Chapter 28 #2
I turned my head from him. It made sense, but it still stung.
He shifted to my side and pulled me into his arms. “Don’t be mad at me. I just want you safe.”
“I know,” I grumbled as he kissed my forehead.
I fell asleep in his arms, and the next morning, after saying goodbye to Rach and my parents, he brought me home, where our team’s headquarters had been moved. The living room was crowded with tables and stacks of boxes, evidence-filled whiteboards standing everywhere.
He insisted the team work from his apartment while I was recovering, refusing to leave me alone. The director had granted it, seeing that there was a mole in the FBI building.
Everyone had passed the director’s questioning and polygraph tests.
Liam had been the only traitor in our midst. And all of us had sworn not to breathe a word of our investigation to anyone outside the team.
Even the director received bogus updates.
And I had a suspicion that he was on to us.
But he kept quiet, took our false reports without a word of protest. Because the director wasn’t stupid either.
So he supported our secrecy. Looked the other way when our paperwork didn’t quite match reality.
Because anyone in that building could be another traitor.
Just like Liam.
But could I really call him a traitor when he’d risked his life to save mine? Who knows what would have happened to me if he hadn’t been there—whatever the hell he was doing there, in the first place.
I still couldn’t wrap my head around it; how close he was to the Apparitions.
A memory had me jolting upright in bed.
Raina’s face when she saw Liam. I had thought it was his death-stare that had her scared. But she knew him. She knew he was with Grayson.
And that death-stare Liam gave her, hadn’t been for my benefit. It had been a warning for her to keep her mouth shut.
Owen reached for me, wiping at his eyes. “A nightmare?” he mumbled, blinking up at me.
He had been sleeping soundly next to me, but I couldn’t get my mind to shut down. I had a strange feeling that I was missing something. Something vital.
“Raina knew Liam,” I answered.
Owen frowned and sat up next to me. “You’re right. She started freaking out, right after Taylor opened the door.” He was quiet for a while. “You remember what she said? That Varon already knew we were there. That he was hearing everything we said.”
Gods! “She was shaking and screaming at the window that she wasn’t going to talk. She…”
“Was screaming at Liam,” Owen finished my sentence.
“We should go see her again. If she knew Liam was working with Grayson, there has to be a lot more she knows. She is his… girlfriend, after all.” I couldn’t help the slight cringe as I said the words.
Owen didn’t miss it. “It still bothers you.”
I sighed. “No, it doesn’t. Not like you think. It’s just… weird to me.”
He nodded. “It’s okay if it does, Ava. I’m not expecting you to act like you never loved the man.”
The way he said it—I frowned. “Is that why you don’t want to have sex with me? You think I’m still hung up on Grayson?” He’d been using every trick in the book not to take it any further than kissing.
Owen fell back onto the pillows with a groan. “I really don’t like you saying his name when we’re in bed together. It’s bad enough I had to listen to how he talked to you while you were fucking.”
I gave an incredulous laugh. “Are you being serious right now?”
Owen shifted his gaze to me, then pulled me onto his chest, our noses almost touching. I watched as he struggled to find the words.
“I’ve never been the insecure, jealous type.
But I’m really struggling with this. I was there, Ava.
I know how much you loved him. I saw how torn up you were over him.
You’ve told me yourself that you could never love someone like that again.
I don’t want to be your second choice, the placeholder, because you can’t get who you really want.
Not when I can’t even fathom not being with you every day for the rest of my life.
” He pushed my hair behind my ear. “I need all of you, A.”
My throat closed up. “You have all of me.”
“Do I? You still dream of him.”
I flinched and pushed away from him, but he held me tight. “That’s not fair, Owen.”
“I know, I’m sorry I said that. What I’m trying to say is…
” He dragged a hand over his face. It took him a few tries before he could say the words out loud.
“Will you ever love me like you loved him? All or nothing. Ride or die.” His lips turned up into a sad smile as he studied my face.
“Will you lure men to their deaths just to make me happy?”
