Love By Design (The Elements of Love #1)

Chapter 1

one

. . .

Miles

I’m killing it as a single dad.

“MJ, honey, we’re going to be late,” I called up the stairs.

“It’s 7:45 am, and I’m already exhausted," I mumbled to myself, stuffing my laptop into my bag and turning off the constant stream of music that flowed from my phone. Music was basically our love language.

I sighed heavily as I looked around our house, which looked like a tornado had hit it, with boxes strewn in every corner.

The house wasn’t usually like this, but after years of being in the home my daughter was born in, we were moving to another city, a move I prayed was what she needed to bring joy back to her life. The decision was overwhelming, but she’d always come first.

“Daddy, I’m coming, I’m coming. Can’t find my English book,” my daughter answered, her voice getting louder as she bounded down the stairs. “School’s almost out. Who cares if I’m a few minutes late today?”

“This from the girl who made me wait outside of school a whole hour early on your first day? And I found it in the laundry basket,” I teased, pouring coffee into my travel mug. I could practically hear her rolling her eyes as she retrieved the missing book.

At nine years old, Madelyn Jane, the light of my life and reason for my existence, believed she was already a teenager. I was not prepared for this. Since she recently scored 130 on her IQ test, it was extremely important to let her be a kid for as long as possible.

“Breakfast burrito again?” she grumbled, lifting the foil-wrapped breakfast-to-go to her freckled nose.

“Hey, don’t knock the burrito. Eggs, sausage, beans, and cheddar in a toasty flour tortilla is a well-rounded meal, kiddo.” I held mine up and said the words like a cheesy commercial, making her giggle. It was my favorite sound.

MJ was what my brother Luke called sunshine in a bottle; always smiling, singing, or dancing.

Her voracious desire to learn meant she flitted from one hobby to another, in addition to her love of all things science.

Astronomy, art, pottery, and even voice lessons topped the list. Music was what made her happiest, though.

It was a passion we shared wholeheartedly.

Watching her gingerly gather her school things reminded me so much of her mother, Katy.

My ex-wife’s exit from our lives still stung deeply, even though it had been almost seven years ago.

Just like her daughter, everything about Katy was vibrant: her smile, her personality, even her clothes.

Pushing the memories aside, I finished clearing the kitchen and put the eggs and cheese away in the refrigerator.

MJ slipped her backpack on and took a bite of her breakfast as I smiled at her eclectic style.

She had recently announced she wasn’t into princesses anymore, to my dismay.

Today, she wore a floral-print dress, a jean jacket, and black combat boots.

They were a gift from her Aunt Sofia, my brother Luke’s wife.

But for several months now, she had seemed sad and a bit withdrawn, though she denied it when I asked. Something felt wrong, and that became the main reason I paid a high price to break my office lease in Crescent City, Northern California, and move back to San Diego to be near our family.

Noticing the time on my phone, I shook myself out of my thoughts. “Let’s go, kiddo.”

MJ held the front door open for me, pushing a few boxes out of the way as I nodded my thanks, my hands full with breakfast, coffee, and my messenger bag.

“I can’t wait to get to San Diego, Daddy. I forgot to check off yesterday on my calendar, but I know we move in eighteen days, right?”

“Yup. Right after school ends. And Mimi and Papa, Uncle Lukey and Aunt Sofia are counting the days, too.” We worked as a team to get all our stuff into my truck, and when we were both inside and buckled in, I exhaled loudly.

“You okay, Daddy?” MJ asked from the back seat, her sweet voice high-pitched, laced with concern. Looking at her in the rearview mirror, I pasted on a smile.

“A-okay, kiddo,” I answered. “Ms. Stacy will pick you up since I couldn’t move that meeting I told you about.

” For this move to be seamless, a slew of staff meetings had to be held, and I hated not being able to pick her up.

MJ had several friends who would be hard for her to leave behind, so I wanted to be the one there at the end of the day as the move got closer.

She brushed off any discomfort as usual when I felt inadequate, always letting me know I was a good dad.

But I constantly felt like I was swimming upstream and failing.

Reaching her long, skinny arms toward me, her fingertips met my shoulder. “It’s fine, Daddy. I told you. It’s no big deal.”

