Chapter Twenty-Six - Joshua
CHAPTER TWENTY-SIX
Joshua
Elise doesn’t turn around when I step onto the porch, and I’m relieved to see that her shoulders aren’t tense and her breathing has finally evened out.
I brought her out here after her panic attack for some fresh air, but I might need it more than she does.
Anger twists my gut when I recall her fearful eyes and pale face only minutes ago. My hand twitches with the urge to make Tripp pay for everything he’s done, and I will—soon enough.
But I need to do this first.
I sit beside her on the couch, and she accepts the Chamomile tea I offer. “That was my sister’s favorite tea, you know.”
“Can you tell me more about Vanessa?”
I take in the stretch of trees and think of my sister for what feels like the hundredth time today. I normally avoid thoughts of her at all costs, but at Elise’s request, I push past the grief to reach the happier memories that I keep locked away.
For most people, it’s the happy memories that give them peace after they’ve lost a loved one, but not me. When I recall my sister’s glowing smile or snorting laughter, it feels like a white-hot blade slicing through my chest.
I’m the reason she’ll never smile again.
Still, when Elise looks at me like this—like there’s a human hidden beneath the monster—I can’t deny her anything.
“You remind me of her sometimes,” I tell her.
“She was unbelievably charismatic?”
I roll my eyes, and my low laugh echoes against the trees. When I look down to see Elise’s small smile, it knocks the air out of my lungs. Her smile is a rarity these days, but I plan to change that.
“She was stubborn and irritating.”
“Hey!” Her hand smacks my arm for the second time tonight, and I’m sure it hurt her more than it did me.
I lean into the couch and sling an arm around Elise, gently pulling her closer.
“She was quiet around most people, but not me. Damn, she had a mouth on her when she was pissed.” I raise my eyebrows. “And I pissed her off a lot.”
Elise leans in closer as I talk.
“I’d put empty milk cartons back in the fridge or leave the toilet seat up, and she would freak out. She kept saying she’d let me starve, but there was always food ready for me when I got home.”
“Sounds like we would’ve gotten along,” she says and places her small hand on my knee, which I reach out to take in my own.
Elise curls into my side, and I wonder which screwed-up situation she’s thinking about now.
Her father’s abandonment.
Tripp’s attack.
Mason’s betrayal.
Elise’s life has been turned upside down in the span of a few weeks.
All I want is to take that pain away from her, which is why I hate what I need to do next.
“We need to talk.”
“Wow, I thought we’d last at least twenty-four hours before this conversation,” she quips, but there’s a nervousness to her small smile.
I kiss her forehead again and breathe in her scent, relishing how she feels curled into me. I have a feeling it won’t last much longer.
“You’ll have to work harder to scare me off,” I tell her.
“Trust me, I’ve been trying for weeks.”
I want to laugh, but I can’t bring myself to.
It feels like a punch to the gut when Elise’s smile drops from her face, and she pulls her knees to her chest. “What do we need to talk about?”
“I know this is going to be difficult for you, but I wouldn’t ask if it wasn’t necessary.”
“Joshua, what is it?” she snaps.
“I need you to tell me exactly what happened in the basement with Tripp.”
She recoils on instinct. “What? No, Joshua, I can’t—you know that I can’t—”
I rest a hand on the nape of her neck. “It’s okay—”
She pushes me away. “You can’t ask me to relive that.”
“I know what I’m asking is a lot, but it’s important.”
“Why? Don’t you have security cameras to see for yourself?”
“There aren’t cameras in there, sensitive content and all,” I explain, and I hate how she cringes away from me. “I just need you to trust me on this one.”
My hands itch to pull her into my embrace and soothe her, but I force myself to give her space instead.
After a few moments, her breathing evens out, and I’m about to gently coax her into telling me about that day when she whispers, “What happened to Tripp after you shot him?”
My expression is perfectly composed when I answer. “That’s not something you need to worry about.”
“Then it doesn’t matter. You know enough of what happened.”
“I understand it’s a lot to ask, but I need you to trust me.”
“Trust me, Joshua. I have a right to know what happened to Tripp.”
“Just trust—”
She abruptly stands and walks to the door.
“Where are you going?”
“To bed,” she calls without looking back.
I’m in front of her in two long strides, and she glares up at me. “I’m not doing this with you. You can’t ask me to relive that day when you won’t even tell me what happened after.”
I place my hands on either of her shoulders. “You really want to know?”
