CHAPTER 44 #2
“Isn’t there anything else they can do? Like…
” I take a moment and gather my thoughts, and even though I’m nervous as hell, I spill the rest of what I’m thinking.
“Okay, I’ll be honest. I did some research and found out some things.
I don’t know your medical history, so I was shooting in the dark, but I found a ton of information when I dug deeper on migraine remedies.
There are some medications in testing with good results, some natural remedies, massage, acupuncture, and there are a few surgeons who are worth their weight in gold, according to the reviews. ”
He stares at me for what feels like an eternity. Like, way too fucking long. The corner of his mouth pulls to the side.
“Oh, shut up.” I slap his arm, but he ends up grabbing my hand and using it to yank me close.
“Damn, woman. You have no fucking idea what that means to me that you did that.”
“What, that I’d take time out of my day to help you if I can?”
He nods. “That and you didn’t just look for a quick fix. You cared enough to do more, learn more.”
“Well, I kind of like you. Sometimes. Not always.” I emphasize by trying to push away, but he holds on tight and even wraps his arms around me.
He takes off his glasses and tucks them into the collar of his shirt.
When he hits me with that soft look again, my muscles instantly relax, because those deep pools of blue put me in a sort of trance, and I’m suddenly putty in his arms.
Fuck. This man. This time, my inner voice doesn’t snap at me harshly. She whispers it like an exhaltation.
His voice is husky when he says, “Thank you. Maybe over dinner, you could tell me everything you found out.”
I tuck a wayward strand of hair behind his ear, and his eyes close momentarily. “I’d like that.”
It’s me who initiates the kiss. Because his skin is gorgeous in the sunlight, his half-smile is too much of a temptation, and I mean, he’s right there. It would be criminal not to, right? Right. Or at least that’s what I tell myself.
I join my mouth to his, and he grips the sides of my face, taking full advantage of the kiss.
We get a bit carried away, tongues stroking softly and languidly over each other, small nips, and stifled moans. When we break apart, he coughs and adjusts himself. Then he steps away, removes his sunglasses from his shirt, peels off said shirt, and drops both into his bag.
If I thought I was a mess over him before, it’s nothing compared to the intense simmering heat that lights inside my body.
Because holy hell, this man. His chest is glorious.
The definition in his chest and arms. The dark treasure trail.
The sun on his olive skin. The tattoos. They just do it for me.
He starts on his belt next, and my attention is absorbed in the sight and sound it makes as he opens it and then unbuttons his jeans.
Am I frozen in place and staring?
Yes, yes, I am.
He takes off his hiking boots and socks and then pushes down his jeans, revealing dark gray boxer briefs. It’s at this point that he laughs, smiles a full smile.“Are we swimming to cool off or are you just going to eye fuck me all day?”
“I’m not—”
“You are. I’m not complaining. You wanna eye fuck me, you can go right ahead. Do it as long as you like.” He spreads his arms wide and wades into the water, and I watch the muscles dance over his back as he moves. The massive tattoo of his colors is incredibly sexy.
Doubly so when he turns, sinks into the water, and rises out of it dripping wet. He rakes his hair back and swipes water from his face.
Mary, Mother of God. Is he doing this on purpose?
Then he splashes me. Fucking splashes me. “You getting in or what?”
I fling the droplets off my arm and glare at him. He keeps walking backward, getting farther and farther away with each step.
“What if I said I couldn’t swim?”
“Can you?”
“Maybe.”
“That’s a yes.”
“Okay, yes.”
He eyes me critically. “Then what is it?”
I know. And maybe he does, too, and that’s why he picked this place, this adventure, this perfect day. If I get in that water, this relationship changes. Because there is no fucking way I walk away from it without touching him and vice versa.
So what does he do?
He fucking bawks. Like a chicken. It starts low and soft, but gradually increases in volume.
Motherfucker. Nervous energy spirals through me as I fumble to take off my top. Shuck my shorts. Step out of my shoes. I’m tempted to ball up my stinky socks and throw them at him, but I refrain, barely.