When she leaned back, I blew her a kiss in the mirror and drove her to school a few miles away. There were only a few weeks left in the city we’d called ours for years. Except for being so far from family, it had really been home for the two of us.

When we arrived at her school, MJ jumped out of the backseat and made a heart with her hands, just as she had every day since she was about four, and my own heart swelled with love as I returned the gesture.

“Bye, Daddy. Love you.”

“Love you too. Have a great day,” I yelled as her friends surrounded her and disappeared onto the school’s playground, where they “got their wiggles” out before class started, MJ called it.

Rubbing my jaw, I parked my truck in the parking garage under the building that housed my office, I let out a long breath, steadying myself for the day ahead. Grabbing my forgotten breakfast, coffee, and bag, I locked up and took the elevator.

I wasn’t inside the office even a minute before I was bombarded. It had been chaotic ever since I decided to move our home base to San Diego. I was grateful that about half my staff of fifty had chosen to follow me there.

“Miles, Mr. Norton wants you to call him immediately. The building manager says you still haven’t sent him that last form, and Jody called out. We’re short a programmer,” my office manager, Susan, said in rapid-fire.

I was fortunate that she was among those moving with us.

She was a straightforward, no-nonsense, by-the-book employee I would be lost without.

If only I could get her to smile every now and then, I’d know I had succeeded where no one had.

I loved teasing her, but she never took the bait, seeming to barely tolerate me at best. Deep down, I knew she cared for me. Her loyalty conveyed more than words.

Walking into my office and setting everything down, I said, “I’ll call Mr. Norton before lunch. Tell the building manager to check his spam folder. I sent that form two days ago, and I’ll fill in for Jody. Just give me a few minutes to settle and make that call.”

“Done.” She walked out, tablet in hand, already handling my requests.

I noisily plopped down onto my chair, causing it to spin, as I grabbed my now-cold burrito.

I wolfed it down with a few swallows of coffee, glad to at least have some sustenance in me for what was shaping up to be another hectic day.

Looking around at the boxes along the walls, the reality that everything was about to change hit me square in the face.

My tech company, E-Health, was thriving after the early years of struggle. We had developed an app that helped patients easily navigate their healthcare.

After my grandmother, Nana Chiara, fell ill, I knew I wanted to shift away from flashy apps that helped no one and instead created one that even older adults could understand.

It served as a portal to their doctors and test results, and a resource for healthy solutions.

I also created a way for patients to find and join local clubs and organizations that emphasized health and wellness.

My brother Luke’s organic cosmetic company, Earth Organix, originated from Nana Chiara’s unique cream blends. When she passed away several years earlier from an aggressive form of skin cancer, our family was devastated.

As if I’d summoned him, I laughed when my phone buzzed, and I saw Luke’s goofy picture on his contact info. I was still cackling when I answered.

“When are you going to change that stupid picture of me on your phone, man?” he asked, knowing exactly why I was laughing.

Taking a breath to calm myself, I said, “Never. It makes my day every time you call.”

“MJ better know how much I love her to have let her do that to my hair. It took Sofia an hour to get all those tiny rubber bands out,” he said, finally giving in to a chuckle.

“She does have you wrapped around her little finger.” Switching to my AirPods so I could work, I asked, “So, what’s up?”

“Just checking in. All set for the big move? You won’t let me help, so I don’t know what’s still left to do.”

“I’ve got it, little brother. It’s all taken care of. The movers are confirmed, and our flight is booked. Still planning to be there when we arrive?”

“Wouldn’t miss it. Sofia and I will probably have to fight Mom and Dad to pick you up. Did you look into that school I sent you info on?” he asked. I could hear Sofia in the background telling him to stop asking me.

“Stop trying to spend your money on my kid and me. I don’t think MJ would thrive in a snooty school like that. I’ve made some calls, and I’m pretty sure where I want her to go. I am successful, you do know that right?” I grumbled, taking a sip of coffee.

With a heavy sigh, he answered, “Fine, fine. Do it your way. Just know that we’re here. Or at least for the first month after you get here. There’s something big happening at Aura that needs Sofia’s attention in Positano.”

“Mom told me, and don’t worry about it. She and Dad will help out after you guys leave. Still enjoying your switch from CEO to Board Chair?” Earth Organix had been his sole focus until Sofia came back into his life.

“It’s different, but yes. I’m loving the freedom to come and go to Italy with Sof.”

