6. Amias
SIX
AMIAS
"I'm sorry about the scene the other day," I said to Naya. I knew she usually came at least fifteen minutes early into a conference room when she was running a meeting so she could set everything up. I'd been keeping an eye out for her so I could get her alone.
Naya stared at me like I'd just dropped down from outer space and had a horn sprouting out of my head. "What scene?"
I stared at her not sure if she was fucking with me or…. "When Ann and I saw you at Legal Sea Foods with your…ah…boyfriend."
She shrugged nonchalantly and requested softly, "Please let's not bring up personal stuff at work."
"I was just apologizing, Naya, no need to be difficult about it," I snapped. Fucking hell! Why the fuck did I say that? That did not sound like I was sorry, even a little.
"Okay," she said on a short smile, absolutely no irritation or malice in her voice. "Can I help you with something?"
I shook my head. "No."
"I'll just set up for the milestone meeting. See you in ten minutes?"
She spoke like I'd not just apologized and fucked that up by snapping at her. She showed no emotion. She seemed unfazed and very much ready to do her job.
Today, she was wearing what she always did, black pants with a black sweater. This one had a high neck and was loose. But now I knew the body beneath her loose clothes.
I walked out of the conference room and watched her through the glass walls.
She hooked up her laptop to the screen and started to go through the slides.
Her hair was tied in a low ponytail. Wisps of dark hair surrounded her face. Her eyes, like Nolan's, were gray, but hers were lighter. Her skin was darker than Nolan's, inherited from her mother who was half Sudanese and half Scandinavian.
Naya had long lashes. Her clothes were not chic. She tended to be mousy. And yet, there was a subtle elegance about her. She wasn't aggressive, but she was…strong.
She walked up to the screen and stood in front of it, checking something and then used the presentation clicker to move the slides.
She smiled as she read through a slide, and I held my breath.
There was something intensely charming about her in the way she tilted her head and pursed her lips when she was focused.
Naya Donovan was not frumpy, she was subtle.
How had I never noticed that before?
At the meeting she was as always precise and emotionless. She gave her team the opportunity to present part of the slide deck to us executives and didn’t hog all the attention as so many managers did.
She had answers to questions thrown at her. Whenever I asked a question, I could see Naya's team stiffen like they were waiting for me to be tough on her. Ethan had warned me that everyone on her team noticed that I criticized Naya unfairly and they were all entirely on her side.
Why had I always been so harsh with her?
I remembered the first time I'd seen her at Nolan's place. She was a kid, around thirteen, I think. She hadn't talked much but had always smiled when Hayes, I and others came over. It had taken a couple of times before I realized that she not only cooked for us but for her family on a daily basis.
I was further shocked that at such a young age, she took care of the house and everyone who lived there. Sure as hell, Nolan didn't, even though he lived there.
His theory was that he was in MIT and his focus was his education—and his family supported him.
She supported him. But even without being told explicitly, I knew he wasn't there for her.
She was alone…well except for Darren Wright.
She was dating an ex-football player. He had a shit ton of money, why wasn't he helping her pay down her father's debt or buy her a car?
I knew why. I may not know a whole lot about Naya but what I did know is that she was prideful and had integrity. She wouldn't take a handout.
I started to notice her crush when we were getting ready to graduate.
She was around sixteen, still so young. Whenever we went to Nolan's place she watched me with adoring eyes.
Some of the guys had observed it as well and gave me a hard time about the jailbait.
It had annoyed me. I started to bring a girl along whenever we came to Nolan's place, so Naya didn't get any ideas.
Yeah, I was that arrogant, because without a girlfriend as a shield, Naya would be all over me.
With a girl by my side, she didn't even talk to me.
We liked going to Nolan's place and even though he'd been uncomfortable in the beginning because his father's house was not as opulent as our parents' homes—once he'd seen how good a time we had, he'd calmed down.
A big attraction was how easy it was to be at Nolan's place because it was casual.
His father was awesome. Down to earth and friendly, always ready to give advice and listen—a far cry from my own father.
The first couple years of university, we went to Nolan's place often to hang out, study, eat dinner, stuff like that.
But then he moved out of his house and into an apartment with us.
We still went to his father's place but not as often.
Naya was always sweet. Hayes was the only one of us who actually talked to her. He'd stay in the kitchen with her while she cooked. I used to ask him why he was hanging out with a high school kid, and he said she was smart and interesting. Even then she wore sad plain clothes.
I'd mentioned it to Hayes, and he'd bitten my head off for it.
"You know not everyone is rich like us, right?
Her father is putting Nolan through MIT—because he's not eligible for need's based scholarship.
They're not rolling in money. She takes care of the house and bags groceries to support her family.
I don't think it matters what the fuck she wears. She's a rockstar in my book."
I'd been ashamed of myself. Maybe my resentment built then because she was so much better than I was.
She wasn't the first girl who had a crush on me. There had been others. But somehow I'd disliked her interest in me. Whenever she tried to talk to me, I politely shut her down. And after a while she didn't even try. Instead of being relieved, I’d been more annoyed.
I still saw her the few times she came from California to visit—and it was still there, that shy adoration.
After she moved back to Boston, I saw her when she was at Nolan's old place to drop off or pick up something.
We'd all be hanging out and she would get in and get out as quickly as humanly possible—but I still noticed her watching me with affection.
It was a week before Naya overhead my conversation with Ann that I'd seen her outside of work. Naya was picking up Magnus from Nolan's house. We were there for a dinner party, one she had not been invited to because she was once again babysitting.
Hayes had talked to her and asked her to join us for a drink. She had that look in her eyes again. It had made me uncomfortable as hell. She worked in my company; she couldn't look at me like I was the fucking love of her life.
"You okay?" Ann asked quietly so the others at the dinner table wouldn't overhear us.
