Chapter 44
Chapter Forty-Four
Derek
I stand in front of the mirror, fiddling with my tie for what feels like the hundredth time. The suit is a new one—classic black, with a white dress shirt that Casey said would “bring out my eyes” if I wore it right. I’m not sure it’s doing much, though, because all I can see in the mirror is how stiff I look, like a nervous groom or something.
Why am I acting like a seventh grader going to his first dance with his longtime crush?
Because I know Amber is going to be there looking amazing.
I pull the tie one more time, finally managing a decent knot, and check my reflection. “Just talk to her, Derek,” I mutter as if that’ll somehow make this easier.
I want to see her. I need to see her, to say everything I should have said that night. And maybe—if I get lucky—she’ll let me apologize and make up for every stupid thing I said that pushed her away.
I take a breath, trying to steady myself. If I’m going to make this right, today has to be the day.
Casey’s voice echoes outside my room, calling out, “Come on, Dad! We don’t want to be late!”
With one last tug on my jacket, I head out, determined to keep it together and make it to the wedding without losing my nerve.
I scan the crowd, catching sight of Bree laughing with her bridesmaids and Charlie’s parents talking with some family friends, but I don’t see Amber. The anticipation makes my heart race. Part of me hopes I’ll find her right away, and the other half is terrified I will.
Teddy calls out my name, and I give him a half wave as I start toward him and Sofia. Out of the corner of my eye, I see Amber walking toward the gazebo, wearing a sage-green dress that hugs her in all the right places, her hair falling in soft waves over her shoulders, wineglass in hand. She’s looking down at her phone, completely focused on whatever she’s reading. She’s so focused, in fact, that she doesn’t see the small dip in the grass ahead of her.
I watch it all happen in slow motion—her ankle turning slightly, the stumble, her hand instinctively reaching out. Without thinking, I step forward, reaching her just in time to catch her by the arm, but instead, she practically slams into me, and wine goes all over us.
“Oh!” She gasps, looking up at me with wide eyes. “Derek.”
“Hey,” I breathe, my voice soft, my hand lingering on her arm for a beat longer than necessary. “Are you okay?”
She nods, her cheeks flushing slightly as she regains her balance. “Yeah, just…graceful as always.”
“I’m glad I was here to catch you.”
“Shoot, I spilled wine all over both of us again.” She giggles as she shakes her head.
“It’s just like when we first met.”
We stand there for a moment, our eyes meeting, and I can feel the words I’ve been rehearsing in my head all morning bubbling up to the surface. I know I can’t waste this chance. I’ve missed her so much it’s like there’s an empty ache where she used to be, and if I don’t tell her how sorry I am now, I might never get the chance.
“Amber, can we—can we talk for a minute?”
She looks hesitant, glancing toward the guests milling around, but she shakes her head. “I don’t think that’s a good idea. Especially not now, I think…I think we said all we needed to.”
“Amber,” I say, reaching for her.
She shakes her head and then scurries off.
Shit, that didn’t go as planned.
I feel the sadness creeping in, but I know I won’t let this end without apologizing and saying what I need to.
The wedding ceremony starts, and I stand near the back, watching Bree and Charlie exchange vows. It’s a beautiful day—blue skies, soft breeze, everything perfect for their big moment. But no matter how hard I try, my eyes keep drifting to Amber.
“Miss Shafer looks like a princess,” Casey whispers, tugging at my sleeve. I glance down at her, her eyes wide with admiration as she stares at Amber.
“She does, doesn’t she?” I murmur, my chest tightening. Casey grins before turning her attention back to the ceremony.
I try to focus on Bree and Charlie, but it’s impossible. Amber’s laughter carries on the breeze as she leans over to whisper something to Sofia, and it’s like a magnet pulling me in.
When the ceremony ends and everyone starts mingling, I seize the opportunity. Amber’s standing near the edge of the crowd, holding a glass of champagne and talking to Bree. I approach cautiously, my heart pounding.
“Amber,” I say softly, and she turns to face me. Her smile falters for a moment before she schools her expression into something neutral.
Her eyes soften for a moment, but then she shakes her head. “Derek, again, this isn’t the time or place.”
“Amber—”
“Please.” She interrupts, her voice firm. “Not now.”
I nod, swallowing the lump in my throat as she turns and walks away. My chest feels heavy, but I remind myself that this isn’t over. Not yet.
The reception is lively, with music, laughter, and the clinking of glasses filling the air. I stick close to Casey and Eric, trying to keep my mind off Amber, but it’s a losing battle. Every time I catch a glimpse of her, my heart aches.
As the toasts begin, I find myself standing near the edge of the room, nursing a glass of whiskey. Bree and Charlie are glowing as their friends and family take turns sharing stories and well-wishes. The atmosphere is warm and joyful, and I can’t help but think about how much I want to share something like this with Amber.
When there’s a lull in the speeches, I feel a surge of determination. This is my moment. I set my glass down and step forward, clearing my throat. I lean down to talk to Bree and Charlie.
“I need to apologize to Amber, but she’s stubborn and not letting me get a word in. Would you…would you have a problem if I made a speech on the microphone?”
“Hell no, we wouldn’t.” Charlie laughs.
“I couldn’t think of a better thing to happen. My best friend getting the man she loves back, muah, chef’s kiss,” Bree grins as she claps softly.
“Thank you both,” I say before I walk over and grab the microphone from the DJ. I blow out a long breath. I hate public speaking of any kind so I’m feeling like I might vomit or pass out before I actually go through with this.
