Chapter 18 #2
“Unfortunately, we were unable to locate the baby’s heartbeat during the ultrasound you had less than twenty minutes ago.
After a closer look, we didn’t discover any specific reason for the loss of your baby.
Sometimes our bodies simply fight off anything foreign as if it is a threat to our health and wellness.
I’m so sorry to deliver this news and was hoping for a much better outcome but this is the reality of it all.
Your baby passed naturally through the fluids your body released on the way to the hospital.
There was no way that you or the staff here could’ve prevented this.
Your body simply decided not to carry the baby to term. ”
The words she spoke paralyzed me briefly.
It wasn’t until I heard the unforgettable wails that came from Lyric’s throat that I was snapped back into reality.
That was it. My baby was gone. The child that I’d just gotten to see for the first time a few hours ago.
The one who had the strong heartbeat that reminded me of a train going too many miles per hour on the track.
The one I’d kissed so many times before Lyric had dozed off and even more before I’d left to go play ball.
The one that I’d prayed for just minutes ago.
“FUCK!”
The daunting, heart-shattering shriek that was sourced from my soul rattled my entire body. Everything inside of me somehow died at once. I had no strength. No energy. No voice. No rationality. And, no baby. In a matter of hours, all was lost. I felt like my mind would be the next to go.
“Nah,” Luca said, catching my attention. “Nah,” he repeated before making his way out of the room.
“Nigga, either I’m boo boo the fucking fool or you taking this shit a little too personal,” Laike yell-whispered as he got a bit closer to me.
With his chest out and his nostrils flared, he waited for a response.
He’d be waiting forever because I didn’t have one to give him.
It didn’t take a rocket scientist to know what the fuck was going on.
There wasn’t much explaining to be done.
The cat was out of the bag. Though I’d never intended for it to be the way that it was, I couldn’t change it.
It had been Lyric’s decision to keep them in the dark but now wasn’t the time to talk about any of that. We’d just lost our child and worrying about how a motherfucker felt about anything beyond that wasn’t on my radar. When it all boiled down, it was fuck everybody if necessary.
Choosing not to engage, I left Laike standing with his face in a knot as I exited the hospital room.
Not only was I trying to manage my emotions but facing Lyric as she went through a series of emotions was too fucking much.
So, the thought of managing three other niggas and their feelings just wasn’t in my deck of cards.
Maybe tomorrow, but definitely not tonight.
That didn’t matter to, though, because as soon as I exited the front doors of the hospital, I felt a gush of wind.
Before Luca’s fist was able to connect with my jaw, I weaved and mustered enough energy to square up.
With every blow that Luca landed, I followed up with one.
I could feel my lip began to swell and the blood that quickly filled the inside of my mouth from trauma to my jaw.
Luca’s nose leaked profusely, accompanied by a fire red ear that was a result of my fist.
Everything was happening so fast that I didn’t know we’d locked up until I felt Laike and Liam pulling us apart.
I’d never forget the hurt that sat in Luca’s orbs.
It was the pain that I’d been trying to avoid since the first night I was intimate with Lyric.
Yet, here were where, both hurting and both deep in our fucking feelings.
“Tonight, Luca? Like right now, my nigga? By any means, I’m down to tussle but fight me tomorrow, nigga. Tonight, I don’t have any fight in me. I just… I just lost my fucking kid, yo!”
Pointing toward the doors we’d just walked from, I reminded him.
Hands on my knees as I leaned forward, I tried catching my breath.
Nothing made sense. Nothing. Nothing but the tears that fell from my eyes to the ground as I focused on breathing and not dying because for the first time in my life, that’s what it felt like I was doing.
Dying. The pain was too excruciating to survive. This had to be the end of me. My heart had been ripped right out of my fucking chest. A heartless nigga. That’s what I’d been reduced to.
The moment I stood straight in an attempt to contain my volcanic emotions, Luca’s arms swarmed my body as he pulled me into him. The strength that I didn’t have to hold myself up with any longer, he mustered. And the same thick tears that fell from my eyes, he cried them.
“FUCK!” he howled, the pain in his heart surfacing in his actions and words. “Fuck, man!”
“I’m wrong, my nigga. I’m wrong. But, I can’t beef with you today or no other day. Today, I need you.”
“Ain’t no beef, nigga. Not today or tomorrow. Never. And, I’m right here. My shit hurting, too. I got you!” Luca cried into my shoulder.
