Chapter 20
Chapter
Twenty
MERRI
“Come on, Merri. Mind over matter. You’re strong. You don’t need to feed every single day.”
My pep talk might have been more helpful if not for the yawning chasm of ache in my core. Hunger pangs are a strange thing for a succubus: half cramp, half maddening arousal.
“The world is literally on the verge of ending, you hussy. You can keep it in your pants for a day to focus on other things.”
Andi’s voice echoed in my mind, “If it were me and the world was ending, I’d be riding as many dicks as possible. Go out with a literal bang, girl.”
My chest tightened at the thought of my friend. Where was she? Was she even alive? I had no way to know, and there was absolutely nothing I could do about it. Guilt rushed through me. This was the first time she’d crossed my mind in . . . I wasn’t sure how long.
Fuck, I was a horrible person. I didn’t deserve to even consider myself her bestie. What kind of friend was I?
I’m sure there was something about the whole impossibility of finding or talking to her with the grid being down that I could have used to comfort myself, but self-flagellation was a much better distraction for my hunger. It was immediate and powerful, suffering in silence.
Three of my mates were nearby. I could grab any one of them and tell them I needed to feed, and they’d happily provide.
But that would mean I wasn’t strong enough to function without.
I hated the idea that I couldn’t exist or be of use without feeding on someone.
It was such a massive vulnerability, especially now.
We could go to war at any moment, and if I wasn’t topped up, I could be the chink in our metaphorical armor that would give our enemies the edge they needed. Ugh.
I needed some fresh scenery, if not fresh air.
Honestly, outside would be ideal if it weren’t for the risk of hordes of creatures, Princes of hell, and .
. . you know, imminent death. Striding down the hallway that led into the main common room, I found it filled with people.
That was a huge mistake. The air was thick with pheromones from bonded mates.
Sunday was seated in Thorne’s lap as he ran his fingers up and down her back.
Caleb was nearby, watching the scene while pretending to read a book.
Dahlia offered me a little wave from where she was scribbling in a notebook, her pirate sitting on the floor working on a puzzle with a frustrated expression on his face.
I snickered when I realized the picture was from a cartoon version of Peter Pan.
“Why do they always dress me in tights?” he grumbled.
“Because you have excellent calves,” Dahlia murmured, as if she’d said the same thing thousands of times before.
Caspian resettled himself, now with a smug smile playing about his lips. “Heh. If only Tor were around to hear that I have superior stems.”
Dahlia's gaze found mine, and she gave me a little roll of her eyes to show what she thought of his assessment, but then shrugged as if to say, “What can you do?”
Caspian removed his focus from the puzzle and ran his hand up Dahlia’s leg. The pulse of lust was undeniable.
Crap. Time to go.
I bolted out of there like a rocket had just launched out of my ass. Or maybe everyone would just assume I really had to pee. Honestly, either was a preferable explanation to the truth. I was a horny disaster.
Dammit.
Rushing down another hallway, I kept going, passing doors for other suites, meeting rooms, the kitchens, but there was always someone around. At this point, I was a liability to anyone near me.
And that was when I came across the gym.
The gym filled with sweaty, half-naked warriors. Mine included.
Fuck. Me.
No, seriously. Please.
I stood helpless to do anything but watch as Chaos squared off with the aforementioned Tor, the two men circling each other before launching into a series of blows so perfectly executed I think I swooned.
What was it about two hot, muscular men fighting by choice?
My ovaries gave a throb, and if I wasn’t already pregnant, I would have ovulated on the spot. I was sure of it.
Alek and Kai were at the weight bench, the Viking spotting the fae as he lifted a barbell with so much weight I feared it would snap.
Part of me wondered why these supernatural beings even needed a gym.
They were genetically predisposed to be warriors.
They’d be this strong with or without exercise.
But then Chaos slammed Tor to the mat, and a shockwave of his power released through the room.
Ah. Now I understood. This was a release for them.
For War and the Berserkers, at least. I wasn’t sure about Kai.
But those three weren’t here to get stronger; they were here for the same reason I needed to feed.
If they couldn’t release the violence building within them, they’d snap.
Just like if I didn’t feed, eventually my succubus would take matters into her own hands.
It was a dangerous life we led, simply by existing.
As I moved further into the room, I caught sight of a ripple in the wall to my left.
The space changed from an obstacle course to an archery range.
