CHAPTER 15
“Hey, do you have to run out somewhere? Want to have breakfast with me?” she asked on her way to Harlow’s room, only to find the door open, but the room was empty.
Thinking Harlow was in the bathroom, she went back into the kitchen to start on some coffee for them, expecting her to emerge sooner rather than later.
The shower wasn’t on, though, she realized.
Larissa knew that because the plumbing in the house wasn’t exactly quiet.
In fact, her dad had offered to come over and take a look on more than one occasion, but she’d turned him down every time, thinking her parents had already done too much for her.
She waited ten more minutes before deciding to check Harlow’s room again, thinking that maybe she’d been so absorbed in the journal she was reading and hadn’t noticed her going back to her bedroom, but Harlow wasn’t there.
Larissa then walked by the guest bathroom and took a chance, pushing the door open. No Harlow.
“Oh,” she said to herself and leaned against the doorframe. “She didn’t come home last night. Right. Of course.”
That really only meant one thing: Harlow had gone home with someone.
That was probably why she hadn’t wanted Larissa to go to the work party with her.
She had had someone there she was interested in and hadn’t wanted Larissa tagging along, or she had wanted to go out after the work event and hadn’t wanted it to look like they were there together.
Larissa walked back to the kitchen table and found her coffee already cold. It didn’t matter. She needed to get going anyway. She had work in an hour and had to get dressed.
Working at a local bookstore part-time wasn’t glamorous, and it didn’t pay well, but it did pay, and it made her feel like she wasn’t entirely depending on her parents to pay for everything.
With this job and the little money she made from teaching when she did teach, she had enough to pay for her bills and a little more than that, but that was it.
She hadn’t put anything away into savings, and she knew that would become more and more of a problem the older she got.
Never wanting or expecting to be a millionaire, she wasn’t worried about how little she would make as a professor once she got a professorship somewhere, but it had crossed her mind that she wouldn’t teach forever and would need something coming in when she retired.
The idea for the book hadn’t stemmed from that exactly, but having some kind of income that would be in addition to her teaching would help her build the kind of future she wanted for herself.
Her house was free because of her parents, but it wasn’t where she wanted to live forever, so her plan was to take good enough care of it for her dad so that when she found a home with someone she would, hopefully, meet and marry one day, he could flip this one and make a belated profit on it, and she’d have the house she wanted with the woman she’d spend her life with.
“I’m looking for a book,” a woman said to her later, when Larissa was at work.
“Okay. I can help you,” she replied and shelved the one she had in her hand. “What is it you’re looking for?”
“Um… He’s Just Not That Into You,” the woman answered, looking sheepish.
“Do you have it? It’s not for me. It’s a gift, which is why I’m here.
I read books on my phone, but my mom is obsessed with this new guy who ghosts her all the time, and she only reads actual books. I thought I’d give her a hint.”
“I think we have a copy. If it’s not on the shelf, I can check the computer.” Larissa walked over to the aisle and scanned the shelf. “Here you go.”
“Thanks,” the woman said and took it from her when Larissa handed her the copy. “This will help her, right? I’ve only seen the movie, and it wasn’t very good, but the books are supposed to be better than the movies, so…”
“I can’t say I’ve read that one, or watched the movie, but there’s a small self-help section you could peruse and see if there’s something she might be interested in from there.”
The woman laughed and said, “All of them. She’d need all of them. But I’ll start with this one. Can I pay for this?”
“Sure.”
They walked over to the counter, where Larissa rang up the book and said goodbye to the first customer they’d had in since she’d arrived four hours ago.
“Slow day,” Janine, the manager, said when she walked out of the back.
“Yeah,” Larissa agreed with a nod. “But we got a sale.”
“Hey, you can go home early, if you want. I think I can handle the one or two customers we’ll get before we close.”
“Are you sure? I can keep restocking. We got in the new mystery everyone’s going to want. It’s out tomorrow. I can get it on the cart, ready to put on the shelves for you.”
“I’ve got it. I finished doing payroll and what I had to do back there, so you’re good.”
