Chapter Fifteen
“Hey, clown.”
Shane’s gut clenched at the sight of Matt ambling across the parking lot toward him, desire warring with residual anger.
God, he should be over it by now, but the depth of his hurt continued to surprise him.
Maybe it was just the pure humiliation of waiting so eagerly for someone who couldn’t even be bothered to say he’d changed his mind.
Shane was so fucking done with people who couldn’t be bothered.
“Hey.” He was heartily regretting the impulse that’d led him to ask Matt along on this Derek clusterfuck. The dude tied him up in knots, and that was the last thing he needed tonight. “Hop in.”
They didn’t speak on the way out to El Cajon.
Shane followed the directions Derek had given him, surprised when they pulled up in front of a large, elegant house with a well-kept yard.
His feelings must have shown on his face, because Matt glanced at him and said drily, “What, were you expecting a run-down crack house with used needles strewn everywhere?”
Annoyed, Shane snapped, “I don’t know what I was expecting, okay? Let’s go.”
He and Matt scuffed up the flagstone walk to the porch, Matt standing to the side as Shane rang the bell and pasted a smile on his face. The door was opened by a pleasant-looking middle-aged couple who greeted them effusively.
“Oh, I can tell you’re Alexis’s brother,” the woman exclaimed. “You look just alike.”
Shane shuffled his feet through the introductions.
As they all made awkward small talk, his discomfort grew.
He much preferred to imagine Derek as a loser and an asshole, not a guy who lived in a nice house with nice parents.
It seemed like an eternity until Derek himself appeared, tall and lanky in jeans and a Padres T-shirt, black hair pulled into a ponytail and threaded through the back of a baseball cap. His eyes were shy, his handshake firm.
At last his dad glanced at his watch. “You boys should get going.” He turned to Derek. “We’ll be waiting up, so if you would, text us when you’re on the way home, son.”
“I will.”
They said their goodbyes and headed for the car. To Shane’s dismay, Matt offered to take the cramped back seat so Derek would be more comfortable in the front. “Short guys always get the back,” he said jokingly. “I’m used to it.”
This time the silence was deafening. After a few minutes Matt kicked the bottom of Shane’s seat hard and made a get-on-with-it gesture, tilting his head toward Derek.
“What?” Shane mouthed at him in the rearview mirror, pretending not to know what he was getting at.
Muttering under his breath, Matt leaned forward between the two front seats.
“So Derek, whaddya do for living?”
Derek turned to him with a grateful smile. “I, uh, work with my dad in his plumbing business.”
“Aww, workin’ for your dad. I’ve been there.”
By the time they arrived at the ballpark, navigated the parking lot and were ambling toward the ticket windows, Matt and Derek were still chattering away.
They bought their tickets to go in, where Derek immediately excused himself to use the restroom.
While they waited, Matt poked Shane in the ribs. “Someone’s a moody dick tonight.”
Shane couldn’t deny it, but dammit, he resented the hell out of all this.
“I don’t like the guy, okay?”
“Really? Can’t tell.” Matt’s voice was laced with sarcasm. “What I don’t understand is why. You’ve given the dude zero chance and he seems nice enough.”
“I don’t care how nice he seems, he’s not good enough for my sister and I’m not a fan of wasting my time.”
“Jesus, that’s a shitty attitude.” Matt’s face hardened. “You’ve made no effort to get to know him so how can you say he’s not good enough?”
Shane made an incredulous sound. “Don’t you remember what I told you before? He’s a drug addict, Matt.”
“Yeah, I remember. So in your world people don’t get to make mistakes?”
Derek reappeared just then and Shane bit back his angry rejoinder, trailing sullenly behind the other two as they headed down the concourse.
They found their section, and before making their way to their seats, Derek turned and gestured toward a nearby concession stand.
“I know it’s not much, but can I treat you and Matt to a hot dog, Shane?
I really appreciate you guys inviting me out tonight. ”
When Shane ignored him, Matt accepted for both of them. “Hey, thanks, Derek. That’d be great.”
With a troubled glance at Shane, Derek strode up to the counter, pulling his wallet out of his back pocket.
Matt elbowed him. “Why is it so hard for you to just be pleasant and enjoy a night at the baseball game?”
“And why is it so hard for you to mind your own business?” Shane burst out, rounding on him. “You know fuck-all about what Alexis has been through, so one thing you don’t get to do is judge me for being protective of her.”
“Yeah, you’re right. I don’t know what she’s been through.” Matt paused for a beat. “Just like you don’t know what Derek has been through. It works both ways, Shane. Like it or not.”
