Chapter 22
Finding a place to rent the next day was nearly impossible. Contracts had to be signed months in advance, or at least a few weeks. I realized really quickly that I was doomed.
I took out my phone, which had just finished charging through my cigarette lighter, and pressed on Emily's contact.
"I thought you'd never call," Emily said when she picked up on the second ring.
"Hey, sorry it's been a minute since we've talked."
"Don't worry about it. I've been busy too. What's new?"
I paused. It felt like two years had passed since we spoke last. I had a lot to update her on.
I decided to start with the news that felt the most alarming. Get the worst over with first.
"I'm homeless right now."
"What?" Emily’s high-pitched voice made me pull the phone away from my ear a bit. "What do you mean, homeless?"
"Well, the cabin has mice, and it turns out I can't live there. The whole thing probably needs to be torn down."
"You're kidding," Emily gasped in shock. "Oh, Hope. I'm so sorry. Do you need help? Do you need me to come get you?"
"No, I’m okay. I'm just staying in my car right now." I propped my feet up on the console, trying to find a more comfortable position, but I failed.
"Have you looked at rental properties yet?"
"Lots of places," I sighed. Ever since I'd gotten off work the day before, I'd been sitting in my car, scrolling through listings. Renting was freaking expensive. And not only that, most of the contracts didn’t start until the first of the month.
That was still a week away. "It's been pretty difficult finding anything I can move into tomorrow. "
Emily's voice was still thick with concern. “Do you have money to stay in a hotel? I worry about you, Hope. You're not exactly the type to camp out.”
“I’ll have you know I've been doing just fine camping out,” I huffed, adjusting my position for the millionth time in an attempt to get the feeling back into my left butt cheek.
“I really don’t want to waste money on a hotel.
I desperately need to start saving again.
If I stay somewhere for a whole week, I'll blow everything I’ve earned so far. ”
“Earned?” Emily asked, picking up on the word all too quickly.
“So, I also started working for Jay,” I added hesitantly.
“Oh my gosh. You actually took him up on the offer!” she was back to yelling again.
“Yeah, I figured I didn’t have much of a choice.”
“Okay, wow, so a bunch of stuff has happened since we last talked. What else?”
A brief silence spread over the line, and Dr. Jay came to mind as I looked out at the dark lake glimmering through the trees outside my car windows. If I could see just a little farther beyond the peaks of the dark pines, I'd catch sight of Jay’s cabin.
“Dr. Jay offered to rent me his apartment above his garage.”
I heard a choking sound on the other end of the line.
“Wait—what? He has a rental? How much is he asking for a month?”
“I don't know. I didn't ask. I turned him down so quickly he didn't have time to give me details.” I paused. “But he did say he could give me a discount.”
“Hope, why wouldn't you take him up on the offer?”
“He's my boss and my neighbor now! It would be so weird.”
“Hope, you'd be his tenant. It's not like you'd be sleeping in his bed. You'd have your own place.”
My face suddenly got hot, and surely my cheeks had turned pink. For some reason, the mention of Jay’s bedroom and the thought of sleeping in his bed had me all sorts of flustered. Why couldn't Emily have used a different example?
"Still—" I said, reaching out to fiddle with the seatbelt that was right next to my face. "He's a dentist, and I can't get past it."
"Hope, this fear you have…"
I cut her off. "I’m not afraid of him."
"Then what?" Emily fired back.
"I’m—" I didn’t know how to put it into words. "—afraid of what he could be."
The line went silent again, and I could tell that Emily was contemplating my confession.
"There is only one way to stop fearing what he could be," Emily said quietly through the line.
I didn’t respond. I felt like a stubborn child and even pouted a little like one.
"You have to give him a chance. That’s the only way you’ll ever know if he’s like the rest of them."
I closed my eyes, and for some reason, tears pricked the corners of my eyes. I always got hurt when I let myself have expectations. I was tired, and I honestly didn’t know if I could keep getting hurt.
"Think about it," Emily said. "It would save you a few sleepless nights in the car."
I was really missing a bed at that moment. I sighed and turned onto my other side and subsequently knocked my knee on the center console.
I bit my lip to keep from groaning.
"I’ll think about it. I love you, Em. Thanks for talking to me." It was said through gritted teeth.
"We’ll talk again soon?"
"Yeah, we’ll talk soon. Love ya."
"Love ya."
