Chapter 19
CHAPTER NINETEEN
Leyla
“This is me. Niko. Demir. Hi.”
His text made me giggle like a schoolgirl. Answering him with the details of game night, I went back to work. Or at least I tried to.
It had been two weeks, and I was still processing our conversation about him being neurodivergent.
There was so much information that it was overwhelming.
My heart went out to him and his family for navigating it all at such a challenging age.
At fourteen, I had enough on my plate just dealing with school, boys, and teenage drama.
I would have never known, yet so many things fell into place now that I did. His awkwardness at times, the inability to follow obvious social cues, and his need to see tasks through to completion.
It was kind of him to offer his forgiveness, but it still bothered me how badly I reacted to what happened in college. I mentioned it vaguely to my mother when we spoke recently, and she reminded me that if Niko had forgiven me, I needed to forgive myself. I was trying.
His words about not treating him differently hit home as well. There was nothing in me that made me want to pity him. The man was a brilliant scientist and a kind human being. Just because his mind took its own path in responding to the world around him didn’t mean he was less than.
It was evident that Niko wanted me to treat him with dignity and respect. I couldn’t imagine any other way.
Pushing my hair from my face, I groaned when I remembered I’d invited him to game night. It was more evidence of my descent into madness, but my friends would not take no for an answer after I blurted out about the dating coach situation.
But it would be just as I told him, a way to ease into the dating lessons. Since he hadn’t mentioned it until that conversation, I had to. It was driving me crazy, just floating out there in the cosmos. It was clear I had to make the first move.
Telling him to bring Mike would at least make it seem less like a couple’s thing. It was a stroke of genius on my part. But even so, there was one little area I needed help with: my growing attraction to Niko.
The incident at the leadership meeting was a case in point. But to my credit, I mean, come on, the man was wearing chinos. Chinos and a shirt, the two top buttons undone, and no tie. Not a suit. Business casual. And let me tell you, he nailed it.
I snorted at the memory of saying those same words when I tripped and nearly ended up in his lap.
Luke made fun of me mercilessly for ten minutes when we left that meeting. I was mortified at almost falling over just looking at Niko in casual wear.
How was I going to pretend to date him when I couldn’t even walk by without tripping over something?
I didn’t know if he caught some of my body language when we were together, and I prayed he didn’t. All the breathless reactions, loud swallowing, and blushing. So embarrassing.
Realizing that I was now tapping my pen on my desk with the same vigor as a drummer in a rock band, I set it down and pulled my laptop closer. Thankfully, Jaz's constant reminders about my schedule kept me busy for the next few hours.
“Jaz, see if Naomi in marketing is free, please. I want to go over something with her before my next call,” I said as I opened my office door. She saluted me, followed by a wink.
“She’s free and waiting for you,” she answered after a quick phone call.
“Great, thanks. I’ll grab my water and head up.”
When I passed her desk, she was standing, her hands on her hips, tapping her high heel. “What’s going on with you?” I asked, checking my phone for an email I was waiting for.
One perfectly sculpted eyebrow rose when I looked up. “I should be asking you that, girl boss,” she said. Oh, boy.
Knowing she had intel on everyone about everything, I mentally reviewed any incriminating things I’d done lately. It could be one of many recently. She was impatient and leaned closer.
“Having trouble staying upright today?”
I deflated like a balloon the day after a party.
I should’ve known there was no way my humiliation wouldn’t get back to her.
One of her minions must’ve ratted me out.
Bet it was Sarina from accounting. Ever since Jaz played matchmaker for her and Joseph, the woman would do anything for Jaz. But I wouldn’t fold so easily.
“No idea what you’re talking about. Gotta go. Naomi’s waiting.” Trying to walk past her, she slid in front of me, her eyes laughing. I tried to slide the other way but was thwarted again.
“We look like we’re doing the Cuban Shuffle,” I said. “Move.”
She snorted. “It’s the Cupid Shuffle, doofus. And she can wait a minute. Want to tell me what’s going on with you and the Turkish delight?” Geez, she was giddy with power and knowledge.
I scrunched up my face at her description while filing it away for my own personal use later on. “Have you gotten into the special brownies again?”
Her whole demeanor changed to revulsion, her eyes twitching, mouth in a sneer. I knew that would knock her down a peg.
