27. Emily
emily
“ W hat do you think about this?” I ask Ben, holding up a blown glass ornament in the shape of a penis. He looks at the item in my hand and shakes his head, chuckling softly under his breath.
We’re at the local farmer’s market I heard about when I was getting a cup of coffee at the cute coffee shop down the street known for its specialty lattes.
Today’s flavor of the day is peppermint mocha.
I’m taking small sips and browsing all the local shops.
Ben looks mildly bored, but he hasn’t complained, so I hope it’s not torturous to him.
Earlier this morning over breakfast, I mentioned to him that I wanted to check the market and see what all the fuss was about.
While I was at the sink washing the dishes, I felt his arms come around my shoulders, and he kissed the top of my head.
He squeezed me and told me to let him know when I was leaving.
I thought he had just wanted to know when I was out of the apartment, so when I announced I was leaving, I was shocked to find him dressed.
“I’ll drive.” He took my hand and drove us downtown, following the directions on my phone’s navigation system, and here we are.
Enjoying a lazy Sunday doing what I imagine couples who have been together for a while do.
I’ve passed by many hand-holding couples and some dragging a disgruntled husband, and it makes me wonder if Ben and I could ever get to this place where we’d be one of those hand-holding couples. Or, worse, the disgruntled duo.
I froze, lost in thought. If I really try, I can imagine the two of us together. The timing seems wrong, though. Maybe we could be happy together if we don’t bungle things up.
Or maybe, just maybe, the universe brought us together for this exact moment.
But am I ready to let someone into my heart again after what I just went through?
Could I trust anyone else ever again? I couldn’t imagine things ending badly with Ben and being forced to move.
Again. It would be like I’m back at square one.
Can I handle that? Is it worth the possible heartbreak?
My thoughts swirl in my head like a chaotic storm, a tempest of anxieties and uncertainties, leaving me disoriented and reeling.
The turbulence overwhelms my senses; each thought is a sharp gust of wind, tossing me about like a leaf in a storm.
I’m finding it hard to keep my cool amidst all the chaos.
I’m startled out of my thoughts when I feel Ben lift my chin with a light touch. I meet his worried gaze and give him a small smile.
“Hey, tiger. Lost in thought again? You okay, babe?”
My eyes widen slightly. Did he just call me babe?
“Um… yeah, I’m fine,” I lie through my teeth.
He looks at me suspiciously but doesn’t call me out before he grabs my hand to urge me along.
I hadn’t realized I had stopped walking and was standing in the middle of the walkway.
We leave after another hour. I purchased some earrings from a local jeweler and a new romance book that one of the book clubs on wheels was selling.
His hand, rough against mine, was a grounding, comforting presence. Like an anchor, it keeps me from floating away, a steady presence in my turbulent thoughts.
T hat night, after another home-cooked meal of shrimp and grits, courtesy of Ben’s surprising culinary skills, we both settle in to watch another movie on Netflix.
I’m lying down on one end of the couch with my sock-clad feet resting on Ben’s lap.
He has one hand resting on my leg, and the other is using the remote to flick through our options.
After what feels like hours later, we select an action movie featuring Jason Bourne.
As the movie starts, I wiggle on the couch to get comfortable, my foot accidentally brushing his half-erect cock. Geez, is he always hard?
He slaps his hand on my foot to stop me from further wiggling it and shoots me an amused stare.
“Careful, tiger, or we won’t be watching the movie after all.”
“Well, maybe I don’t want to watch the movie.
” My reply is sassy and taunting. I yelp when he yanks on my calf and drags me down to the couch so I’m closer to him.
He spreads my legs, leans over me, and settles his hips between my thighs.
My breath hitches, accelerating with the sudden closeness of his warm body; the woodsy scent of his cologne, sharp and intoxicating, makes my head swim.
“And what is it you want to do instead, hmmm?” He leans in and softly kisses my collarbone, making me whimper in response.
He slowly glides his lips across my pebbled skin.
I bare my neck in a silent plea for him to continue.
His tongue flicks out to lick the junction where my shoulder meets, and I gasp.
He hums his pleasure and continues his journey until he’s mere inches from my lips.
His forehead rests on mine, a silent moment of connection.
Our breaths mingle in the space between us, ragged and quick, creating a symphony of intimacy.
Exhilaration surges inside of me like a bright, fierce flame igniting within.
Burning away all of my doubts in the face of the unknown.
Come what may, I know with absolute certainty, a feeling as solid as the earth beneath us, that we were in this together.
I’m not sure whether it is one of us or both, but our lips meet like colliding storm clouds. My heart pounds loudly in my ears. I don’t know where he ends and I begin. I never want this moment to end.
Our tongues duel in a seductive dance for dominance, and I concede as he uses a rough hand to tip my head back to devour me.
I groan, and my roaming hands find themselves around his neck, buried tightly in his soft curls.
His kiss feels endless, and I’m lost in the abyss of pleasure.
Warmth pools at my center, and the resulting wetness would be embarrassing if I didn’t know how much it drives Ben wild.
He breaks off the kiss and bares my stomach, placing a soft kiss right below my navel.
He shoves my shirt up over my chest to expose my heaving breasts, nipples peaking from arousal.
His groan is the only answer I need to know if my small chest is a turn-on for him.
He pulls the cups of my bra down to expose one nipple before lurching up to capture the brown peak in his hot mouth.
“Oh, fuck!” I never realized my nipples were so sensitive as he sucks and laves at me.
After he’s satisfied that he’s given it enough attention, he pulls the cup from my other breast down and gives it the same attention.
I know that I’m soaked, and my skin feels too tight.
I need release, and I need to be filled.
There’s an emptiness in my core that only he can fill.
“Please, Ben.” My whispered pleas cause him to lift his head, and the look of pure hunger on his face breaks my resolve.
