23. Henry
I’m tryingto shake off the feeling of unworthiness that’s stuck to me like tar since last night. I wish I could say that hearing about the kinds of guys Gia usually dates didn’t affect me, but here we are.
Her admitting that maybe she was going after the wrong kinds of guys soothed the ache in my chest enough for me to enjoy the rest of the dinner, but everything coupled with what she said about not dating at all right now was a lot.
I’ve all but accepted that I’m going to continue falling for this girl whether or not we end up dating at all. Somewhere between our walk at the lake and the dinner with Hank and Betty, it became clear. Despite never actively wanting or thinking about dating, I want her. As more than a friend. More than I ever planned.
I guess I never knew it could feel like this with someone. Wanting to be around them more often than not. Thinking of them when I should be focused on something else. Carving out time when there’s barely any to work with.
I guess the only downside is that nothing is going to happen between us.
It is what it is, and I’m just going to enjoy whatever time she spends with me.
That’s why when she offered to take a look at my books, I took her up on it. Well, Betty did the offering, but Gia didn’t seem opposed to the idea.
Walking into Books N’ Brew, I spot my mom handing several Tupperware containers of pastries over to Leah.
“Hey, Mom.” I lean down to give her a hug once her hands are free. Seeing her now, I realize how long it’s been since we’ve talked. Usually, she or my dad call almost weekly for me to come fix something out at the lodge, but I haven’t gotten a call like that in a few weeks.
“Hey, honey, it’s been a while since I’ve seen this face.” Her expression turns accusatory as she briefly palms my cheek.
“Yeah, sorry, things have been busy. You guys haven’t needed anything done lately, it seems, and I’ve been training this new employee, so I’ve had to miss the last couple of family dinners. I promise I’ll be there this week.”
“All right. And did you pick up your glucose monitor refills at the pharmacy? I got a call the other day, and I know how you can be sometimes, forgetting.”
It takes an enormous effort, but I manage to not let out the world’s largest sigh. This isn’t the first time that the pharmacy has called my mom instead of me when my refills are in, despite me being a grown adult. You forget one time when you’re nineteen, and suddenly you don’t know how to take care of yourself.
“I took care of it, although I’d know sooner if they’d stop calling you and just call me.” I refrain from rolling my eyes. I know my mom doesn’t ask for the call. The pharmacist is an old friend of Dad’s, and they’ve always worried about me taking care of myself. It’s all because they love me. But it stings that I can’t be trusted all the same.
“And this training, it’s not too much? Things are going well enough to hire someone?” My mom asks the same question she asked the first time I brought up bringing someone on, and I don’t know what to say, so I shift the conversation.
“Hey, listen, I was thinking we should conference in Art and Natalie this week at dinner. It’s been a while since we video chatted with them, and they’re staying at this really cool place in Greece.”
“You know, that might be a good idea. Maybe after dinner depending on how things go.” She gives me a quick smile and pats me on the shoulder. “I’ve got to run now, but I’d better see you soon all right? Don’t overdo it on the cranberry muffins. I know they’re your favorite.”
Saying a quick goodbye to Leah, my mom hurries out the door, leaving me standing alone at the counter.
I wasn’t even planning to get a muffin or anything; I was going to stick with coffee. But now that I know Mom brought in cranberry muffins…I have to have at least one.
Turning to Leah with a grin, I order. “Hi, Leah, I’d love a small black coffee and one of those cranberry muffins.”
Punching in my order, she gives me the total. “They’re still a little warm, I think.” After she charges my card, she pours my coffee into a small mug and hands me a muffin on a small plate. “Sorry, I didn’t ask if this was supposed to be to go.”
“Nope, I’m sticking around for a bit. I’m meeting someone.”
Just as the words leave my mouth, I hear the door open. Glancing to my left, Gia”s striding in from the cold, already unwrapping her purple scarf from her neck.
“Hi, Henry.” She greets me with a wide smile.
My heart stirs in my chest, and my own smile grows on my face.
“Hey, I was just getting some coffee and snacks. Do you want anything?”
She looks from the plate in my hand to the display case. “That muffin looks amazing. Hi, Leah, could I grab one of those?” She reaches for her wallet, but I stop her.
“Here, take this one. I’ll grab another one and meet you at a table.”
Thanking me quietly, she takes the muffin and goes to find a free table for us to work at.
Leah’s got the muffin plated and waiting for me by the time I manage to tear my eyes from watching Gia walk away.
She slides the plate across the counter with an arched brow and a smirk. “You two would make for a pretty picture.”
“It’s not like that.”
“Isn’t it?” She leaves me with that cryptic comment and turns to wipe down the counter behind her.
