Chapter 18
CHAPTER EIGHTEEN
QUINN
Puppies are so freaking cute.
But you know what I like best about this particular puppy? It’s the way Miles is holding him cradled on his back in one arm while he sips a beer with the other.
He’s all man, but Shadow is so tiny that the whole image is screaming, I know how to be gentle.
Now, that is tempting.
Which is all kinds of messed up because … because … we had our chance to be a couple and we struggled with it. Now we are breaking up, and if I’m a smart woman, I’ll get any and all thoughts of Miles as anything more than what we are out of my head.
It wouldn't work.
We both know it.
We made things complicated, and even though we are trying to fix the mess we made, it's just smart if I don’t add fuel to the fire.
Even though just being around him today has been enlightening .
Miles knows how to relax, and it's a good look for him.
Too good.
I can picture myself spending too much time with this version of Miles.
“How’s it going over here?” Sadie asks as she sits on the porch swing next to me.
To say I was blown away that Miles was having his family over for dinner was an understatement. We got back to town early, and I was convinced that he’d head to the garage straight away. He’d ditched work—also mind-blowing—to get this puppy, and I could have sworn he was itching to get back to work in the shop, but no, he wanted to go get all the things for Shadow and then plan dinner for his family.
Now, he's laughing with his brothers, Ruby, Max, and his dad over a game of cornhole.
Dinner with his family, games, beers, and his dog. This life looks good on him.
“I’m just admiring this view while I still can,” I say honestly. It’s nice to have someone who knows the truth.
“The view as in the lake and mountains or my soon-to-be brother-in-law?”
She’s got a knowing look in her eyes as she waits for my answer. But I don't say anything. She bumps my shoulder with hers.
“It sneaks up on you, doesn’t it?”
“I don’t know what you’re talking about.”
She sighs. “You can deny it all you want, but as someone who knows from personal experience, once you fall for an Asher, that’s it. You won't come back from it.”
“I didn’t fall for Miles,” I correct her quickly, but there’s a good chance I’m saying this for my benefit and not just hers. If I keep repeating it, maybe my brain can understand why we wouldn't work. The list is long. Friends are all we should be. “In fact, we are breaking up next weekend.”
“What?” Sadie says so loudly and with so much shock that the men in the yard stop their conversation to look at us.
Hudson takes a step this way, but Sadie holds her hand up. My eyes connect with Miles’s. His gaze narrows as if he’s trying to figure me out, so I look away quickly. But I still feel his eyes on me. When I glance once more, I'm not surprised that he’s still watching me.
“That does not look like the face of a man who plans to break up next weekend.”
I nod and then sip the wine she brought over.
“It just makes sense that we end things now. We’ve seen Cherry around town with Danny, so we’re pretty sure she’s distracted. Plus, I’m sure Miles wants his bedroom back, not to mention his life. One that isn’t full of lies.”
“I don’t know,” Sadie says with a grin. “The Miles I'm seeing tonight is pretty good. I haven’t seen him this laid-back since Hudson and I got together. He’s always very grumpy.”
“So grumpy,” I say with a laugh. “And he gets this little wrinkle between his eyes when he looks at you. Like it actually hurts him to be standing there having a conversation with another person.”
“Mmm,” Sadie hums. “That might just be when he’s talking to you.”
I roll my eyes. “Sadie, if Miles and I get any sort of relationship out of this summer, it’ll be friendship.”
She holds her hands up. “Fine. Fine. I’ll drop it, but just know, it’s okay if you pick a different path with him.”
I toss back the last of my drink, like a woman taking a shot, not a woman who should be sipping wine.
“I’m going to get a refill. Do you want one? ”
“Yes, please.”
I take her glass and then head inside.
I grab the bottle we’d opened, but it’s empty, so I start opening cabinets to see if Miles has more.
The polite thing would be to ask where it's at, but that would mean he’d have to come in here, and that would put us alone in a room, and right now, I don't think that’s?—”
“Looking for something?”
I startle at the sound of Mile’s voice.
Damn. He made it inside anyway.
“Just another bottle of wine. I’m not feeling the beer tonight.”
He nods and goes to a cabinet I hadn’t reached yet. He grabs a bottle of something red and opens it for me.
“What were you and Sadie talking about?” he asks as he refills both our glasses.
I cross my arms and look down. “I told her we are planning the breaking up.”
