23. Like The Devil
LIKE THE DEVIL
“I’m surprised to hear from you again so soon,” Coy said two days later. “You must really have a lot of time on your hands.”
“Hardly,” he said. Though it was a lie because he had more time than he’d had in years.
“Zac is in the house with Angel, but I can go get them.”
“Are you on the beach in front of the fire by yourself?” he asked. Spencer loved doing that at Coy’s house.
The two of them chilling in front of the flames, the sky dark, the sounds of the water lapping close by.
“Not on the beach,” he said. “On the lower deck with the firepit.”
“Still sounds good. Did you have a long day that you’re by yourself there and not with your wife?”
“She’ll be out soon. Zac wouldn’t go down and when I offered to do it, she said I make it worse.”
He laughed. “Because you play with him more than my sister does.”
“Not true. She does too, but just not the same things. Zac likes Daddy and me time.”
The smile filled his face. “I bet he does.”
“Do you need best friend time?” Coy asked, the humor riding high.
“Maybe,” he said.
“It sounds it. Tell me what’s going on. Is it the work? The job?”
“Yes and no,” he said. He had to figure out what to say.
They’d said this would be a secret, but London had told her sister. Coy was the closest thing he had to a brother. And someone who had kind of been in his shoes.
If anyone would understand what he was struggling with it was his brother-in-law.
“I’m all ears.”
“The work is great. I’m busy. Still a lot to learn, but nothing I can’t handle.”
“I don’t think anyone doubted it.”
“I’m not sure how to say this without coming right out with it. We’ve got this vendor. London Westerly. She’s West’s first cousin. Kind of one of those business partnerships more than a vendor. She and her twin are consultants.”
“Okay,” Coy said.
“She’s getting under every single one of my nerves.”
Coy burst out laughing. “No one gets under your skin but me at times. And I do it on purpose when we know we are relaxing.”
“She’s got the talent.”
“Is she attractive?”
“Stunning. Tall. Almost blonde. Blue eyes. Looks like an angel but comes at you like the devil.”
Coy whistled low. “Ah. So that’s the problem.”
“It’s not a problem.” He let the words drag out. “It’s an…irritation.”
“Right,” Coy said. “And I’m only mildly fond of my wife when she’s like that.”
He rubbed a hand over his face. Coy was no idiot.
Angel got under Coy’s skin too. That was why he was talking with his best friend.
Not just for female advice—which he even hated that he might need. But the whole workplace situation.
“I’m serious. She pushed every button I didn’t know I had. She questions everything. Challenges every call I make. And she does it looking like she knows exactly how to make me lose my mind.”
“Sounds like she’s good at her job.”
“She’s incredible at her job,” he admitted, his voice dropping. “It’s infuriating. She doesn’t always have the smoothest of approaches, but she can admit when she’s wrong and that’s huge.”
Most people couldn’t.
London almost always knew the exact moment she overstepped, then backed up and tried to correct before she made the next move.
“Uh-huh. And you’re calling me because…?”
Because he needed to say it out loud. Because he needed someone to tell him what the hell to do with this storm brewing in his chest.
“Because I don’t want to screw up,” he said quietly. “This is the first time in a long time that I feel like I’m heading down the right road with my career. And the last thing I can afford is being distracted.”
Coy was silent for a beat.
“Is that what she is?” Coy asked. “A distraction? On top of being an irritation?”
He hesitated too long. “Yes,” he lied.
“You sure?” Coy asked. “Because the way you just talked about her sounds less like distraction and more like gravitational pull.”
Fuck! He didn’t know why he was trying to make this out to be more than it was. Or more like less than it was.
Maybe because he didn’t know what was going on in her mind, but hearing her voice a few days ago, the vulnerability and uncertainty spoke volumes.
“Coy—”
“Hey, I get it,” Coy cut in. “Strong, smart, gorgeous woman who stands toe-to-toe with you? Hard not to notice. Harder not to feel something when you do notice.”
He didn’t respond. He couldn’t.
“It doesn’t feel right to jeopardize something we’ve both worked hard for. She’s feeling the same way. We’ve talked some.”
“You’re not doing anything wrong,” Coy said. “You’re human.”
“That’s what I’m afraid of.”
Coy laughed softly. “Does she push you because she’s trying to get under your skin, or because she’s trying to get closer?”
His breath caught. “That’s part of the problem. I don’t know. I don’t think she does either.”