Ignoring her, I take my coffee and muffin toward the back where Gia found an open table. Shrugging off my backpack, I slide into the booth next to her and place everything down before grabbing my laptop.
“You just missed my mom. She’s the one who baked these muffins.”
Gia freezes mid bite, eyes going wide. After she swallows hard, she looks at me. “Oh? She did?”
Sensing that maybe that wasn’t the right thing to say, I backpedal. “I didn’t mean that I wanted you to meet her or anything. It was just a coincidence that she was here.”
Only that’s a lie because I’d love it if Gia met my mom. She can be a pain, but I love her, and she’d get along with Gia great. That would make me happier than I have any right to be.
Honestly, Gia would fit in just fine with my family. Friends spend time with their friends” families. That could be a thing. Maybe.
“That’s not—the muffin’s as good as it looks. You should make sure to tell her.”
“I will. Thanks again for meeting with me.” My eyes catch on her lips. They’re curved up into a smile, and there’s a crumb just below her bottom lip.
I reach out lightly with my thumb to brush it away. I let my hand linger, wanting to push my fingers through her hair but not allowing myself to.
Her cheeks turn pink, and her eyes widen. For a moment, there’s something like panic in her eyes, and that’s when I pull my hand back.
“Sorry. Let me pull up my financials.”
She takes my laptop from me and spends the next twenty minutes or so combing through everything while I try to enjoy my coffee and muffin.
Of course, she was right. The muffin is as good as it always is.
“Hey, I was going to ask the front desk, but do you have a laundromat or something in Ever Lake? I’ve somehow made it through every single item that I packed for this trip and desperately need to get some laundry done.” She doesn’t take her eyes off the screen, continuing to scroll as she asks.
“There’s one a couple of towns over, but you can just come use my washer and dryer, if you want. Anytime.”
“Really?” Pulling her eyes from the computer, she looks at me with furrowed eyebrows.
“Yeah, of course. That’s what a friend would do. Right?”
“Yeah…I guess you’re right. That would be really great.”
“Just come by whenever. I’m usually out most afternoons, but feel free to come in the evening too. Whatever works for you. I’ve got a spare key hidden in a little fake rock at the foot of the steps, so if I’m not home, you can still get in.”
“Thank you, seriously. I’m going to have to start sleeping in the nude if I don’t get some laundry done soon.” We both freeze, and her eyes go wide when she realizes what she said. “I’m kidding. It’s not that dire. Anyway, your numbers all look great. You’ve done a really good job at this.
I honor her quick subject change with a laugh. “Thanks, I did all right with math in school.”
“You must’ve been incredible to be this good.”
A slow, warm blush spreads across my cheeks as I glance down to hide a small grin. “Well, I did a bookkeeping and accounting certification at the local community college. I guess that set me up for success.”
I feel Gia’s eyes on me, and I turn to look at her. A small smile lights up her face, and just the sight of it makes my heart expand in my chest. “That’s impressive. That must’ve been hard to juggle while getting your business off the ground.”
“Nah, it wasn’t a big deal.” My instinct to downplay it takes over.
“No, Henry, it is. You wouldn’t believe how many people go to start their own businesses and don’t even think about this aspect. They think accounting is easier than it actually is, and then they have to call people like me to make things right after years of them just jumbling everything up. It really is impressive. I’d honestly say just hire someone when you have the ability and desire to. You’ve got a good grasp on this. Ultimately, it’s just going to be one of those things you take off your plate when you can.”
She so simply pushes back, makes sure that I know that what I did was important. That it’s worth noting and praising. It’s such a small thing for her to tell me that what I did—what I’m doing—is impressive, but it has a large impact. Her words are slowly unraveling some of the stories I tell myself. Maybe I’m not just faking it ‘til I make it. Maybe all my success can’t really just be chalked up to luck.
An alarm on my phone rings, and I take it out of my backpack to check it. It’s a ten-minute warning for my next appointment.
“That sounds great. It’s kind of a time suck, so I’ll start looking into moving that off my plate maybe in the next six months or so if I can. Hey, I really appreciate you taking a look, but I’ve got to run. Someone’s got a busted porch.”
“No problem.”
We pack up and bring our dishes over to the bin that’s set up on the end of the counter up front. Before we head off in different directions, I pull her into a hug.
“Listen, like I said, drop by to do your laundry anytime.”
“Thanks, Henry, I’ll be taking you up on the offer.”
She waves and heads down Main Street in the direction of the bed and breakfast, and I’m left with a heavy feeling of want settling into my bones.
Before I head to my truck, I tell myself to get used to it.