Chapter 13
Chapter Thirteen
T essa
I don’t know what’s happening. I have what feels like a thousand butterflies fluttering around in my stomach, and then there’s the ache between my thighs.
Both feelings caused by one Landon Barker.
He’s sitting in his chair, sipping his beer, as if he didn’t just tilt my world on its axis.
He’s not the least bit affected by his confession.
He doesn’t have to sit here with our combined friends and pretend he’s not swooning over a speech I just made, or that he wants to tear my clothes from my body.
He’s lucky all right, because I want to do just that.
It’s wrong. We’re friends. But the way he looks at me… I can’t seem to be able to control it.
“Excuse me,” I say, standing. Our food should arrive soon, and I need a minute. Just a few hundred seconds of time to get myself in check. I need to regroup.
“You okay?” he asks, reaching out for me. His hand lands on my arm, and I have to shift my stance and rub my legs together to dull the ache he’s causing inside me.
“Yeah, just need to run to the restroom.”
“The hallway by the bar. It’s private, just for this section of the bar, so no worries about lines or fans.”
“Like fans are going to worry about little ole me,” I say teasingly, trying to get us back to the fun, flirty banter that I’ve learned to handle and is what I expect between us. Something passes in his eyes, but he doesn’t comment.
“I’ll come with.” Autumn stands, and even though I needed some time to myself, I’m grateful. Maybe she can shed some light on what this is? Maybe I’m just reading too much into all of this.
I don’t wait for her as I make my way down the hall. Pushing open the women’s bathroom door, I’m surprised to find it sparkling clean and sigh in relief as I slump against the sink, trying to catch my breath.
Why am I breathless?
“Whoa,” Autumn says, coming into the bathroom. “What was that?” She fans herself with her hands as if she’s burning up.
“What?” I play dumb, but even I can hear it in my voice that I know exactly what she’s talking about.
“Did you hear him? He called you his Tessa!”
I nod. “Caught that, did you?”
“Mm-hmm.” She grins. “You two looked awfully cozy with whispers over there. What was that about?”
“Autumn, I— I don’t know,” I tell her honestly. Then I recap as much as my jumbled mind can remember of what he told me.
“He’s in love with you.”
“What? That’s absurd. We’ve known each other for a month. He’s not in love with me.”
“He’s falling, then. Hard. I can see it in the way he looks at you. For the record, it’s the same way he’s always looked at you, just more… intense if I had to put a name to it.”
“What am I going to do?”
“I’m not sure what the issue is here, Tessa.”
“He’s this famous athlete, and I’m me. Tessa, who helps run an animal shelter. He can have any woman that he wants, and he has had plenty.”
“Maybe so, but how many has he been reported to have been with since you?”
“None.”
“One,” she says at the same time.
My head whips up. “Who?” Is that jealousy I feel?
“You.” That’s right. Date eight, I think it was.
We picked up takeout and brought it back to his place.
He convinced me he needed help with learning to use his air fryer.
Turns out, he doesn’t even own an air fryer.
Anyway, I ran in to get the food to try and keep the fans at bay, and I was photographed getting into his SUV.
They didn’t get my face, and the media doesn’t know who I am. At least not that we’re aware of.
“Right,” I say when I break out of my memories to find her standing there, staring at me with her hands on her hips.
“What are you afraid of?” Her voice is softer this time.
“He’s going to break my heart.”
“First of all, you don’t know that. Second of all, when this”—she waves her hands wildly in the air—“whatever this is, might not ever end.”
I nod. “But if I let myself fall, it’s going to be so much worse.”
“Oh, Tess.” She comes to me and puts her arms around my shoulder, giving me a side hug.
“You’ve already fallen. You just won’t admit it.
Look at me and my cocky player. He’s famous, and I’m just me, running an animal shelter, and we make it work.
He loves me. I love him. It’s that simple.
It’s not about money or fame or anything else. It’s about the heart.”
I give up on any pretenses to hide it and nod. “I know.”
“See, that wasn’t so hard. Just let it happen.
If it works out, great. If not, you won’t have the what-ifs.
Trust me. I had two years of what-ifs, and that’s not something you want to do.
I had what-ifs and a broken heart. I would have much rather just had one of those.
Take the chance. Go out there and show that player how lucky he is to have your attention and see where it leads you. ”
“Yeah. I mean, I don’t know if I’ll do it tonight, or here for that matter, but yeah. I’m going to do it. Thanks, Autumn.” I give her a hug. “Oh, Landon said he would give me a ride home.”
“Perfect. You don’t have to do it here. Do it in the car or at your place. Invite him in for a drink, or you know, invite him to stay.” She waggles her eyebrows.
“Too soon.” I laugh.
“Is it?” She grabs my hand and tugs me toward the door. “Come on, before they think we ran away.” She leads us back to the table, dropping my hand just as we’re back in sight. I take my seat and try to catch up on the conversation between the men.
Not a minute later, Henry is delivering our food, and I concentrate on that.