“You did? What did she say?”
I shake my head. “Nothing.”
“Are you lying to me?”
I shake my head again, but this time, it feels like it’s in slow motion.
“So, she didn’t tell you she thought it was silly because she and Hudson think we aren’t faking it anymore?”
I toss my head back with a laugh.
“You told Hudson?”
He shrugs. “I thought it might help to have a backup if needed.”
I blow out a breath. “Yeah, Sadie said something along those lines.”
I expect him to ask me what I think about their assumptions, but he doesn't .
And I’m glad.
What would I even say?
If I told him I agreed, would we still break up?
See, this is exactly why you do not fake date anyone. It becomes complicated really fast, and now I can't even think straight.
Before I can say anything stupid, I reach for one of the brownies he picked up from B’s Bakery earlier.
“Are these your favorite? I noticed you had them last week, too.”
He nods.
“You could just bake your own.”
“It’s not the same.”
“Why not?”
He sighs and then leans on the counter. “Grabbing brownies or another treat from B’s was a thing my mom and I used to do together. Anytime I accomplished something I’d been wanting; I got a treat.”
“And today, you accomplished getting a puppy.”
“I did.”
I hold the brownie out for him, and he splits it in two.
As he takes a bite, I ask, “And what did you accomplish last week?”
He finishes chewing, swallows, and grabs his beer, heading for the door.
I don't think he’s going to answer me, but he stops and looks over his shoulder.
“Those were because I finally found a reason to get to know the mysterious Quinn Banks. The cookies in the cupboard to your left are because I finally kissed you.”
And then he walks right out the door, leaving me stunned.
He glances back once with a smile.
Then he winks .
Oh, no.
Oh, no, no, no.
I fell for my fake boyfriend.
As soon as everyone left, I tried to clean the kitchen as quickly as I could. Sadie and I drank another bottle between just the two of us, and that alone wasn’t smart.
Alcohol mixed with whatever I’m feeling for Miles isn’t a good pairing. Well, they’re actually a fantastic pair and could be a lot of fun, but I’m trying to be an adult here.
I should be focusing on where I’m headed next on an airplane or at least sending emails so I can start planning. Not letting thoughts of Miles crowd my brain at all times of the day.
Seriously.
How does one even function when they acquire feelings for someone? How long does the fascination last?
“Oh, you already cleaned,” Miles says from the doorway to the kitchen.
I’m just closing the dishwasher.
“I still need to wipe the counters down, but yep, almost done.”
“I’ll finish. I really didn’t think you were going to do all of this. I wouldn’t have walked my dad back if I knew you were here cleaning alone.”
“It’s fine. Really.”
I reach for the cleaning supplies at the same time as Miles.
Our hands touch and we both jump back as if we burned each other. Then our gazes collide, and we both break out in laughter.
“Why are we like this?” he asks.
“I don’t know. ”
His face turns serious. “I do. I don’t know why I even asked. Because I’m trying to convince myself otherwise, I guess.”
I take a breath but don’t respond.
“Maybe if we just—” he starts.
“Gave in?—”
“One more time?—”
“Then we can get over this tension?—”
“And go back to being us.”
I hear him and I’m right there with him, but it doesn’t match what he said yesterday. One day can’t change that, can it?
“You said you didn’t want to complicate things,” I say, my head tilting back as he steps closer.
He groans into my ear. “I know.”
“I’m starting to think you don’t know what complicated means, Miles.”
His hand brushes my hip as he backs me up to the kitchen island.
“I’m aware of what it means, Quinn. But when it comes to you, I don’t care anymore.”
His lips press gently to the spot right under my ear, and I have to take a deep breath. My brain can’t put together coherent sentences when he does this. When he’s this close. When the smell of him overwhelms me and makes me want things I shouldn’t want.
This will indeed complicate things.
We both know it, and yet we can’t seem to stop.
Still, I have to at least try, right?
“So, we should stop, right?” I regret the words as soon as they spill from my lips. I don’t really want to stop. I can only hope he doesn’t want too either.
Miles leans back, a sly grin taking over his lips.
“Is that what you want?”
Our eyes lock, and I inhale .
“No.”
“Good.”
His hands cup my face, and he crashes his lips to mine. Bliss rushes through my veins once again, warming every inch of my body and causing my heart to race.