“Owen, I stabbed a man in the neck for you. I was ready to die with you in that office. Is that not all or nothing? Is that not ride or die enough for you? Gods, have you forgotten that I shot him?” I sighed, collecting myself, then smoothed a thumb over the stubble on his chin.
“I don’t love you the way I loved Grayson.
What you and I have is different. But if you’re asking me if I can love you as fiercely as I loved him?
Then yes. I can. I do,” I whispered. “I’d thought I couldn’t, but I do. ”
I swallowed against the panic. It was hard to say. It was hard to admit to myself. Yet again, I had thrown every ounce I had to give of myself at someone. It was scary as fuck.
But I had to remind myself that this time was different. This man deserved my heart. He wouldn’t trample all over it.
You hear that, Grayson? He’s nothing like you. Owen is no blackhole. No, he’s the sun. Warm. Needed.
Owen kissed me, but when he pulled away, his eyes were still weary.
“I want you, Owen. I…” I swallowed hard, “I love you.”
Owen blinked as if my confession surprised him before he smiled, light returning to his eyes. “You do?”
“Yes,” I breathed.
“Enough to grow old with me? To choose me?”
I nodded, my throat thick with emotions.
“So, this can wait.” I pointed between us.
“The Apparitions are still too much a part of our lives.” It was a precarious situation.
My… ex was still in the picture, looming over us.
I understood why Owen felt insecure about my feelings.
“Let’s wait until after the auction. When they are behind bars and out of our lives.
It’s just a few more weeks.” I sighed dramatically, playfully trailing my finger over Owen’s bare torso.
“I wanted to run away with you, but if you insist on staying, I could try and keep my hands to myself for a few more weeks.”
My finger came to a stop at his waistband, and I gave it a small tug. His pelvis tilted towards my hand. He huffed a breath at the smug, victorious grin spreading across my face.
He pulled me down against him and twisted. I couldn’t help but giggle like a fool as he pinned me underneath him.
“Do you have any idea how torturous this is? God, Ava, I want you so fucking bad,” he groaned. “You have no idea.” He brushed his lips against mine. “But I want all of you. Not just your body.”
I wrapped my legs around his torso, pulling him closer, shivering as the heat of his body spread through me. “We can wait until you’re sure, O. But you can have whatever you want from me. I’m all yours.”
Owen released a breath, his shoulders relaxing. “I’ve been fantasising of hearing you say those words for so long,” he admitted.
I chuckled. “You have?”
He grinned, a mischievous twinkle lighting his eyes. “Technically, you were moaning it in my fantasies.”
My stomach flipped. “What else am I doing in these fantasies?”
Owen bit my lip, gently pulling at it, before his eyes found mine again. The heat in his gaze sent a wave of heat through my body. “You arch up into my hand when I touch you.” His hand trailed up my side. He cupped my breast and squeezed lightly.
My breath caught in my throat as he rubbed a thumb over my nipple—already straining beneath my shirt. It sent a pulse of electricity shooting through my body, all the way down to my core. I pressed up into his hand, craving more.
His cock twitched against me in answer. “Yes, just like that.”
“Owen,” I breathed. My head felt cloudy as he continued to tease my nipple. Was I going to say something, or did I say his name just for the sake of it? All I could think about was the growing ache between my legs.
“Yes, Ava. You do that in my fantasies too.” He dropped his head to my ear. “Moaning my name over and over and over again.”
I had to stifle a moan at his words. Gods, I couldn’t give him the satisfaction when he was blatantly teasing me like this. I reluctantly pulled his hand from my breast. “Please stop, O. How am I supposed to go back to sleep without ripping your clothes off right now?” I groaned.
His mouth was on my neck causing goosebumps to ripple over my whole body. He gently sucked on the skin clamped between his teeth. Gods, it felt good. I thrusted my hips up against him, desperate for friction, desperate for him.
He sucked in a quick breath through his nose and released my neck, finding my lips. His tongue slid against mine as he thrusted his cock against me, giving me the pressure I craved. I moaned into his mouth and dug my fingers into his ass, so he would do it again. I needed him to do it again.
