Chapter 15
The drive home is a blur of thoughts and emotions, with Henry’s almost-confession replaying in my mind—his voice, the way he said my name, the unspoken words hanging between us.
I turn the dial of my radio, trying to drown out the feeling of being out of control—a feeling I usually loathe, but tonight, it felt different.
By the time I step into my apartment, I’m buzzing. There’s only one person who can help me sort through this chaos, and thankfully, she picks up the FaceTime call on the first ring.
“Hello?”
“Hey! Do you have a few minutes? I need help picking out an outfit.”
I barrel through my bedroom door and almost trip over the pile of dirty clothes in the middle of my room. I really need to do the laundry.
“Oh. My. God. Do you have a date? Please tell me you have a date.”
I roll my eyes with a playful smile before propping up my phone on my dresser. “No. I’m going to this trivia night thing with Henry and his brother.”
Before Wren can answer, I hear a creak above me and confirm Henry is in his apartment.
“Two men at once? Not really my thing, but I’m here for it.”
“Wren,” I groan, pulling a top from the pile and tossing it onto the growing stack of rejects.
“Okay, fine, but you never call me about outfit emergencies, so something major must be happening. Spill.”
I pause, a nervous flutter building in my belly. “Something happened today,” I admit, my voice quiet.
“Oh?” Her voice drips with intrigue. “Did he finally make a move?”
I swallow hard, and my cheeks swell with a pinkish-red color as I remember the feeling of his lips on mine. “We kissed,” I blurt out, not offering any build-up.
At first, there is complete silence, and then Wren’s eyes widen on the screen. “What?! Oh my God, Emma! Details. Now.”
My eyes dart to the time on my phone, knowing I don’t have much time to debrief. I also know that Wren won’t let up unless I tell her everything. I flop onto my bed, clutching a shirt in one hand like a lifeline.
“It wasn’t planned or anything. It just…
happened. We were about to hike to scout out a location for his book, and then we started rehashing that tense moment at the library.
One thing led to another, and I told him about my mom.
And then there was a moment… A moment when he looked at me like he wanted to be my rock.
Like I didn’t have to hold onto all this pain by myself.
It felt like everything stopped, and then it felt like nothing else existed. ”
“Wow, Emma,” Wren whispers. “You told him about your mom? That’s huge.”
“Not everything,” I backtrack. “I just felt like I owed him an explanation for being a jerk the other night.”
“I think it’s more than that. You felt like you could confide in him and that’s not easy for you to do. I should know,” she says with a lighthearted laugh. “So, what happened after that?”
I bite my lip, the memory flooding back and setting my heart racing all over again.
“He kissed me. At first, it was sweet, like I expected. But then it got deeper like he was telling me something he couldn’t say out loud. And for a second, I thought—” I pause, letting the weight of our moment settle over me. “No, I knew I could let him in.”
Wren’s expression eases on the screen, her usual teasing replaced with quiet support. “Em, that’s incredible. I’m so happy for you.”
I sigh, dropping the shirt I’m holding onto my bed.
“But it’s not that simple. Afterward, we barely had time to process it before we found this stray, and then we ended up at his dad’s house.
Oh. And then we almost talked about it, but his brother interrupted,” I say, recalling the events of the last few hours. It has been a long day.
“Long story short, I don’t know what it means.”
“Yeah, that is tough,” she replies, her own voice trailing off. “But if you ask me, it seems like he’s into you.”
“Even if he is, I’m not sure what I would do. Milo comes first, always. And Henry has his own stuff going on. And there’s the fact that he’s going back to his job at the end of the summer. It still feels too complicated.”
“Easier doesn’t mean better,” Wren corrects me. “You’ve been carrying so much on your own, Em. Maybe it’s time to let someone help you, even if it’s messy. You can’t keep everyone at arm’s length forever.”
Her words hit me where it hurts the most. “I know you’re right,” I mutter, picking at a loose thread on the comforter. “But what if I open that door and he doesn’t want to stay? What if I let him in, and he changes his mind.”
“Or,” Wren counters, her voice steady and sincere, “what if he doesn’t? What if this is exactly what you’ve been waiting for?”
“Yeah,” I respond quietly. The harsh reality of her statement pokes against my heart. “I’m just frustrated. Now we’re stuck in this weird limbo until we talk. We’re going to this trivia thing tonight like nothing happened.”