I’m not sure how long we stood there, holding one another and pounding each other’s backs as the tears flowed freely.
These were my brothers for life and I felt like I’d betrayed them in the worst way possible.
Lyric wasn’t just their responsibility. She’d been mine since the day that I met her.
And, for her, we’d all step. There weren’t any questions.
“Aight. Aight. Aight. Ya’ll niggas starting to look like hoes over there. Break that shit up,” Laike yelled.
“Watch your mouth,” Liam fussed, popping Laike in the chest.
“Damn, I be forgetting y’all be so close,” Laike winced as he shook his head.
Once the dust cleared and the smoke settled, the four of us stood against the brick wall just outside of the emergency room exit with our backs against the wall. There was silence amongst us as everyone adjusted to our new reality.
“Well, welcome to the family,” Liam chuckled.
“He’s been that,” Luca reminded Liam.
“Ummm. Hmmm. So, not too much will change.”
More silence, everyone lost in their thoughts, and the new dynamic amongst us. Then, again, Liam spoke.
“Before you put another one in her, you’d better put a ring on that finger of hers or you and I will have our first disagreement. Ask your brothers here, I’m the last nigga you want to rumble with. I don’t play fair,” he warned.
“No need for threats, old man. I’ve had the ring for over a month now. Your daughter is just so stubborn. And, I refused to slide that ring on her finger until everyone knew and I’d asked for her hand in marriage. But, I guess that’s my blessing?”
“That’s your blessing,” Liam agreed.
“I’d rather it be you,” Luca added with a nod, “I’d much rather it be you.
Not only because I know your heart, but because I know that you won’t play with hers.
With you, I won’t have to worry as I do.
I know you’ll take care of my sister. That’s all I ever wanted for her.
Lyric is sometimes lost and can’t always find her own way.
That’s why we look out for her the way we do.
But with you in her life, I know you’ll light the path for her and give me and this psychotic nigga a break.
I don’t have to worry about you messing over her or doing her dirty because you out of all niggas know we get our lick back in blood. ”
“You niggas know you can’t take me, right?” I asked, looking from Luca to Laike.
“Yeah, aight. Believe that if you want to,” Laike sniggered.
“I’m really from the trenches, my nigga. You high yella niggas from the burbs. I’ve rumbled in the jungle. You’ve been in The Hills since the day your mother gave birth. Please don’t poke the beast.”
“This nigga swear,” Luca said as he sucked the skin of his teeth.
“Yeah, aight.”
Laike stepped forward, scratching his head as he glared at me through squinted eyes. He was thinking and he was thinking hard.
“Bentley truck? Valentine’s Day? Nigga, that’s what you couldn’t lay up with me? You were laying up with my sister?”
Tossing my hands in the air, I admitted my guilt.
“Guilty as charged. She was there. That was also the day that I called myself ending things with her because she wouldn’t let me tell you or Luca what was going on with us.
She’s never driven it. In fact, she instructed me to return it.
I was trying to see if it was crack she was smoking or what? ”
“Sounds like Lyric,” Liam stated.
“Aw. She got this nigga’s nose wide open,” Laike joked, “This nigga got her a Bentley truck. Y’all gone stay broke as long as y’all got women.
See me, I get in and get out before they can even start to ask for anything.
Before they open their mouths, I’m out the way.
Bye!” he emphasized, dramatic as his sister.
“Ain’t this the same gentleman that just laced Baisleigh with a watch worth two bricks?” I asked Luca, wondering if I was confused or if he was shitting us both.
“This the one,” Luca confirmed.
“Thought so.”
“Okay, She different,” he yelled, defending himself.
“Lyric is different.” I boasted.
“Ever, she damn sure is different.” Luca bragged.
“Y’all act like y’all got the coldest things in Channing. Get the fu–,” he paused, looking toward his father and whispering as he continued so that Liam didn’t hear him.
“Get the fuck out of here.”
“We kinda do, though. Na, we definitely do.” I nodded, unable to deny the fact.
“Whatever. Lyric is a brat and you know it. Ever, she looks like she whisper to spirits and be stuffing your pubic hairs in voodoo dolls.”
“If you value your smile and the teeth in your mouth then I suggest you shut up so you can keep them,” Luca warned.
“It’s been a minute, but I don’t mind showing you what these hands do, my nigga,” Laike responded, bouncing around.
Luca remained calm, turning in my direction and asking, “Can you get your fam, man?”
“That’s your fam,” I reminded him.