Chapter 45
Wes
We spend the morning and early afternoon of the next day in the hotel room, since Elli has to get some work done.
She stops working at three so she can get ready to go, stating she can’t show up to her parents’ house in booty shorts and a tank top.
I think she looks hot as fuck, but I also see where she’s coming from.
She changes into some denim overalls with a cropped black t-shirt underneath, so the sides of her belly show when she raises her arms. Her hair is down in waves from the braid she’s had it in all night, and she slips on some flip flops.
God, she’s so pretty.
I’m in some gray chino shorts and a plain black t-shirt. I slip on my Vans and then we’re headed out to what I’m sure will be an interesting dinner.
When we get there, Louise is bustling around the kitchen while Kent sits in the recliner, typing away on his laptop.
The twins' shouts can be heard from their rooms and it sounds like they’re playing some type of video game.
Izzy and Spencer are nowhere to be found, but I’m sure they’ll make an appearance eventually.
“Hi dad.” Elli says as she walks past her dad, and Kent looks up from his laptop and gives her a wave.
“Hey mom, how can I help?” Elli asks from the opposite side of the island.
“Oh no need to help. I’ve been doing it all by myself all day. No need to inconvenience anyone now.” Louise grumbles as she chops lettuce and puts it into a bowl.
“If you insist. I’m going to give Wes a tour of the house since we didn’t get to yesterday.”
“Fine. Dinner will be ready in fifteen minutes.” She looks directly at me, “No funny business under my roof.”
“Yes, ma’am.” I agree. But I’m tempted to pull Elli into the bathroom and finger fuck her just to spite her mother.
“This is obviously the kitchen and the family room. You saw the garage.”
I noticed how stark white and clean everything was yesterday, but with so many bodies in here, it brought life to the space.
Now, I look around and see there’s one family picture hanging above the couch on one wall, a picture of Jesus and a picture of a temple on another, and then the TV.
It looks like a museum almost with how white the walls are.
Elli leads me to the stairwell and points down the short hallway. “Down there is my parents’ room, my dad’s office, and a bathroom.”
We head up the stairs, and at the top we come across three doors. I know the far right one leads to Izzy’s room, and the door is currently closed so Izzy must be in there. The door next to that one is dark, and the door on the far left is where the sounds of the twins talking is coming from.
“Izzy’s room, Spencer’s, and the twins’ room.” Elli points to each door. “The bathroom is down around that corner.”
“Wait, you all share a bathroom?”
“Unfortunately. Why do you think all of Izzy’s beauty products are piled on her desk?
She doesn’t trust the twins not to mess around with them, and there’s no way she’d be quick enough for everyone to use the bathroom in the morning.
I used to get ready in my room too, because there’s no way I was going to get in trouble for not sharing. ”
“That makes sense. Why didn’t anyone use the bathroom downstairs?”
“That’s only for guests.” Izzy answers, coming out of her room.
“So, no one else can use it? Why not just clean it before guests come and use it in the meantime?” I ask.
Izzy shrugs. “Mom doesn’t want to be embarrassed by having a dirty bathroom, or dirty house for that matter. So she made it off limits.”
Weird. But okay.
“Can you come help me pick a first day of school outfit, Els?” Izzy asks.
Elli agrees and we make our way to the bedroom. I wait in the doorway again, not wanting to intrude on the space. I turn around and look at the hallway and think about how different this place is compared to my childhood apartment.
Elli’s childhood home is clean and spacious. Although it does seem more clinical than warm and inviting, it feels safer than where I was raised.
I don’t remember much about where I lived before I was nine, but the apartments I was in from ages nine to thirteen were always dirty and run down. The wallpaper would be peeling and it would smell like cigarettes no matter how much we tried to air them out.
Elli’s mom probably always has food in the pantry and fridge and cooks homemade meals, where mine would usually get me a happy meal or something off the dollar menu, or would microwave a frozen TV dinner.
My mom tried her best, until Keith got her back on drugs. I don’t ever remember having an actual bed frame, but I had a clean mattress on the floor and that was good enough for me. When Keith would get mad, he would take away the sheets and blankets from my bed and make me sleep without them.
My clothes always smelled like they needed to be washed because I didn’t have a dresser, just a laundry basket to keep them in. Keith wasn’t supposed to smoke in the apartment, but he would anyway.
Elli grew up in a palace compared to me, and it makes me wonder how I can give her a future she deserves.
“Hey,” Elli says quietly, pulling me from my wandering thoughts. “Where did you go just now?”
“Oh, just thinking about how differently we grew up. You were raised in the equivalent of a palace compared to my living situations. It’s just interesting, you know?” I shrug.
Elli goes to reply, but her mom shouts that dinner is ready. Elli gives me an apologetic look and a kiss on the cheek. “Let’s go eat. We’ll talk about this later, okay?”
I nod, and walk down the stairs and to the dining area, where Kent is seated at the head of the table.
Spencer is to Kent’s right, the twins next to him, Izzy is opposite Spencer, and she motions for me to take the middle seat next to her, and Elli takes the next seat, leaving the other end of the table open for Louise.
Louise sets down a ceramic dish of steaming mashed potatoes and takes her seat, and then everyone bows their head and Kent says a prayer.
They pass each dish to the right, starting with Kent and working around the table so Izzy is the last to get food.
“This looks really great, Mrs. Monson.” I say looking at the spread of some type of thin, fried chicken, potatoes, gravy, green beans, a salad, and rolls.
“Thank you. It’s a German dish, schnitzel.” She says curtly.
