Chapter 15
Nicolas knew better than to poke Emily, the tigress, but he couldn’t help it. Her telling him to form his own opinion of her had irked him. It was like she was treating him like everybody else. He couldn’t understand why that had stung. He’d given up on trying anyway.
Now two months into their arrangement, he’d noticed a change. Like the way sunlight got brighter as winter faded into spring. Something that made him warm…comfortable.
He loathed it.
He despised the way she made his walls fall. The way his tongue acted before his head. Just like it had done a few minutes ago.
Nicolas ran a hand over his face. Why had he told her about his family? His past?
David had informed him of the background check she’d done. An attempt to uncover his secrets.
And he’d let her.
He’d let her see the sides of him no one else could.
Except for one side.
She probably just wanted to know if he was a hidden serial killer or something, but that could be arranged because Nicolas truly wanted to bury this side of himself.
He’d seen that look on her face when talking about her past. It was haunting. And he’d been no help at pointing out the shit she had to put up with.
Is seeing her true self worth causing her pain?
He groaned and dropped into his chair.
She’d compelled him. That was the only explanation. She’d cast the same spell on him that she had on the entire nation almost two decades ago when she’d started acting. Now, all he longed for was a disenchantment.
Do you really?
His phone rang on the desk, saving him from that pathetic thought.
It was his mother.
He picked up. “Pronto, mamma.”
“Vedo che ti ricordi ancora di avere una madre.” I see you still remember you’ve got a mother.
His mouth twitched with a smile. “Sei stata bene?” Have you been well?
“It’d be a lie if I said I was,” she griped. “You haven’t called me in a month but spoke to your father earlier this week. Why? Is it because I can’t talk business I’m of no use to you?”
Was it fair for her to be so endearing at this age?
“I haven’t called because I was settling things with the board members here. After that I got busy with the European branch. They had a couple setbacks. I was informed that father had gotten involved again and made sure to step in.”
“Involved? Didn’t the doctors tell him to take it easy?”
Nicolas braced himself for the incoming rant.
“Quel vecchio testardo.” That stubborn old man. “What’s the point of retiring if he’s still going to stick his nose where it doesn’t belong? Does he have to die to realize how serious a recurrence could be?”
“It was my fault. I shouldn’t have been so distracted.”
“Yes, what—or who—has caused you to be this distracted, Nicolas?” she asked, as if the answer was already in the palm of her hand.
He froze. “Did—did John tell you something?”
“Tell me what?” she asked innocently.
“You know that’s a breach of confidentiality.” He sighed, realizing that she knew before he had a chance to inform her. “My lawyer shouldn’t be telling you all about my endeavors.”
“John has worked for us since before you were born. Where do you think his loyalty lies?” she asked confidently. “Plus he was technically acting as counsel in that moment so he’s not necessarily bound by confidentiality.”
“That still doesn’t justify him telling you about my personal affairs.”
“Oh, you mean your marriage to that actress? If I didn’t know any better, I’d think you planned this since you got infatuated with her at twenty-one. It’s not every day someone marries their crush. Emily Pinault, is it?”
“It’s merely a coincidence.” He tried to stay composed. “And she’s no longer my crush.”
“Coincidences rarely happen when it comes to you.”
It didn’t matter what he said…she wouldn’t believe him. Hell, he wouldn’t either if he were in her shoes. The whole thing felt absurd, like it would take the universe bending in his favor for their stars to align.
Somehow, impossibly, it had.
Delusion crept in, tempting him with dangerous thoughts. Ones that stated maybe this was fate.
“I know I should be grateful you found someone willing to agree to that crazy stipulation of marriage meaning stability,” she said, “but I can’t help wondering…what does she get out of this? Her family’s just as well off, and she doesn’t seem short of suitors.”
The thought of Emily with other men made him shift in his chair. It brought back a restless feeling he thought he’d long tamed.
“She was in a bit of a bind herself,” he shared quickly. “How’s Anna doing?”
His mother fell for the change of topic.
“I heard you bought her tickets? You need to stop feeding her obsession! I’ve heard more about this Alfie boy than I ever cared to.
She’s starting to sound like you with your jazz fixation.
I only made peace with your taste when Pavarotti got thrown into the mix. ”
“It’s a harmless pastime, just like your opera singers. She’s someone who needs inspiration constantly. Consider it part of her studies.”
“You always cover for her. You’ve spoiled her rotten! Don’t be surprised if she turns around and bites your hand that feeds her.”
She could be so dramatic sometimes.
“When will you visit Milan again?”
His fingers running across the edge of his desk paused.
“Anna’s the one who asked, not me.”
He couldn’t fight the smile anymore. “I have some time next week. I’ll come then. I’ve been meaning to let you know.”
“Make sure to bring Emily along.” Her voice was hesitant, but he knew she didn’t have it in her to be opposed to Emily.
His mother had witnessed it firsthand, how Emily had been his refuge as a new adult. The only thing that kept him sane during those relentless meetings, endless introductions, and teachings under his father’s watch.
The only time he had to himself was spent watching films. Her films.
It was the single instance, his mother had pointed out while arguing with his father, in which he’d apparently not looked like a goddamn zombie.
The reminder gave him a whiplash.
Suddenly, the urge to apologize to her overwhelmed him. What he’d done now felt like he’d shot himself in the foot and he didn’t want to delay saying he was wrong this time. Things like this had a habit of piling up and turning out for the worse.
“Ma, I think I’m going to have to call you back.”
He hung up and rushed out of his study.
A hurricane of emotions spun through Nicolas, barely allowing him to steady himself outside Emily’s bedroom door. Just as his hand lifted to knock, it swung open.
“What do you want?”
“To apologize.”
Her eyes flew wide as her fists slowly loosened, fingers uncurling one by one.
He went on, high off the memories of the past. “You were right,” he said.
“I don’t know what it’s like to perform for love.
Never had to. But I know what it’s like to do it for respect, so yes, I am guarded because of my responsibilities.
It’s a shit excuse, but I’m still adjusting to someone else knowing all of this. ”
He exhaled, the weight of it pressing against his ribs.
“It’s the same case for you, right? Suddenly having someone know all about you, see through you?
But trust me when I say this, Emily, I wasn’t trying to treat you like everyone else.
I’m sorry if it felt like that or if I hurt your feelings. You didn’t deserve it.”
Not after all the times she’d kept him from spiraling. She’d been the constant when everything else felt chaotic. His younger self—naive, hopeful, and hopelessly enamored—owed her that grace. Even if this version of him wasn’t sure how to give it.
She twiddled her fingers. Her eighteen-year-old self startled him for a split second. “Thank you...for apologizing.” Her eyes lifted to meet his, voice soft. “I’m sorry too. For what I said.”
His chest tightened, a slow burn curling within it. Was it heartburn? God, he hoped so. Because if it wasn’t, it’d be something far more dangerous. Something he wouldn’t know how to deal with right now.
“It’s alright.”
He could forgive her. For the sake of his business. For the sake of his duties. But did standing here, breathless before her, fall into any of those categories?
“My parents want to meet you.”
“Really?” She blurted. “Why?”
His lips twitched. “Considering you’re their daughter-in-law it shouldn’t come as much as a surprise.”
“Yes...but by contractual obligations. They know this, right?”
He ignored the way his heart clenched at the reminder. “My mother does, so I assume my father does as well.”
A deep sigh finally left her. “If you require the formalities of it, fine. I did agree that I’d do anything to help out regarding that,” she relented. “When will we be going?”
“How does next week sound?”