These burgers are so damn good. I polish off my food in no time, just eating and listening to the conversations around me.
I chime in where I see fit, all the while my mind is running through tonight.
Do I ask him in? How do I tell him I’m ready for a real date?
One I say yes to for no other reason than to just spend time with him.
The next hour passes in a blur for me. In my head, I’m deciphering every look, every touch, every moment we’ve shared.
I take part as I can, trying to act as though my head isn’t spinning and my heart isn’t racing.
To be honest, day one, I wanted him. I just wouldn’t allow myself to voice it.
I was so afraid of being just another notch in his belt that I held him at arm’s length, and my arms are tired.
I can’t hold him back anymore, and I don’t want to.
Autumn is right. I would rather have a broken heart than what-ifs.
Who knows, maybe some of his luck will rub off on me and the broken heart will never happen. Either way, I’m tired of pretending.
“Tessa,” Corey says, getting my attention.
“Sorry,” I say sheepishly.
“What do you think? You in?”
“Uh, sure,” I say, realizing that everyone’s attention is on me. I’m sure it’s whatever plans they have after we leave here. Corey grins and nods like I just gave him a million dollars.
“Right, well, we’re headed out. We have to pick up JJ.” Autumn stands from the table. “Tess, you need a ride home?” She looks from me to Corey and then over to Landon.
“No, thanks. Landon said he would give me a ride.” We just talked about this, so I don’t know why she’s asking.
“I can take you home,” Corey pipes up from beside me.
“That’s sweet, but Landon can take me.” I turn to look at Landon, and his jaw is clenched. “Unless you have something else going on?” I ask him.
“No. You’re coming with me.”
Well, all right, then. “Thanks anyway,” I tell Corey.
He looks disappointed but doesn’t comment otherwise.
Corey and Case decide to stay for another round, so we say our goodbyes and head out.
Landon is quiet, giving all new meaning to the strong, silent type.
His body is still as he walks beside me with his hand on the small of my back.
He opens the passenger door of his SUV for me and waits until I’m strapped in to shut the door.
I watch him as he jogs around the front of the SUV and slides in behind the wheel.
His hands grip the wheel but he makes no move to start the car.
“Landon?”
He turns to look at me, his cerulean blue eyes dark with an emotion I can’t name. “Don’t go.”
“Don’t go where?” I ask, confused.
His jaw clenches. “Don’t go out with Corey.”
“What are you talking about?”
“Corey,” he says through gritted teeth. “You agreed to have dinner with him tomorrow night. You’re not going.”
My hackles rise. “The hell I’m not.” I don’t know why I say it. I have no interest in going anywhere with Corey. But I’ll be damned if he thinks he can boss me around.
“I mean it, Tessa. You’re not going. Call him and tell him no.”
“You’re being crazy. You can’t tell me what to do.” I’m seething now, and for no reason really. I’m overreacting, but so is he. I also know that if I just came out and told him he’s the one I want, this wouldn’t be happening. At least, I don’t think it would be.
“That’s because I am crazy!” he yells and then goes silent. He’s breathing heavily, and when he speaks again, his tone is softer, yet still firm. “I’m fucking crazy about you, Tessa. You’re mine. My girl, not his, and I can’t stand the thought of you going out with him.”
I sit here in the passenger seat, my heart aflutter because he said the words. Not just in jest but with sincerity, and I know there is no way I can resist him. Hell, at this point, I don’t even want to. I just want him.
“Okay.”
“Please, I—” He stops as my acceptance registers with him. “Okay?”
“Yeah. I won’t go out with him. To be honest, I wasn’t sure what I was agreeing to. I was too nervous about asking you inside when we got to my place to tell you I’m ready for that date. The real one.”
“Tessa.” He leans over the console and engulfs my face with his big hands. “Say it again.”
“Landon Barker, will you go on a date with me? A real one?”
He doesn’t answer, but instead, his lips press against mine. His tongue glides across my bottom lip, and I open for him. He kisses me without reservation, and suddenly, our argument is no more. The only thing between us now is passion and some pent-up sexual frustration, at least on my end.
My hands grip his shirt as I try to pull him closer. I groan when his lips fall away and he rests his forehead against mine. “We can’t do this here. I won’t risk someone seeing you.”
“What is it you think we’re going to do, Barker?” I ask. I’m breathless from his kiss and giddy from this new development, so the teasing aspect of my question is seriously lacking. Not that either one of us minds.
“I’d rather show you.” Sitting back in his seat, he buckles himself in and backs out of the parking lot.
As soon as we’re on the road, he reaches over and laces his fingers through mine, placing our combined hands on his thigh while he drives.
His grip is firm yet comforting. Outside, I’m cool, calm, and collected now that I’ve caught my breath from his kisses.
On the inside, I’m giddy like the sixteen-year-old me.
I’m glad I let Autumn talk some sense into me.
After only one kiss, I know that any time spent with him, even if it ends in a broken heart, is going to be worth it.