Chapter 16
CHAPTER SIXTEEN
Nikolas
A few evenings later, Mike invited me over for dinner. While he cooked the chicken, I chopped vegetables for the stir-fry and brought him up to date on everything that had happened with Leyla.
He turned toward me, taking his attention off the hot pan on the stove, and glared at me.
“Friends? You told her you wanted to be friends?” he asked incredulously.
I shrugged. “What did you want me to do? Ask her on a date?”
“Ah, yeah,” he said, his eyes wide, eyebrows high like I was an imbecile. Maybe I was.
“I can’t logically jump from her treating me like the enemy to ‘hey, want to go on a romantic dinner date with me?’ I have a carefully crafted plan. I need to think about this scientifically.”
“You really are hopeless. This isn’t science, it’s a woman, a relationship. Two very different things, my friend.”
“I know that, but this isn’t some woman. This is Leyla we’re talking about. She’s intelligent. Special. Unique. It’s going to take more than some silly scheme to win her over. By the way, you’re burning your chicken.”
He quickly turned back to the stove, muttering under his breath, and shook the pan. “Pass me the veggies. And don’t get your panties in a wad. I’m being nice and cooking you something special for dinner.”
I held back my retort that chicken stir-fry was the only thing he knew how to make. Over the years of knowing him, I’d eaten my weight in it.
“I’m not getting my panties or any other item of clothing in a wad. I just need to be methodical about this so I don’t mess up again.” I handed him the vegetables before washing my hands and stirring what he called his special sauce.
“Changing the subject for a minute, speaking of panties and whatnot, try dressing less…James Bond and more hot lumberjack.”
There was no way I was taking the bait on that subject, so I ignored him.
As he swirled the pan back and forth over the flame, he asked, “Anyway, what do you even know about relationships? Remind me again what your longest one was?”
“Three months. Luisa Reines. She was very sweet, but we weren’t compatible.”
Mike huffed out a laugh. “Three months. I’ve had rashes that lasted longer than that.”
When I didn’t answer, he turned toward me and saw the horror on my face. “What?” he asked with a shrug.
I shook my head. “It’s a wonder you get women to fall for you.”
He smirked and turned off the burner. Holding his hand out for the plates near me, I watched as he spooned generous servings onto each one. The smell of ginger and sesame oil filled the small kitchen.
“It’s all in the confidence. Women appreciate a man who isn’t afraid to tell her how he feels.” He joined me at the table.
The sound of forks scraping plates was the background noise as I let my thoughts float back to Leyla.
“I stand by my plan. For me to come right out and tell her how I’d like to date her is like skipping steps in an experiment. You just can’t do that. I can’t do that.”
Mike put down his fork and stared. “This is a woman you’ve been pining over for almost a decade, dude. Haven’t you waited long enough?”
I pushed my hair off my forehead. “You sound like Defne. Okay. Let’s just say you’re right, which I’m not admitting to yet,” I warned. “Tell me what you’d do.”
He rubbed his hands together quickly, looking like a mad scientist with that evil glare. Regret came immediately.
“Hmm. So now that she knows more about you, and you told her that she matters to you, let’s use it to your advantage.”
I shoved his shoulder. “I’m not tricking her into liking me, Mike. That’s childish.”
He rolled his eyes, then patted me on the arm. “Shut up and learn from the master. Think of me as Yoda, and you’re Luke Skywalker.”
“Great, now we’re changing genres that you’re obsessed with. Point Break surfing references to mind-melding science fiction characters,” I said with a scoff, resuming my eating.
“First of all, wrong reference. That’s Star Trek, not Star Wars, and second of all, just shut up and listen. When my brilliant plan works, you can thank me at the wedding,” Mike said with a stupidly wide grin, his eyebrows waggling in double time.
My ridiculous best friend must’ve known the idea of winning Leyla’s heart and pursuing a relationship that would end in marriage would get my attention. “Fine. What did you have in mind?”
“Easy. Admit to her that you’re awkward around women,” he said around another bite, making happy noises at the taste of his food.
“So tell her I’m no good at relationships. Brilliant,” I deadpanned.
“You’re not seeing the big picture here. Tell her that you’re nervous around women, which is the truth, and ask for her help.”
I put down my fork and looked at him. “That makes no sense. How could I win her over by proving I’m not relationship material? That’s humiliating.”
“Ah, little Padawan. Listen and learn from the master. Tell Leyla you’re interested in a woman and that you’d like her to help you overcome your shyness to win her over. She doesn’t have to know it’s her you’re talking about.” He threw up his hands as if saying ‘voila, problem solved.’
