15. Chapter 15
Chapter fifteen
CATHERINE
Hey, would you want to grab a super quick dinner tonight before small group for your birthday? I could pick you up at like 5:45 after I get off work?
Ahh, that would be so fun! I’d love to! I’ll send you my address
I smile to myself, excited about a birthday dinner.
I love my birthday. I’m one of those annoying, over-the-top people who wants the whole day to be a giant party. Even the whole week, if I could pull it off. My mom always went overboard celebrating when we were growing up, and college was the perfect atmosphere for celebrations.
But ever since I graduated, I haven’t done anything major for my birthday. One year, it fell on a weekend, so I was able to go back to KC and hang out with Amaya. As an Arrow staff member, I’m typically the person planning the fun for students, so it felt weird trying to plan something to celebrate myself.
Of course, I have gushing messages from Amaya, Lana, and my family today. But the prospect of dinner with a friend and then cookies with my small group has me giddy all day. Maybe they’ll even sing “Happy Birthday” to me tonight!
Catherine pulls up to my duplex at 5:45 on the dot. I practically float down the steps to her, bubbling with excitement.
“Thanks for doing this! It’s going to be great!” I tell her as I buckle my seatbelt .
“I have the perfect place in mind,” she replies with a grin. Catherine tells me about her day at work as we drive toward Center Square. She finds a parking spot, but when we get out of the car, she comes around to my side.
Catherine holds up a handkerchief. “I’m sorry, Teegan, but I’m going to have to blindfold you.”
My heart lurches with excitement. What?! A surprise?! Yes!
I submit myself to the blindfold and let her lead me down the sidewalk. Music grows louder as she leads me through a door. Even though I’m blindfolded, I can still sense the darkness of wherever we are, interrupted by flashes of light.
I love this so much . My smile might permanently burst my cheeks, I’m grinning so widely.
Catherine leads me through another door and then pulls me to a stop. She takes off the blindfold, and I open my eyes to see a crowd of people wearing party hats. There’s a loud jumble of “Happy Birthday!” and “Surprise!” screams. I take in the room filled with everyone from my small group, Gina and Lucas from staff, Bailey, and a handful of seniors from Arrow.
Yep, my cheeks are goners. They’ll never recover from the happy grin splitting my face.
“You guys! This is amazing!” I exclaim, turning to hug Catherine. “Thank you!”
She laughs. “Don’t thank me—I was only the decoy, not the mastermind.”
Glancing around, I see a table full of food and drinks. A heaping platter of Sarah’s cookies caps the table, alongside a huge cake with “Happy Birthday Teegan” iced on top. The next thing I notice is a small stage with microphones at the front of the room.
“Oh my gosh! We’re doing karaoke?!” I can’t stop myself from jumping up and down.
Gina and a couple of the senior sorority girls kick things off with a karaoke classic, “Party in the USA,” as I take a few moments to walk around to thank everyone for coming. Bailey is standing with my church small group, and I gush my enthusiasm for the party .
“This is absolutely the best,” I exclaim. “I love surprises. And parties. And karaoke! Gah, I couldn’t be happier!”
“Hold on, you have one more surprise still,” Bailey says with a smile, then nods over my shoulder.
I swivel around to find not only Amaya, but Amaya and Lana grinning behind me.
I scream.
They scream back and envelop me in a tight hug. I would cry if I wasn’t so impossibly happy to be back together with both of my Beefs in the flesh. I haven’t hugged Lana since spring break.
“What are you doing here?! Oh my gosh! I can’t believe you flew all the way here, Lana! Don’t you have class?” I’m squeezing her so hard she probably can’t breathe, but she manages to laugh anyway.
“I got my work done ahead of time, so I could be gone for a couple of days,” she says. “I’ll fly back to D.C. tomorrow evening, but I couldn’t miss an epic birthday party for my Beef!”
“You’re the best ever! And you too, Amaya! This is two trips to Brooklyn on my behalf now,” I say, transferring my squeeze hug to her.
“And I’d make a hundred more,” she declares.
“How did you even know to come?” I ask, mind still reeling with delight.
Lana and Amaya glance at each other, the look laden with unspoken communication. Amaya shrugs a shoulder, and Lana turns back to me. “Brooks planned this whole thing,” she says in a low voice. “He got Bailey to contact us to see if we could come and surprise you.”
That information is possibly the only thing that could still my hyperactive energy.
Brooks planned this whole thing?
Of course, he would remember how much I loved celebrating my birthday. But why would he go to this much effort?