I hung up and let my phone fall onto my chest. For a moment, I just sat there, stretched awkwardly across the backseat of my car. The sun was coming up over the pines now, warming the inside of the car and reminding me I had somewhere to be.
The Wellness Fair.
My spine cracked in three places as I climbed from the back into the front seat to drive. “Maybe Emily’s right,” I muttered as my hands gripped the wheel. “Maybe I am not cut out for car camping.”
I started the car and pulled out of the turnout overlooking the lake.
Within a few minutes, I turned into Pine Ridge Park, where brightly colored tents popped up across the grass. People were walking dogs, the fire department was unloading equipment, and a group of teenagers were arranging orange cones on the street for some kind of fitness event.
I read the names on the tents as I drove by and saw chiropractors, optometrists, a pilates studio, an acupuncture clinic—there were even some hair salons and a local vet. And then I finally spotted a big white canopy with SUMMIT DENTAL printed across the top in navy blue.
I parked along the outer edge of the park, threw my hair into a ponytail, and climbed out of the car. My legs screamed in protest after sleeping in a bunched-up position all night.
I shut the door and started across the grass when someone called my name.
“Hope?”
I turned to see Tyler jogging across the grass toward me, carrying a big box of toothbrush goodie bags.
“You made it,” he said, sounding pleasantly surprised. “I was worried about you last night with you sleeping in your car and all. Did you get any sleep?”
“A little,” I said, giving him a weak smile.
“Well, the offer still stands if you want my room,” he said teasingly with a little nudge. We started across the grass toward our tent.
“Thank you, I really do appreciate the offer. I just really don’t want to impose.”
He nodded as we stepped under the shade of the tent flap. “I get it. Just let me know if you change your mind. Come on, help me set up.”
Everyone else was already there. Erica, Jenn, and Jay were a few feet away at the screening section.
His back was turned to me, and so all I could see were his navy scrubs and dark brown waves.
I quickly averted my gaze and saw Shelby and Devin working on laying out pamphlets for people to take.
Then there was the demonstration table where the Flossy Posse would be working.
Tyler led me over to the brushing demo, where Macey was already arranging giant plastic mouth models.
“There she is!” Macey said. “And only moderately looking like a zombie.”
I attempted a smile. “Thank you… I think.”
Macey handed me an oversized toothbrush. “Come on, you’re on toothpaste removal duty.”
I laughed despite myself as Macey launched into a ridiculous demonstration about brushing in little circles.
It didn’t take long for a group of kids to gather around, giggling as they took turns using the giant toothbrush.
Tyler was adorable with them. One playfully hit him on the head with one of the giant brushes, and he did a very impressive falling-to-his-death demonstration.
“You’ve slayed me with the toothbrush of power.” Tyler grunted and slumped into a faux stillness, pretending they’d gotten the best of him.
I spent most of my time wiping off the models with bright turquoise toothpaste, but I actually found it enjoyable.
Doing something out of my usual routine felt nice.
Getting outside, enjoying the last bits of summer, watching people talk and be friendly to one another.
It was oddly healing. I had been so stuck inside my head lately that getting out and doing something for other people was exactly what I needed.
About an hour later, when the kids had left and our station got a little less busy, Macey nudged me with her elbow. “Look at Jay over there.”
I followed her gaze to see Jay talking to an older woman wearing a knitted sunflower sweater and a hot pink visor. The woman touched his arm as she spoke, and Jay nodded, listening attentively as she pointed toward something on her phone.
Macey sighed dramatically. “I’m pretty sure that’s Denise from his knitting club. Like, could he get any more attractive?”
Tyler rolled his eyes. “Macey, that’s our boss. And since when is knitting attractive?”
“Since forever,” she snapped back. “Maybe take a few notes, Ty. Masculinity can involve doing sensitive things. It’s sweet when a guy volunteers at a dog rescue, or—” she gestured toward Jay and the woman he was still chatting with, “—goes to knitting club. Have you even seen a Nicholas Sparks movie?”
I snorted into my oversized toothbrush, and Tyler looked over at me with an exasperated look.
“Maybe that’s why I’m having such a hard time finding dates. I need to take up crochet.”
“You know what? That’s actually not a bad idea,” Macey said seriously.
The banter between them was fun to watch, and the hours flew by. During all of this, I did my duty of wiping off toothpaste, but I would occasionally let my eyes wander to the screening table where Jay was.