Chapter Thirty-Eight - Joshua
CHAPTER THIRTY-EIGHT
Joshua
When I walk into the kitchen two days later, Elise and Ryder are sitting at the counter eating a late breakfast. Neither one notices me at first, and I take the opportunity to watch them.
Elise is leaning back in the chair, laughing at something Ryder says, and his shoulders shake with a chuckle. Her hair is pulled back in a short ponytail, and even from behind, I can see the pieces that frame her smiling face.
I hope that smile will still be there after this conversation.
“Morning, Princess.” I stride into the room and wrap my arms around her.
She leans into me, and her glowing smile tilts upward. “Well, good morning to you, too.”
When Ryder meets my eye, he knows what’s about to happen.
“I should go,” he says, taking his and Elise’s dishes to the sink.
“No, stay! I feel like I haven’t hung out with you in days.”
“Actually, I was hoping to talk to you,” I tell her. “Alone.”
Her eyes flicker between Ryder and me, but he doesn’t look her way.
“About what?” Her muscles tense in my arms, and I sigh. This is not how I wanted to start this conversation.
I reluctantly remove my arms from around her and take the seat Ryder was occupying. He leaves the room without another word but sends me a good luck with this look before going.
“Joshua, what’s going on?”
My hand falls to her knee, and I rub reassuring circles there. “Nothing’s going on. It’s just—” I take a deep breath. “We need to go back to the base.”
She doesn’t say anything at first, only stares at me like she’s waiting for me to crack a smile and tell her that I’m joking. When I don’t, the pink that colors her cheeks drains along with her once-radiant smile.
I’m about to say something when she shoves my hand off and turns away from me.
I’ve dealt with a panicked Elise on more than one occasion, and damn if I haven’t learned a thing or two.
Despite my instincts, I don’t reach out to touch her again or try to reassure her with my explanations. Instead, I sit still and wait for her to get a hold of her breathing.
She covers her face with her hands, resting her elbows on the countertop, and I can just barely see her lip wobbling. I briefly wonder if I should’ve pulled her into our room for this conversation but decide it doesn’t matter.
Everyone else is already packing.
After two excruciatingly long minutes, she lifts her wary eyes to mine. “Why?”
“Between the fact that so many soldiers were injured in the attack and that we have no idea how the attackers got around our security, we’re not safe here anymore. I don’t have half of the resources here as I do at the base to figure out who did it and why.”
She tugs at the hem of her shirt. “Please, don’t make me go back.”
“This isn’t like before. No one is going to touch you.”
“No one was supposed to touch me before.”
“I know,” I admit. “But this really is different.”
Elise slides out of her chair with a shake of her head and strides out of the room. “I’m not going.”
I knew she wasn’t going to like this, and she has a good reason to be apprehensive, but that doesn’t change the fact that I need to go, and I refuse to leave her behind.
The slam of our bedroom door echoes through the house, and I make my way toward it. I reach for the door handle, and my composure starts slipping when I find the door locked.
“Open the door,” I clip.
Nothing.
Damn it.
“Open the door, or I’m kicking it down.”
“Be my guest. We won’t be here much longer anyway.” Her humorless chuckle steals the last of my sanity.
I kick the damn door down.
I’d already damaged the hinges trying to get into the room earlier this week, so it didn’t take much force.
Elise screams as the giant wooden door crashes to the ground—scratching the hell out of the floor—and she drops the stack of pants she was carrying out of the closet.
“Are you crazy?”
“I wasn’t before I met you,” I snap, kicking a piece of wood out of my way as I walk inside. “What’s your problem?”
“My problem?” She scoffs. “You’re kidding me, right?”
“Do I look like I’m kidding?”
“You look like you’ve forgotten what I went through there!”
I let out a long breath, the anger draining from each muscle as I relax them.
“Trust me when I say I will never forget what happened.” My long strides close the gap between us, and she doesn’t stop me from placing my hands on either of her shoulders. “I can’t change the past, but I can swear to you that it’ll never happen again.”
“How do you know?”
“Do you remember why I went back to the base two weeks ago?”
She finally looks up at me. “You went back to kill Tripp.”
“Yes, and I made it abundantly clear that anyone who even thinks about messing with you will suffer the same fate. This is nothing like last time.”
She doesn’t say anything, and her features remain hard, unconvinced.