He thrusted again, and this time I moved with him. His arm snaked underneath me, cupping my ass to press me harder into him each time he slid his cock against me.
“Fuck, Ava,” he breathed as he looked down to where our bodies connected, not breaking his rhythm as he slid his rigid dick back and forth against my clit. My pyjama pants were completely soaked with my arousal. “We look so good together.”
I grabbed a hold of his jaw, guiding his face back to mine. “Imagine how good we’ll look when your cock is sliding in and out of me.”
“Keep talking like that and I’m coming in my pants like a goddamn teenager,” he panted, his eyes wild with hunger.
“Hmm,” I closed my eyes and bit my lip, falling into the feel of him against me. “I can’t wait to taste it.”
He chuckled. “I can let you have a taste.”
He pulled his waistband down and exposed the head of his cock. I buckled my hips against his at the sight of it. All those nights that I had practically thrown myself at him like a feral cat, and this was the first time he let me see it.
I watched him swipe two fingers over the bead of cum on his head, and lift those fingers to my mouth. I lifted my head and opened my mouth to taste him, but he retracted his fingers. I looked up to see him smirking down at me, an eyebrow raised.
He wanted me to stay still, so I did. He smeared his cum over my lower lip and I almost came. Then he pushed those two fingers into my mouth.
I had no idea Owen could be this kinky.
I rolled my tongue around them and sucked them clean.
“Jesus,” he breathed, his eyes fixated on my mouth.
He slowly pulled his fingers out, then pushed them deeper into my mouth.
He pulled them out again and this time pushed them in all the way to his knuckles, simultaneously thrusting his exposed dick against my clit.
It was only my own pants that separated us.
I breathed through the gag reflex as he held his fingers there and relaxed my throat around them. Triumphantly, I watched the utter desire on his face as he watched me.
“Swallow,” he demanded, staring at my mouth.
I did, my throat contracting around his fingers. His cock twitched and he groaned, thrusting it hard against me. “Oh, the things I bet this mouth could do,” he whispered before replacing the fingers in my mouth with his tongue.
My body was pulsing with a fiery heat. I grabbed a fistful of his hair and pulled him deeper into the kiss, desperately meeting every one of his thrusts against my aching core.
He shifted his position slightly and I gasped as pleasure skittered up my spine. “Gods, Owen, yes! Like that.”
He gripped my ass harshly, squeezing me against him in that perfect angle. Three more thrusts and my back arched off the mattress, unable to hold off the orgasm that shattered through me.
Owen’s name echoed off the walls in the room, that had him throwing his head back, a shudder rippling through his body.
“Jesus, Ava,” he hissed as he thrusted against me one last time, hot cum spilling over my stomach.
I almost came again, satisfaction ringing through my whole body at how he lost control.
Pride glowed hot in my cheeks as he collapsed on top of me, burying his face in my hair, as he panted for air. “Fuck,” he whispered on every breath he blew out. “Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.”
I giggled. His reaction was beyond satisfying after weeks of being stopped when it got too heated.
He lifted his head to look at me. I raked my fingers through his hair, grinning at the look of awe on his face.
“That was the sexiest thing I’ve ever heard.” He kissed both my cheeks.
“What?”
“You saying my name when you come. Jeez!”
I giggled again as he nipped at my bottom lip.
Owen huffed a laugh and looked down between our bodies. “You made me come from dry humping.”
“Imagine then, what it would be like to fuck me,” I whispered haughtily into his ear, grinning as he shuddered.
Owen cleaned us both up before climbing back into bed, pulling me against his chest. I sighed happily, loving the feel of his warmth.
Loving that we finally crossed that line.
There was no turning back now. There was no escaping the attraction that pulled us towards each other, that no amount of cold showers could extinguish.
And it didn’t scare me one bit. He was my safe place, I realised. I could always count on him. He was as steady as the tides of Bentley Cove. As steady as the rising and setting of the sun. I could rest easy in his warmth. I could breathe without worry that my oxygen would be snatched away.
“Ava?” he whispered against my hair.
“Hmm?” I sighed happily, as the peacefulness in my heart lulled me to sleep.
“I love you too.”