Taina
FAR TOO SAFE
I neglected to mention that my mother invited you to our family home this weekend.
To meet me?
It’s the anniversary of our father’s passing. She’s throwing a party to celebrate him. You’ll meet one of my brothers too. The other is in México, but you’ll meet him soon too.
When you say “this weekend” you mean…
Tomorrow. I’ll have Berto take you shopping.
I will kick your fucking ass.
I check my phone again but of course Emiliano hasn’t responded. That mother?—
I’m sorry, Princesa. She only told me yesterday and then you weren’t feeling well so it slipped my mind.
I sigh. This was not the text I wanted to wake up to. Emiliano has never seen me get ready for an event. He has no idea the amount of work that I put into it, now that I’m alive again.
So I rush to get dressed, knowing I’ll have to get my hair done, get something to wear and new heels to match. And depending on what I choose, I might have to buy makeup too. Maybe even jewelry.
What’s my limit?
The sky.
Say less. It’s the perfect remedy for mangled little heart.
When I saw that Papi had been shot, I mourned the man I’d always hoped he’d be.
He was supposed to protect me and instead, they silenced me, sent me to a therapist who wanted money more than she wanted to help me, and allowed me to get high so I’d stop having nightmares.
While the weed helps with my PTSD, I think they loved how still it made me.
I refused anything else that was offered to me.
The nightmares slowed down, and then one day, they just stopped.
But the body remembers, even when the mind tries to forget. While the nightmares subsided, I still had issues with being touched or even looked at. It took days of torture for me to miss nearly a year of my life.
With Berto in tow, we head into the city, where there are far more options for someone with my hips and ass. We head to The Domain first, and I tell Berto to drop me off out front and to stay in the car. He hesitates, but I reassure him that I’ll be quick.
Honestly the idea of shopping with him breathing down my neck doesn’t seem appealing at all. Although Berto has been something close to friendly, I’d rather not have him around if I start getting down on myself because I don’t like the way the clothes are fitting.
This isn’t the same body that used to fit clothes effortlessly. But it’s not only my size that’s changed, it’s the amount of coverage I desire. I don’t mind form-fitting clothes, but anything that reveals a lot of skin makes me feel far too naked.
Add in that I’m meeting Emiliano’s family members and I want to make sure I look respectable.
With a huff, I try to shove my impending anxiety out of my mind and step inside one of the high-end department stores I’d always wanted to purchase from. My parents are well off, but they certainly didn’t allow me to wear anything that costs some people’s monthly rent.
My hope is, with luxury clothing items, there’ll be more assistance in making sure I not only look great, but that what I purchase is everything I want it to be.
Almost instantly, a woman approaches, asking if she can help me with anything. I explain that I’m going to meet my boyfriend’s family and I’d like to look sexy but sophisticated.
“Oh, that’s so fun,” she exclaims, and I nod with a slow smile. “And you’re wanting to be more reserved, yes?”
Her eyes rove over my frame, and she taps her chin with her index finger, twisting her lips.
“There are some options that come to mind,” she tells me, placing her hand on the back of my shoulder to lead me to the dressing rooms. “Let’s get you settled in, and I’ll be right back.”
Not even three months ago, I would’ve backed out of her touch. I also wouldn’t be in a store like this, looking for something to wear. Nor would I believe I’m having sex with a man and I let him tie my ass up . Well, my wrists. But still. Growth!
She returns with a few items and stands in the large changing area, waiting for me to remove my clothes with her hands on her hips.
“Don’t be shy, we have the same parts,” she grins as she says it. And if I didn’t think she was just far too helpful for her own good, I’d call her a pervert.
But I go along with it, removing my clothes before stepping into the first garment. She comes behind me to zip the dress up, and we can’t get the zipper up over my hips.
She hums, helping me take it off before handing me another.
“You try that on, and I’ll grab a larger size in this one. I haven’t given up hope yet.”
She scurries out, and I sigh, already feeling the beginnings of frustration. Rather than obsess over the dimples in my thighs and the stretch marks on my ass, I grab my phone and send a picture of me in my bra and panties to Emiliano.
If he’s going to inconvenience me, I’ll return the favor.
Taina…
I stand there with my phone in my hands and wait on his next text, the bubbles indicating him typing out another response.
You’d better be wearing less than that when I get home.
With a giggle, I toss the phone away and step into the next dress, already loving how it slips over my body. But when I get it the rest of the way on, the neckline hangs lower than I’m comfortable with.
I’m taking it off when the saleswoman who was helping me returns. She has more options, but holds up her hand as she approaches.
“I know we discussed a dress, but based on your desire to be more covered, I thought we could also try a couple jumpsuits. I think they’d accentuate your amazing figure while giving off more sophisticated than sexy.”
Damn, she’s good.
“Okay,” is all I manage to say before she’s shoving one of them in my direction, informing me that this one is the most promising.