The rush of his kiss is nothing I’ve ever felt before, and now that he’s done it a second time, I’m not sure I can ever go back.
He breaks this kiss only to give me more on my jaw, my neck, down to my chest. One of his hands slides over my nipple and pops the top button of my shirt, giving his mouth access to kiss and lick his way down the valley between my breasts. His hands smooth over my shorts and down my butt until his fingers reach the end of the fabric. His hand curls, tugging at my shorts.
“Oh, god,” I whimper.
Why does his touch feel like I’m on a high?
It’s hard to make connections with people when you aren’t sticking around, but this, with Miles—it’s different.
Even though we never spent time getting to know one another, I know him, and he knows me. The tension between us was bound to snap, even more so after that night in my room.
Add in the fact we decided to play fake boyfriend and girlfriend and I’d be lying if it weren’t in the back of my mind somewhere that this is where we would end up again.
But right here in the kitchen, I can confidently say I didn’t imagine this.
Since the buttons on my shirt don’t go all the way down, he moves his hands from my hips to my stomach, slipping them under my shirt.
Then he rips it over my head.
“Fuck, that’s so much better.”
Miles reaches down to grip behind my thighs, picking me up as if I weigh absolutely nothing, and sets me on top of the island. Each hand grips a knee as he kisses me hard .
He spreads my legs and stands between them.
Fuck, that was hot. I like that. I like it a lot.
And yet, I’d like it a whole lot of more if he weren’t wearing pants either.
“Lift your butt,” he breathes into my ear, and I don’t have to think twice. I do as I'm told, and he grins, pulling off my underwear.
“Ohhh, god, are we really doing this again?” I ask. It comes out all breathy and wanting and the hungry look in his eye tells me he knows me all too well.
“If by this you mean I’m about to bury my face between your legs until you come all over my tongue and lose all ability to control yourself, yes, we are doing this.”
The thump of my heart picks up with every word that leaves his mouth. I want all of that. Consequences be damned and he knows it.
“Now,” he says and sits at one of the island chairs, his face lined up with where my butt sits on the edge. “Put your legs on my shoulders and show me your beautiful pussy. I’ve missed it and have been waiting to see her again.”
I want to argue. I want to tell him that even though I told him I liked to be bossed around, it doesn’t always mean he’s going to get his way, but right now I don’t do any of that. I want my way, and my way says to take the orgasm I know he’s about to give me and save the arguing for later.
I do as he’s instructed and watch as he takes me in.
His tongue slips from his mouth to lick his lips, and the small gesture makes me moan.
The throaty sound is like a signal to lose all control, because he grips my thighs, jerks me closer, and buries his face between my legs.
“Oh, shit, yes,” I call out, dropping from my hands to my forearms. The movement raises my hips just slightly, but that doesn’t stop Miles.
Nope.
He continues to feast as if someone were timing him, sending him racing for the finish line.
“Miles,” I cry out when his pace only increases. I balance on one arm so that I can slide my fingers through his hair. My head tilts back with another moan.
“Oh, this feels so good,” I say.
“Enjoy it, baby, because once I’m inside of you, nothing is going to feel as hypnotizing as the way my cock is going to stretch and fill you.”
His words send a shiver through my body.
I want that, too.
So, so badly.
His mouth is back on me in record time, but this time, he slides a finger in, joining his tongue. Then two, then three.
“Ahh,” I say as he fingers and licks me with crazed passion. “It's too much. It’s … it's … it’s …”
I suck in a breath as the tingle of my orgasm rips through my body.
“Fuck yeah, baby, I can feel you pulsing on my fingers, and I love it.”
His face dives back in, his tongue taking over for his hand, and I ride out the wave of pure bliss.
When I finally catch my breath, Miles is standing by the island, shaking out my shorts and handing me my underwear.
“I have to be honest with you, Quinn. I’ve seen you touch yourself, come on my face, and I’ve seen you with your lips wrapped around my dick. I just can’t decide what I like most.”
And then he kisses my lips, biting my bottom one as he pulls back .
I lock my legs around his waist and pull him toward me with my heels so that I can deepen the kiss.
With a hand on each of my hips, he squeezes and then glides them up to my chin. He tilts my head back so that he can lick and press his lips to my neck.
“I need to take you upstairs so that I can see what you look like with my cock inside you. After that, maybe I can decide.”
“Yes,” I moan. I want that, too.