She sneered at me. “Never going to forget that happened, are you? I told you I’d never trust my cousin Tony again. And no, I haven’t, but it sounds like you might have. Falling over Niko in the conference room.”
“I didn’t fall over him,” I hissed. “I tripped, that’s all.” I stepped around her, ready to break free. I was still musing about the Cuban Shuffle thing. I’d have to look that up.
“Mmmhm. Whatever you say. But you might want to know, he has a girlfriend.”
Stopping in my tracks, I whirled around. “No, he doesn’t.”
My statement sounded more defensive than I intended. Just looking at her now wicked grin, I knew she smelled blood in the water.
Run! Now!
“And how do you know that?”
“He, uh, mentioned it the other day when we were having lunch,” I answered, berating myself for another slip.
“Don’t have time to ask about that interesting little tidbit, but later, you’re mine.
Anyway, Donna in the lab heard it from Seville, who overheard Niko on the phone saying he was trying to win over some woman he was interested in.
Looks like you have competition.” She sang the last sentence, and I wanted to throttle her.
“Makes no difference to me,” I tossed over my shoulder, walking quickly to the elevator. Once safely inside and thankfully alone, I slumped against the wall.
What in the fake dating twist was she talking about? He told me he wasn’t seeing anyone and hadn’t been for a while. Understanding dawned on me, sliding down into my addled brain.
Of course. He took me up on my offer to help him on dates because he was interested in someone. Did not see that coming. It wasn’t like I thought we'd start dating, did I? I didn’t even know if that’s what I wanted. I mean, up until recently, he was my sworn enemy.
And yet…there was a sickly feeling in the pit of my stomach, like the time Sofia dared me to eat sardines from the can. I shuddered just thinking about it, except this was so much worse.
Straightening up and wiping down my skirt as the elevator stopped on my floor, I mentally scolded myself for being jealous. As I marched into the marketing department, I made up my mind.
Niko and I were friends, and that’s all we’d ever be. End of story.
The rest of the week went by quickly. Whenever I crossed paths with Niko, I was courteous but not overly friendly. Several times, I caught him looking at me, but he averted his eyes quickly, and I wondered if he was getting up the nerve to ask about our first lesson.
My declaration that we were only friends wavered at the thought of helping him catch the attention of whoever he was interested in.
“This is ridiculous,” I whispered. I was preparing to leave the office on Friday when my phone vibrated with an incoming message.
Niko: Hey. I guess I will see you tomorrow.
I bent my head back, staring at the ceiling in frustration. With fake cheer, I answered.
Me: Yes! Can’t wait.
Shoving everything I’d need for the weekend into my bag with force, I nodded and headed home.
You can do this. You are just friends getting together. That’s all. It’ll be fun.
I really needed to stop lying to myself.
Saturday morning, I went downtown to the Little Italy Farmer’s Market to pick up some specialty cheeses and jams for game night. It had been ages since I’d been there, and I could feel the tension of the week melting away as I sampled my way through the mass of tents.
That night, I made a simple dinner of roasted, farm-fresh vegetables I’d gotten at the market, along with some basmati rice topped with a pungent gorgonzola cheese and a drizzle of local wildflower honey.
Just the act of going there, being outside, so near the beautiful harbor, I felt like I’d reclaimed a tiny piece of myself.
Niko’s words from our lunch still whispered into my heart that night as I got ready for bed. It was becoming clear that I had to let go of the lies my ex had told me. I could feel God’s prompting in the stillness of the evening as I lay in bed that night.
“God, I want to leave these things behind and find peace. Be patient with me a little longer, please.” I let those words, a promise from my heart, follow me into a peaceful sleep.
I texted Vicky Sunday morning, letting her know I wouldn’t be going to church, but I’d see her that evening.
She sent me the kissing emoji, so I knew she understood.
I took my coffee to the front porch and enjoyed what she and Sofia called ‘il dolce far niente,’ the sweetness of doing nothing.
My Italian girl tribe would be so proud. It felt decadent, but freeing.
After a late breakfast, I found my Bible and scanned it for something to speak to my soul. I wasn’t ready to look up the scripture in Ephesians that Niko had told me about, knowing it meant a reckoning of sorts. That morning, I just needed God’s word to calm my soul.