She nods slowly, and I know it’s because her voice would shake with uncertainty if she spoke, but I grant her wish anyway.
“Do you remember what I told you happens to my prisoners?”
She nods, and it feels like only yesterday that I’d threatened her with that very fate.
“He’s been starved, isolated, and thoroughly beaten. He’s also being kept awake by electrical shocks. I need to know everything that happened so I know exactly how much he needs to suffer before I kill him and ensure that no one ever touches you again.”
I mutter a curse when she tenses beneath my touch.
My hands move to cup her cheeks, and I soften my tone. “I also need to know so we can avoid triggering another panic attack.”
“You’re going to kill him?” she asks, and the worry in her tone makes me sick.
She should want him to suffer just as much as I do.
“What did you expect? The fact that he disobeyed my order to leave the base was enough to put a bullet in his head, but after what he did to you? He signed his death sentence.”
She swallows but stays silent.
“Elise, I can’t let people think they can get away with hurting you. I need to do this to protect you.”
After a long moment, she finally nods, and I drop my hands from her face.
“Will you take me to my room?”
“Elise—”
“I’m not mad. I’ve had a long day; my back hurts, and I’m exhausted. Will you please take me to my room?”
This isn’t how I wanted our night to end, but the fatigue in her voice is too evident to ignore, so I oblige.
We reach the door to her room, and I hold it open for her, but she doesn’t step through it.
Instead, she closes her eyes, takes a deep breath, and tells me everything that happened in the basement, from the moment Ryder chained her wrists to the moment I shot Tripp.
Her voice is brittle, focused, and shaky, like she’s trying to tell the story while avoiding stepping on shards of glass.
It makes me miss being yelled at by her.
At least then, I’d get the fire that makes her cheeks flame with passion, and her eyes blaze in indignation.
Right now, her shoulders curl inward, her chin lowers submissively, and her skin turns sickly pale.
I knew when I asked her to tell me about what happened that it would be hard for me to control my temper—but the fury that I experience when I hear what she endured is unlike anything I’ve ever felt.
The need to hold her close rivals so violently with the need to make Tripp suffer.
My mind doesn’t only process the information she gives me, but paints the picture in perfect clarity.
She tells me that he shoved his fingers down her throat, and I can practically see it happening right in front of me, which does nothing to calm my bloodlust.
Whether she sees it or not, Elise doesn’t acknowledge my reaction. Every bit of energy goes into her story, like it’s taking everything in her to get through it.
She tells me how he kissed her before shoving her back to pull off her pants, and I see red.
She stops there. We both know what happened next.
“Happy now?” she asks, brown eyes narrowing to slits as she folds her trembling arms over her chest.
I engulf Elise in a hug before she has the chance to object. After a moment of hesitation, she relaxes in my arms, tears soaking the fabric of my shirt.
I don’t try to console or calm her. I only hold her close. My lips rest against her forehead, and I place soft kisses there.
“Nothing about this makes me happy,” I whisper, pulling away just enough to look into her puffy eyes. “I won’t let anyone hurt you ever again.”
“Don’t make promises you can’t keep.”
“Then I promise to always protect you,” I amend.
I can see in her eyes that she believes me before she nods. “You’re really going to kill him?”
I tuck a lock of hair behind her ear. “I need to.”
I can tell she still doesn’t like the idea, but she doesn’t object again.
With a step back, she pushes the door to her room open. “Can you get Ryder?”
My stomach twists with what can only be jealousy. “Why?”
Elise must pick up on my thoughts because she rolls her eyes. “To change the bandages before I sleep.”
“I’ll be right back.”
I’m out of her room and knocking on Ryder’s door only a minute later.
“Is Elise okay?” he asks as the door swings open.
I push past him. “She’s fine, but I need new bandages for her back.”
“I can—” His offer dies when I cut my eyes at him. “They’re over here.”
Ryder walks into his bathroom, and I hear him rustling through the cabinets before coming back out with a small box.
“Everything you need is inside.”
I take the box, but Ryder doesn’t let go right away. “You need to be careful. Her back isn’t the only thing that’s still healing.”
I glance down at my tear-stained shirt. “Yeah, I know.”
Ryder releases the box, and by the time I walk into Elise’s room, she’s already seated backward in a chair.
“Where’s Ryder?” she asks, but we both know I didn’t ask for his help.
“I can do it.”
I set the items out on the table, and when I turn to face Elise, she’s shrugging the button-up off her shoulders.