“Okay. If you’re sure, that would be great,” Larissa said. “I need to work on my dissertation and could use some library time. My friend’s been staying with me for a few weeks now, and she’s great, but she can be a distraction at times.” She laughed a little. “I’ll go clock out now.”
“Why is she staying with you?”
“Breakup. She’s looking at apartments, but I’m usually the stopover before she finds one after she ends a relationship where she moved in with her girlfriend.”
“This has happened before?” Janine asked.
“A few times, yeah.”
“Has she tried not moving in with them?”
Larissa laughed and said, “You’re not the first person to mention that as a concept.”
“Hey, what are you doing later?” Janine asked, leaning over the counter. “I’ll close up at eight. Want to grab a drink or something?”
“A drink?”
“Yeah. I’d ask the others who work here, but you’re the only one, I think, who can legally drink.
Plus, you’re the only one I can carry on an actual conversation with.
The others just stare at their phones when they work the counter and try to put them in their pockets when I’m nearby so that I won’t see, but they forget about the security cameras right above their heads.
” Janine pointed to one of the cameras aimed at the register.
“I’ll buy, if you want. A margarita or something?
The place down the street from here has karaoke, which is usually more fun to laugh at than to do yourself. ”
“Oh, I would, but I can’t.”
“Busy? No problem. Another time,” Janine replied and stood up.
“I’m just restless. I feel like any day now, the owner is going to either fire me or have me fire the people on their phones because we’re not making enough money.
I should be looking for another job already, probably, but I’m trying to manifest me keeping this one.
If I start looking, I feel like that means I’ve given up and I’ll be laid off the next day. ”
“You really think that?”
“You’d be the last to go, so don’t worry. You’re the best employee in this place. You’d be the manager if you actually wanted to work full-time, so thanks for not doing that.”
Larissa laughed a little and replied, “No problem. I don’t want to manage. I’m only here for the money while I’m finishing up my program.”
“I know. I remember.” Janine smiled softly at her. “Psychology. Something with cortisol.”
“You remember that?”
“How many lunches have we had with no customers in here, and you talked about your program and your dissertation? Of course, I remember.”
“I talk about it that much?”
“Enough,” Janine replied with a wink. “You really can’t grab a drink tonight?
Or do you just not want to? Either is okay.
I guess I’m getting braver after a year of working here and wanting to ask you out but being worried because I’m technically your boss.
I probably won’t be for much longer: the owner is coming back to town soon.
I’m putting myself out there prematurely, but I might only have a couple more chances. ”
“Asking me out? Like on a date?”
“Yeah, on a date,” Janine said and smiled at her again. “You know I like you, right?”
“No.”
“You didn’t? Really?”
“No,” she repeated.
“Well, I do. I have for a while now, but the stupid nametag they make me wear says ‘manager’ on it, so I didn’t want to make it seem like you had to go out with me to keep your job or something. That’s not the case at all. You can totally say no, and it’ll be all good.”
“I’ve got a lot going on right now. I–”
“Ouch.” Janine laughed and took a step back away from the counter. “The too-busy-for-a-relationship excuse? Really, Larissa?”
“It’s true. I’m only part-time here because I’m in school.”
“And school takes up all your time? You can just say no. For real. No excuses required.”
“I… I don’t get out much. Harlow is always telling me that.”
“That’s the friend staying with you, right? You’ve mentioned her before. A lot, actually.” Janine smirked.
“Yeah, we’ve been best friends forever. She’s always trying to get me out of the house, and I don’t really go even when she asks, so I think it would be unfair to go out with you.”
“If she’s a friend, I think she’d understand you going on a date. I mean, sex is a possibility when you’re dating someone, not with a friend. Well, I guess you could have a friends-with-benefits thing, but–”
“We don’t,” she interjected quickly. “We’re just friends. No benefits.”
“And you really think she’d be upset that you had the possibility of a fun date, maybe another one or two, and sex at some point? I don’t mean with me; just in general.”
“We don’t really talk about that. I guess once or twice, but not really.”
“You don’t talk about dating or sex with Harlow?”