"Yeah."
"Is she bothering you?"
"She works at Midas," I said nonchalantly.
"She makes you uncomfortable," Ann jeered.
"Yeah, maybe. Let it go, Ann."
At work, Naya would sometimes watch me with her big doe eyes, but she didn't try to talk to me until it was necessary.
Hell, for the first couple of years at Midas, she barely greeted me.
It was only when she was promoted by Ethan that I started to see her in meetings.
That was when I reverted back to being the asshole I used to be when she was a kid—pushing her away, telling her as clearly as I could without saying the words that I was not interested in her.
When Ann mentioned that Naya had a crush on me, I hadn't been surprised to hear it.
I didn't see her much socially anymore but when I did it was evident.
Did I like it? Or did it still piss me off?
I knew I wasn't indifferent to it. At work, she was professional.
Apparently to the point that when I tried to be personal just now she'd ended the conversation.
None of this though explained why I picked on her at work. It baffled me just as it had Ethan and Naya's team. She probably wondered what she'd done to piss me off.
She's done nothing. Absolutely nothing!
I had to do better, I promised myself. I didn't have to become best friends with her, but I did need to treat her with respect. She deserved that.
After the meeting, I called out to Naya as everyone was filing out of the conference room. Her colleague, Mila stopped. She was the one who'd called Ethan and tattled on me. I didn't even know Naya and she were friends. But they were, and Mila was loyal to Naya. Apparently, her whole team was.
"Just Naya. Mila, you can go," I instructed.
Mila looked like she was about to say something, but Naya shook her head subtly, and Mila left.
Naya didn't move from her chair. She sat calmly with her hands on her now closed laptop. The conference room had glass walls, and I knew people would be watching to see what the boss would say to his favorite punching bag.
"Let's take this to my office." I rose and walked out, hoping she'd follow me. Of course, she would. This was work and I was the fucking CEO of the company.
What are you doing, Amias?
I didn't hold the door for her and just walked into my office and barked at her to shut the door behind her. I rested my ass against my table and pointed at a chair in front of me. "Sit."
She did as I told her to and put her laptop and papers on her lap.
"Ethan called me a few days ago and mentioned that you and your team think I'm too hard on you."
Her eyes flickered with panic for a hot second and then were serene again. How the fuck did she do that? How did she control her expressions so well?
"I haven't talked to Ethan since he went on paternity leave," she spoke softly, not looking at me. "I have no idea why he'd say what he did to you."
"Do you and your team think that?" I demanded.
She swallowed, still not looking at me. "No one has said anything to me, and I haven't said anything to anyone."
"I'm asking you then, do you think I'm too hard on you?"
She looked up finally at me, her gaze moving away from her hands that were resting on her laptop. I was feeling like a monster having this conversation with her. But she was so controlled that I wanted to shatter her cool, see what lay beneath her drab clothes and quiet shell.
"Compared to?"
"Compared…say to Ethan?"
She shrugged. "You're both very different people. Your leadership styles are different."
"How are we different?"
She cleared her throat. "Ethan has a servant-leader philosophy."
"And me?"
"I don't know. I don't work for you. Ethan says you're fair and intelligent. And that you have strong instincts. He thinks of you as a boss and friend. He has tremendous respect for you."
"And you? Do you have respect for me?"
What the fucking hell are you trying to pull, Amias. Shut up and let her go. You're digging a hole here you won't be able to get out of.
"Yes, absolutely."
She had full lips. She licked them a lot and bit them, so they were ripe.
I wanted to taste her lower lip and…what in the world was wrong with me?
I was getting sex on the regular with Ann.
Damn good sex. She was wanton and ready to try anything.
This mouse probably just did missionary.
She'd be too vanilla for me, and I wanted to nibble on that soft lower lip of hers. I was losing my fucking mind.
"Naya, we're going to be working together on Project Phoenix so if you have any issues with my style of leadership, I'd prefer to hear it from you, not from Ethan."
Fuck that was unfair! She'd not gone to Ethan. I knew that. But she was so goddamn stoic that it was like a red cloak in front of a bull, which was me, angry for no good fucking reason.
"I have no issues with your leadership style."
I stared at her for a long moment.
"Is there anything else?" she smiled gently. Her gray eyes lit up. She was uncomfortable as hell in this meeting, I'd made sure of that and yet her eyes didn't show any turmoil. They were peaceful. What inner strength did this woman have?
"Yes. I know you said not to bring personal stuff into work, but I don't see you socially often enough except apparently around the streets and restaurants of Back Bay. I'm sorry about how Ann talked to you and your…ah boyfriend."
I still couldn't get over the fact that she was dating an ex-football player.
Ann had been incensed about it and jealous.
I was surprised…and annoyed. Yeah, I was irritated that she had a boyfriend that I knew nothing about.
Nolan had never mentioned him. Hell, Kara kept talking about how Naya had no life.
Darren fucking Wright! They must be close because of the ease with which he handled Nolan's kid.
It was obvious that Magnus knew Darren and was comfortable enough to be held by the giant of a man and play with him.
Naya rose. "Why are you apologizing for Ann?"
The question surprised me. "Because I was with her."
"You have nothing to apologize for." Her voice was low, smooth.
She didn't seem the kind who ever threw a hissy fit.
No, she was probably always gentle. What kind of sounds did she make when a man pounded his dick into her?
Did she moan? Did she—fucking hell, now I was getting hard thinking about curve-less drab Naya?
But she has curves, the fucking devil on my shoulder smirked. She just hides them.
"Maybe so, but I didn't like how she talked to you."
"Then you should tell her that. Have a good rest of your day."
Good fucking point!
She then lowered her head and walked out of my office.
I ran a hand through my hair. When did Naya start to twist me into knots like this?