22. Unofficial Duties
Unofficial Duties
BETTY
“Hello!” I entered the palatial Regents Park estate my cousin Leah shared with her wife Lourdes.
Tonight was the big Royal Albert Hall event, hosted by Leah and Ingrid.
After several weeks apart, I would finally see Mary in her element.
Once more, I worried that the spark would fizzle.
Even though we talked nonstop on the road, it wasn’t the same.
Things hadn’t ended on a particularly stable note.
And with the documentary team following us, I was worried we might never get a moment truly alone.
Two adorable sets of eyes. Leah and Lou’s toddler twins—Victoria and Bobby—faced me. Bobby was shy, but Victoria had no qualms greeting me as the driver deposited my one small suitcase.
“Betty!” Victoria buried her face in my hip.
“Hi, my love,” I dropped to her level. “And hello, Bobby.”
He gave a shy wave as his mother appeared, looking effortlessly chic in a short magenta dress. She always looked perfect in a way I would have hated if I didn’t love her so much.
“Lou will be down shortly,” Leah said. “She’s still getting ready. And I assume you want to get changed.”
“Yeah. I put on makeup on the plane. Does it look okay?”
I stood, letting Leah inspect me.
“Oh, sweetie, go ask Lou. I am hopeless with that, you know? She’s always the one who gives me the once-over.”
It never occurred to me that could be a fringe benefit of marriage to a woman with better beauty skills. I suspected that wasn’t really Mary’s thing.
Leah stepped back. “To me, it’s fine. You’re not going to be on stage. I had to do it up big. But before you scurry, what are you doing here? Are you, Ingrid, and Keir okay? She didn’t mention anything other than you snubbed them.”
I rolled my eyes. “It’s not that. I… I have reasons. Like I said, I wanted to come to see everyone.”
Bobby demanded a pickup. “Mommy, please!”
She gathered him while giving a quick kiss. “You need to go see Granny. Come on. You, too, sweet girl.”
Leah took the twins away as Lourdes appeared atop the stairs, her hair still in rollers.
“Oh, you made it, darling!”
I smiled at her, “Yes!”
“Come, get changed,” she beckoned. “I’m finishing up.”
I lifted my bag and climbed towards the guest room. She observed me as I opened my suitcase.
“You need eyebrows, child,” Lourdes leaned against the door.
“Help me in a sec. I need to change.”
“Fine, fine. What are we wearing?”
I held up a bright pink dress, Lourdes appeared unenthusiastic.
“Okay. Like is it giving vamp or…” She stopped. “No, you cannot go with that color. It’s Leah’s. It will throw the whole look off. She told me to wear blue. Maybe another jewel tone?”
Hand on hip, I asked, “She told you to wear blue?”
“Well, I asked her for her opinion. It’s honestly her dress. Do you have any other contenders?”
“Well, no. Because I’m here for like a day and a half, then on a plane to show a horse. I figured if this didn’t work, I could just… borrow?”
“Fine,” Lou sighed. “Let’s find you something.”
I followed Lou to the room she and Leah shared with massive hers and hers wardrobes.
I remembered being jealous the first time I visited Keir and Ingrid’s place and saw their luxurious closets.
Ingrid even had a place to sit in hers. Leah’s was like a shrine to everything she’d ever done.
Meanwhile, Lou’s was more organized and built around her shoe collection.
Someday, I told myself I would have a fabulous closet.
“What about this?” She handed me a purple dress with a structured corset bodice.
“If I wear that, all you will see is my tits.”
“So?” Lou asked. “I know you aren’t trying to be subtle.”
“What does that—”
Leah appeared, “Okay, your mum has the kids under control. I worry Vicky will try to start a mutiny while we’re out and will never go to sleep, but I must let it go.”
“You have to let her try, love,” Lou said. “Now, try on the dress while we find you some shoes.”
As I shimmied into the hot number Lourdes provided, the two fought about shoes in Leah’s closet. I ignored the conversation at first until it appeared interesting.
“These are fine, Lou! You can play fairy godmother with the dress, while I bring the shoes. Calm down!” Leah said.
“Well, she’s new, darling. I just wanted to… welcome her,” Lou protested.
Striding in, I saw three pairs of shoes.
“I’m new at what?” I asked.
They exchanged glances, then Leah spoke.
“You asked me to get you backstage to meet the band. Then, I hear through the grapevine that you were at The Bookstore after the show with one Marit Jensson. Finally, you were in Trondheim with her—per reports—and left with her from some event. Now, you ring us and ask to stay with us and attend this fundraiser. It’s all a little suss. ”
“All of that from a lot of conjecture?”
“Are you two fooling around or what?” Leah demanded.
“We aren’t,” I said.
Their incredulous expressions matched.
“No… we’re not just fooling around. I… I don’t know what it is. We’re not dating but we’re something. I don’t know how any of this works, so stop! I just don’t know how you got from ‘A’ all the way to ‘Z’ like that.”
“Vibes,” Leah answered. “And there are not that many of us.”
“It’s incestuous,” Lourdes said. “Almost as bad as you lot. Plus, we share an attorney, and Leah is friends with her manager. So, it’s about as obvious as it could be if you all are showing up at the same places and times.”
“I am hosting UniVox—at Uncle Olav’s demand, I’ll have you know!”
“I’m not judging you. I am glad that while I almost went home with Mary once, I didn’t.”
Lou rolled her eyes. “Yes, because you went home with that loser you were dating-not-dating.”
My jaw dropped. “Mary?”
“Your dear cousin had a very, very slutty phase in her late twenties,” Lourdes confirmed. “Delightfully complicated. I am sure there is not a woman in London—nor a man—either in entertainment or the aristocracy she didn’t at least snog.”
“You make me sound like a whore, Lou!”
“You weren’t a saint. I’m mostly jealous because I was boring and married to a total twat.” Lourdes stood and kissed Leah. “You know I love you, but I tell no lies.”
Leah turned to me. “The important bit is that you look hot, okay? You must understand you are jumping headfirst into a shallow pool. Also, we look like the bisexual flag. Was this intentional?”
Lou shrugged. “No, darling. It just worked out.”
“I… I have no idea what I am doing. No one knows but Hank and Cici and… I feel like an idiot.”
Lou put her hands on my shoulders and looked down from her sky-high heels.
“I wasn’t out-out until Leah, and I announced it on a red carpet.
I was terrified I’d lose all my work and that the world would fall apart.
I thought I wasn’t queer enough to fit in so many times.
I think everyone does. I didn’t officially come out until I was forty. ”
It never occurred to me that a woman I saw as a queer role model and who was so self-assured in her relationship with Leah could ever feel less-than. I wasn’t even thirty, so if it was good enough for Lou, why wasn’t it good enough for me?
Leah sighed, “Nope. Not me. I didn’t doubt it.”
“Gay dads,” Lou reminded. “When did you go to your first pride parade?”
“While I was still in a baby carrier, no doubt.”
“Lucky bitch who never had her parents ask which one was the boy.”
I snickered. “God, please tell me that is not a thing!”
“It is,” Lou said. “I am sure you will not get it from your mother—the one who was raised by lesbians—or your father who barely talks.”
I snickered.
Lourdes hugged me tight. “You know you are like a baby sister to us. There aren’t any stupid questions.”
“Nope. Only ones you might not want honest answers to,” Leah said. “But you look hot. At the very least, Mary will not be able to ignore you.”
“I don’t think that has ever been our problem,” I sighed wistfully.