Chapter 16 #2
Lyric didn’t deserve that, and I was more than happy that she wasn’t willing to accept the poor treatment that I’d displayed on Valentine’s Day.
What was supposed to be the perfect day had turned out to be a fucking disaster.
That shit still ate away at me. Now, the first memory we’d have of Valentine’s Day was tarnished – and over my bullshit.
I was attempting to force her into something that she wasn’t ready for.
If I’d just waited two more weeks, we’d be out of the woods and flourishing as a couple.
Open the gate. I shot Lyric a text once I made it to her crib.
The gate opened slowly along with the garage. She was making it clear that it was where she wanted me to park. Instead, I left my car in the driveway and walked through the garage to enter her home. At this point, secrecy was the last thing I was interested in.
“Hi,” Lyric greeted me as I entered.
She’d been waiting for me by the garage door. When I was safely inside, she pressed the button on the wall to lower it. In silence, I examined the redness of her nose and even fluffier eyes.
Quietly, I reached over and pulled Lyric into my chest, kissing her forehead in the process.
The feeling of her arms rounding my body caused a shift in me.
There was no doubt about it. I loved this fucking girl, deeply and unconditionally.
No matter how the last four weeks might have seemed, my love for her never wavered.
It only intensified during our separation.
Loud, uncontrollable sobs escaped her body.
She was a total mess, but admittedly, she was my mess.
The time we’d spent apart was even more complicated than the time we’d spent together.
I never wanted to go back to that so whatever was necessary to get back to one another, I was ready and willing to do.
Feeling Lyric suddenly pull away caused furrowed brows and a questionable stare.
I watched as she plugged her nose and ran in the opposite direction.
My instincts were to follow, so it was exactly what I did.
By the time I made it to the guest bathroom downstairs, her head was in the toilet and heaving.
I tossed the bags with the pregnancy tests inside on the counter and lowered myself to the floor beside her.
As she continued to release whatever was upsetting her stomach, I proceeded to rub her back in circular motions.
When the gagging ended and she could finally catch a breath, Lyric wiped her mouth with the sleeve of her shirt and fell backward onto the wall beside the toilet.
The distance she’d put between us nearly had me sick to my stomach as well.
“Get out, Keanu,” she said, quietly and a bit too calm for my comfort.
“Fuck you mean, Lyric?” I retorted, standing to my feet.
“I meant get out! I can identify cheap ass perfume from a mile away and the one that your company chose to wear is lingering on your clothes. Still fresh.” She gagged, but nothing came up.
I flatlined. Or, at least, it felt as if I did.
So, it was to my surprise that I was able to sigh in frustration and disappointment.
I’d been weak in the flesh less than an hour ago, ready and willing to allow Deidra to do things to me that I’d quickly regret knowing that Lyric was only a phone call away. But we were both too stubborn.
“Lyric,” I started to explain but fell short of words.
Quiet, thick tears fell down her cheeks. She swiftly wiped them one by one, determined to save face. It wasn’t necessary. The pain she felt couldn’t have been compared to the pain I was feeling for causing it.
“We don’t have to be together. I’ve come to terms with this, but that doesn’t make any of this hurt any less,” she told me.
I watched as she pulled her knees up to her chest and then buried her face between them.
Naturally, my desire to comfort her caused me to step forward, but I was quickly reminded of her sensitivity to smell so I stepped back.
This time, though, I put even more distance between us.
The last thing I wanted to do was make her any sicker.
“Yes, we do,” I assured her, “because there’s no one else in the world that can satisfy our souls like each other.”
Lyric never raised her head, but I didn’t miss the kissing of her teeth or the huffing. She didn’t believe shit I had to say and there was nothing to blame but the cheap ass perfume that Deidra had smeared on my threads.
“What’s that supposed to mean, Lyric?”
“The embarrassing scent of your clothes is combating every word falling from your lips, Keanu, but we’re not together so it doesn’t even matter.”