“I’m so jealous. I can’t wait to go back.”

“Yeah, everyone missed you the last time we all got together.” His voice turned almost sinister as he said, “You know who was there last time. I think I told you, but just had to mention it again,” he teased.

No, no you didn’t.

Blowing out a loud breath, I answered, “Don’t start, Luke. Not going there. She’s too young.”

“Eh, look at me and Sof. I’m younger than her.”

“Scandalous,” I said in a mocking tone, making him laugh.

Wanting to pull the conversation away from the gorgeous woman in Rome my brother was referring to, I added, “Anyway, MJ’s going to have a great summer. Think of all the zoo trips you can make with her while I’m settling at the office.” I smirked as I waited for the explosion.

“I just don’t understand why kids want to touch you and talk to you when you don’t even know them. And those smelly animals. So gross. Don’t get me started on the food there. Plastic seats on those buses. Long lines, ugh.” I bit my lip not to laugh out loud at my brother’s hatred of the zoo.

“Don’t you think when your kid is born, he or she is going to want to go to the zoo, Lukey?”

He groaned, and I knew he was about a minute from hanging up. Changing the subject, I said, “Yeah, well, all that aside, you really need to stop this stuff with Vicky. I told you about the glare her brother Enzo gave me at his wedding.”

Luke laughed, and I could hear his feet shuffling as he walked. “Just saying. I haven’t heard you talk about a woman like that since…”

I huffed out a breath. “You can say her name. Funny you mention her. Was thinking about her this morning looking at MJ. They’re so similar.”

“Well, I think it’s time you move on. When was the last time you even went on a date?”

“Not everyone gets what you have with Sofia. And when exactly am I supposed to date with all I have going on right now?” I asked, unable to keep the pain from my voice. My sharp words made his footsteps halt.

“Miles, you deserve to be happy. I know she did a number on you, but you have to move past that. She was at fault, not you,” he said sharply. I knew he and my family blamed Katy for what happened, but I knew the truth.

I wasn’t enough. I wasn’t what she wanted. Over the years, I hardly dated, my days consumed by being a new father, but deep down I believed something was missing in me that made her leave.

“Miles?”

Clearing my throat to suppress those dark emotions, I answered, “Yeah, still here. I failed her. Failed MJ. I couldn’t keep our family together. Not sure what I deserve after that.”

“I hate when you talk like this. How could you have failed when she was the one who left? Chose to leave, chose divorce instead of fighting for you and her daughter? That’s on her, not you,” he growled.

“She was the one who hardly checked in with you and MJ for years. Has she even gotten any better?”

“Some, I guess. Her parents still check in on Christmas and her birthday, but of course, they sided with Katy.” I rubbed my temple, a headache starting from the tension of this conversation. “Listen, I need to get back to work. A coder called out, and I’m behind already.”

“Sorry, man, didn’t mean to upset you,” he said, his voice lowering.

“Well, thanks for having my back. Hug Sofia for me. Oh, the plan is still to come back here after the trip to Positano to have the baby, right?”

Like sunshine cracking through dark clouds, his voice brightened. “Yes and I can’t wait. I can’t believe it sometimes. This joy that I didn’t expect. You’ll find it too. I’m sure of it. Maybe even with the lovely Vicky,” he teased with a wicked laugh. I could almost see his eyebrows waggling.

I hung up on him before he could go any further.

Opening the coding file on my laptop, I couldn’t stop my mind from pulling the conversation with Katy from the deep recesses. She had said it was all a mistake. I winced at the memory.

That word stayed with me for a long time. I couldn’t shield my broken heart from the pain it caused me, but I’d never let MJ feel that way about herself.

I leaned back in my chair, making it squeak, trying to push the unpleasant memories from my mind.

Attempting to stem the tide of those overwhelming feelings, I let my brain snag on Luke’s other comment about Vicky.

Just for a moment. Can’t do any harm, right?

The woman in question was beautiful, with a smile that lit up a room. The first one in years that seemed to warm my cold, dead heart thanks to my ex. There was only one problem. Well, maybe two.

First, Victoria Lazzara was eight years younger than I was. Second, she lived in Rome. It was all for the best because having a chance with Vicky was never going to happen. Not in a million years. Not if her brother had anything to do with it.