He doesn’t look away. Instead, he stands chest deep in the water and watches me enter the lake
in nothing but a baby-blue string bikini. I take the band out of my hair and run my fingers through it until it falls in loose waves.
He mutters a curse under his breath and rubs his hand over his chest.
I smirk and cautiously make my way around the rocks and into the lake.
When I’m in deep enough, I disappear under the water and swim to him.
I don’t stop swimming until I reach him, then I rise and stand before him.
Not as the girl he used to know, but in his eyes, I can see that who I am now is who he wants.
He consumes me with his gaze, in a way that tells me he loves what he sees.
As if to put an exclamation point on that, he cups my cheek and rubs his thumb over my cheekbone. The desire in his gaze makes it impossible to look away.
And I know that this… this is it. The moment I either give in to him and embrace this fully, or make excuses and spend the rest of the day trying to fight this gravitational pull.
It’s the most pivotal fucking moment of my life. And what do I do besides meet his intense blue-eyed gaze with my own, and study those features that I have loved for too damn long?
I say fuck it, because I can’t keep denying this feeling anymore.
Doing so puts me at odds with myself, my own mind, my own sanity.
It’s a constant battle of wills that I lose every damn time, because the ache for him is all I’ve ever known.
And I don’t want to keep struggling in vain.
Not for one more day, one more minute, one more second.
I want to fucking live and find happiness. Every path I take leads me back to him as if trying to show me where I need to go to find it. I’m finally ready to listen and see where this road leads.
And in a way, I’ve always known that running from this feeling is a lost cause. Whatever we have is stronger than any force I’ve ever come in contact with. It’s like Fate just won’t let us be anything but this—together and in love, or the whole fucking world falls apart for the both of us.
So yeah, I give in and take what I’ve craved for so long.
I palm the back of his neck at the same time he wraps his hand around my waist. I’m yanked into his body, and I tug his mouth down to mine.
We eliminate every inch of space between us, and the moment we make contact is akin to two weather systems colliding.
A life-altering force affecting time and space.
Water splashes from the waterfall, a bird cries, and the world rights itself.
Separately, the sexual tension is weatherable and bearable, but together and connected, it dominates everything and bows to nothing. Finn and I—we are just pawns to this intense connection we share.
Which also seems dialed up to the highest level, as if we both know it’s our one last shot to get it right.
I give him all of me in that kiss, and if the way he greedily devours my mouth and boldly explores my curves is any indication, he gives me all of him in return.
We cling to each other like our lives depend on this moment. Hell, maybe it does.
When I jump, he catches me. My arms wind behind his neck, and my legs easily wrap around his waist.
Another bird cries out nearby. We both peer up to see a flock of them take off as one into the sky. When I look back down, I search his eyes. He cradles my face and stares up at me.
“Are we doing this?”
I nod. “We’re doing this.”
“Thank fuck.” And then he pulls me in for another kiss.
I hum in pleasure against his mouth, and he sucks on my tongue a moment before deepening the kiss.
His fingers knead my back, then venture down, and he grips my ass.
I grind down hard against the hard ridge of his cock.
The half-growl, half-groan he releases has my belly fluttering with excitement, and chills breaking out across my fevered skin.
On our next breath, he shakes his head. “Woman, you’ve got no damn idea what you do to me.”
I grin slyly. “Tell me.”
“Rock my fuckin’ world in the best goddamn way.”
“Yeah?”
“Fuck yes, you do.”
I suck on his bottom lip. I’m rewarded with his fingers sinking into my flesh more deeply. After lightly scraping my teeth across his lip, I let it go. Our tongues dance, and he tilts my head to change up the angle of our kiss.
Sinking my fingers into his hair, I lightly scratch his scalp. His fingers deftly untie the string at my back. I only leave his mouth for a split second to let him rip the offending bikini top away, and he tosses it aside without care, before crashing his lips back to mine.
When my breasts press against his chest, his sparse chest hair brushes over my nipples.
With my left hand, I reach down and palm his cock.