My mind is overloaded with puzzling thoughts and emotions. The kind I don’t want to sort out right now. Or ever, maybe. Besides, I can’t waste this perfect night with all of my people in one room. A karaoke room, no less!
“I’m just going to table that bombshell for later,” I tell Amaya and Lana. “Let’s party! ”
My time is divided between killing it in karaoke and conversing with each person in attendance tonight. Lana and Amaya take the stage with me for a flawless rendition of “22,” even though I rolled past that age a few years ago. Hey, if Taylor can sing it on tour at age thirty-four, then I’m allowed to sing it at twenty-six.
Brooks rallies Will and Jason to sing with him. He carries the group through a performance of “Bye, Bye, Bye,” surprising no one when he dances all the choreography. Will and Jason are a half step behind, but they mimic his moves, being good sports for my party even if it may not be their jam.
Bailey even appears to be having a good time, joining in a group song with Catherine and Sarah. I notice that Amaya and Lana both make it a point to include her. Having all of these people here to celebrate me, to celebrate life , makes me all kinds of grateful and elated. I just have to avoid the one person responsible for it all.
By the time our reservation ends at 10:00 p.m., my vocal cords are shot, but my heart is full.
Best night ever.
“This is just like the old days! I could cry!” I exclaim. Lana and Amaya are staying at my place tonight, and we’re currently camped out on my double bed with slushies. I’m sitting cross-legged in the middle of the bed, facing them as they lean against my headboard.
“Thank you so, so much for coming. I still can’t believe you’re here,” I say. “I’m so HAPPY!” I throw my hands up and fall back on the bed. Amaya has the presence of mind to remove the slushie cup from my hand before I risk dropping it on the floor.
Lana laughs, but then her voice takes on a curious tone when she comments, “Seems like Brooks planned your dream birthday party.”
I fold my arms to cover my face. “Yes. Yes, he did. Why did he plan my dream party? ”
“That question might be secondary,” Amaya states. I peek out from behind my arms. “The real question is: how do you feel about him planning your dream party?”
I groan, staring up at the ceiling as I process out loud. “I don’t know. I mean, of course, it makes me feel special that someone went to so much effort. That someone knew what I would want and made it happen, right down to getting you two in attendance.”
Lana pats my leg that’s stretched out next to her. “But how do you feel about Brooks being the someone who did that?”
I don’t want to admit the truth out loud. Because the truth is that far down in the deepest recesses of my heart, I love it. I love that it was Brooks who did this for me. But the fact that I love it makes me recoil. I want to run away from my reaction to him. Run away from him . I’m the kid who got burned and is now skittish around the fireplace. Every instinct screams to stay far away, yet the mysterious beauty of the flames entices me.
“I don’t know,” is all I manage to say. “What do you think?”
“This isn’t something we can think for you, Teegs,” Lana says softly.
“That’s not fair though—I told you that you should get back together with Mateo, and look at you now! You owe me decisive advice,” I whine. Lana rolls her eyes.
“Well, if that’s the card you’re going to pull, then I’ll remind you of what you said to me,” Lana chides.
I yell out, “Don’t remind me!” as Lana talks over me saying, “ You don’t have to limp through life knowing you’ve been cut off from your person .”
I’m silenced.
“You were thinking about Brooks when you said that, weren’t you, Teeg?” Amaya asks.
My continued silence is enough of an answer.
Lana plops down next to me, leaning the side of her head against mine. “We’re not going to tell you what to do, Beef. You obviously have some tough history with Brooks. And he’s clearly changed a lot since high school. But this is your heart we’re talking about here. Amaya and I can’t tell you how you should hold your heart in this situation. ”
Amaya flops down on my other side, making me the middle of a Beef sandwich. My happiness would be complete in this moment if not for these lingering questions.
“No matter what you decide to do, we’re with you,” Amaya adds.
I chew my lip. “So, if I decide to fly to Italy tomorrow to start a new, exciting life, you’ll come with?”
Lana slaps my arm. “Be serious. You know what she means.”
“I’m always serious,” I deadpan.
“Always,” Amaya says, and I can hear the eye roll in her tone.
“No more serious talk. Time to reminisce about all of our favorite college memories,” I announce. The great thing about best friends is that they know you as well as you know yourself. So they know I need to move on to light-hearted conversation. And that’s exactly what we do.
I barely sleep, but it’s not because of my conflicting thoughts. It’s because we stay awake most of the night talking and laughing, swapping memories and current updates. And draining our slushies, of course. This night with my Beefs is the balm for my soul I didn’t know I needed so desperately.
The balm that Brooks made possible.