Chapter Nine
The new year is off to an amazing start.
January is a lot of life as usual, but I ultimately land a
role as a series regular on Workin’ for
Laughs. It’s a sketch comedy series celebrating everyday folks doing what
they do best—finding humor in the hustle. Several well-known male stand-up
comics headline the series, and it’s heavy on Southern humor. I’m one of the
few full-time female cast members. It’s a huge deal, and I am so excited about
it. Shooting won’t start for a couple of months, but it’s the sort of thing
I’ve been working toward.
Meanwhile, Christian is gearing up for spring training. With
my new TV role, I can’t go and stay with him for the entire time, so we’ll have
to do the long-distance thing. We sit down with our calendars, but I plan to
fly out to see him as much as I can. The decision comes after a conversation
that really solidified the direction of our relationship.
Christian is getting into baseball-season mode. I already
know how hard he works, and he’s shared everything he puts into his training
with me, but now, he sits me down to fully prepare me
for it.
We’re at his place near the beach, and he’s grilled us some
steaks for dinner. Christian is a grill master, and I’m ready to dig in when he
reaches for my hand.
“Ella Rose, I love you so much, and I still can’t believe
you’re mine.”
Aww…
“In any other situation, I would have been down on one knee
already and putting a ring on your finger.”
“Christian…”
“I need you to understand why I haven’t,” he says somberly.
He gazes at our hands briefly before looking up again. “I have always been
honest with you about my work ethic and how I spend the season.”
I nod, because he has.
“But it’s very important to me that you experience a full
baseball season with me. I need you to get to know me during a
baseball season before we fully commit to each other.”
He’s a little emphatic on that point, but before I can argue
that I already know him and that nothing will surprise me, he goes on.
“My daily routine is very strict. It has to be. You’ve seen
a little of that side of me, but once spring training starts, it’s on a whole
other level.”
“That makes sense, but…”
“An athlete’s life is hard. Being an athlete’s wife is even
harder. So, I need to make sure you know what you’re getting into.”
“Christian, I can handle it. I promise.” I realize I may
sound like I’m really angling for a ring, but that’s not it at all. I want him
to know that I can be patient. I don’t want him putting any unnecessary
pressure on himself.
But he’s still hesitant, like he doesn’t think I’m capable
of understanding. “Okay, here’s the thing. Most people only see the fun and
glamorous side of the game. They think it’s all sitting in the stands and
cheering with the wives and girlfriends and families, then hanging out and
celebrating after. But it’s not. It’s a long season, especially if we make the
playoffs, and sometimes, it will be very lonely for you. Once spring training
starts, all the time we’ve been spending together will be over.”
I don’t want to jump all over that statement because I do
get what he’s telling me. However, I also have a career that isn’t
always conducive to being in a relationship. My time isn’t my own, and it’s
hard to maintain a life outside of filming.
Which is what I tell him. But he’s still frowning.
“Just know…I will always put you first and do everything I
can to set you up for success. In baseball, I put my teammates first, and you
are now my most important teammate.”
Okay…
“We’re a team now. Me and you.” Pausing, I see him swallow
hard. “I’ve never let anyone into my life before. Not like this. There’s no
blueprint. In my heart, I see this season as something that will confirm that
we are meant to be together.”
“But…?”
“But I can’t help but be a little nervous, because this may
not be the life you want. Like I said, it’s not glamorous. Our time together
won’t be what it has been, and—”
I silence his worries with a kiss. When I gently pull back,
I caress his jaw. “I want you, Christian. And baseball is a part of
who you are, so I’m going to want that, too. I get that it won’t be easy, and
there will be some adjustments, but at the end of the day, we get to be
together, so…I’m in.”
Now, he looks hopeful—but not too hopeful.
“Your career is really starting to take off. You have this
new TV show, and everything you’re doing is in Hollywood. Everything will be in
constant motion. Flying back and forth, living out of suitcases, late-night
phone calls, and possibly long stretches of time where we’re apart.” He pauses
for a moment. “All I want is for you to be happy. That’s what means the most to
me. But with all of these…I don’t know…obstacles, I guess I can’t help but
worry a little.”
I’m glad I’m not the only one.
“I think we can both agree that this wasn’t something either
of us planned for. Like, a year ago, I wouldn’t have believed anyone who told
me I’d be in love and dating a Major League Baseball player.”