“Not really. Sex came up once recently, but other than that, I can’t think of a time we’ve talked about that.”
Janine nodded and said, “Okay. Got it.”
“Got what?”
“Nothing. I’ll take it from here if you want to go home and hang out with Harlow.”
“Are we really okay? I don’t want you to–”
“We’re all good.” Janine held up her hands in supplication.
“I promise. If you change your mind, let me know, but otherwise, I’ll drop it.
You won’t get me in trouble for sexual harassment or anything, right?
I made sure I was on the other side of this counter when I asked, and I try to keep my distance when we’re in the storage room. ”
“Keep your distance? Why?”
“Because you’re beautiful, and you have no idea. Can you blame me for wanting to be close?”
Larissa didn’t know what to say to that, so she didn’t say anything.
“Well, I think I’m definitely bordering on that sexual harassment thing now, so I’m going to let you go clock out and station myself behind the counter until you leave,” Janine added.
“It’s okay. Really,” Larissa replied. “I’m not uncomfortable or worried about you. I’m not going to get you in trouble.”
“It’s fine. I just need to be real: the owner will be back in town after an extended vacation.
That can only mean she’s going to be here more herself, so she won’t need me to manage things much longer.
I need to start looking for another job, and, hopefully, it won’t be awkward for you for too much longer. ”
“It’s not awkward, I promise. Maybe we can be friends? Work or no work.”
“Possibly. Have a good night, Larissa,” Janine said with a smile.
“You too,” Larissa replied and headed toward the back, where she clocked out and grabbed her stuff, including her bag, which she never left in her car when she went inside anywhere.
Harlow had told her to put it in the trunk when they’d gone grocery shopping once, and Larissa had explained that her laptop was in there.
“You back everything up on the cloud and report it to the cops as stolen,” Harlow had argued.
“And what would I type on in the meantime? Besides, the cops won’t buy me a new computer,” she’d argued back.
“You’d just use mine. And if you needed help, I’d help you with the money part.”
“So, I should leave my bag with my computer in it in my car instead of carrying it with me because I back things up on the cloud, could file a police report, and could borrow your computer? Makes a lot of sense, Harlow.”
Harlow had just laughed in response and had taken Larissa’s bag off her shoulder to carry it herself.
Larissa didn’t know what had made her think of Harlow as she walked to her car in the parking lot, but she was still thinking about her as she sat at the table in the library, trying to focus on what she was reading.
She didn’t want Harlow to move an hour away, and not because Harlow carried her bag sometimes.
She liked having her around. Yes, Harlow was a distraction sometimes, but she also helped Larissa stay on task, was fun to watch movies with, made the best popcorn, and didn’t use all the hot water when she showered.
Larissa knew what she wanted to do then, and it made sense in so many ways.
Harlow could just move in permanently, or at least until she moved in with someone else one day.
She could pay Larissa a small amount in rent, but nothing close to what she’d pay that apartment complex, and that would give Larissa a little extra money should the bookstore lay people off, and she and Harlow would still have time together.
They lived together so well, in her opinion, that she thought Harlow might not even care about the longer drive to work, especially with how much money she’d be saving in rent.
She smiled as she closed her computer, having a plan to ask Harlow that night, and she packed up her things because she was getting nothing done at the library anyway.
Then, she remembered that Harlow hadn’t come home last night, and her mood went from excited and happy to sad and confused instantly.
Harlow hadn’t texted her or otherwise let her know that she wasn’t going to be there, and that really could only mean that she’d gone home with a woman.
Larissa wasn’t ready to process what that meant for her right now, so she stood, left the study room she had been able to snag, and exited the library.
When she got into her car, she decided to text Harlow to see if she’d reply.
Larissa: Hey, leaving the library. Want me to pick up something for dinner?
She started the car, not expecting a fast response, but her phone dinged seconds later, so she took a look.
Harlow: Sure. I’m not there yet, but I should be in about an hour. Can it be pizza or something I can reheat?
‘She’s still not at the house,’ Larissa thought to herself, and typed that she’d get their usual pizza order.
Then, she drove home, wondering where Harlow had been all night and now, all day, too.