Chapter 25
PAIGE
The shrill ring of Alex's phone jolts me out of a dead sleep. I groan, burying my face in the pillow as he fumbles for the device on the nightstand.
"'Lo?" he mumbles, his voice rough with sleep.
I feel him go tense beside me, his body stiffening as he listens to whoever is on the other end of the line.
"What? When?" A pause, a sharp inhale. "No, no...I'll be right there. Just...just hold on, okay? I'm on my way."
He hangs up, already throwing back the covers and stumbling out of bed. I sit up, blinking blearily in the dim light of the bedroom.
"Alex? What's going on?"
He turns to me, his face pale and his eyes wild. "It's my mom. She...she took a turn for the worse. They don't think she has much time."
My heart clenches, a cold fist of dread squeezing my lungs. "Oh god, Alex. I'm so sorry."
He shakes his head, already pulling on a pair of jeans. "I have to go. I have to...I have to be with her."
I nod, sliding out of bed and reaching for my own clothes. "Of course. I'm coming with you."
He pauses, his shirt halfway over his head. “Paige, you don't have to..."
I silence him with a look, tugging my shirt down. "She's family, Alex. Your family is my family. I'm coming with you."
His eyes soften, a sheen of tears making them glitter in the low light. "Thank you," he whispers, his voice cracking on the words. "I don't...I don't think I can do this alone."
I cross to him, taking his face in my hands. "You're not alone, Alex. I'm here. I'm always here."
He closes his eyes, leaning into my touch. "I love you so fucking much, you know that?"
I smile tremulously, brushing a kiss over his lips. "I know. I love you too. Now come on, let's go be with your mom."
The hospice room is quiet, the only sound the steady beep of the heart monitor and the rasp of Karen's breathing. She looks small in the bed, her skin pale and papery, her body little more than a collection of sharp angles and jutting bones.
But when she sees us, her face lights up, a smile transforming her sunken features. "There's my boy," she rasps, holding out a trembling hand. "And Paige, my favorite daughter-in-law."
I blush, taking her hand gently in mine. "Not quite yet, Karen. But someday, I hope."
She winks, her eyes twinkling with mischief. "Hear that, Alex? Better get a ring on it before some other strapping young lad snatches her up."
Alex huffs a laugh, leaning down to press a kiss to her forehead. "Don't worry, Mom. I'm not letting this one go."
Karen hums, patting his cheek. "Good. Because I like her. She's good for you, baby. Keeps you on your toes."
I grin, winking at Alex over her head. "It's a full time job, but somebody's got to do it."
He rolls his eyes, but he's smiling. "Ganging up on me, I see how it is. I thought you were supposed to be on my side, partner."
I shrug, unrepentant. "Sorry, babe. Girl code trumps partner code."
Karen wheezes a laugh, her grip tightening on my hand. "Oh, I like you. You're a firecracker, just like I was at your age."
I soften, squeezing her fingers gently. "I learned from the best, Karen. You're an inspiration, you know that? The way you've handled all of this, with such grace and strength...I hope I can be half the woman you are someday."
Tears shimmer in her eyes, her smile tremulous. "Oh, honey. You already are. Don't you doubt that for a second."
I blink back my own tears, my throat tight with emotion. This woman, this incredible, indomitable woman, has welcomed me into her life, into her heart, without reservation. Has treated me like the daughter she never had, right from the start.
And now I'm losing her. We're all losing her.
But I'll be damned if I let her go without a fight. Without showing her how much she means to me, to all of us.
"Alex," I say, my voice steady despite the shaking in my hands. "I think it's time we moved your mom in with us. So she can be comfortable, surrounded by the people who love her."
He stares at me, his eyes wide and shocked. "Paige, are...are you sure? I don't want to put you out, or make you uncomfortable..."
I shake my head, cutting him off. "I've never been more sure of anything. This is where she belongs, Alex. With her family. With us."
Karen makes a soft, choked sound, her hand tightening on mine. "Paige, sweetheart...you don't have to do this. I'm fine here, really."
I turn to her, my expression fierce. "I know I don't have to, Karen. I want to. You've been there for me, for us, through everything. Let us be there for you now. Please."