My pleading response might be enough, but just to be sure, I hollow out my stomach to make room for my hand. I then unbuckle his pants and slide my hands inside his boxers.
He’s hard, and when I push his pants down, his erection springs free, begging to be taken care of.
Miles scoots me off the counter, holding me with my legs wrapped tight around him as he moves for the stairs.
“As much as I’d love to fuck you in my kitchen, I’m not letting that be the first place I take you. Nor the second or the third.”
His words turn me on all over again. Whatever this man has planned for me, I’m into it.
I grab his erection again and begin to stroke him.
He slams me to the wall at the base of the stairs and kisses me hard. “Someone’s impatient.”
“It’s hard not to be when this is what I have to look forward to.”
He groans, my hand never slowing its strokes.
“How am I supposed to go upstairs while you do that? Fuck, it feels good.”
I lean forward, biting his ear. “Just think of how reaching the top means you get to lay me on your bed and sink your—ah!” I squeal as he races up the stairs. I’m still in his arms, but he moves as if I weigh nothing .
He’s down the hall, in his room, and tossing me onto the bed in seconds.
“Remove the rest of your clothes and open your legs.”
God, this man and his orders.
I do as I’m told and watch as his hungry eyes take me in. He loves when I listen, and I love the reward I get when I do.
He pulls his shirt over his head, and I sigh at the sight of him. How did I let this man get by me so many times?
Then he strips his jeans and briefs off, standing in front of me completely naked with his hard-on in his hand.
The first time with someone is usually nerve racking and can make someone a little shy, but with Miles, it’s not like that at all.
His eyes roam over my body like I’m a treat he can’t wait to sink his teeth into. He smiles at me, and I’ve never felt safer.
“I’m confident both of us are clean and that neither of us have been with anyone in a while, but we should still use a condom,” he says.
His honesty makes me melt inside.
“Okay” is all I say. I feel the same way he does.
He moves to the bedside dresser and pulls out a single gold foil packet. He tears it open and quickly slides it on.
When he crawls into bed with me, I kiss him instantly.
I’ve never felt more beautiful or more confident than I do in these moments with Miles.
His lips move to my cheek, to my jaw, then to my chest, where his mouth captures one nipple and sucks. He slides a finger inside me at the same time.
“Oh. I like that,” I whisper in his ear.
“If that pleases you, then you’re really going to like this.”
He rolls until he’s on top of me, his hips spreading me wide as he places himself at my entrance, rubbing his head against me.
“Fuck, I love how wet you are for me.”
“I love how wet you make me,” I say, and he chuckles .
“You just have to have the last word, don’t you?”
“Do you expect anything less?”
“No,” he says and pushes his head in.
“Shit, I don’t think?—”
“Breathe, Quinn. You were made for me; I know you were. Just look me in the eyes and take a deep breath.”
He pushes fully inside me.
I hiss, but the pain of fitting for him fades quickly.
“Yes, baby, I knew you could take it.”
“Oh, wow. You’re... this feels so good.”
Slowly, he starts to pull out, only to push back in. He goes slow and steady until I’m completely adjusted. When I lift my hips to meet him, his speed increases.
“You’re so tight. It’s amazing.”
I’m too deep in a trance to reply. He brings his knees up to my butt as he pushes my legs open wider so that he can watch himself disappear inside me.
I’ve never been with a person who not only made sure I was satisfied but who had enough control to slow down to watch what we were doing. To really take the act itself in and enjoy it.
“Sit up,” he says. “Look.”
I see how big he is, and my orgasm erupts instantly.
“Oh yesssss,” I cry out.
With a hand on my shoulder, Miles holds me in place as he slams into me over and over, elongating the length of my orgasm.
“Oh, good god,” he groans as he comes right behind me.
He pulses into me twice as he rides it out and then he holds me. He kisses my shoulder and my cheek and my lips.
“I think I went blind for a moment.”
“Good,” I say, and he chuckles.
He stands and disposes of the condom, walking right back into bed naked .
“I’m not sleeping on the couch tonight,” he says as a matter of fact.
“I was hoping you would say that.”
And then he rolls to his side, wrapping an arm around me and pulling me close.
I expect to fall asleep and sleep harder than I have in months, but after about ten minutes, Miles makes it known that he has other plans.
And I’m okay with it, because right now, nothing else matters.