“Please what, tiger? What do you need?” His voice is husky from pleasure.
“Please, I need you.” His hum of satisfaction sets me at ease.
I know he wants this as much as I do, judging by the hard erection that’s tenting his pants.
He helps me out of my shirt and bra and sits back on his heels.
Slowly, he glides his fingertips to the waistband of my pants and inches them off my hips.
I bend my knees as he slips them off before tossing them to the side.
I’m left bare in my powder blue boy shorts.
His hungry gaze devours my almost nude body, and I would feel exposed if not for the voracity of his need.
After what feels like an eternity of us taking each other in, Ben reaches behind his neck and yanks his shirt off over his head. He pulls his sweatpants down before pausing and cursing softly.
“What’s the matter?” I sit up on my elbows to see him better. He has his head back, and the muscles in his neck are strained. He blows out a breath and looks at me apologetically. My heart plummets to my stomach.
“I don’t have any condoms.” His tone is remorseful.
I bite my lower lip as I consider our options. “I’m clean, and I’m on birth control… I mean, if you’re comfortable…”
His gaze intensifies as he studies me.
“I got tested a few weeks ago before we moved in and haven’t been with anyone since. I’m clean if you’re sure about this.”
I nod my head, and suddenly, he pulls me toward him, gripping my outer thighs so I’m flat on my back again.
My underwear is gone before I know it. He rears up over me with arms braced on either side of my head.
Our chests are millimeters from touching.
The air crackles with unspoken tension, a palpable energy humming between us, the silence punctuated by the rapid beat of my heart.
He lowers his upper body down slowly as if he is afraid that any sudden movement would send me running away from him.
He rests a forearm by my head and uses the other to guide the head of his cock at my slick entrance.
The heat of his cock begging for entry sends another rush of arousal to my center. He rubs his cock up and down my slit.
“You’re so wet for me. My cock is soaked in your juices, and I’m not even inside you yet,” he growled. “You sure? Last chance.”
I wrap my arms around his back and bring my legs to wrap around his hips, giving him no room to escape.
“Yes, I’m sure. I want you inside me. Now,” I demand. I’m lost in the sexual haze that’s enveloped us both.
He guides the tip of his cock back to my entrance, and my hips lift automatically as he enters me in one swift movement.
I gasp at the sudden intrusion, and Ben groans.
He drops his forehead to mine, our quickened breaths mingling between us.
He leans down and kisses my lips sweetly as he lets my body adjust to his intrusion.
I feel so full, and I never realized how empty I felt until this moment.
“Ready, tiger?” he asks gruffly before slowly retreating.
I moan as he pumps back into me, and my legs climb higher around his waist to make more room for him.
His pace quickens, and I match his thrusts with equal vehemence.
Our moans of pleasure mix in with the movie, and I’m glad for the background noise, as I’m sure the downstairs neighbor can hear us.
“Fuck, you feel so good around my cock.” Ben hits a sensitive spot when he thrusts hard, and my hips arch as I gasp in response.
“Oh god. I think I’m going to come.”
“Come on my cock, baby.”
He maintains a relentless pace, his cock and pelvis hitting at just the right angle.
The pressure intensifies to a blistering height, and I scream in ecstasy as my core clenches around his cock in an earth-shattering orgasm.
My legs shake from the intensity, and Ben continues his pace until the last of the aftershocks are gone.
“Fuck, that was hot,” he groans and changes his angle so he’s somehow buried even deeper than I thought possible. “Give me one more, baby.”
My nails rake down his back, my head shaking side to side as I feel the telltale signs of another rapidly approaching orgasm.
His fingers find my clit. The touch sends me hurdling over the precipice.
My body seizes with another orgasm. Ben’s hips stutter jerkily as I milk his cock.
He lets out a heavy groan as he comes. The sensation of him coming inside of me makes my muscles contract around him.
Almost like my body was trying to squeeze every last drop out of his hard cock.
When my soul returns to my body, I realize Ben has me cradled in his chest with one arm around my shoulders and his head resting next to my ear. We’re both still breathing heavily, and I relax my tight hold on his back.
“Wow.”
He lifts his head, looks at me for bated breath, and then chuckles softly. “Yeah. Wow.”
He separates our bodies gingerly, and I whimper as his body slips out of mine, already missing his fullness. I startle in awareness as I feel his cum leaking out of me. My eyes are wide with panic, but before I can move, Ben grabs his discarded shirt and cleans me up with rapt attention.
“Mmm… I love seeing my cum dripping out of this needy pussy. I might have to fill it up again just to see this every time.” I flush with both heat and embarrassment.
Why does that turn me on so much? The thought of having someone come inside me before was always disgusting to me.
Logan always pulled out and came on my belly or back, but he never dared to come inside of me.
I’m surprised by how wet and sticky everything feels, but knowing that it turns Ben on makes me eager for it to happen again.
This is probably some kind of kink that I haven’t read about yet, but I’ll need to find some new reading material, STAT!
Once I’m cleaned up to Ben’s satisfaction, he moves to get up but tells me not to move a muscle.
He covers me with a blanket draped over the side of the couch and disappears to the bathroom.
I hear the water running before he returns with a wet towel in one hand.
He moves the blanket so I’m bared to him again before using the warmed towel to clean between my legs with tenderness.
I gasp and arch away when his hands brush my overly sensitive clit.
He covers my body with the blanket again and grabs the dirty shirt.
“Stay here,” he instructs as he disappears around the corner.
I’m lying naked on the couch with a blanket to keep me warm in the most amazing post-coital fog of my life.
Ben comes back, scoops me up in his arms, and heads to my bedroom.
He’s pulled the covers back and lays me down gently before climbing in.
I fall asleep to the sound of his heartbeats, and I feel like the luckiest person in the world.