Chapter Seventeen
V ickie had only worked her new schedule for a short time, but she could already tell it was going to take some getting used to. Last night when she’d finally gotten home, she’d been exhausted. But that made her enjoy the first day of her three day weekend even more.
She’d spent a few days thinking about Thatcher’s project and Dawn’s advice that she should work with him. Dialing his number had been tough, but she was proud of herself for going through with it. Especially when he’d tried to make a bumbling apology. She’d almost felt sorry for him. Almost. And saying that she’d had somewhere she needed to be was true. She’d needed to be home in her pajamas, not on a faux date.
She looked again at the calendar in her kitchen. Normally, she loved looking at the brightly colored pictures of Tuscany scattered around the edge of the calendar. But now all she could focus on was today’s date and what it signified. She knew there was another phone call she had to make today and it wasn’t going to be an easy one.
Exactly a year ago, her friend Ainsley Davis’ husband Brad had been killed in an accident. Ainsley had worked as a park ranger at the Grand Canyon, and Brad had served as a fire fighter. As would be expected, the loss had been devastating. Brad and Ainsley had been married for five years and his accident had been just after they’d learned Ainsley was finally pregnant.
Vickie stared at the phone. She knew nothing she could say to her friend would make the hurt go away, but she also knew that making the phone call was important. She hit the button and listened to the ringing.
“Hello.” Ainsley’s voice was shaky.
“Hey.” Vickie carried the phone into the living room and settled onto the couch. “I thought I’d check to see how you were doing today.”
Ainsley sighed. “I didn’t know it would be so hard. You always think of anniversaries as being happy occasions. But this particular one is almost more than I can bear.”
Vickie’s eyes filled with tears. “I’m so sorry. I’ve been praying hard for you lately, that you could somehow find some peace today.”
“Thanks. I know that you and Kristy both keep me in your prayers, and I can’t tell you how much that means to me.”
“Are you still staying at your parents’ house?” Ainsley had taken a leave of absence from her job and moved back in with her parents after Brad’s death. She’d decided to remain there for the duration of her pregnancy. But Faith would be four months old soon.
“I’m still staying with them. I guess that seems crazy, huh? I’m a grown woman with a child.” She sighed. “But I’m terrified of being in a house alone. Isn’t that silly? Ever since Brad’s accident, I’ve been surrounded by people. I guess I’m afraid of what will happen when that isn’t the case anymore.”
“Well, I know your parents love having you and Faith.” Vickie knew Ainsley’s family well enough to know that they’d probably be thrilled if she never left. Her friend had one of those large tightly knit families that Vickie had always admired. They’d offered Ainsley a tremendous amount of support over the past year.
“They do. And with the basement addition, it’s kind of like having my own little apartment. Dad turned into quite the handyman before Faith was born and added a bathroom and a little kitchen area. So it really is nice, plus I don’t feel like I’m imposing on them too much. And they’ve all been such a help with Faith.”
“Is she finally sleeping through the night?”
“Yes, thank goodness. I was beginning to think it would never happen. But she’s turned into such a good little sleeper. And you know I’ve always had insomnia, so she must’ve taken after her daddy.. .” Her voice trailed off.
“I hope you’re getting some rest, too.” Ainsley had always been a troubled sleeper, even years ago when they’d worked together as seasonal rangers at Shiloh. It hadn’t been unusual to get up in the night and find her in the living room reading or watching TV.
“I’m trying. And I’m about to start back to work, which will either be really good or really bad.” She laughed. “I guess it could go either way. It will be good to get back to a routine, but I hate the thought of leaving Faith, even for just a few hours.” She heaved a great sigh. “This was not part of our plan, you know. Brad and I always figured that once we had children, I’d stay home with them. I always thought about homeschooling our kids so I could put my education degree to use.”
Vickie was silent. She’d known that was their plan and she was so sorry for her friend’s pain. She sensed that a change in topic was needed. “Have you talked to Kristy lately? It sounds like their wedding plans are finally coming together.”
“She actually called earlier today.” Ainsley said.
Vickie was impressed. She’d figured she’d need to text her a reminder of what today was, but it sounded like Kristy had remembered. She wasn’t big on planning or remembering dates, so for years they’d fallen into a pattern where Vickie would call or text her reminders about important occasions. “Good deal. I talked to her a couple of days ago. It looks like next month we’re going to be hitting the beach for a wedding. You are going to be able to come, aren’t you?”
“I wouldn’t miss it. And Faith will be old enough to travel then. I can’t wait for you guys to meet her.”
“I can’t wait to meet her, either. And to see you in person. I can’t believe the three of us haven’t been together since your baby shower last March.”
“I know. And hopefully by the wedding date, I’ll have lost the rest of my baby weight. I haven’t seen the dresses yet, but if you get any input please make sure she chooses one that is ‘new mommy friendly’.”
“Will do.” Vickie chuckled.
They said their goodbyes and Vickie clicked off the phone. She sank back onto the couch. Their lives certainly hadn’t turned out the way they’d imagined back when they were seasonal rangers together. Still though, she clung to the belief that God had a plan for her life. Why was that so hard sometimes? She’d spent years trying to be patient and trying to understand what that plan was. But she knew that often she was guilty of plunging ahead, trying to forge her own path with little regard for what He might want.
She picked up her Bible from the coffee table and flipped to the first chapter of 1 Peter. She read and then re-read verse seven. Cast all your anxiety on Him because He cares for you . So often, she was tempted to worry, and instead of casting her anxiety on God, she let it eat away at her. It was so easy to focus on her problems rather than focusing on God. She sighed. It was time to make some changes.