“But you want to.”
Spencer closed his eyes, his head on the back of the chair. “Yeah,” he said. “I want to. But again, so much is at stake. And during the day, when we are working, she’s like a wildcat that I don’t want to tame. Or didn’t at first. I wanted to run away.”
“And now you’re ready to make her a pet?”
The humor in Coy’s voice had him laughing. Just like their college days, bantering back and forth to cheer the other up.
“Something like that. I know that she’s struggling the same as me. Not just with the work part separating things, but letting her guard down.”
“You don’t let yours down either.”
“And it sucks to feel as if I am.” Especially wondering if this was a huge mistake he should nip in the bud now.
“Well,” Coy said. “Then maybe this isn’t a problem. Maybe it’s the start of something you didn’t expect.”
He swallowed hard. “Or maybe it’s what ruins everything I’ve worked for.”
Coy snorted. “Spencer, most of the best things in life start exactly like that. Trust me. I know that better than anyone. You know the guilt I carried.”
“And I didn’t make it any better.”
He remembered exactly how he felt when he found out not only were his best friend and sister dating, but expecting a child.
He’d lost his shit. Really lost it.
Made demands they marry right away.
Everyone thought he was nuts.
Looking back, he knew he was. But he hated to lose control of anything and it felt as if everything around him was crashing.
His job was just showing signs of coming apart. His one happy thought was that his sister was on her own and being watched over just as well as he would have done.
Not much different from what he might be doing to London.
Wonder if her brothers would feel the same way.
Or if his bosses would?
Just another thing to worry about.
“You didn’t, but it all worked out,” Coy said. “What is it you want? Ask yourself. In a perfect world, what do you see happening?”
“I see us working together peacefully.”
“Get that out of your head. It won’t happen. It’s not even realistic. Not the way you describe her personality. Do you think Angel and I work peacefully? Not even close, and we share an office. And it sounds as if our personalities are closer together than yours and London’s.”
“Fair point. That just tells you how messed up I am in the head to think something that ridiculous.”
“Back to my question. Be realistic. What do you see if you could picture it perfectly, but being something that could happen?”
“That the way we interact outside of work, we could during the day.”
“What’s different?” Coy asked, sounding confused.
“Oh, I forgot to tell you. While we are working, her back is up nonstop. It’s as if she is just waiting for someone to doubt her and her ability. To put her in a slot. She comes out swinging before she says hi.”
“That’s annoying and hard to be around.”
“It is. I’m kind of used to it.”
“How is she outside of the office?”
“Relaxed. Funny. Outgoing. Someone I’d love to be with and spend time with. But then morning rolls around and there is that prickly side again.”
“On purpose?” Coy asked.
“I don’t know. I’m still trying to figure that out before we go much further.”
“So you haven’t had sex yet?” Coy asked, laughing.
“You know I’m not going to answer that.”
“Got it. But it’s more than kissing. Because I know you. You wouldn’t be calling asking for advice if you had already made the dive.”
He let out a laugh. “Something like that. I don’t know what I need or want. I just know I’m not ready to walk away from her. Even if I wanted to, I couldn’t. We work together. It’s not like I can tell Braylon what is going on. That’s all I need. Him thinking I’m taking advantage of his cousin.”
“From the sounds of it, I don’t think anyone could take advantage of her. Or maybe it’s happened before and she fights really hard not to let it be a repeat performance.”
“Shit. I never thought of that.”
“Glad I could help somewhat.”
“You’re helping more than you realize with me just being able to talk it out.”
“Good to know. So what’s the next step? Or don’t you know? Do you see or talk daily? I didn’t have a break from your sister. Try fighting what you’re feeling day in and day out nonstop.”
“No, thank you. I haven’t seen her since Monday. Haven’t talked to her either.”
Which was another thing that bothered him.
Did she want them to have some kind of communication daily? They both had a job to do.
Both were busy.
It wasn’t like he wanted to see her daily. Which was a lie, because he kind of did.
“Which one of you is avoiding it?”
“Honestly, I’m not sure.”
“I’ve never known you to avoid anything before. Not sure why you are now. Unless you really don’t think it’s a good idea, because if you felt that deep enough, you would have walked away and you’re not, are you?”
“No. I can’t. I think I just needed someone to tell me it would be alright.”
“Dude. I can’t tell you that. It’s your life. Make it alright, and then you have to see if London is even on board.”
“That might be the hardest part of it all.”