“You’ll stay with me in our room. You’ll have security instead of a ‘babysitter,’ and you’ll be able to go wherever you want, whenever you want. I know you only have bad memories of the base, but give me a chance, and we can make some better ones.”
She steps into me, burying her face in my chest, and I revel in the pleasure of holding her.
“I don’t want to take steps backward,” she whispers after a few minutes of silence. “We’ve come so far.”
I step back and take her hand in mine. “Come on.”
She doesn’t question me as we head to my office. When we get there, I round the desk, grabbing the rectangular box and praying that this doesn’t come back to bite me in the ass.
“You’re right. We have come a long way, which is why I’m giving you this.” I hand her the box.
“You’re giving me a cell phone?” Her wide eyes inspect the object like it’s alien technology, but I can hardly blame her. She’s been without one for weeks now.
“I want you to be able to reach me without needing to go through someone else,” I confirm and take her face between my hands. “And I want you to understand that this is nothing like last time. You’re my fiancée now.”
She freezes, looking up at me like I’ve spoken another language. “Your what?”
Absolutely nothing on planet Earth can stop the smile that breaks across my lips.
I release her face only to take hold of her hand and kiss the ring there. “You, Elise Consoli, are my fiancée.”
“But—but I never agreed to marry you,” she says in a weak protest.
“Not yet, but you’re wearing my ring, and I have every intention of making you my wife, so we might as well adopt the term.”
Elise’s cheeks turn my favorite shade of pink, and she bites her lip to hold back a smile. “Okay.”
“Okay?”
“We’ll go back to the base,” she agrees, and the look of complete and utter trust in her gaze nearly brings me to my knees. “If you say things are going to be different, then they’re going to be different.”
I pull her in for a long, adoring kiss. “They will be, I promise.”
I place a hand on Elise’s thigh for the fourth time to stop her leg from shaking. I don’t bother reassuring her that everything will be okay because she swears she already knows. If only her body were as sure.
We’re approaching the gate when I get a message from Ryder, who left half an hour before us to ensure they’d be ready for our arrival.
Ryder: All good here. Gate’s opening.
We pull up to the eight-foot gates swung open to welcome us in. I watch Elise from the corner of my eye as we drive through them. It’s the first time she’s seen the outside of the base.
She takes in the scenery with wide eyes, and I suppose this would be quite a shock to someone who has never seen more than a few rooms of the entire facility. I take this as a good sign.
I want her to see this place through fresh eyes.
“It’s… beautiful,” she says, evidently surprised.
She’s not wrong. The Spanish-style architecture mixed with the modern security measures makes the place look more like a castle than the fortress it is.
“Just wait until you get a tour of the inside. You’ve only seen a fraction of this place.”
Ryder, Donovan, Kade, and Alec—who sports a thickly casted leg and a crutch under each arm—wait at the main entrance for us, a sight that seems to calm Elise even more. I hoped the familiar faces would have that effect.
I throw the car in park and walk to open the door on Elise’s side. She takes my hand, holding tight even after she’s out of the car.
The guys form a perimeter around us as we walk inside, and I’m pleased to see that they’ve followed my instructions down to the letter.
Every soldier in the building, not currently on security, lines the hallways. They stand at attention as we walk past and do a good job maintaining their composure, though I’m sure it’s strange for them to see their leader holding the hand of a girl he took as a hostage only weeks ago.
Hell, I’m still getting used to it.
The overwhelming number of men here has Elise squeezing my hand almost to the point of pain, but this is necessary.
My soldiers need to see that I’m serious about this, about her.
I won’t let rumors spread through the base and have anyone question the validity of my affections.
I want every one of them to see that this is real.
Elise is mine.
Surprised or not, the only emotion visible on any of their faces is fear. Good.
They’ve all seen firsthand what happens if they step out of line, so I’m confident they won’t.
I’m brought out of my thoughts when Elise suddenly stops walking. One glance, and I know what’s going on—this isn’t the first time this has happened.
Ryder and the others halt, and I take Elise’s hands in mine, drawing her attention away from the soldiers.
“You okay, Princess?”
She looks up like she’s just broken out of a spell, and I doubt she realized she’d stopped walking until now.
“I know this is overwhelming after—”
“I’m okay,” she whispers. “It’s just weird being back here, that’s all.”
Instead of reassuring her with my words, I pull her to me and place a possessive kiss on her lips. The action does exactly what I hoped, and she relaxes in my arms.