Then I sneak my hand under his briefs and moan at the velvety feel of him as I wrap my fingers around him.
The water helps ease the glide as I stroke my hand up and down a few times, and then caress his sack.
His growl is one hundred percent primal and all need.
I try to push his briefs out of the way, but I don’t manage it entirely.
He helps, and then his hand comes back to me. His fingers delve under my swimsuit at my core. He finds my clint instantly and rubs the aching nub with skilled fingers, using a swift and harsh circular motion.
The kiss turns scorching, and we both moan at the same time.
The desperate need riding us is maddening and all-consuming.
When the heat between us builds to the point that I can’t take it anymore, I beg for more.
“Please, please, get inside me.”
“You sure?”
“Nope, but we’re doing this anyway.”
Then he says two words that make my fucking day. My year. “I’m clean.”
“Me too.”
He doesn’t mess with getting rid of my swimsuit. He simply pushes the material aside. And oh, my fucking god. When he starts pulling me down on his blessed cock, and entering me, I gasp because Jesus Christ, I’d forgotten how endowed he was. It’s a stretch, but the very best kind.
His groan is long and drawn out and sends a shiver down my spine. I break from the kiss to suck in a sharp breath. “Jesus.”
“Oh fuck, the feel of you opening up for me. Does it feel good, baby?”
“So fucking good.”
He slowly begins to thrust, and I grip his shoulders and move in a rhythm I know so well.
But everything is different this time, though. Because it’s not just sex, it’s all the emotions of love wrapped up together into one—desire, hunger, ecstasy, obsession, passion, and even a little vulnerability.
“You riding my cock is sexy as hell, you know that? Can’t wait to see it. Can’t wait to lay you out on my bed and fucking punish this pussy from the hell you’ve put me through.”
“You say such sweet things,” I scold in jest.
“Just wait until I get you beneath me, woman. You’ll see how absolutely not-sweet I can be.”
“Is that a promise?” Saying the words has my heart fluttering, but I can’t not give voice to them.
“You bet your ass it is.”
“Good. I’m gonna hold you to it.”
“Go right ahead.”
I kiss him hard instead of answering. It’s a relief to at least know with utter certainty that I’m not alone in this. The thought of that ignites my very soul.
The water laps at our bodies, and we create our own current. The surface of the small lake ripples with the waves we make together.
As the force behind his thrusts grows harsher, and our movements become more unsteady as we lose ourselves to the pleasure, curses fly from our mouths whenever we part.
Goose, for his part, speaks in non-intelligible grunts, and groans, and it’s a melody that says so much more than spoken words do.
We’re satisfying a longing and a craving for each other that’s been a long time coming, and it’s so mind-altering that reality bends to a pinpoint and nothing outside this little bubble of pleasure matters.
I hold on tight as he drives into me. I work my body over his and revel in the sensations of pleasure. I’ve learned that my breath on his ear drives him wild. So I keep my face near his and whisper in his ear how fucking good he feels inside me. Then I nibble on his earlobe and bite down.
“Fucking, hell. Get there. Fuck, I’m going to come. Wanna feel you gripping me baby and cumming all over my cock. Yeah, baby. Cum, Lily. Come on, my sweet little vixen.”
His hand comes up to cradle my face. I pull his thumb into my mouth and suck on it. He, in turn, tunnels his other hand behind my head and grabs a handful of my hair, and just that slight pinch of pain rockets me straight into my orgasm. My pussy pulses around his cock.
“Fuck. I feel you. I fuckin’ feel you squeezing me so goddamn tight.” He drives into me one, two, three, more times. Each time punctuated by the sharp snap of his hips. He takes my mouth in a rough kiss and groans against my lips as his release barrels into him.
As the kiss turns more tender, and as his body starts to relax, I can’t help but think, f uck reality.
I just want him and I never want to leave this moment or forget this feeling.
Not having this and knowing it existed has been pure torture.
Something I never want to let slip through my hands again.
Even if it’s just fucking. We’re damn good at it. And I don’t care what tomorrow brings as long as I can count on more of this with him.