Chapter 34
Chapter Thirty-Four
Bailey
M y head hurts, my body aches, and my heart lies in shambles after everything that’s just come to light. I've been caught in a perilous storm, my emotions running wild like raging waves in the endless ocean, being pulled in and pushed out to shore by the perilous winds. Each word said was a strike of lightning, illuminating the darkness of every truth spoken, claiming us to its mercy. Now, the ground beneath me has collapsed, leaving me suspended in a void of disarray and pain.
How do I move on from this? Can I piece myself back together when the very fabric of my being feels torn apart?
The weight of everything Nash and I have overcome thus far presses down on me, a heavy burden threatening to crush me under its immense gravity, trying to convince me it was all worth nothing. Yet, somewhere deep within me, a flicker of resilience remains, assuring me that even in the midst of this chaos my family’s caused, there is a path to healing. A path to our happiness.
Yet one question remains. W hat does that look like for the two of us?
After leaving Raven, Poppy and Alexis to gather a few men who work at my family ranch to help them close up for the night, the rest of us drove out to Stingers. Nash refused to let me ride with anyone else, but the entire drive to the bar, I refused to speak to him. Not necessarily because I was angry with him, but I had no clue what to say.
We arrived twenty minutes ago, the last to walk through the doors of the bar. Billie did everyone a favor and lined up shot glasses along the bar, filling each of them with her liquor of choice—luckily not tequila.
It’s been over twenty minutes of silence, but frankly, I don’t think anyone knows what to say. Things like this aren’t supposed to happen. Two families who grew up divided in their own households and amongst one another. Rivals in every aspect, yet here we stand, united despite the hardships thrown our way.
Monroe sits at the table to my right, Monty’s arms wrapped around her as she sips a cup of hot tea Billie made her as soon as we arrived. Nash is leaning against the bar, Theo and Beau, the only two not incredibly shocked by the news, partake in a hushed conversation behind him. Then there’s Jase who stands behind the bar, alone after Camden drove back to Raleigh with Holly, taking Brynn with him. My little sister was too distraught by the news to join us, instead choosing to go home with my brother than spend another minute in my parent’s house. I should have offered her to stay with me at the apartment, but I don’t know where Nash and I stand.
To be honest, I am angry with why he left, choosing to run instead of staying and fighting for what there was between us, but I can’t blame him for it. He was a child, a mere twenty-year-old man who had no prospects or anyone to guide him in the right direction. Monty could have, but he was too consumed by caring for a teenage Monroe to realize the predicament his brother was in.
Though what good would it do us to worry so much about the past, it consumes our entire future?
Jase is the first to break the silence, unable to stay quiet much longer. “Did you do it, Nash?” he asks as Billie hands out the shots. He takes his, willing the courage to keep talking. “Did you fuck my sister again after I asked you not to touch her?”
That was not at all what I was expecting to come out of his mouth. Neither was Nash if the laugh he lets out is any indication. “Are you really asking me that, Jase? Who the fuck are you to talk when you’ve been fucking her all this time?”
I cringe at Nash’s question, yet again saying it like it was a horrible thing. Was I caught off guard by the confession that my best friend had, at some point, slept with my brother and was now having his baby? Yes, but I do not in the slightest fault her for it.
I know we’ll have to one day talk about it and hopefully, in time, she’ll trust me enough to share what really happened, but I won’t be pushing her to do so today. I love Monroe, and having her as part of my family in any way is more than I could ever ask for.
Do I fault my brother? Only because it’s obvious he’s hurt her.
Jase stutters slightly, regretting he didn’t think his question through before speaking. I can tell he’s angry, but I think it’s more with himself for being such a hypocrite. “It’s not like that. This just happened…”
I don’t want this to turn into another shouting match. We’ve all gone through enough to continue this decades long hatred between our families. Especially now that we know we are not the ones to blame.
“We’re not here to argue about that,” I say, stepping toward Nash, who looks like he’s about to jump over the bar to strangle my brother. “That’s something for Monroe and Jase to figure out on their own, without all of you breathing down their neck. This changes nothing.”