My eyes narrowed as I let his idea sink in. “What exactly am I asking her to do?”
“I don’t know. Maybe be like your dating coach. Go on pretend dates as a ruse to spend time with her, let her see how great you are,” he answered, booping me on the nose like a child. Backing away from him, I growled.
“That has to be the dumbest thing you’ve ever come up with. More ridiculous than your idea to invite several women to join your one-on-one ‘study group.’”
Mike smiled at the memory. “I was hedging my bets and hoping one of them would show up. How’d I know all six would?”
“They thought they were there for help in biochemistry, not you with candles and John Legend playing in the background,” I said with disdain, doubling down on my resolve not to take relationship advice from this man.
“I wish you could’ve seen their faces. Still have the scar from the brunette who clocked me in the chin with a textbook.”
“Like I said. Ridiculous.”
I couldn’t help but join in his laughter. It was beyond me how he could charm so many women. He was a great guy, but an overgrown child back then and maybe even still now.
“Hey, don’t hate on my ideas. Cynthia actually stayed, and we ended up dating for a few months. She was so beautiful,” he said, his eyes glazing over.
“You went out longer than your rash lasted?” I teased, making him grab the plate with my half-eaten dinner, ignoring my protests.
“No food for you if you’re going to be mean.
” He put the plate on the counter and sat back down.
“Listen, girls love that kind of challenge. She agreed to be friends with you. Friends help each other out, right? Think about it. Take her out a few times, pretending to need some help with small talk.”
I took a shaky drink of lemonade. “You can’t be serious. I’ll just invite her to dinner as my friend and get to know each other better that way.” His idea was causing my stomach to churn.
“You’re missing the point. As a friend, you can’t pretend to hold her hand or look longingly in her eyes. Tell her you need to practice. Dude, it’s a brilliant plan. You just need some time for it to percolate. Put it through your rigid hypothesis, Niko. I’m telling you, it’ll work.”
I wanted to smack his smug face, but the niggling thought of whether this could work didn’t leave me for days.
The next week, after a particularly challenging day in the lab, I ran into Leyla and Jaz in the break room. Still not convinced Jaz wouldn’t bring up the Siri incident, I tried to stay out of her way and ignore her knowing grin.
Praying for her silence, I waited for Leyla to finish at the coffee maker. When she looked over her shoulder and saw me, she said, “Oh, hey, you. Heard about the mishap earlier. Figured out what was wrong?”
Side-eyeing Jaz, I answered, “Yes, it was a calibration issue, not structural. We’re making good progress.”
“I knew you and the team would figure it out. Think you’ll meet this week’s goals, then?”
“I do. Just need some caffeine before heading back in.” I hoped it came off lightheartedly.
She chuckled and turned, her cup in her hand. “I’ll get out of your way, then. See you at the meeting at four.”
When she started to walk out of the room, Jaz asked loudly, “Niko, did you ask Siri for help with the calibrations? I’ve heard she’s very informative.”
My face flushed crimson as I turned my back on Leyla, who had stopped at the door and asked, “Jaz, what are you even talking about?”
“Nothing,” she sang, grabbing a donut. “Nothing at all.”
I didn’t relax until I heard both sets of footsteps leave. Between Jaz and Mike, I felt like my well-ordered life before joining Earth Organix was all but gone, and I’d entered some kind of romantic comedy.
Deciding to ignore my friend’s harebrained idea, I was going to get up the nerve to ask Leyla to lunch. A regular lunch, not some fake dating coach nightmare.
As our last meeting ended and everyone filed out, I took my chance and walked over to Leyla, who was packing up her things. Grateful that things hadn’t been too awkward around each other after our conversation a few days back, I felt a lunch invitation would be appropriate.
“Hey, listen. I’d like to take you to lunch tomorrow,” I asked, fisting my hands at my sides to keep me grounded.
“Is that a demand or an invitation?” she asked, not looking at me.
“Ah, sorry. It’s an invitation.”
She looked up, her hair swinging with the motion, and I almost got lost in those eyes again. “Oh, well, my noon phone conference got canceled, so, yeah, I’m free.” Her friendly smile put me at ease. This would work. I just needed to get her out of the friend zone, little by little.
“Great. You choose the place, and I’ll stop by your office a few minutes before. We can go together,” I offered, hoping that wasn’t too far. I held my breath until she answered.