He started to move off and Shane grabbed his arm, jerking him to a halt. “So after an hour with the guy, you’re his best friend now?” He ignored the way Matt glanced pointedly down at Shane’s hand on his biceps. “You’re just gonna blindly defend him to me? Why?”
Matt shook him off roughly. “You wanna know why? Because I’ve been where he is, and I wouldn’t be here now if someone hadn’t thought maybe there was something more to me than a goddamn mistake.”
He strode off to help Derek juggle the hot dogs and drinks, leaving Shane numb with shock. What was Matt saying, that he was an addict? That wasn’t possible. There was no way he could join the Navy, much less the SEALs, with any sort of drug history.
He had to be fucking with him. He had to be.
As he stood frozen, Matt and Derek approached with their hands full of food and cups of soda.
“I would’ve bought you both a beer,” Derek was saying, a faintly apologetic tone to his voice, “but I—”
“No, it’s fine,” Matt interrupted. “Shane’s driving and I don’t drink. It’s all good, man. Thanks.”
Derek thrust a Coke at him and Shane took it automatically, his mind racing. Shit. Matt didn’t drink. He’d said he didn’t like the way it made him feel, so Shane had just assumed he was a health nut who didn’t want to put anything like that into his body. But what if there was more to it than that?
Curiosity about Matt and what made him tick overtook Shane’s determination to remain aloof, so when they found their seats and settled in, he turned to Derek. “Thanks for the food. And for coming out tonight,” he said, proud that he didn’t sound as insincere as he felt.
Derek’s expression said he wasn’t fooled in the least. “I know you’re busy, and that Alexis made you call me, but I still appreciate you asking me.” After a short pause, he went on tentatively, “So are you a Miami fan, Shane?”
“Fuck, no. That owner is a prick.”
“I know, right? I heard one of his own season ticket holders is suing him.”
That led into a spirited discussion about baseball scandals past and present, and by the time they wound down and turned their attention to the field, the game was well into the fifth inning. Shane ignored Matt’s smirk.
Talking to the dude about baseball didn’t mean he liked him. Whatever.
“You guys wanna head out and beat the traffic?” Shane asked at the seventh inning stretch, relieved when both Derek and Matt agreed. Thankfully this awkward fucking night was on its way to being over.
Matt suggested they stop for coffee, so Shane pulled over into the first Starbucks he saw. Drinks in hand, they found a table on the patio and sprawled out.
“It’s been a long time since I’ve had a guys’ night,” Derek said at last. “Most of my friends don’t come around anymore.”
“Because they were drug friends?”
Derek’s eyes widened at Matt’s blunt question.
“Uh—”
“He’s like this with everyone,” Shane said drily. “Feel free to ignore him.”
“No, it’s okay. I brought it up.” Derek chuckled when Matt flipped Shane off. “Yeah, pretty much. It’s amazing how fast your new best friends disappear when you stop being the life of the party.”
“I hear that. Or when they call you just because they need a designated driver.”
Derek regarded him for a moment. “You said you don’t drink. Ever or anymore?”
Matt hesitated. He glanced at down at the table, then over at Derek, lips tight. “Anymore.”
“Are you an alcoholic, Matt?”
Shane held his breath waiting for Matt’s response.
“No, but I was well on my way to becoming one. My second DUI was a huge wake-up call.”
At that Shane choked on his sip of coffee and went into a coughing fit, gaping at Matt with incredulous eyes. Even Derek looked shocked.
“I was a minor the first time it happened. The sheriff was a family friend who called my dad to pick me up and then looked the other way.”
“And the second?” Derek’s voice was hushed. Shane couldn’t blame him. Looking at Matt, a veritable poster boy for clean living and peak physical fitness, it was impossible to picture him handcuffed in the back of some patrol car, disheveled and smelling of booze.
“I was a freshman in college, and this time there was no family friend.”
Derek stared at him a moment before shaking his head. “Shit, I’d never have guessed, not in a million years.” He paused. “Thanks for being honest with me. It’s nice to be around someone who sorta understands.”
They finished their coffee and headed for the car. As he drove, Shane kept stealing glances at Matt sitting in the back seat, his mind churning with questions he wasn’t sure he had a right to ask.
After seeing Derek safely home, Matt climbed into the front seat and sat rigidly, staring straight ahead.
“You want me to drop you at the base?” Shane asked tentatively. “Or—?”
“I know it’s late, but I’d kind of like to go for a run.” Matt sounded subdued. “If you don’t mind dropping me off…”