“I saw it and I had to bring it over.”
I step in like jeans and begin tugging the fabric up, which causes her to step behind me.
“May I?” she asks, and I don’t know what she means but I nod.
She tells me to stand straight as she bends, her hands gently bringing the garment over my hips.
I don’t look at my reflection, opting to wait until it’s fully on to take a look.
“Now, you’ll need a strapless bra, and if you don’t have one, I can help you with that too. ”
She finishes zipping me up, and as I turn to look at myself, I hear her say, “Hell yeah. You look hot.”
And I’m forced to agree. The top looks almost like a suit vest but strapless. And the bottom is flared in a way that still manages to accentuate my lower half.
“What kind of shoes, do you think?” I ask as I tilt my head to examine, standing on my tiptoes to imagine what I’ll look like in heels.
“You know it’s my job to get you to buy things, right? You’re making it far too easy for me right now.” She chuckles, and I smile in response.
“I haven’t gotten anything other than casual clothes in a very long time.” This is an entirely different experience.
Even when I’d gone shopping with Emiliano for essentials, it hadn’t been anything quite like this. And while I’m sure he’d be open to it, this is something I’m far more comfortable doing alone.
I’ll thank him properly for funding this excursion later tonight.
The saleswoman, who tells me to call her CoCo, is a flurry of activity as she helps me with a strapless bra, measuring me and adding a few everyday bras to the pile. Apparently I’d been wearing the wrong size for quite some time.
She then finds me heels and a matching purse to go with tomorrow’s ensemble. By the time I’m walking out of there, I’ve spent far more than I’m comfortable with. I’m about to step off the curb when my phone vibrates with a notification.
Next time, spend more.
This man is insane, I’m convinced.
Are you one of those guys who gets off on having a woman spending your money?
I’m a man who wants you to reap the benefits of all of my hard work.
I meet Berto at the car, seeing that he parked in the fire lane with the hazard lights blinking.
He looks up just as I reach the door, opening his and rushing to grab my shopping bags from me.
When he’s finished, he opens the passenger door for me, and once I’m seated, he closes it and rounds the car.
He enters the car, his eyes flitting to the rearview before pulling off.
“Anywhere else?”
I debate on stopping at the salon my mother frequents for a blowout. It’ll be hot tomorrow, so I’ll probably prefer to have my hair off my neck.
An idea strikes, and I tell Berto to head to the nearest home improvement store.
I haven’t been as focused on getting the house redecorated, and with the beautiful new vanity now set up in one of the spare room, I want to start tackling upstairs.
I want to share a bedroom with Emiliano, but I’d like to have a space for my own interests like makeup and…
whatever else I pick up along the way. Maybe I’ll finally learn to crochet.
And I plan on getting some sort of man cave or office going for him. I think a mixture of both would be perfect; a place he can work and unwind, if he chooses to.
I’d already experimented with some swatches of paint downstairs, but none of them looked quite right. The last time I asked Emiliano what he thought, he laughed at my frustration before having sex with me on the couch we’re meant to replace.
“I hope you’re more help than your employer,” I mutter as Berto pulls into the parking lot.
“I won’t make any promises,” he tells me as he parks the car before looking at me. “Mr. Pineros is good at many things. Things I’m sure you wouldn’t trade for him to know about paint.”
He’s silent as I stare at him, blinking, because at what point did we lose our sense of humor?
“Obviously, I love him just as he is,” I say without thinking, and my eyes widen once I realize. “Don’t tell him I said that.”
Refusing to sit there, basking in my slip up, I open the door and hop out. I swear I heard Berto chuckle, but as he walks up beside me, he’s back to his stoic self.
The doors slide open, and I ask him to get a shopping cart while I mosey on over to the paint section. All while I walk, I keep my eyes peeled for the paint section.
But I felt far too safe and because of that, I nearly miss seeing an all too familiar face.
A face I’ve long wished to forget.
He’s not alone, the monster walking alongside a blonde woman that I’ve seen him with far too many times. I know exactly who she is.
As if he can feel me staring, he glances in my direction, and I try to duck out of the way but I’m sure he saw me.
My hands shake, and I try to rush toward the bathroom but I feel like he’s everywhere. Even if I go to the bathroom, who’s to stop him from going inside? Or from sending her in after me?
I didn’t miss the items he carried in his hands, and his presence here shocks and confuses my nervous system.
I duck behind a register, glancing up at the woman working.
“Please,” I whisper as she looks down at me, her brows pinched in concern. “There’s a man here who…he…” I can’t make the words out, and she shushes me, holding her hand out.
She begins ringing someone out, and I see the rope, the zip ties, and the duct tape, along with the plastic lining you use to cover things when painting.
I try not to move much so they can’t see me, digging my phone out of my pocket to text Emiliano.
Help me. He’s here.