Mia
His words echoed in my brain, making me dizzy.
Though, I had to admit, that might have been because his very presence was overwhelming in the best way.
I wasn’t sure if I could even focus with him this close to me.
I mean, he smelled like smoke from an incense, the kind my wai po would burn as she prayed, and it gave me a sense of home and belonging.
When Xavir spoke, it was like a branch breaking behind you in the dark of the night. It was slow and purposeful, but deep and rumbly. Everything about him was a surprising mystery that I wanted to uncrack, and every word felt like the beginning of a song I could only ever hope to compose.
I had so many questions, so many things I wanted answers to. I knew I should have been concerned, maybe even afraid. Maybe I did feel those things, but what I knew almost for certain was that he was here. With me.
And I didn’t feel lonely anymore.
Balancing myself on one palm, I lifted the other, letting my curiosity get the best of me, and I slid it across the side of his horn.
Xavir gave a rumbling sound I couldn’t decipher. His entire body jolted, pushing down against mine. His black eyes were blue in the light glowing from the center of his chest, like there was fire in those depths.
“Did I hurt you?” I jerked my hand away.
He groaned. “It is the opposite. You have brought me life in ways I cannot even begin to describe to you.”
That was… romantic.
My chest warmed. In fact, my entire body did.
I tried to focus, though. It was hard to think when he was so close to me. My legs were spread wide and he’d notched himself in between them like that’s where he belonged. I didn’t even think he did it purposefully, the same way I hadn’t even realized my legs had opened to accommodate him.
We were indecently close, so much so that I felt the warmth from his skin and the texture along the gray surface.
Different from my own, it was grainy and rough and solid.
Every inch of him was wide, but he cut a lithe figure.
I was on the taller side, but he was taller than anyone I’d ever known.
And still, he hunched his body over mine in an attempt to be at eye-level with me.
Like he would make himself smaller if he only could.
The wings at his back were pulled tightly together, bunched in a way that hid them from view. Long, dark hair slid from over his strong shoulders, falling in sleek waves between our chests. A curtain that hid my rapid breathing as much as his.
“So, you’re from the Underworld?” My throat felt heavy with words and emotion.
He nodded, all-black eyes searching.
“And you came here to find a wife?”
He nodded.
“And you choose… me?”
“I choose you, Mia.”
“I’m not a pokémon…”
He paused and it was like I could see the gears in his mind spinning over each other as he tried to process.
“I am unfamiliar with that word.”
“It’s a cartoon…”
“I do not know a cartoon. Is that a state of emotion?”
Oh, wow.
“Never mind. I was only joking anyway.”
His sharp teeth flashed, and I had a strange feeling he was smiling, though it looked almost grotesque. How different we were.
“Your joy brings me to the height of happiness, and I should want to feel no other way.”
So he really did talk like that.
“You’re serious?” My brows scrunched together. “Like, you seriously want to be with me? Make me your wife?” Why wasn’t I more afraid of that prospect? Instead, I felt giddy.
“Only you,” he whispered. There was so much promise packed into those two little words, that the breath left me for a split second.
“I–I don’t understand, Xavir. Why? What’s going on? Why didn’t you write back to me today? And why were you hiding on the ceiling instead of knocking and asking to hang out?”
His head tilted to the side and a slip of long hair slid over his shoulder. “Hang out?” he echoed. “The claws on my feet allow me to suspend myself from the ceiling, but I am doubtful that your anatomy would allow for such a thing.”
Lord, he was very literal.
“‘Hang out’ is just an expression,” I explained patiently. “It means to spend time together.”
“Ah. I see. Humans do have many expressions.” His teeth flashed again, and it felt like I was being gifted with another smile. “I shall explain, then.” He moved to sit back on his haunches, only this time he pulled me up with him.
His skin was as hard as marble, though his flesh was solid and warm.
I found myself straddling him, and I didn’t care that this was technically our first meeting.
That he’d been a voyeur on my ceiling for who knew how long.
I just cared that he was in front of me, the man behind the letters that I so deeply cherished. Finally, I had him.
And I didn’t want to let him go.
My hands slid up and down the space where his neck met his shoulder, exploring the texture of his skin for a second.
