Chapter 14
Devan
“ I ’m going to go get a few things from my car,” I announce to my family who all seem disinterested.
I peek over my shoulder to see if I’m being watched before I head toward the door, following Justin.
As I debate calling to him, the screen door behind me slams, and he turns.
My steps slow as he grins in the moonlight.
The floodlight near the garage comes on, bathing us both in bright illumination. And in that moment, I worry that I am being too forward. Maybe I should have stayed indoors.
Without a word, Justin steps from the bubble of light into the shadows at the end of the garage.
Before he disappears, I see him tip his head for me to follow.
I take one last look back at the house. The kitchen windows are open to the spring breeze.
They’re filled with a golden light, yet no one remains in the room.
They’ve moved on. If I were to guess, Dad is in the living room.
Mom is in her room, and Ricky is either with Dad or in his room.
Or he could still be complaining to Mom for giving me the extra room.
I walk carefully, the gravel sharp under my bare feet. I’m watching the ground, careful where I step as I slip behind the far end of the garage and run face-first into a brick wall. Strong hands reach out to steady me as I bounce backward.
Justin’s solid grasp of my arms keeps me from falling. I crane my neck upward until I see his eyes. In the kitchen I was noticing how blue they are. A deep cobalt reminding me of the summer sky. Now, they appear black, his pupils dilated in the darkness as his stare goes to my lips.
“I want to kiss you again,” he says, his deep voice rumbling through me.
“I won’t stop you.”
He turns us. In less than a second, my shoulders are against the garage. Justin’s hands are on either side of my face, and his solid body is in front of me. His masculine scent fills my senses as his gaze rakes over me.
Without a word, he takes my chin in his grasp.
Gentler than this morning, Justin moves slowly and deliberately, taking his time.
Butterfly kisses and nips pepper my lips, warming me from the inside. As my breathing hitches, his kisses become deeper. His lips take mine—consuming me. Justin’s actions are as if he’s starved for our connection.
His hunger is contagious.
I feel him everywhere. While it’s only a kiss, every cell within my body sparks to life, flickers igniting into flames.
When his tongue seeks entrance, I willingly part my lips.
It’s as his kisses leave my lips, moving to my neck, the sensitive skin behind my ear, and onto my collarbone that my fingers weave through his hair, and I push my hips toward his hard frame.
Justin sighs as he pulls back. With one hand on the wall, his other is caressing my arm. “How did you learn to kiss like that?” he asks, his lips quirking into a grin.
My pulse is too fast, and my nipples too hard.
Licking my lips, I grin. “I’ve never kissed like that before.”
“I don’t believe you.”
Reaching for his shirt, I lay my hand on his chest. “I’m always honest. It’s okay if you think I need more practice.”
His grin grows. “I think you’ve perfected the task, but I’m willing to help you out if you’re looking for a practice partner.”
“I am,” I say, pushing up on my tiptoes and meeting his lips with mine.
Justin spreads his legs, straddling mine. With his hands on my hips, he moves them higher, under my sweatshirt. My flesh is ultrasensitive to his touch. If he moves a few more inches, he’ll learn that I’m not wearing a bra.
However, his hands don’t move higher. His fingers splay on my lower back as his touch hovers in safe territory.
Safe isn’t the right word.
Having his hands on me, beneath my shirt is a whole new experience. I’m ultra-conscious of his touch. The coarseness of his fingers is like flint striking against steel. The temperature within me rises, yet he takes each step slow, not pushing me.
When he backs up, he grins. “For the record, I like your shorts.”
My cheeks grow warm. “I didn’t know you would be at dinner. I saw Dad and Ricky get out of the truck and assumed you didn’t want to be here.”
“I almost turned around.”
“Why?”
“Because, BK, you have me not thinking straight. On the way here, I almost stopped and picked daisies.”
I laugh. “I like daisies.”
His forehead drops to mine. “I’m out of my element.”
If this is out, I can’t imagine in.
“You seem rightfully qualified to be my kissing instructor.”
His chest moves as he takes deep breaths, and he runs a finger over my cheek. “I can’t believe this is you. You’re so beautiful.”
“I’m not sure if that’s a compliment.”
Justin swallows, his Adam’s apple bobbing. “It’s meant as one. I keep reminding myself that you’re…” He pauses. “That you’ve become more than Ricky’s little tagalong sister.”
“Tagalong?”
“Yeah,” he says with a smirk.
“Well, I have to remind myself that you’re more than Ricky’s know-it-all, grumpy friend.”
Justin takes a step back. “Is that what you think of me?”
“Past tense.” I quickly add, “You called me a tagalong. We’re even.”
His stare is penetrating as if he’s seeing behind my eyes into my soul. “I don’t feel like we’re even when I’m around you. I feel off-kilter.”
“I’m sure you’re more experienced at this than I am.”
Justin shakes his head. “I don’t recall ever feeling this way about a kiss. No one has ever annihilated my world with one kiss.”
Taking a deep breath, I ask, “What does this mean?”
He shakes his head. “I don’t know.”
Lowering my chin, I sigh. When I look up, Justin is staring into my eyes. “Please don’t be playing some kind of a joke.”
“What?” His eyes grow wide. “Devan, I swear. I’m not.”
“I don’t think I could take it.”
“Fuck,” he hisses as his palm cups my cheek. “I don’t know what else you think of me or remember, but I’m not that person. If anything, I’m worried how Ricky will take it if you want to see me…like for real.”
“Officially?”
Justin shrugs and nods.
I tip my head to his chest with my senses on high alert. The thumping of his heart, manly scent, solid muscular chest radiating warmth…the combination has me all jumbled. “Don’t hurt me.”
“That’s the last thing I want to do.”
Taking a deep breath, I smile. “When you’re ready to officially ask me, I’ll be waiting.” I take a step away and grin. “Don’t make me wait too long, Justin Sheers.”
With that, I hurry across the gravel to my car and grab two suitcases from the back seat. I’m up on the porch when I hear Justin’s truck door open. I turn in time to see him under the dome light. His auburn hair and scruff on his cheeks. His penetrating gaze, high cheekbones, and chiseled jaw.
My heart flutters at the thought of his kisses and touch.
It’s my mind that has questions and worries.
I’ve never gone all the way.
The fact that I’m a virgin sounds archaic. I know my friends have, and that’s fine. It’s not that I have some old-fashion morality code. I think I want it to be special.
As I’m carrying my suitcases up the stairs, I’m worried that I don’t know enough to keep a man like Justin Sheers happy.
Once I’m in my room with my door closed, I call Jill.
“Are you dying?” she asks in lieu of answering. “Why are you calling this late? Are your fingers broken? Text.”
“I don’t want any written record of this conversation,” I say softly.
Jill’s tone changes. “Oh, what are we going to talk about?”
“Sex.”
“Should it be a video call? Do we need props?”
A laugh comes as my response. “What if I waited too long? What if I’m terrible at this?”
“Okay,” Jill says. “I’m fully awake now. This? Did you see Justin again? Is he pushing you…? Talk to me.”
“Yes. He’s not. I think I need advice and help. That’s why I called.”