She stares at me for a long moment, her eyes searching mine. Then, slowly, she nods, a single tear slipping down her cheek. "Okay," she whispers, her voice thick with emotion. "Okay, I'll come stay with you. On one condition."
I raise an eyebrow, bracing myself for a battle. "Name it."
She grins, sudden and wicked. "You let me help plan the wedding. I've got some ideas that will knock your socks off."
A startled laugh bursts out of me, tears and joy mingling in a heady rush. "Deal," I say, leaning down to press a kiss to her cheek. "But no doves, okay? Alex is terrified of birds."
"Hey!" he protests, but he's laughing too, his eyes bright with unshed tears. "That was one time, and that seagull was clearly out for blood."
Karen chuckles, shaking her head fondly. "My boy, the bird-phobe. How did I raise such a wuss?"
Alex gasps, clutching his chest in mock-affront. "Wuss? Excuse you, I am a paragon of masculine bravery."
I snort, poking him in the side. "Says the man who screamed like a little girl when he saw a spider in the bathtub last week."
He pouts, crossing his arms over his chest. "It was a big spider. And it was hairy. Forgive me for being startled by an unexpected arachnid invasion during my morning ablutions."
Karen and I dissolve into giggles, leaning on each other for support. And god, it feels good to laugh. To find a moment of levity in the midst of all this heartache and fear.
It feels like hope, shining bright in the darkness.
"Careful, careful! Watch the corner, Alex, you're going to take out the lamp!"
I direct from the doorway as Alex and Sam maneuver Karen's hospital bed into the spare room of our condo. It's been a whirlwind few days, getting everything set up and ready for her arrival, but finally, finally, she's here.
Home, where she belongs.
"Paige, I swear to god, if you don't stop backseat bed-moving, I'm going to lose it," Alex grunts, sweat beading on his brow as he and Sam lift and pivot.
I roll my eyes, hands on my hips. "Well excuse me for wanting to make sure our home remains intact. That lamp is from Pottery Barn, I'll have you know."
"Ooh, Pottery Barn," Sam mocks, his voice strained with exertion. "Aren't we fancy?"
I narrow my eyes at him, fighting back a smile. "Watch it, Kim. Don't think I won't rescind your CupidCode partnership over a little lamp slander."
He gasps, nearly dropping his end of the bed. "You wouldn't!"
Alex groans, readjusting his grip. "Sam, focus! Lifting now, banter later."
"Fine, fine. Pushy bastard."
I grin, stepping back to let them pass. "Uh, that's Mr. Pushy Bastard to you, good sir. I didn't put a ring on it so you could disrespect my man."
Alex pauses, his expression going soft and gooey. "Babe. You really need to stop saying things that make me want to kiss you when my arms are full of medical equipment."
I wink, blowing him a kiss. "Hurry up and put that bed down, and I'll give you a lot more than a kiss, Mr. Reynolds-Spencer."
He makes a strangled sound in the back of his throat, nearly tripping over his own feet in his haste to get the bed settled. Sam rolls his eyes, muttering something that sounds suspiciously like "horny bastards" under his breath.
Finally, after much grunting and swearing and only one near-death experience with the lamp, the bed is in place, complete with fresh sheets and a colorful quilt Jamie brought over.
"There," Alex says, wiping his brow with the back of his hand. "Fit for a queen."
I smile, leaning into his side. "She's going to love it. You did good, babe."
He presses a kiss to my temple, his arm coming around my waist. "We did good, Paige. I couldn't have done any of this without you."
I turn in his arms, looping my own around his neck. "There's nothing I wouldn't do for you, Alex. For our family. You know that, right?"
His eyes search mine, dark and intense. "I do know that. And I hope you know...it goes both ways. I would move heaven and earth for you, Paige Reynolds. For the family we've built together."
Tears sting my eyes, my heart so full it feels like it might burst. "I do know that. I've never doubted it, not for a second."
He smiles, soft and sweet, and leans in to brush his lips over mine. It's a gentle kiss, a promise and a vow all in one.
A kiss that tastes like forever.
"Not to interrupt this touching moment," Sam drawls from the doorway, "but the guest of honor has arrived, and I'm pretty sure she's going to want to see her new digs."