“Everything matters,” I replied.
“Every day, it’ll matter a little less.”
“I didn’t fuck her,” I assured Lyric, desperately needing to get that off my chest.
“It doesn’t matter, Keanu.”
“Then, why are you balled up in a knot, crying?” I asked, bringing awareness to our positions.
She said nothing. The silence that ensued began to chip away at my sanity. With each second that passed, my heart hurt a little more. For what felt like an eternity, she sat with her face hidden from me, and my eyes remained on her frame.
“We have obligations,” she finally spoke, lifting her head as she did so. “Nothing else matters.”
“It all matters,” I reiterated.
“Please shower,” she requested. “So that we can determine if I’m pregnant or not and go about our business.”
Chills ran the length of my spine as I stared back at Lyric.
I wasn’t sure who the girl was that sat a few feet away from me on the floor, but it wasn’t the woman that I’d grown to love more than I did my fucking self.
She’d turned cold. In a matter of minutes, she’d iced her heart and I desperately wanted to warm it.
“Go about our business?” I hissed.
“Please shower, Keanu. I’ll be ready when you’re done.”
Lyric made it to her feet but stayed planted where she was. She refused to come any closer to me. With every move she made and every word that came from her mouth, she was killing me a little more inside.
“What are you doing, Lyric?” I needed to know.
“What you wanted me to, Keanu. You made it clear that this wasn’t working for you. A positive pregnancy test won’t change that,” she stated calmly.
“I was talking out the side of my fucking neck and you know that.”
“You’ve had four weeks to recant, and I haven’t gotten a call, text, or visit. You meant every word you said, Keanu.”
“No the fuck I didn’t.”
“I don’t have the strength to fight you and if I did… I wouldn’t. Our stances are clear.”
“I’m not here to fight.”
“Then, why are you picking one?”
“It’s not my intention. I’m just frustrated and want to work our shit out.”
“Did you only discover that after I called? Twice? Honestly, if I hadn’t would you be here right now? Trying to work our shit out?”
I didn’t respond. Couldn’t. She folded her arms underneath her breasts and waited patiently. She was too calm for my liking. I’d prefer her yelling, screaming, and cussing me the fuck out, but she wasn’t giving me the satisfaction.
“Exactly,” she answered after a while. “When I called you, twice, were you alone?”
Again, I didn’t respond. My silence was enough for her, though. Her head shook as a chuckle fell from her lips.
“But you want to work through our mess? Keanu, you’re a fucking clown. Let’s just hope this test is negative because I’m not interested in raising your first circus act.”
She was hurting, and it was a fact that hurt people hurt people.
But the viciousness of her words left my heart in my shoes.
The pain that soared through me was worse than anything I’d ever felt in life.
Soon, that pain welled in my eyes. Before she could see the damage her words had done, I turned in the opposite direction and started for the stairs so that I could shower.
I expedited my shower. My thoughts were far too intense to stay in any longer than I had to. When I made it back downstairs dressed in a pair of basketball shorts and a white tee that I had stored at Lyric’s, she was waiting for me in the same bathroom.
She, too, had changed. She wore a matching top and bottom that resembled pajamas but I couldn’t be sure if they were. Nevertheless, she looked stunning. Puffy, tired eyes and all, she was still the prettiest girl in the world. As much as I wanted to tell her, my bruised ego wouldn’t allow it.
There wasn’t a single word exchanged between us as Lyric opened the tests that I’d bought – one by one.
Together, we read the instructions for them all before she disappeared into the kitchen.
When she returned, she held a paper cup in her hand.
I observed as she pulled her bottoms down, sat on the toilet, and filled the cup a little more than half.
When she was finished, she sat her urine on the counter and pointed to the tests.
I began uncapping the ones that required her to pee on a stick. The final two required us to use a dropper to drop a little in the circular window. By the time Lyric had cleaned up and washed her hands, I’d activated each test with her urine.