Nash laughs, but not because he finds any part of this situation funny. Yet again, I have to remind myself that he’s just as guilty in all of this. “This changes everything. You fucking better do right by her or I swear to God, Jase, I’ll fucking murder you.”
The thought of Nash ever doing anything to purposely hurt someone is unbelievable, but by the look on his face, it’s also not unlikely.
Jase steps forward, though luckily the bar still separates the two best friends. “You’re one to fucking talk. Are you going to do right by Bailey? Are you going to return the money my dad gave you and force her to pretend the last ten years didn’t happen?”
Now it’s my turn to laugh, appalled by my brother’s insinuation that Nash was capable of taking money in exchange for leaving me. “Jase, I love you, but how dare you?”
Instantaneous regret hits my dumbass brother. “I’m sorry, okay, my pops said…”
“Oh, so you believe everything a man who’s lied to us our entire lives says?” Jase drops his gaze, unable to meet mine, embarrassed he’s even suggested that what Nash and I have isn’t real.
I look around the room at the familiar faces that have all felt varying levels of the same pain and grief. Brothers who’ve lost so much time. A girl and her baby, all alone in this world, even if she has her two best friends on her side. And then there’s me, tangled between both sides, fearing betrayal of both, refusing to choose one in fear of what that will do.
Everyone looks defeated, ruined by the truths and pain my family has caused. I can’t help but feel guilty, wanting to erase everyone's unease as best I can.
“We can’t keep doing this. Can’t continue to allow our parents and this stupid rivalry between them to dictate our futures. Look at us. Just a few hours ago, we were behaving like old friends. Lending each other a hand, putting all of this together because we wanted to help one another.” I turn to Monty. “Your sister is my best friend and your brother, the man I’m in love with. My brother is the father of her child and that means he’s now family as well. We can’t keep running away from each other the moment things go awry, especially when they’re out of our control.”
“You,” I say, turning to Jase. “Kept me away from him for ten years because of some stupid idea that two things couldn’t coexist. He couldn’t be your best friend and my boyfriend. I know you are not the only one to blame. He made the choice to stay away on his own, but our fathers were also the culprits in all of this. My dad for threatening him and for blinding you by the hatred he felt for their father.” I turn to Nash, who watches me with an unreadable expression. “And your father, he raised you to believe we were the enemy, allowing you to fear the power my father wields.”
I’m too drawn into Nash’s gaze, his stare pulling me in closer until I’m closing the distance between us. I flatten a palm against his heart, my other hand reaching up, my fingers running through his hair. “I don’t want to give up on this, regardless of the mistakes we made in the past. I don’t want to waste any time yet again separating and letting him win. I forgive whatever reason you had for leaving. I just want you to promise me this time you’ll stay.”
Nash is about to speak, but I quiet him with a soft kiss. I’m not done getting everything off my chest, and I have to do so if anyone in this room is going to have the chance to move forward. “We have to allow Monroe and Jase the opportunity to figure things out on their own. I know you’re angry, but I know my brother. You know him and chose him as a best friend because of the man that he is. He’ll do right by her and the baby. I can promise you that. But it would be hypocritical of us to try to keep them apart.”
The room stands still, no one speaking, though I know they all agree with me. I’ve never heard a silence quite this loud, yet there’s a shared understanding that hangs heavy in the air, needing no verbal confirmation.
“As for Beau…” I say, turning toward the man we’ve just discovered binds the two of us together more than we ever expected, but he silences me with a soft smile. Beau is my father’s son, my brother, yet he’s also Nash’s blood. As fucked up as it sounds, it won’t change anything. There’s nothing that could have surprised me more than that revelation. Though I can’t allow it to dictate how I feel about Nash. We'll somehow work through this, But at the moment, it’s not our priority.
In this moment of stillness, our unity and trust is palpable, a powerful force that binds our families together.
Nash cups my cheek in his palm, his thumb rubbing circles along my tear stained skin. I think he’s about to argue, to tell me he can’t do what I ask, but yet again, the man surprises me, showing me exactly why I love him.
“We’ll figure it out,” he says, placing a soft kiss against my lips. ”Let’s go home, Angel. Everyone go home. We can deal with this tomorrow.”