“And I certainly wouldn’t have believed I’d be dating a
Hollywood actress.”
“We’ve got this,” I assure him. “We’re a team, and we are
going to make this work. I’m up for the challenge if you are.”
That boyish grin finally appears as he nods. “I am. For you,
Ella Rose, I am all-in.”
I’m a pretty awesome and understanding girlfriend, if
I do say so myself.
At least, I think I am.
When it’s time for Christian to leave for spring training,
I’m excited and supportive, and we have a schedule in place for the times I
will be there, and when I can’t. During the baseball season, there’s no time
for him to fly to see me, so if we want to see each other, I have to travel to
him. We are as prepped and prepared as we can be.
Still, I think he’s surprised by how smoothly it’s all
going. I was fine handling my own travel, dealing with routine, his intense
schedule, his eating habits, the rituals he’s imposed on himself, and being
supportive by not trying to take his focus away from his job. I understood all
of it because it is the same for me, and Christian has been that way when I’m
the one filming for different roles. So, it’s not only me doing it. He’s done
it, as well.
Our biggest challenge, honestly, is time. We both want more
of it together, but we’re sacrificing it right now because we each have dreams.
Careers that we have spent our entire lives working toward. And he was right;
it is lonely at times. I miss him like crazy, even though we talk
every night, but I do my best not to let it show. Because as much as we’re
alike in our drive and ambition, I’m an actress. Even when I’m not okay, I can
pretend I am. So, even though I miss him and wish things were different, I
never let him know that because I don’t want him to feel bad or guilty or
anything negative.
I want him to know that I can be a good teammate, even when
my heart’s a little sad. You know, sometimes you’ve got to fake it till you
make it. So, I do.
My first few visits to Phoenix were quick weekend trips.
There weren’t any games, so we had some time to be together.
After he practiced.
My first proper introduction to his world is a team dinner
reception. I’m supposed to meet all the coaches, his teammates, and their wives
or significant others, and I am extremely excited about it. The thought of
finally getting to experience being Christian Lucas’s girlfriend at a team
event is a major step. He was already a plus-one for me at a movie premiere. To
me, this is the baseball equivalent.
The dinner is being held in one of the ballrooms of our
hotel, and as we ride down in the elevator, I grip his hand tightly.
“Are you nervous?” he asks.
“No.” But then I realize that’s a lie. “A little.”
He kisses my hand. “You have nothing to worry about.
Everyone’s going to love you.”
I’m a people person, so I’m not afraid of talking to anyone.
Unfortunately, I’m not very familiar with this world, and I don’t want to do or
say anything to make Christian look bad. This isn’t just about me. I’m here as
his plus-one, his girlfriend, his teammate.
“Just be yourself,” he says gently.
When we step out into the lobby, several of his teammates
are already there with their wives, and we quickly join them. He makes all the
introductions, and my head spins as I try to keep up and remember all the
names.
We walk en masse to the ballroom,
and I relax. I’ve got this.
The night passes in a blur. I lose count of all the people I
meet, but everyone’s interested in my career, who I know, and what movies and
shows I’ve been in.
“Who’s the most famous actor you’ve ever worked with?”
“How many movies have you starred in?”
“Do you get to keep the clothes you wear on TV?”
“Who’s the hottest actor you got to kiss?”
This is typical of any group setting when people meet me for
the first time. So, really, I’m right at home. I exchange phone numbers with
several people, and we plan to see each other when I’m in town next time.
Overall, I would call the night a success.
The following day, the team manager’s wife hosts a luncheon
for just the wives and girlfriends.
I’m a little nervous because I won’t have Christian standing
right beside me. This will be me on my own. I don’t know why I’m nervous.
Everyone was super friendly last night, so why wouldn’t they be today, right?
However, before Christian left for practice this morning, he
sat me down for a little pep talk.
Somehow, it felt a little like a warning.
“Okay, I know you met many of these ladies last night, but
this will be way more one-on-one. You should be friends with everyone, but
close with no one, because players move around and get traded all the time.
Girlfriends come and go, and they don’t really treat you as though you’re here
to stay until you have a ring on your finger or are married. It’s like they
want to make sure you stick around before they let you into the fold.”
“Um, okay. Wow. I guess that makes sense.” I pause, nibbling
my lip. “How do you know all this?”
He chuckles. “I’ve been doing this for a while, and even