Luke sits up suddenly. “That’s not true.”
“I mean, it kind of is. You’ve known me for, like, a month,” I say objectively. “For all you know, I could actually be crazy.”
“Now, you know that’s a ridiculous thing to say.”
It is. “I could be awful to be around after a while.”
“I highly doubt that,” he says.
I twist my lips. “I could be terrible in bed!”
“I highly doubt that too,” he says, his eyelids lowering with lust.
I sigh.
He repositions his arm on the back of the bench, sliding himself closer. “Do you not want me to like you?”
“No,” I say.
Luke’s brow hardens. “You’re trying not to hurt my feelings?”
“No,” I say even more firmly. “Of course not. I wouldn’t be out here in a boat with you if I didn’t like you . . . a lot.”
“Then what’s going on in that pretty head of yours?” he asks, then presses a kiss to my temple. “Tell me. I want to know.”
I lean into his kiss. “I might have to leave.”
Luke adjusts some of my curls out of my face. “You mean because of your job?”
I nod. “If I don’t get an extension at Reeder, I’ll need to find a new job. And that might not be in Austin. And I’m not trying to get ahead of myself; I know this is—shit —this is our first date, and we’re not talking marriage or anything, but—”
Oh my god, Eleanor, just shut up .
Thankfully, Luke isn’t pulling away or looking for an exit plan. “I don’t think it’s fair to either of our feelings to act like the past month we’ve spent together hasn’t informed at least some of our feelings. Right?”
“It’s so irrational,” I say. “To already be thinking long-term when—”
“When something’s right, it’s right . . . right?” Luke asks.
His blue eyes are almost pleading with me to agree. Let him know he’s not alone in this.
“What happened to not rushing ?” I ask with a half-laugh.
Luke lifts his head and laughs. It echoes across the water. “Okay, fair point. But you were the one who brought it up.”
“I know I did. I’m just trying to sort out . . .” I place my forehead in my palm. “I care about you. So much. And I’m scared.”
“Nor, look at me,” he says, grabbing my wrist gingerly.
I do so though it’s hard because I know my body has a mind of its own when Luke crowds my vision. All common sense goes out the window. Logical steps become hurried and desperate actions. And my heart fucking aches.
“I want to date you. And keep dating you. And hopefully, date you even a little longer than that.”
I laugh, pressing my lips into a smile.
“If you want to stay in Austin, then I’m determined to keep you here. And if you want to go, you go. Even though that will probably kill me.”
“Stop that.”
“It will, I’m sure of it,” he says, then gives me a playful smirk. “We don’t have to know everything all at once.”
I huff. “I like knowing everything all at once.”
“I know you do, that much is clear,” Luke says. “Too bad life doesn’t go to Eleanor’s plan all the time.”
I fall into him, resting my head on his chest and looking up at the streaky sky. “It would be a lot easier if it did.”
“I know, baby, I know.”
The word “baby” singes my insides. Leaves a mark I’m not going to forget.
Luke trails his fingers through my hair and, for a long time, we’re quiet, watching the changing sky. The boat sways, gently rocking us into a comfortable state of bliss.
I want to stay in Austin. I want a life here. But I want a life with him too. And if I can’t divorce Austin from Luke, I’m going to make a bad decision. I can’t live my life for a man. I did that before. Stuck to what I was used to so that everything made sense, to keep my relationship in line.
Luke starts to hum.
I recognize the tune almost immediately. “Hyacinth.” It settles my insides.
I don’t want to have regrets. Especially not in love.
For now, I’m here in Austin. And I don’t’ have to be anywhere else.
I lift my head off Luke’s chest and kiss his neck softly. Then a bit harder, my teeth nipping at his skin.
“Nor . . .” Luke breathes.
Placing my hand against his cheek, I direct his mouth toward mine until we’re kissing. We’ve already got the first kisses out of the way and while it’s the first date, I have abandoned propriety and sense at the door for want, impulse, and the nowness of it all.
With our lips locked in kiss after kiss after kiss, I take hold of each of Luke’s hands and place them against my belly. Slowly, I guide them up, up, up until they’re pressed against my ribs, right beneath my breasts.
Luke breaks away from me, panting. “You don’t have to–”
“I want to,” I say before he can finish. “I want you to touch me.”
A soft groan tumbles out of the back of Luke’s throat.
I move his hands up to cup my breasts. He tightens his grip on me, and I sigh in ecstasy. Just to be held. To be wanted. By him, like this, out under a big and beautiful sky.
Luke jerks his hands away from my chest, drops them to my waist, and yanks me into his lap, peppering kisses down my neck. I squeal in laughter.
“You’re trying to rush me, Eleanor,” he growls in my ear like I’ve been bad, his twang coming out.
My body sings.
“And we might not know how much time we have, but goddammit, I am taking my time with you. ”