We break apart, grinning sheepishly. "Duty calls," Alex sighs, taking my hand and tugging me towards the living room.
And there she is. Karen, sitting in her wheelchair with a bright smile on her face, looking for all the world like she's ready for a grand adventure.
"Well?" she demands, her eyes sparkling. "Is my suite fit for a queen, or what?"
Alex laughs, bending down to press a smacking kiss to her cheek. "Only the best for you, Mom. But I'll warn you now, the turn-down service here is pretty lacking."
She swats at him, chuckling. "Guess I'll just have to rough it, then. It's a hardship, but I think I'll manage."
I grin, kneeling down to take her hands in mine. "Welcome home, Mom. We're so happy you're here."
Her fingers tighten on mine, her eyes going soft and misty. "There's nowhere else I'd rather be, sweetheart. Nowhere in the world."
And looking around at these people, this cobbled-together family of choice and chance, I know exactly what she means.
Because no matter what comes next, no matter what fate has in store...this is where I belong. Where we all belong.
Together, come hell or high water.
Just like it was always meant to be.
"Alex. Alex, wake up."
I shake his shoulder urgently, my heart pounding in my throat. He comes awake with a snort, blinking up at me in the darkness.
"Paige? What's wrong?"
I swallow hard, my voice shaking. "It's your mom. I went to check on her, and...and she's not breathing, Alex. I think...I think it's time."
He's out of bed in an instant, racing down the hall to Karen's room with me hot on his heels. We burst through the door, and there she is, lying still and peaceful in her bed.
But her chest isn't moving. And the room is so, so quiet.
"Mom?" Alex's voice is small, broken. He takes her hand, pressing his fingers to her wrist. "Mommy?"
I stand frozen, tears streaming down my face as I watch the horrible realization dawn on him. As he crumples, folding over her body with a keening cry that rips my heart in two.
"No, no, no," he sobs, his shoulders shaking with the force of his grief. "Please, Mom. Please don't leave me. I'm not ready, I'm not..."
I go to him, wrapping my arms around him from behind and pressing my face into his neck. "I'm here," I whisper, my own tears soaking into his shirt. "I'm here, Alex. I've got you."
He turns in my arms, burying his face in my chest as he weeps. I hold him close, rocking him gently as my own heart shatters into a million pieces.
This incredible woman, this force of nature who loved so fiercely, so completely...she's gone. And she's taken a piece of us with her, a piece we'll never get back.
But as I stand there, holding the man I love as he falls apart, I realize something. Something that hits me like a bolt of lightning, like a revelation from on high.
I was never the robot my ex claimed me to be. I was never cold, or heartless, or incapable of feeling.
Because this, right here? This tidal wave of grief and love and raw, aching humanity crashing over me?
This is the most human thing I've ever felt. The most real, the most true.
And it's because of her. Because of Karen, and Alex, and this beautiful, messy, imperfect family we've built together.
They taught me how to love. How to feel, down to my bones.
And that's a gift I'll carry with me, always. A piece of her, living on in my heart.
In all of our hearts.
Forever and always, just like she promised.
I press a kiss to Alex's hair, my tears mingling with his. "She loved you so much, Alex. More than anything. And she knew...she knew how much you loved her too."
He nods against my chest, his breath hitching. "I did. I do. God, Paige...what am I going to do without her?"
I tighten my arms around him, fierce and unyielding. "You're going to live, Alex. You're going to love, and laugh, and build the life she always wanted for you. The life she knew you were meant for."
I pull back, cupping his face in my hands and staring into his bloodshot, devastated eyes. "And I'm going to be right there with you, every step of the way. We all will. You're not alone, Alex. You never will be."
He stares at me for a long, endless moment, fresh tears spilling down his cheeks. Then he nods, leaning forward to rest his forehead against mine.
"Okay," he whispers, his voice raw and ragged. "Okay, Paige. Let's...let's do this. Together."
I smile through my tears, pressing a soft kiss to his lips. "Together," I agree, pouring every ounce of love and strength I have into the word.
Into him, into us. Into the future we'll build, side by side.
Just like she would have wanted.
Just like it was always meant to be.