Wren smirks. “Oh, I wouldn’t say it’s like nothing happened. Trust me, Henry is going to be thinking about that kiss all night because you’re going to look hot.”
I can’t help but laugh, her infectious energy lifting some of the worry off my chest. “Sure,” I say, not convinced.
“Hell yes, you are,” she answers confidently.
“Here’s what I’m thinking. Do you know that black sleeveless bodysuit with the scoop neckline?
I think that shows off the perfect amount of cleavage without giving anyone a heart attack.
Pair that with some light wash jeans and those high-heeled black boots I let you borrow a few months ago. ”
I nod with a determined look and head toward my closet. I throw the doors open and peel away the front layer of clothes hanging in front of me. I find the bodysuit immediately and swallow hard when I notice the price tag is still attached.
I bought the top during my last shopping trip with Wren. She had to beg me to buy it, and I wasn’t surprised she wanted me to wear it tonight. It made my tits look incredible, but that wasn’t what made me insecure.
My body has never been the same after giving birth, and areas that used to be smooth and toned are soft and round. I was prone to covering up with flowy tops and jeans with waistlines that went all the way up to my belly button. Now I know why they call them mom jeans.
I take a deep breath and finally pluck the price tag off. I quickly throw on the outfit Wren recommended, and after a balancing act that could rival an acrobat, I squeeze my curves into the outfit and position myself in front of the mirror.
“You look hooottttt,” Wren screams from my phone.
She’s right. I do look hot. I take my hands and let them explore the curves that slope down like a roller coaster, starting at the bend of my breasts to the swells of my hips.
The heels make my butt pop, and the jeans help to hold everything together like a pretty package I didn’t know I was capable of wrapping.
“Wow. I can’t remember the last time I dressed up,” I state, picking up my phone from the dresser. “Should I leave my hair down?”
“Hmmm. I think half up, half down would look best. Especially with some hoops!”
I take her advice and sweep the front part of my hair into a clip at the back of my head. I pull out a few pieces in the front to hide the harsh dark roots peeking out at the edge of my hairline. I really need to get my hair done, but that isn’t at the top of my priorities right now.
While I attempt to freshen up my makeup, I see the time out of the corner of my eye and curse under my breath.
“Oh, crap. I better get going. Thanks, Wren. Love you!”
“Love you, Em. Have a great time, and call me tomorrow with an update.”
My finger hits the end button, and Wren disappears from my phone screen. I quickly dump all my necessities into a smaller purse that doesn’t scream I’m a mom and head for the door.
As I’m opening the door, I’m met with Henry’s frame filling up the small space on my porch. His hand in a fist, getting ready to knock, but it seems like I beat him to it.
He drops his hand down to his side, and his entire body remains still. It’s quick, but I notice the way his eyebrows raise behind his glasses and how he forces his eyes to stay glued to mine.
The way his lips curl into an innocent, buttery, soft smirk sends a jolt of warmth to my core, making me feel confident in a way that’s been lying dormant for years.
I finally understood what Wren meant when she said Blake gives her butterflies.
It is something you truly don’t understand until you experience it.
“Hi,” I croak, breaking the silence.
“Are you ready?” he questions, reaching behind his neck to scratch a hidden itch nervously.
“Yep,” I respond before joining him on the tiny porch.
Henry steps back to give me room while I lock my door. I can feel the heat radiating off him from inches away. I swallow cautiously and attempt to focus on the simple task of turning a key. It’s hard to do when I can feel his eyes searing into my body.
When I finally hear the click of confirmation, I turn around to find Henry’s gaze lower than it was moments ago. A feeling of triumph begins to manifest. Henry’s eyes snap up to mine when he notices me turning around. He covers up his traveling stare with a friendly smile.
His smile lingers as he steps aside, letting me move past him. The air between us feels charged, and for a moment, I think he’s going to say something. Instead, he shifts his weight, glancing at the porch, deciding his next move.
“So,” he says, breaking the spell. “Ready to head out?”
I nod, not trusting my voice just yet, and follow him to the driveway.
"I’m kind of excited for tonight. I feel like I haven’t gone out in a long time. The last time I stepped foot in a bar was the night I met you.”
Henry glances over his shoulder. “I remember,” he says quietly. “I think it will be fun. And your drinks are on me tonight. I owe you for today.”
“You don’t owe me anything,” I reply, trying not to sound too eager.
He lets out a low, rich laugh. “Let’s agree to disagree.”