He pressed close, his hands finding my waist. I could tell he was being cautious with his claws, for his touch was gentle, barely there.
I wanted to tell him I wouldn’t break, but he was already speaking.
“I was born of scorched earth,” he explained darkly, holding me captive not just with his arms, but with his gaze as well.
“I was born of secrets and pain, and so the kings of the Underworld imbued me with their essence, giving me a fraction of their power in order to create a Spymaster and a soldier. For eons, my brothers, Nazzar, Qanek, and I, have dominated the Underworld, fighting for our kings, leading their armies to battle wayward demons and souls. It was what we were made to do. But, eventually, we wanted more. We wanted what our kings had found. We wanted…”
“Love?” I supplied, when he seemed to struggle to find the word.
He nodded his head in confirmation. “Do you know what it is to be alone, even as you are surrounded by many beings, many souls, but to truly feel as though you have nothing, no one?”
My heart lurched at what he was saying, because I understood all too well.
“I know what that’s like,” I confessed.
“I only want someone to share my world with, and to share their world with me. It is all I ever desired, more than anything. And so, my brothers and I decided we would disobey the kings of hell and come to find those who would love us–want us.” He paused, his thumbs swiping across my hip bones delicately.
The touch made me shiver. He seemed to smirk before he continued, “Nazzar found his bride first, a human he calls Dolores. In our culture, we steal our brides and mate them as proof of our devotion.”
Something in my heart lurched at that, and confusion prattled through me. Steal? Mate? I regarded him carefully, trying not to let hurt breathe through my words. “If you say you want me as a wife, why didn’t you steal and mate me?”
What a ridiculous question. I wanted to berate myself, but bit the inside of my cheek instead. Was I so messed up in the head that I was really upset that he hadn’t kidnapped me?
Insanity.
He must’ve read whatever it was I tried hard to hide, because Xavir leaned forward, his hair curtaining us into our own, private little world. The tip of his pointed nose touched mine, and I was sure he could feel the flush blooming over my skin.
“Do you want me to steal you away, my little flower?” he purred.
Purred.
The sound actually rumbled from his chest and made me flush in more places than one.
“I’m just confused is all.”
“Hmm.” He touched the tip of his nose to mine and then pulled back just as quickly. “Nazzar stole his wife, but he later found Qanek and I and warned us that it was against human custom to steal your bride. That it was a thing for the sick and the depraved.”
Well, then.
I guess I was sick and depraved, because the idea of being stolen away by him in the middle of the night excited me.
“Yeah, that’s true, I guess.” Why did I sound so damn disappointed? Get a grip, Mia.
Xavir smirked knowingly, almost as if he could read my thoughts.
“I heeded my brother’s advice, stalking and observing through the shadows for a woman who would catch my eye.
And then I saw you, and it was as though the world itself stopped breathing so that you would become the main focal point.
The world stopped to observe as you opened your case and took that instrument to your shoulder and played.
And the world listened–I listened, Mia. It was in your song that I was ensnared, and I knew I never wanted to be released from your hold.
I wanted you. You. Only you, for you kept me hypnotized from the moment I heard and saw you.
“There is no music in hell, but I recognized heaven in the melody your fingertips created from the very first moment. What–” Xavir’s eyes widened. “What is this, my little flower?” His clawed finger came up, catching a tear as it fell from my eyes.
I had been crying the entire speech, my heart caught in my throat, preventing words from coming out.
He’d watched me; for a while, he had watched me.
He’d heard me. He’d fallen for my music, for me.
And these words he was gifting me with were words I’d only ever dreamt of receiving.
I never thought I’d get them. I never thought I’d find someone who would feel so strongly.
“They’re called tears.”
“I know them.” The slashing lines of his brows pulled together with displeasure. “Have my words caused you pain?”
I quickly shook my head, knowing I probably looked a mess. “No, it’s just… The words are so sweet and I’m moved by them, so much that I’m crying tears of happiness.”
Xavir made a noise before leaning forward. That gray-black, forked tongue slowly darted out, and I flinched before relaxing as he caught the tears at the tip, licking them slowly away. The wet warmth made my skin tingle.
When he finished, he leaned back and cupped my face with his palms. The graze of his sharp claws was dangerous, but he treated me gently, so gently that I wasn’t even afraid.