Chapter Twenty-Eight
I quietly opened the door, immediately removing my heels, and crept through the mudroom. The TV was off, and there was no other noise, but the family room lamp was switched on. I couldn’t handle thinking of him being upstairs in his room with someone, so I didn’t. One thing at a time.
I peered around the corner, feeling a little silly that I was sneaking around, but all that changed to relief when I spotted him on the couch. Alone.
I moved in a little closer to see that he’d polished off the six-pack I’d picked up for him earlier. There was a bottle of Jack on the table, but that appeared untouched for the time being.
“Didn’t expect you so soon,” he said with a quick rake up and down my body. “All finished meeting with your friend ?”
All right, what was the deal with all the ‘friend’ crap? The way he emphasized the word made him sound like a two-year-old. And while I wasn’t exactly holding my breath for the Miss Maturity Award, I’d have to say he was the one currently winning the childish contest.
I dropped my purse to the ground and put my hands on my hips. “What were you doing there tonight?”
“Having a drink. What else would you do in a bar? Well, besides sit on some guy’s lap wearing a short, tight dress, of course.”
Even though I was free to be with whomever, and this was really none of his business, I had to put myself in his place and consider how that must’ve looked to him. Me cuddled against a rock god, his hand on my thigh, his mouth on my ear whispering things. If the situations were reversed, I’d probably lose it. Hell, look what I did to Jillian, and Stephen and I weren’t even half as close then. I could be reasonable; I just needed answers first.
“How did you know I’d be there? And don’t tell me it was a lucky coincidence.”
He snickered. “If it was lucky for anyone, it sure as hell wasn’t me.”
Lucky… Lucky’s. It clicked then. “Wait. You read my text!”
“Not intentionally, Perry. It came in while I was standing there. You did leave it screen-up on the kitchen counter.”
Another click. I recalled the text, and to an outsider, it could be mistaken for something much friendlier than what was usually sent by your average friend. It’d explain his change in attitude towards me right before I left. But did he really care that much if I was screwing around with someone?
Then I thought of the message Stefanie asked me to relay and my eyes flashed green. I certainly cared, and I could tell myself I shouldn’t until I was fucking purple and it wouldn’t make a difference. The idea of the man I loved fucking anyone else made me want to throw a chair through the window, then curl up in a ball and cry for days.
“So, I’ve seen this guy around you twice now, Perry. I thought you didn’t date? ”
I ignored him. “Oh, by the way, Stefanie called for you at the house earlier. She’ll be in town the next two days and wants you to meet her at the hotel. Said you’d know which one.”
“Yeah. She reached me at work.”
Well, wasn’t she tenacious? A regular old Little Miss Engine That Could. She must need to get laid really fucking badly for as hard as she was trying to get a hold of him. My skin was going to burst open just recalling the stick-up-her-butt voice. I bet she was one of those who thought she was better than everyone. I hated those people.
“And what business does she have with you?” I had crossed over the ‘trying to hide my jealousy’ point; I was way too jacked up for that. “She didn’t even care if you had a girlfriend.” That was exactly how I took it.
“Did you tell her that you were my girlfriend?”
“No, of course not. Who is she?”
“Someone I hook up with every few months.”
His response was so blasé I wanted to pummel him. How was it okay that he could go off and fuck someone, but I couldn’t sit on someone’s lap? What the hell?
“Every few months? I thought you lose interest after sleeping with them?” How the fuck did she rate?
“And I thought you didn’t date.”
Man, I was seething. “What’s the problem here, Stephen? Weren’t you the one who said I should get right back on the horse?”
I stormed into the kitchen and opened the fridge, pulling out some hard peach cider thing he’d brought home that I hadn’t tried yet. As long as it had alcohol and was sweet, that was all I needed to know. I slammed it shut and almost spun around straight into his chest.
He put two hands on the fridge, blocking me against it. “Is that what this is about? Did you go out tonight to get back at me for Stefanie calling? ”
I glanced between the forearms that were on either side of my head. I was still fuming but it had kicked down a notch, evened out by my breath rate which had hiked up. I didn’t look into his face, staring directly ahead where his tattoo would be visible if his shirt were off.
“What? No. I already had these plans before Miss Every Few Months’ Hookup called.”
“Who’s the guy, Perry?”
“Are you going to fuck her this weekend?”
“No. Who’s the guy?”
“Haven’t I already made that clear? He’s a friend .”
“I can’t recall you ever sitting on my lap like that.”
He moved in a little closer and I swallowed hard. I was still clutching the bottle in my hand, and I wanted to roll it over me to cool down both my heated skin and my temper.
“You….” You’ve never asked . “Who is this woman to you since you’ve seen her more than once?”
I wasn’t making eye contact because I knew that would make me dissolve completely. He’d been closer to me before when we’d hugged, but this was something else entirely. This did not feel innocent.
“And I’ve made myself clear as well. She’s no more than a hookup to me, and I’m the same to her. Do you need to know more?”
The heat radiating off him was making me sweat. Even the cold door against my back wasn’t helping. He had to know what he was doing to me. Was my presence affecting him the same? If so, God, I wanted to feel that. Badly.
