18. Isabella
18
ISABELLA
“ W hat?” Bella asked, still unsure what the doctor meant.
Dr. Henderson’s cheeks lifted slightly, squinting his eyes into an expression of pity. “Most of the imaging I’ll be ordering today won’t affect an unborn child. However, I won’t be ordering an abdominal MRI out of an abundance of caution.” He opened his hand, and the nurse passed him the tablet. “In the check-in paperwork you completed online before your visit today, you indicated that you were unsure of the dates of your last menstrual cycle.”
The air Bella was trying to inhale was thick in her chest. “Right. I– I don’t remember when it was.”
“You also indicated that you were unsure of pregnancy,” the doctor said as he turned the tablet around to show her.
Bella read the question amongst dozens of others. “Are you pregnant, or is there a possibility you could be pregnant?” She’d clicked the option “Unsure.”
The question was like many others with answer options of yes, no, or unsure. She’d clicked right through it when she’d completed the check-in paperwork the night before.
Now, the question stood out on the screen like a neon sign. That little “unsure” had just turned into a “yes.”
The doctor pulled the tablet away from her and tapped on the screen. “Did the lab tech go over what would be tested from your blood sample earlier?”
Bella rested her head in her hand. A gnawing pain worked behind her brows as she tried to remember something that happened just half an hour ago. “She might have. I don’t remember. I wasn’t exactly expecting anything like this.”
Dr. Henderson handed the tablet back to the nurse and clasped his hands in front of him. “I know this is a lot to process. It means we’ll have to be careful with tests we use to follow up on your recovery, but the good news is that you’ll be able to start getting the prenatal care you and the baby need.”
Bella gasped and covered her mouth. It was all sinking in way too quickly. She was pregnant. On top of everything she’d been dealing with lately, this news pushed her over the edge. Her breaths came in quick succession, and each was shallower than the last.
Dr. Henderson rested his hand on her shoulder. “Miss Young, you need to slow your breathing.”
“I can’t. I’m pregnant,” she said through her panting.
“We can refer you to an OB/GYN who will conduct more testing. There is no indication that there is any harm to the baby yet.”
Bella’s head jerked up. “Harm? What do you mean?”
Dr. Henderson’s expression softened. “Miss Young, there’s nothing to worry about. I can share plenty of resources with you. There are many non-profit organizations that assist young mothers in caring for their unborn babies and, eventually, their children.”
“I’m homeless! I have a brain injury and still don’t remember enough about who I am. I’m not ready to care for a baby. I can barely support myself!”
Dr. Henderson turned to the nurse. “Can you get her some water, please?”
“Yes, sir.” The nurse hurried from the room, closing the door behind her.
When the doctor turned back to Bella, the wrinkles spreading from the corners of his eyes and the dusting of gray in his hair gave him the look of a kind grandfather. When he smiled at her, she took the first full breath since he’d broken the news.
Dr. Henderson squeezed her shoulder. “We’re still going to check on your brain injury today, and I’m confident you’re healing well. I’ve seen amazing things during my time as a physician, and I believe you’re healthy enough to carry this baby. Before you leave here, I’ll make sure you have information on plenty of places you can go for help.”
“Help? What kind of help?” Bella asked. If he was talking about a place that could help her get rid of her baby, she wasn’t interested in that kind of help.
Her baby. The whole idea was still inconceivable, but an impenetrable door had already slammed shut on any talk about abortion.
“Plenty of non-profit organizations provide free prenatal care. There are places where you can attend free classes where you learn how to take care of yourself and your baby during the pregnancy. If you need formula, diapers, clothes, or even nursing supplies, there are places you can get those things for free.”
Bella’s heart was still hammering in her ears, but the war drum started to ease as the doctor told her about the options she had for keeping the baby.
The nurse sped back into the room and handed Bella a cup of ice water. She took it and sipped the crisp liquid.
The nurse stepped to Bella’s side and rubbed a hand in big circles along her back. “It’s gonna be okay. You can do this.”
Could she? There were still so many unknowns and scary possibilities, but between the assurance of the doctor and nurse, Bella was starting to calm down.
Doctor Henderson squeezed her shoulder again. “Do you want me to pray for you?” he asked.
Bella nodded and wiped at a tickle on her cheek, and her hand came away wet. “Yes, please.”
Dr. Henderson and the nurse left their hands on her shoulder and back as they bowed their heads.
Oh, he was going to pray for her now . He wasn’t just saying he would do it later to give her some kind of unreachable hope.
“Lord God, I lift up Isabella to You today. I pray that You give her strength and healing but also wisdom and fortitude. I pray she would be reminded over the months ahead that You are in control and You are always with her. I pray You would place people in her path to help her, and I pray You would hold this mother and baby in Your loving hands. Amen.”
Bella sucked in a deep, life-giving breath as she raised her head. The turmoil inside her had eased, and her chest was lighter as she wiped her silent tears. “Thank you for that.”
With her anxiety dissipating, she was able to talk about how she’d been feeling since the incident and the memories she’d recovered. Dr. Henderson was pleased with her recovery and urged her to get plenty of rest, drink lots of water, and start taking a daily prenatal vitamin immediately.
When Bella stepped out into the waiting room, Anna sat with her head down typing quickly with her thumbs. She didn’t even notice Bella until she was standing right in front of her.
Anna raised her head with a smile already in place, but the joy faded from her expression when she looked at Bella. “What’s wrong?”
Of course she looked a mess. She’d just cried multiple times and added dozens of doctor appointments to an already full schedule.
How was she going to be able to work and get to these appointments without a car? Where would she live with her baby?
Her baby. The news still hadn’t fully sunk in. She was going to have a baby. She didn’t even know how far along she was or when she was due, but the doctor and nurse assured her she would find out those things at her first prenatal appointment that was scheduled for the next day.
Anna stood in a rush, dropping her phone and grabbing Bella’s arms. “Talk to me. Are you okay?”
Could she say it? Would saying the words make them true and final? She didn’t have a home, and she didn’t even know the baby’s father.
“I’m pregnant.”