Rosie and Ben took up their places at the opposite ends of the targets and began taking turns firing arrows.
Rosie nailed it dead center every time, stripping the previous arrow with each shot.
Damn, she was talented. Even as pregnant as she was, the woman would put Robin Hood to shame.
“Red? What’s wrong?” Chaos startled me, pulling my focus from the pair of archers.
He’d abandoned his sparring match and was standing directly in front of me, bare chest glistening with sweat.
I almost moaned as a drop trailed down his pec before running over his defined abs and disappearing into the waistband of his fitted shorts.
Following that little bead of temptation was a massive mistake.
Because now I could see the outline of a very familiar bulge.
Not to mention the thick muscles of his thighs.
I didn’t realize I’d bitten down on one of my knuckles until he was tugging it out of my mouth.
“Red? You okay?”
“Huh?” I snapped my head up, wiping at my chin in case of accidental drool.
His answering smile was amused, though a crinkle of concern still marred his brows.
Question finally registering as my brain caught up, I finally managed to answer, “I’m fine, I was just going for a walk.”
“Okay.”
His simple acceptance felt like a trap.
“What? It’s the truth.”
“I believe you.”
“What do we believe?” Sin asked, walking up from behind Chaos. He was freshly showered, a towel still hanging around his shoulders and his blond hair currently a deep gold.
“That she’s fine. Just going for a walk.”
Sin and Chaos shared a smirk as my incubus came up to my side and dropped a kiss to my forehead. “Glad you’re fine.”
My whole body clenched as a wave of hunger hit me hard.
Sin’s nostrils flared, and his smile turned wicked. “Ooh. I get it.” He reached out like he was going to stroke my cheek, and I slapped his hand away.
“There’s nothing to get.”
“Somebody’s hangry.”
“I said I was f—”
“Fine. Yeah, we heard you, Red.” Chaos stepped closer to me, his presence looming. “But can I let you in on a little secret?”
He took my hand and placed it on his solid chest before moving it down the ridges of his abdomen.
I swallowed. “O-okay.”
“I want to make sure you are better than fine.”
Sin chuckled and started listing off adjectives. “Limp. Euphoric. Love-drunk. Spent. Boneless.” Then he tapped my nose. “Happy.”
My fingers toyed with the top of Chaos’s shorts, dipping just under as I licked my lips. A little yelp from Rosie gave me pause, reminding me we weren’t the only ones here. But as my gaze traveled to them, I watched Ben carry her out with single-minded purpose written all over his face.
The Novasgardians and Kai must’ve also left, but I’d been too preoccupied to notice.
Oopsie daisy.
Chaos dragged my attention back to him with a gentle tug on a long piece of my hair. “Didn’t the others take care of you, baby?”
Sin snickered. “Isn’t it obvious? She came looking for her favorites.”
Chaos offered me one of his rare lopsided grins. “Is that right, Red? Am I your favorite?”
“Hey,” Sin protested, right on cue.
I bit back my own smile and shook my head. “I was feeling restless and just trying to make the time pass faster while we waited for Asshole to get back.”
“Horny,” Sin whispered in my ear, his voice like the most addictive drug as he pressed up close behind me. “You meant horny.”
I shivered, my nipples so hard they could cut glass. “Why would you assume that?”
He let out a dark chuckle. “You cleared the room. Your lust is more potent than mine and Chaos’s combined.”
“Why didn’t you tell any of us you were hungry?” Chaos asked, sliding his palm around the back of my neck.
“He means the others,” Sin corrected, still speaking in my ear. “We didn’t need to do more than look at you to see what you need.”
I had to swallow and take a deep breath to maintain any semblance of focus. The breath was less helpful than one would hope, since it meant I took a big ol' inhale of their pheromones. “I wanted to prove to myself that I could go longer between feedings.”
“Prove it? Why? What does that achieve?” Chaos asked.
“That I’m not a liability. That we’re not going to have to stop in the middle of a fight because the succubus needs to fuck or she dies.”
Sin trailed kisses over my shoulder and up my neck. “Sounds fun. I’m in.”
“Sin, I’m serious.”
“So am I. But you’ve never been a liability. Do you remember when you saved me from those zombie demons at the chateau? You fed from them and killed them all in one fell swoop.”
“That was different.”
“Was it?” he asked absentmindedly, his lips warm and deliciously distracting as he nibbled on my earlobe.