“Do you need to know more?” he asked again.
“Yes,” I said softly.
“She lives out of state, and when she comes here for business we meet up if I’m available. It’s as no-strings as you can get, and that’s why I’ve seen her more than once. Now it’s your turn.”
“What? ”
“Your turn to tell me about the man you were on top of tonight. I also need to know more.”
I imagined pulling his shirt up and licking his abs, sliding my hand into his jeans and wrapping it around his cock. I wanted to say screw it and dive right in. I also wanted to run away and pretend this wasn’t happening.
“Perry.”
“His name is Stu, and he really is a friend. My ‘very gay, in a very committed relationship’ friend. We’ve know each other so long, and we get pretty touchy-feely sometimes. He thinks you’re super hot, by the way.”
“Tell him thanks for the compliment.”
“Um, okay.”
He was now so close our clothes were touching. Fucking lucky clothes . A man had never made me feel so unsteady and out of my mind before.
“Just so you know, when I suggested you date, I didn’t mean with anyone else.”
“What?”
“Look at me, Perry.”
Oh shit. I slowly lifted my eyes, and once I caught sight of his, I was done for. Liquefied. He might as well grab that cup over there right now to scoop me up with later.
“You’re aroused,” he said in a low voice.
Did he really need to see my eyes to determine that? But oh God… now I was even more so. “It wouldn’t be the first time with you, Stephen,” I whispered, pushing the words out when it was hard enough to just simply breathe. “That was never the problem.”
“Then what is?” I didn’t answer. His mouth moved closer to mine, and I may have moaned a little. “I want you to date me.”
“Date?”
I was so incredibly dizzy, and I couldn’t think. Just feel, feel, feel. I closed my eyes and all the sensations rushed inward at a faster pace. His lips brushed mine for a brief moment, and I swore I’d just had the most satisfying sex of my life.
“Date. Me.”
“I… I don’t date.”
“No, you’ve never had a date. There’s a difference.”
He took the bottle from my clenched fist, and then his lips were back, harder that time. Longer. His tongue caressed mine, and that time there was no question. I moaned. A lot. I couldn’t contain it. Fuck, he was going to think I was coming from a simple kiss, but there was nothing simple about it. It was shattering me.
He groaned as well, drifting away from my mouth to rest his forehead against mine. “Do you know how hard it was to see you in this dress tonight? To know you were wearing it for someone other than me?”
“I….”
“You’re so damn beautiful, Perry. I want you to be mine and mine alone. I don’t want to share you with anyone.”
His hands were cupping my face, his thumbs stroking my cheeks. Even that was erotic. He kissed down to my lips, moving lower still. My neck was on fire. I was burning everywhere his lips touched. I started to shake.
“I… I’m so turned on.” I had no idea what made those words leave my mouth because my current state couldn’t have been more obvious. I was just blown away by how much I could feel.
“I know you are, and I love it so much. I am too.”
His fingers skimmed over my nipples and I jolted. It was a slight touch through two layers, and I still reacted so strongly. God, how could I resist this man?
“I’ve waited so long, Perry.” I was in a cloud, drifting away. I felt hands through fabric, lips over bare skin. I needed to bring back my judgment, but how? “Say you’re ready for me. Say you want this too. ”
“I….” What was wrong with me? It was such a struggle to get anything out. I’d never had that problem before. He not only owned what I was feeling, but now my words as well. This man .
His kisses were going up my thighs; I hadn’t even realized he’d lowered. I began trembling harder. Now I had the issue of pushing too many breaths out. I couldn’t contain it. I was going pass out.
His palms slid up to my ass and he was picking me up, setting me on something hard. I peered through an eyelid to see the dining room table beneath me. Then my dress was raised and my legs were spread.
“So beautiful, Perry. So fucking beautiful.”
I didn’t understand how he could still speak so effortlessly when I was a pile of mush. I wasn’t even sure if I had a brain at that point. Feel, feel, feel.
He laid me back, and I turned my head so my cheek rested against the cool wood. I was so damn hot. My dress was still on but… holy fuck!
“Ohhhh.” My panties were pushed aside and he was tasting me. His tongue was devouring me like I was his meal for the night. It was too much. I couldn’t handle it. Stephen. Oh my God. What was he doing to me? I’d had this before but never this . “Stephen, Stephen, Stephen! ” His name seemed to have no problem spilling out easily. As easily as the orgasm he took from me.
There was such a burst that for a second I thought my head exploded. I’d forgotten where I was, who I was. My daze cleared slightly but I was still panting. Still on fire. Still the most fucking aroused I’d ever been. Ever .
I opened my eyes enough to see him standing there, looking like he didn’t even belong to this world. He was also breathing hard, matching my chest. I could see his hardness straining to push through. Oh Lord, could I really do this? Throw everything away for one night of sex? Not just sex but ‘drenching, heart-hammering, shatter me into dissolvable pieces’ sex?
“I’m going out of my fucking mind, Perry. I want you so bad. I’ve never wanted anyone this much.” He brought me up to his chest, holding me tight against him. “I’m waiting to hear you say you’re ready. That you’ll give us a chance. That you want more. I fucking need you.”