We dish our food and eat it in relative silence, which is hard for me because usually family dinners with Jess and Luke or my friends are loud and full of chatter and laughter.
Izzy, bless her sweet, chattery soul, fills the awkward silence by giving us a plot summary of the musical she’s in this year.
I’ve never heard of The Drowsy Chaperone, but it sounds like an interesting musical.
I guess Izzy isn’t a lead in this one, but she’s a crucial background character who gets to dance a lot, which she seems happy with.
The conversation shifts to Spencer leaving, and he grunts one word answers at Elli every time she asks him something.
I watch her try to physically shrink every time she speaks, and I hate it.
She’s nothing like the confident woman I’ve seen her blossom into over these last few months, and it’s making me want to flip this fucking table.
“Elli, Kent, come with me to the garage for dessert.” Louise says curtly with a pointed look at her husband.
Elli gives my thigh a squeeze under the table, along with a small, sad smile, but obediently rises and follows her parents to the garage.
“So, Wes, are you excited for your tour?” Izzy asks, turning her attention to me.
“Yeah, I’m really excited. I’m hoping to get a record deal out of it.”
“You’re going on tour? Like as a rockstar?” Gideon asks, looking a little dumbfounded. This is the first time he’s spoken since I’ve been here.
I chuckle, “Kind of. I don’t play rock music, though.”
“That’s cool!” Gideon says, nudging Issac who nods his head in agreement.
Spencer scoffs and rolls his eyes, pushing his green beans around his plate.
I choose to ignore that.
“Elli must be excited to finally get to travel. I know she’s been wanting to see a bunch of different places.” Izzy interjects.
“Yeah, she seems excited. I’m glad she’s able to come with me. I just hope she doesn’t get sick of me since we’ll be sharing a space for eight months.”
Izzy beams, “I can guarantee she won’t be sick of you.”
“Thanks, Iz.” I playfully ruffle her hair and she glares at me, but it holds no weight so we both just burst out laughing.
Spencer scoffs, again, and I look over to see him giving me a look so cold I’m surprised I’m not frozen.
“Would you like to say something, Spencer?” I ask calmly. I don’t want to have to fight Elli’s brother today.
“Elli’s lost her mind, is all. She’s not living her life the way we were taught. Going on a tour, sharing a bed with a man who’s not her husband? That’s a one way ticket to the Telestial Kingdom.”
“Spencer.” Izzy warns, but I place a hand on her shoulder to convey that I’ve got this.
“It’s okay Izzy. Let him get it out so it’s not eating away at him.”
Spencer sits up straighter, like he’s preparing for a battle.
“I just think,” he starts, “that Elli’s going through a rebellious phase.
I think she saw you with your demonic tattoos and facial piercings and thought ‘Wow, he’d really make my parents mad.
I should date him. Get it out of my system.
’ but eventually she’s going to want to come back.
She’s going to realize how empty her life is without the church and she’s going to dump you because you can’t give her what she needs.
You can’t give her an eternal family and eternal salvation.
The sooner she realizes that, the sooner she realizes you aren’t good enough, the better.
She needs stability. She needs a real man who will provide for her and take care of her.
A musician can’t give her that. You cannot give her that. ”
My heart is pounding so hard in my chest it feels like it’s going to beat directly out of me. How the fuck does this nineteen year old know exactly what buttons to push? How does he know every single one of my insecurities?
“I think you’re wrong.” I say, my voice coming out much stronger than I feel. “And Elli’s an adult who can make her own decisions. Now, if you’ll excuse me, I think I’ll go see if they need any help with the dessert.”
I stand, and Izzy gives me a half-hearted smile that makes me feel a bit better because at least I know she’s on mine and Elli’s side.
Fuck what Spencer thinks. He’s so caught up in the religious bullshit that’s been fed to him that he can’t see that his sister is happier now than she probably ever was living here.
I go to open the garage door, and realize it’s cracked a bit. I can hear hushed, but harsh voices coming from inside.
“...not going to provide for you! He’s not good enough, Elli.
He’s a delinquent. Probably a drug user.
What’s stopping him from leaving you for the next best thing when he goes on tour?
Packer did that. What’s stopping Wes? He’ll just break your heart.
” Louise’s voice rings out clearly through the garage.
“I love him, Mom. I’m not going to sit here and listen to you-” Elli starts, but she’s cut off by her mother.
“What you’re feeling is lust, not love! We raised you to make good choices. Going on tour with a-uh-uh junkie sinner like him isn’t a good choice. Stop thinking with your body and start thinking with your brain.”
I rear back as if I’ve been smacked, the word “junkie” triggering my fight or flight response. I’d heard it all my life from Keith. From the kids at school. From other adults who didn’t even know me.
Your whore mother is nothing but a useless junkie.
The junkie’s kid.
You’ll grow up to be a junkie loser just like your useless mom.
I’m so lost in my thoughts I only catch the tail end of what Elli says.
“...you’re right. But I get to make my own decisions.”
“If you don’t end things with that boy, you’ll no longer be welcome in this family. I think it’s best if you leave. I don’t even recognize you anymore.” Louise spits.
I take that as my queue to walk away so they don’t know I’m eavesdropping. I rush to the bathroom down the hall and lock myself inside, willing the tears threatening to spill to stay in.
What if they’re right? What if Elli is just going through a rebellious phase? What if I’m not good enough for her? I can’t give her a big house with a yard. I know she says she doesn’t want kids, but what if she’s only saying that because she doesn’t want them with me?
I’m the one that convinced her to take a step away from the religion she grew up in. I’m the one who’s convinced her to “sin” and try the things she never would have in the first place.
Maybe I am all wrong for her.