“Excuse me,” I say into the microphone, my voice carrying over the crowd. All eyes turn to me, and I catch Amber’s startled gaze from across the room. “I don’t want to steal the spotlight, but I need to say something.”
Bree raises an eyebrow, a knowing smile tugging at her lips, and Charlie gives me an encouraging nod. I take a deep breath, my heart pounding in my chest.
“First of all, Bree and Charlie, congratulations. You two are perfect for each other, and it’s an honor to be here celebrating with you today.”
There’s a round of applause, and I take the opportunity to glance at Amber again. She’s watching me intently, her cheeks flushed.
“But there’s something else I need to say,” I continue, my voice steady despite the nerves coursing through me. “Amber Shafer, you’ve been on my mind since the day we met. You’ve challenged me, inspired me, and made me a better man. And I can’t keep it to myself anymore—I’m in love with you. And I want the whole world to know it.”
The room erupts into cheers and applause. Bree and Sofia are making catcalls, and Teddy shouts, “It’s about time!” I see Amber covering her face with her hands, clearly mortified, but there’s a smile peeking through her fingers.
As the noise dies down, she stands and marches over to me, grabbing my arm and pulling me off to the side. The crowd erupts into laughter and whistles as she drags me into a quiet corner.
“Derek!” she hisses, her cheeks blazing. “What the hell was that?”
“I meant every word,” I say, meeting her gaze. “I love you, Amber. And I’m done hiding it.”
Her eyes search mine, and for a moment, I think she’s going to yell at me. But then she lets out a shaky laugh, her shoulders relaxing.
“We can talk now, I guess,” she murmurs.
Yes!
My heart flutters as excitement and nervousness fill me.
I guide her a few steps away from the crowd, finding a quiet corner near the blooming roses, away from prying eyes and wedding chatter. I take a deep breath, trying to steady myself. This is it.
“Amber, I know I’ve said this a hundred different ways in my head, but none of them feel enough. I’m…I’m so sorry for everything I said to you and for how I acted. I was an idiot, plain and simple.”
She opens her mouth to speak, but I shake my head gently, needing to get it all out before I lose the nerve. “I let my own hurt and anger cloud everything. I took it out on you, and you didn’t deserve a single bit of it. You’re… you’re everything good in my life. Losing you—realizing I pushed you away—was one of the worst feelings I’ve ever had.”
I swallow, forcing myself to continue. “I miss you, Amber. More than I can even explain. I miss everything about you—your smile, your laugh, the way you bring light into every room you walk into. And I love you. I think I’ve loved you from the very beginning, even if I was too blind to realize it.”
Her breath catches, her eyes glistening slightly as she looks at me. “Derek…”
“I don’t expect you to just forgive me, and if you need space, I understand. I’m willing to do whatever it takes, no matter how long it takes, to make things right.”
She looks away for a moment, blinking rapidly, and I feel my heart thudding in my chest as I wait.
But then she looks back up at me, and there’s a softness in her gaze, a kind of forgiveness that I didn’t expect to see. “Derek, you hurt me. But I know you were hurting too. And I’ve missed you too. Every day.”
Her words hit me like a tidal wave, a rush of relief and hope crashing over me. She reaches out, taking my hand, and I can feel my heart pounding as she steps closer, her eyes never leaving mine.
“I love you too,” she whispers, her voice soft but sure, like she’s finally saying something that’s been building up inside her for just as long as it has in me.
And that’s all I need to hear.
I close the gap between us, pulling her into my arms, holding her close as if I might never let go. She wraps her arms around my neck, and at that moment, everything else falls away. I tilt my head down, our faces so close that I can feel her breath against my lips, and then, finally, I kiss her.
It’s soft and slow at first, like we’re rediscovering each other, pouring every ounce of apology and promise into that one kiss. She kisses me back, her hands running through my hair, pulling me closer, and it feels like every bit of distance and hurt between us melts away, replaced by the warmth of forgiveness and something deeper, something that’s been waiting to surface for far too long.
When we finally pull back, she’s smiling, her eyes bright, and I feel like I’m seeing the real Amber, the one I fell in love with, the one I almost lost.
“Think we can start over?” I ask, brushing a strand of hair behind her ear, my thumb tracing the line of her cheek.
She laughs softly, nodding. “Yeah. I’d like that.”
We stand there for a moment, just holding each other, the world around us a blur. The music from the wedding ceremony filters through the garden, and I realize that people will probably start looking for us soon. But right now, none of that matters.
Right now, I’ve got her in my arms, and that’s all I need.
She glances back toward the gathering, then looks up at me with a grin. “We should probably head back.”
“Yeah,” I say, reluctantly letting her go but keeping her hand in mine. “Wouldn’t want to miss the reception.”
As we walk back toward the crowd, hand in hand, I feel a weight lift off my shoulders, replaced by something warm and steady. I know there’s still work to do, and I’ll have to prove to Amber that I won’t take her for granted again.
When we reach the main reception area, Teddy catches sight of us and grins, giving me a sly thumbs-up that makes me chuckle. Amber catches it too and rolls her eyes, but she’s smiling, her cheeks a little flushed. Linda and Bill stand nearby, giving us both a mock golf clap with giant grins on their faces.
“Looks like they’ve been waiting for this too,” I murmur, squeezing her hand.
She laughs, nudging me lightly. “We’re pretty lucky they’re all rooting for us, huh?”
“Yeah,” I say, my voice soft. “I think we are.”
The music begins, and as we watch Bree and Charlie share the first dance, I can’t take my eyes off Amber.
I’m going to do everything I can to make her mine forever.