I could feel his muscles tremble. I knew he wanted me, maybe even more than anyone like he’d said. But for how long?
“I want to take you up to my bed and do it right this time.”
If that was wrong, there was no way I’d survive him doing it right. He chuckled and… wait, had I said that out loud?
“I want to make you feel even better. I want your naked body against mine. I want to both fuck you and make love to you at the same time. Tell me you want all that too.”
Although my body demanded everything he spoke of, my head was starting to clear just enough to vocalize my fears. I needed to get them out before this went any further.
“Our friendship means everything to me. I can’t lose that.”
He squeezed me tighter, bringing my hand to his mouth. “You won’t have to. We can have both. You and I, we can have it all.”
“But what if you don’t feel the same way after we….” I couldn’t even finish the thought, but I had to make a choice. If he lost interest and everything was ruined, I didn’t know if I’d ever recover.
“I told you before, I’ll never let that happen with us. I want you in my life just as much as you want me in yours.” He was kissing up my arm, and I was convinced there wasn’t a spot he could touch that wouldn’t get me racing. I was throbbing all over again. “Say yes, Perry.”
God, I love this man.
“Yes.”
He swooped me up and carried me up the stairs, his mouth never leaving mine. My lips were going to be so swollen, but that was hardly any concern. Everything of mine was swollen, and I couldn’t have been happier.
We passed through the doorway, and as he was setting me down on his bed, I blurted out, “Have you ever brought another woman in here?”
“Never.”
It was unfairly one-sided since I’d had other men in my bed, and I should’ve expected the same from him, but the satisfaction I felt from his answer was immense. I wasn’t going to think about where he did have them, but I never planned to sleep in the spare room again anyway.
He pulled off his shirt, and I drew him closer to me. I’d been so tempted to trace his tattoo with my finger that night, but I’d held myself back. There was no need to hold back any longer.
With a single fingertip, I painted the edges of the lion’s mane and colored in the flower, circling the intricate design and burning it into my memory. It really was very beautiful. I put my lips against it, tasting his skin, feeling his muscles quiver and his chest expand with quicker breaths. When I finished and gazed up at him, his eyes were smoldering.
He laid me down flat on the bed, guiding his hands up my legs, tormenting me with the slow movement. He peeled off my dress inch by inch, kissing along the way until it was lifted over my head. My bra and panties soon followed, and he did nothing but stare at me for what seemed like an eternity. It didn’t matter how old I grew, I knew for a fact that I would never forget the way he looked at me. It was as if he was worshipping me.
“Seeing you like this… it almost feels like it’s not real.”
It was worlds different than what I was used to. The quick, hurried movements, the fumbling, the sensations that could never satisfy me completely, no matter who was issuing them. Stephen had annihilated every other man with one brush of his lips .
“I feel the same,” I said.
My eyes trailed over him as well, needing to see much more of his skin. His body was a work of art, and there was no doubt it was going to blow my mind even more when his pants came off.
“One of your promises for this night was to get naked along with me. To put your body against mine. I want to see you just like you’re seeing me.”
He watched me as he lowered his pants, kicking them off. His boxers were next, and the sight of him made me suck in a breath. Gorgeous.
“Jesus, Perry. You look like you want to eat me alive.”
I smiled, knowing that was exactly how I felt. I’d never wanted a cock down my throat so badly in my life.
I reached for him but he grabbed my hand. “You skipped over my first promise. The one where I make you feel so good. For hours.”
“You never said hours.”
Those were my last words for a while. He slipped two fingers inside me easily and my back arched. When his teeth grazed my nipple and his palm rubbed over my clit, I was done for. I couldn’t do much except squirm and moan. Forget speaking; I was too busy screaming out orgasms.
He wouldn’t let me touch him for longer than seconds at a time, telling me we had plenty more opportunities for that. I was already plotting all the ways I’d drive him insane. Mmm….
After I was thoroughly touched, licked, sucked, worshipped , I lazily opened an eye and noticed him rolling on a condom.
“No,” I said.
His expression indicated that he’d misunderstood me. I held out my arms and pulled him down to me, kissing him with all the passion that he’d given me. I snaked my hand around and removed it from him, finally getting the chance to stroke his cock as I wanted. Pure steel. My body was begging me to take it deep inside .
“Perry….” A deep warning sound left his throat.
“You know I’ve never had sex without one.” I ran the length of him through my wetness and he shivered. I loved seeing him come undone, even if it was just a fraction of what he’d done to me. “Have you?”
“No, I haven’t.” He shifted over, but I wasn’t letting go that easily. “Fuck, Perry. You have to stop right now or I won’t until I’m buried inside you.”
“That’s exactly what I want you to do.” He already knew I was on the pill because he’d seen them on my dresser. “If what we have is different, then I want it to be truly different. I want us to experience something that we’ve never experienced with anyone else.”
His beautiful irises darkened as he grasped both of my hands and pinned them over my head. Then he angled himself between my thighs and locked his eyes on mine. The moment before he entered me, I had only one thought.
I love you .